A World Only We Know
by Timely
Summary: He's Uchiha Ryuu, prodigy cousin of Shisui. She's Kinnara of the Sand, pacifist twin of Gaara. They were pulled together and apart in our world, but now they will be used to change the Narutoverse. Even if he wants to destroy it as she tries to save it. (Fem&Male SI/OC Fic) AU OCxOC
1. Rebirth

_**The little summary is quoted from Naruto. Obito's words, not mine.**_

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto, but on Fanfiction, I am allowed to play with it (to an extent).

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><p><em><strong><em><strong>"Once we are, we will always be." - Kao Kalia Yang<strong>_**_

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><p><em><strong>1 - Rebirth<strong>_

**(His Story)**

It was a stupid mistake. The stupidest anyone can make in that field of work.

Don't hesitate, don't care. Get in and get out.

But in that moment, all I could remember were my baby brothers and sisters. Babies because they're forever frozen in our childhood.

As I aged, they remained young. As I killed, they remained dead. As I mourned, they remained buried within the earth, far away from me.

I watched the boy, my age when they had died, stand in front of his siblings, all five of them huddle together. Was that how they died?

But it didn't matter anymore. I felt as the bullets hit me from that young man's gun. He did not flinch, no guilt in those dark eyes and dark face.

Oddly enough, the only protest I had was that the bullets were destroying the letters and the two photos I had left of everything: a family photo when I was sixteen and a photo of her and me back in our senior year. All I could think about before the ground met me, was that I couldn't even protect the inanimate things I loved and cherished.

I could feel everything grow cold even as I struggled to crawl to my side. I just wanted to feel them one last time, look at them.

With bloody fingers, I grasped for the slips of papers, all tied neatly with two strings, but I fought with them to free the words that meant everything to me.

My eyes couldn't focus enough on the letters, already soaked with blood, but I did not need eyes to see. No, I had read these letters over and over again until they were sketched onto my heart.

_Dear Xen,_

_I hope this letter made it to you safely. I attached a photo of us back in high school. I hope that you're safe. They told me that you might not get this letter, but I'm writing it just in case you do. _

I coughed up blood, the letters beginning to fall out of my grasp as I covered my mouth. Letters kept falling from my hand as I forced my broken body towards the wall. More blood spurted out from my mouth as I grimaced.

_Dear Xen,_

_I found a new anime to watch as I wait for Kishimoto to update Naruto. It's been boring, but I know you will love Naruto. When you come back, we'll do a marathon. I think you'll love the ninja world, it's such a complex. Everyone in Naruto is striving for peace, just like you._

I couldn't help but pause as I coughed up more blood, already feeling as the blood began to choke me.

_Dear Xen,_

_I know that this is the twentieth letter that I've sent and you haven't replied. It's okay. I will write to you just in case you are getting these._

One bloody hand covered my mouth as the other dragged me forward to the wall.

_ Dear Xen,_

_Why is it that you chose to join the marines? I thought it was your dream to become a doctor? I guess you are completing that dream though, aren't you? I know that you enlisted as a medical specialist. But…the fighting too? Please, be safe._

I pushed every part of my body with each drag, fighting the darkness and the cold.

_Dear Xen,_

_I hate this war, I hate how you're not here, but there. Why won't you write me back? Are you really not getting these? Please, be safe Xen. Be safe and be alive. Return soon. _

I hated how I never fucking replied to those letters, so cowardly. So afraid of what she would think of me.

_Dear Xen,_

_What is peace? I know you hate it when I make references to Naruto, but I can't just help question what you're doing, what everyone is doing. Nagato made some good points about peace and you would know what Nagato said if you had just watched Naruto with me. But, Xen, can war, violence, and death, really result in peace for everyone or just for those who win? _

I hated how I didn't join the marines for peace, but to run away from my own demons.

_Dear Xen,_

_I hate the path you've chosen. It's taken you far from me and everyone else. I wish you had stayed. I wish that your family was still here. Sometimes, I find myself walking pass your old house and I keep thinking that your younger siblings will be there and I can talk to them about Naruto and the latest manga…_

I wished I had died with them that day at the hand of that man. Maybe, maybe I could have saved them.

_Dear Xen,_

_I'm sorry, Xen. I'm so sorry._

I had spent so long, too much time, feeling sorry for surviving longer than they had.

_Dear Xen,_

_Even if they're not here when you return, I will be. _

Do you think they would hate me? I haven't visited them since I buried them all those years ago.

_Dear Xen,_

_I visited their graves today. I told them that you'll visit them when you return. Will you, Xen?_

I could never return back to that empty house, to that empty town. I just couldn't and now, I never will again.

_Dear Xen,_

_I hate you. Why won't you reply?_

I hated myself.

_Dear Xen,_

_I did not mean what I said before. I'm just tired of writing to someone who may not be there._

I had waited so long for death. It's ironic that when it finally comes, I wanted nothing more than to live.

_Dear Xen,_

_Where are you? _

I was dying in a place so far from where those I loved were buried.

_Dear Xen,_

_I miss you. I miss us. I miss everyone. Come home soon._

I missed them more than anything.

_Dear Xen,_

_I don't care what about the things you've done, who you think you've become, because all of the letters I've written, is to my Xen. I'm still waiting for you to come home._

I did not want to meet them again like this.

**_Dear Xen…_**

**_I_**_…_

I've lived fifteen years without my family…

**_Xen_**_…_

…and ten without her.

**_Dear Xen…_**

I'm not the Xen they knew. He had died with them.

**We…you…**

How could they ask him to continue on without them?

_Dear Xen,_

I stared at the last two letters in my hand. One of them from her before she left, another unfinished letter from her death.

_I'm sorry for the argument we got into last night. I know you didn't mean the words you said. I'm sorry for pushing you. I'll make you a promise: let's meet again one year after your service to Japan._

I should have stayed with her, **forced** her to stay with me.

_You better remember. If you don't, not even your marine training can protect you from my wrath. We can finally watch that Naruto Marathon and you can finally write a letter back to me. For now, don't worry. I'll be back soon from my study abroad…_

I finally reached the wall, with unsteady and weak arms, I propped myself up against the wall and finally took out the two pictures. I slowly tried to wipe the blood off of them, but the red continued marring them. I stared at them with unfocused eyes, but like the letters…their images were forever sketched into my soul.

My fingers twisted around the other letter, the one her parents had given me at her funeral, the one she never finished, the one that held so many broken dreams and memories.

_…I love you Xen, more than anything in this world. If you don't know where to turn to, turn to me. If you feel alone, I'll be alone with you. If you think it's not okay to cry, I'll cry for you. Just come back to me Xen…_

But I did. I came back and you weren't there.

I've been so alone and you weren't there. I haven't cried because I keep waiting for you to cry for me. I can't come back, because I know you won't be there for me to return to.

I never even got to say those three words back to you.

I crumpled our picture in my hand. In this moment, I would have been laughing if it did not hurt so much. Talking to a dead person, how sad. My eyes darkened though.

I felt as the darkness finally consumed me, the pain of blood chocking my lungs, slowly killing me. My fists clenched around the photos and the letters.

**I did not want to die alone.**

Those were my last thoughts before my story ended...and it would not begin again for a while. When I died then, I would not realize what will become of my soul, the soul containing these memories that I had clung to so desperately as to not forget them, forget that I was once loved and once loved.

I did not want to die alone...but then I flew and I was no more.

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><p><em>Death is an eternal sleep, not just of the body, but the memories encompassing the body. But sometimes, memories are so embedded into us that they become a part of us, a part of our soul.<em>

_Maybe that is how reincarnation happens. Not that you are reborn, but that you are reborn with the memories that you couldn't forget. _

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><p><strong>(Her Story)<strong>

I remember floating when I finally heard his voice. I knew I was dead. I knew I had been dead for a while before I heard the voice.

I was a Christian, but it had not prepared me for this; this sense of an afterlife. Is this what they meant by eternity?

I remembering dying. One minute I was in a car, writing a letter to a certain someone, his name (how I knew it was a he) eluded me, but I knew I was writing a letter. The process had been so familiar, so instinctual, as if I had written to him many times before.

But then there was a screech, a crash, and I remember feeling so much pain then…I only felt the calmness of death as it embraced me.

I knew that I was supposed to go, move to the next "life". I remember that when I first flew away from my body, there was a silent urge for me to keep flying upwards and towards the unending light of darkness.

It was darkness as it was light. When people described the whole "Follow the Light," they were lying. It was not just light. There was also darkness.

However, I couldn't. I could feel the urge to go with it, to go towards that world of beautiful light and darkness, but something held me back.

So instead I floated between the stars, swam across universes, and simply existed within the cosmos. It sounds ridiculous, but that was how I existed for a long time. I was waiting for something…someone. I did not know who, just that I made a promise.

Then everything was broken and I knew that my time was starting again.

After days and days of existing among everything and yet nothing, I felt the tug even as I heard the faint voice. It hurt and it was painful. My safe existence was suddenly being pulled and prodded. I could hear a faint words…

_I don't want to die alone_, a voice called out to me.

It was the first sound I've heard since the darkness and light path closed for me. His voice was so sad and so tired.

I struggled towards where his voice came from, but then something pulled at me and I felt as a burst of light dragged me downwards.

Down…down…down, I fell.

I was no longer swimming in eternity, I no longer felt the comfort of the stars and the cosmos. Instead, I fell only into light. Not a darkness that was light or a light that was dark. No.

I fell into the light and I felt as something akin to tears fell from my existence. It hurt. It hurt so badly. Physically (when did I get a body) it hurt, but emotionally, I felt hurt too because once again, I had failed him. I could not reach him when he had called out to me, the voice I had been waiting for.

But as I fell into the light, the pain bursting and exploding into me and out of me, I remembered everything.

A reflection of who I was. Then a face with dark hair and brown eyes, a little boy who cried, a teenage adolescent who pulled me into a kiss, a man who shoved me away. Tears, I remember our tears that day as we buried seven coffins. Then the images spun faster and faster.

Images flashed across my vision as everything got brighter and brighter. I was becoming blind (I could see again?) as I heard screams (I could hear?) and then _I_ screamed, cried (I had a voice?!) and then the memories all escaped from the cosmos and into me—

And I remembered. Then…

…I was born.

The light was blurry, but it was a light and I kept crying. Crying and screaming because I had not felt so _alive_ in so long.

My rebirth was filled with light and much, much, noise. However, the light was still so blurry and my vision could only see the murky outlines of people, but soft hands, warm hands cradled me even as I heard shouting and crying. There were two presences next to mine. I could hear voices in a foreign language.

It reminded me so much of him.

And then I realized that I could remember, I could think. I could see (a little), and hear. I heard my own voice, a cry only along with another crying, one louder than mine and right next to me. But most of all, I could _feel_.

I felt as soft hands cradled me, two warm bodies pressing against me. One was smaller than the other, the larger presence touched me and I heard her voice over the combined crying of me and the other smaller figure next to me. Her voice was…in awe and, I felt a tug at my heart, pain.

"They're so small, so feeble. My babies," she cried out softly, so softly, and I felt as she began to cry. "They're too small. No matter what happens, I will always protect the two of you…my Gaara, my Kinnara."

Wait. Gaara, Kinnara?…where—

And more memories filled me. Ninjas, mangas, anime. A boy with blonde hair and whiskers, a gourd of sand, and red eyes.

**Naruto**…

My crying only increased, mostly because even though a part of me was in disbelief, the other part of me, her daughter, cried because at that moment, I felt as she died.

"Karura!"

More shouting happened. Next to me, the other body—Gaara's?—cried even louder.

**No way…**

I felt as I was picked up and I cried even more because I did not want to leave her yet. I did not want to become separated from Gaara.

But that's the thing.

**Gaara…**

There was just no way had I just been reborn, much less into the Narutoverse…and as Gaara of the Sand's twin.

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><p><strong><em>Until Next Time...<em>**

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><p><em>AN: __[Dedicated to: K.M.L and T.K]_


	2. Sand

**_Disclaimer: _**If you want Naruto, go to Kishimoto.

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><p><strong><em>"Time had been something we feared, but with the babies, the things that held time together - the years, the months, the weeks, the days - melted and flowed toward the future." - Kao Kalia Yang<em>**

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><p><strong><em>2 - Sand<em>**

**_~Kinnara~_**

My time as an infant was a blur. I don't remember much, just glimpses from being held by unknown arms. I slept most of the time, dreaming dreamless things. It was almost like the afterlife again, except that I had senses. And minus the stars and the cosmos, but that was not important.

I was alive and I could _feel_.

I could only see as much as my body developed though and that was not much. I wish more than anything to forget the food, err, milk? It might have tasted good if I did not remember better things, but I did so my baby-self had hated drinking the formulas and milk they gave me and Gaara.

Gaara…

We were always together. It was always us. I didn't understand anyone, but I understood Gaara. He kept me sane. I've never been so tuned with someone.

He liked curling up against me when we slept. So the first thing I woke up to was always Gaara and then I would always fall asleep with him.

The first time I could see clearly, the first time the world of light was not a mere blur, it was Gaara's face that met my eyes. We had both been lying down on our stomachs, next to each other, sleeping. When I opened my eyes, I saw his auburn hair first then his tiny features.

He. Was. _Adorable_.

I've always thought he was cute from watching the anime and seeing the manga, but up close and real, Gaara was the freaking cutest and adorablest (I know it's not a word) baby ever.

I had always adored Gaara, a favorite character of mine, but I realized I had never _loved_ him. At least, not like this. He had never been so real to me.

When I saw him for the first time as Kinnara, there was nothing, but love for him, my brother. I did not have siblings in my other life. Gaara, and I realize Temari and Kankuro, were new experiences. I never saw Temari and Kankuro though…but I was expecting that.

However, as the days flew us by, seeing then talking (baby gibberish really) flew by and time flowed. My attention spam was short.

Everything called to me. After so many years, days, just wondering the cosmos, I was finally able to feel and touch the world again. I really did feel like a baby. But what really got my attention, much to my surprise, was the sand. Or at least, the incident with sand that changed everything.

Now, here was something I've always wandered…but when exactly did Suna start realizing that the sand protected Gaara? Well, I got my answer.

It was when we first started learning to crawl. Gaara and I were where we always were, on top of the softest and warmest cloud (Okay, so in the back of my adult mind with memories of my adult life and my adult intelligence, I knew it was just a bed and a blanket, but after years of literally floating around in the cosmos, could you blame a girl?).

I don't know how old we were. Time was non-existent to me. But we were growing. And I was the first to start crawling. However, my first adventure with crawling led everyone to realize (I think this may be how they discovered with Gaara) that the sand was more than just an inanimate grain for Gaara and I. No, it was also a protection, the strongest to ever exist in the Narutoverse, I would argue.

But I don't remember much except that I was excited. I was _moving_. I could move. I was dumb really, but I couldn't help it. It's been so long since I've been able to just move myself and feel the strains of a body.

So I went overboard on the crawling. Literally.

I remember falling and feeling an immense fear about why the world suddenly had no ground. And then I felt it.

The sand.

It was rough, the sand scratching against my fragile skin, skin that was only used to warm hands and soft blankets. The roughness was what scared me. I did the only thing babies did when scared. I cried, loud and clear.

Next thing I knew, Gaara was crying too, our crying coming together in unison. Then came the loud sound of crashing feet. Stealthy shinobis of Suna indeed…

"Kinnara-sama! Gaara-sama!"

"Kinnara!"

"Gaara!"

Voices, when Gaara's and my world had been so quiet, filled our safe haven. I could tell, by the sound of everyone moving around me, that they were trying to approach me, but did not know how. I could hear the murmur of fear and awe along with shock from everyone.

Then words that changed my whole world, were spoken.

"Is it the demon?"

"Watch out, what if—"

"Don't go near Gaara—"

"Stay back!"

I don't remember what happened next, only that the sand continued to cradle me as I heard their voices and felt their fear. I remember snuggling deeper into the sand, my heart twisting in pain at their words. Gaara continued crying and I wanted nothing more than to be next to him again, but I fell asleep in the sand's cradle.

I had forgotten about Shukaku and that the sand demon was in both of us. Chiyo's seal was said to be weak from my old world, but it was strong enough at the beginning of my life though. I was never bothered by Shukaku until later.

But remembering that he was in both Gaara and I explained everything.

It was only later when I realized how strange those memories were. Gaara and I were always alone. Gaara did not cry much and, well, neither did I. But we were _always_ alone. Or whoever was watching us was very good at hiding themselves.

And we were always in the same place, a round bed. We had our feeding, but then that was the only time we had other human contact. Sometimes though, I would feel the presence of a man—our father?—and he would hold me and Gaara. I remember soft words, the voice so deep and his chest would move with each breath and I remember just falling asleep to his voice, feeling so protected.

However, after the sand incident—I guess everyone found out Gaara could do the same—there were no more secret nights within those warm masculine arms and I did not hear that deep voice again.

After that incident with our first encounter of the sand, Gaara and I were even more alone. I stopped remembering the days of our toddler days.

But the things I did remember though, was that I slept a lot. And that meant I dreamt.

However, I did not dream about random things. I dreamt about my old life.

I dreamed about my parents, about school, about Naruto, and about _him_.

Xen once told me about alternative universes. He believed in most of the sci-fi theories of time travel, parallel universes, and worm holes. If he was not so obsessed with the medical field, he would have fit right into quantum physics. He loved the impossibilities that existed in our world.

Then again, Xen was very superstitious to begin with. He believed in a lot of things, just not in himself. I've tried understanding my new life through Xen's eyes.

Xen believed in reincarnation and…that was the only reasonable explanation for this.

But my past "life" was not helping me here and I don't think physics from my old world will help me much in this world…when I figure out what exactly was going on. I was not complaining though.

I am in my favorite manga, with a favorite character. But I did question a lot though.

If this was reincarnation, I should not have previous memories of my life, right?! Or was this a dream and I was actually in a coma back at a hospital? Where is the damn hand book for being reborn when you need it?

But it was okay because I realized my answers would come. My life as Kinnara had not begun yet. So, I did what any toddler did. I slept.

And I dreamed. When I dreamed, I was always looking from above and never from within.…

_…I looked down at the photo album, tracing his face in one of the larger family photos with his first cousins from his paternal side. There were so many of them._

_ "What's this?"_

_Xen smiled softly, his gaze warming at the photo. I wanted to laugh at the ridiculous photo, the photographer trying to squeeze all of the people in. It was so large that trying to get faces were hard. _

_"My family. It's my father's clan, you can say," he said. _

_"Clan? Like in Naruto?"_

_He rolled his eyes at me. "Yes, like in Naruto, but not exactly. You know how we have eighteen main clans?"_

_I nodded, turning my attention to him._

_"Well, there are a lot of us out there, but this photo is from my father's particular branch of the Xiong clan."_

_"So," I began, "like the Hyuuga clan and their different branches?"_

_"The what?" His eyes scrunched up in confusion._

_"Xen! That's it, we're doing a marathon," I said, snapping the album shut. _

_"I watched on episode already," he muttered as I tried to get him up. _

_"Then how can you forget about the Hyuuga? You were watching Neji and Hinata during the Chunin exams!"_

_"I was? Were they the ones with the weird eyes?"_

_I groaned…_

_…I listened as he replied back in his language, his voice suddenly changing. Listening to Xen talk his main language, I realized that his voice sounded so much more confident and smoother. I shifted a little as he replied to his brother, Su. _

_"Tej zaum. Kuv tsis," he stopped though when a small body tackled him. "Ua li cas?"_

_He knelt a little to listen to his little sister as she whispered something in Hmong. His face was serious, his brows coming together, before a smile flashed across his face. He turned back to me as she let him go and suddenly ran off, not waiting for an introduction between us._

_I looked after her before turning back to him. I eyed his sudden smirk. Su smiled also._

_"I'll see you. Nice to meet you," the younger boy said before following their little sister to the backyard. _

_"What did she say," I asked Xen._

_"She said you're very pretty," he whispered, stepping closer to me._

_I blinked again, feeling as my face warmed. "Really? Well, I think she's prettier."_

_Xen laughed at my response. "I'll tell her you said that…"_

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><p><strong>"Dreams are intermittently our greatest desires and worst reality."<strong>

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><p><em>…I stood still as he faced away from me, away from everyone. They, we, were giving him space, no one daring to go near Xen as he cried. The boy—man—I loved knelt on the ground, hands on his knees. His shoulders shook even as no sound came from him.<em>

_Voices, of a language I don't speak but loved, filled the wide room. Usually, I would find Xen's language beautiful, but today, nothing was. I don't think anything will ever be beautiful again. Especially for Xen. _

_I wanted to go to him, but knew that everyone would disapprove and in return, Xen would disapprove. These were the only people he had left. _

_I stood alone, just like Xen mourned alone. _

_They were about to bury them, about to close the coffins. I stared at the seven coffins, the smallest one breaking my heart. _

_I stared at them, the seven of them, all laid out in front of Xen like an altar._

_I knew that Xen would never be the same again…_

I jerked awake, my dream waking me. My eyes blinked back tears. I stared up into the ceiling, my heart racing as my breaths came in heavy tattoos. After a while, I turned to my side, searching the darkness in my room.

I was four now. And at first, the dreams were good. So good. Memories of my past life, the happy ones, filled my years and my nights. However, the dreams, the memories, also contained bad ones.

Every night, every day, guilt and pain clawed at me. It was the same. Dreams of my old life, of the other world. _He_ always woke me up.

I knew there was nothing I could do, nothing to change the things that I've done and the fact that I could not stop myself from dying…but I still can't believe that I left him behind.

I felt as tears appeared in my eyes. Sniffling, I closed my eyes against the darkness. I could hear Gaara sleeping beside me. Gaara never snored, but his breathing was also a slight louder. I ran a hand over my face and wiped the tears as best as I could. I did not want Gaara to miss the big day tomorrow because of no sleep.

But the tears kept coming and I held in my sobs.

Of all the things I regret the most, it was leaving him behind. I wonder how he was now, if he was married? Children? Did he miss me—?

"Ki, why are you crying?"

At Gaara's voice and his cute nickname for me, I furiously wiped my tears. I felt as he came to my side, taking hold of my hand.

"What's wrong, Ki?"

"Ki is okay, Gaa," I whispered to him as my fingers tightened around his.

We laid together in the darkness, both listening to each other's breathing as we've done for the past four years. Gaara knew I was not okay, but he must have known I did not want to talk about it. Instead, being Gaara, he tried to distract me.

"Are we really going out tomorrow?"

"Hai," I replied softly, turning onto my back, our hands still linked. "It's okay Gaa, Ki will protect you."

Gaara bristled, shifting at my words as he turned to his side to look at me in the darkness.

"Who is Y-Yashimura?"

"Yashamaru," I corrected him softly. "He's okaa-sa's otouto."

"Like how I'm your otouto?"

I laughed softly at his reply. Gaara was so cute. "Iie, Gaa. You're my nii-san, I'm your imouta."

Or at least I think I am. It would make sense that Gaara was born ahead of me. I felt as he copied me, lying on his back, our hands still intersected.

"Oh," came his cute reply. Then moments later, "Do you think okaa-sa's otouto will," Gaara wavered a little as he whispered the last part, "like us?"

"Yes," I replied without hesitance. "He will love us as okaa-sa loves us."

At first, when I did not know the truth about Yashamaru, I had thought he was a dick. After all, who could be so cruel to this little guy? But then again, I had thought the same about Itachi. However, the two of them are probably my most admirable characters.

"How…how do you know okaa-sa loves us," Gaara asked with sadness in his voice. My fingers tightened around his. Gaara, poor Gaara.

"Because Gaa, she protects us all the time."

This got his attention. "She does?"

I nodded, but then realized he could not see. "Hai. She's the sand, Gaa. She's all around us. Has the sand ever let anything hurt us?"

Gaara, who understood how the sand has always protected us, took my word for it. "Oh."

He remained quiet for a while before suddenly moving towards me in the dark and curling around me. I hugged him also, resting my head next to his.

"Night Gaa," I whispered to him as I felt his breathing become deeper, Gaara falling asleep.

Watching him asleep, I felt immense love for him. I knew I should treasure these moments. When the seal weakens, so will Gaara's ability to sleep with Shukaku bothering him. But I'm here and as the second holder of the jinchuuriki, I was not going to allow Shukaku to mess with Gaara.

I moved my free hand, the one not in Gaara's, to touch his hair and move the covers closer to him.

I did not have siblings in my old life. I was an only child and quite spoilt from what others told me. I laid on my side and stared at my twin brother, the only sibling I've ever known. Gaara and I had only seen Temari and Kankuro once when the Kazekage had taken them to meet us a month ago.

At the moment, because I was so protective of Gaara, I did not care much for Temari and Kankuro. I knew they would one day become great siblings, but because we were all too young to understand anything, Temari and Kankuro were unsure of how to treat us. Their aloofness had hurt Gaara during our first meeting, and even though I knew it was more to do with uncertainty than dislike, I couldn't help but be angry.

I loved Gaara and I knew that he loved me too. I constantly told him I loved him too because I remembered how the young Gaara from my world did not even know that word. I was not trying to take over Yashamaru's role as Gaara's beloved uncle, but I was just making a place for myself as his dear sister. Siblings, after all, had only each other in the end.

A pair of small brown eyes that belonged to an adorable face flashed in my mind.

I felt my chest tightened, tears biting at my eyes. I could not help it. I thought about _him_…and then I focused back on Gaara, on what it meant to have a sibling. I thought about the Uchiha brothers.

I never understood before, Itachi's love for Sasuke. I was touched by it, moved by it, and even swore by Itachi's love…but I had never understood it. Then there was Madara and Izuna; Madara loving his brother so much he was willing to destroy everything in the name of his deceased loved one.

I had sisters and brothers, friends who I considered family, but that was different from the sisters and brothers that _were_ family. Before, I never understood it, but I do now.

My fingers clenched around my pillow as I brought it up against my chest. Just imagining Gaara hurt or dead…I felt so angry at the prospect, so hurt…and also so scared at how empty my life would be without him. I was only four, four years with him, but I could not imagine life without Gaara. He was my nii-san, my twin, my other half.

I closed my eyes shut and I thought about _him_ again.

I was beginning to understand how he became what he became, how he had said those words to me then, how he refused to return home. I remember his eyes, they had become so empty since that horrible day. They never smiled at me the same, never lit up like they once did.

I began to understand why Sasuke had loved Itachi so much before the massacre and even after. Even though I knew Gaara would probably become crazy one day from Shukaku (not if I can help it), I couldn't bring myself to hate him. It's how Sasuke could never actually hate Itachi without loving him.

I understood now. I finally understood how the truth behind the massacre made Sasuke hate Konoha even if it meant going against what his brother desired, even if it meant ruining Itachi's sacrifice.

I remember Sasuke's words to Itachi when the older Uchiha was canceling the Edo Tensei. How even though he knew Itachi would want him to protect Konoha, Sasuke, as Itachi's little brother, would have been willing to destroy the place that had hurt his brother so much. Even if it had meant fighting Itachi himself.

The love for a sibling, especially one who had been wronged and used, surpasses even the desires of that person. For Sasuke to become what he had become, it made sense.

I would not be able to forgive anyone who hurt Gaara…

…so why had I asked _him_ to forgive that man?

* * *

><p><strong><em>Until Next Time...<em>**

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><p><em>AN - There was a four year time skip - hope no confusion_

_*"Tej zaum. Kuv tsis...ua li cas?" is Hmong. It's translated to, "Maybe. I don't...what's wrong?"-_

_Note: An intersting fact about Kinnara's name. One reason I chose it was because of the kanji spelling for it: 緊那羅(Kinnara). The last Kanji is the same one used in Gaara's name: 我愛羅 (Gaara) and Karura's (加流羅). Second is because all three derive from Buddhist mythology. Look it up if you are interested._


	3. Mirror

**Disclaimer**: If you want to buy Naruto, then don't look here. I don't own Naruto.

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><p><strong>"Emotions are captive to reality," - Kao Kalia Yang<strong>

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><p><strong>3 - Mirror<strong>

**~Kinnara~**

I was excited. We were meeting Yashamaru for the first time, something I was wondering about for a while. I knew he tried to kill Gaara, but I've always seen Yashamaru as a Suna version of Itachi with less of a story background.

However, I still liked him. Gaara was standing behind me, his hand in mine. As soon as we had left the room, the first for the both of us, Gaara had stuck to holding me.

We waited as the Kazekage entered the room, a room we had been led to and left alone. He paused, his dark eyes taking us in. He wore his full kage suit so only his eyes were visible. I felt as Gaara flinched at his stern stare, but I only squeezed his hand reassuringly. I faced the Kazekage, my father, full on and smiled. It was a genuine one too.

I still think the Kazekage was a douche, but at the end, he at least repented for what he did to Gaara. I was just happy to learn the truth about Yashamaru and Karura. It was clear how much the Kazekage regretted failing Gaara as a father and Karura as a husband. So I smiled the best I could for the man that I knew he could be, instead of the man he was.

I was not expecting any form of reaction. So for him to suddenly stiffen, his stern eyes suddenly faltering as if he had just seen a ghost, surprised me. He turned away though, his back to us, before I could analyze his sudden change.

There were no words said as the Kazekage collected him (I think). Moments of silence went by, before he finally turned back to us, his face stern again. My smile never left my face, softening only a little because my cheek bones started to tire.

"Gaara," he whispered then his eyes, unflinching this time, met mine. "Kinnara."

"Otousan," I replied back, my voice happy. Gaara, following my lead, minus the joy, also whispered a greeting.

"O-otousama," he stuttered a little in his hesitance to address the Kazekage as father.

I felt as Gaara stuck closer to me. I only responded with a swing of our interlaced fingers.

I could see how the Kazekage's eyes widen for a brief moment, his eyes taking us in. He never visited us, and that one time with Kankuro and Temari, he had not addressed us at all so it was the first time we've ever called him father.

When he only remained silent, the three of us waited. I could feel how the Kazekage's stern eyes were studying us, but I refuse to fall under it, instead, I wanted to show him that we were not—at least, not yet—under Shukaku's mental attack. So I kept smiling at him, making sure the smile was not too bright, but not non-existent either.

I don't know how long time passed us until Yashamaru came into the room. I had never been happier to see someone in both of my lives. As soon as the man entered the room, his eyes first focusing on the Kazekage and greeting him, I brought Gaara and me forward.

"Konichiwa!"

I flushed a little.

God, I did not realize how childish and high my voice was. I guess having Gaara as my only company in four years would do that to me.

I kept back my frown though, not wanting to ruin the moment with it in case Yashamaru found it strange or that it can cause Gaara to become even more scared.

My voice, even though I was sure had nothing lethal in it, froze the young shinobi. It was as if he was in slow motion as he turned to us, his eyes widening when he finally saw us. At the shock and surprise in his eyes, I realized that he did not know he was meeting us today. I could feel Gaara fidgeting behind me and I quickly bowed my head. I felt as Gaara copied my lead again.

"Hajime mashite," I said politely before looking back up into the still dazed and almost stricken eyes of Yashamaru. "Yoroshiku onegaishimasu."

I greeted him as was expected. Gaara muttered the same greeting after me. Aw, he was just too adorable.

As soon as Gaara started speaking, Yashamaru seemed to have snapped out of whatever fervor he was in because he was smiling at us…and wow.

Okay. Yashamaru had the best smile. Like ever. With that very smile, he turned to the both of us.

"Gaara-sama," he said softly first, before addressing me, "Kinnara-sama."

I saw from the corner of my eyes, the Kazekage's stern eyes had watched the greeting before quickly turning to Yashamaru.

"Yashamaru," he began with an edge to his voice, "these are your new charges."

Yashamaru made no reply, simply turning back to the Kazekage. I did not need to see his face to know that his smile had fallen. He made no reply, simply staring at the Kazekage as the older shinobi continued.

"I've assign you as squad leader of the medical team tasked to guard Gaara and Kinnara. Their well-being are important to the future of Sunagakure. I am placing them under your direct care and supervision."

With those words, the Kazekage turned to leave. I felt anger erupted from me. He was just going to leave like that? Well…

"Farewell, otousan," I called after him, bowing my head.

Gaara, his small hands tightening against mine, bowed his head also, but remained silent. I watched as the Kazekage froze at the door, his hesitance clear. It was a brief moment, as if he was wondering about turning back, before he disappeared and left, not even giving Gaara and me another glance.

I turned my eyes away from the door and met Yashamaru's surprised gaze.

I simply responded with a smile. Gaara shifted behind me, hiding. I turned slightly and nudged Gaara. My twin simply shook his head, peeking at Yashamaru from behind me. I saw as the surprise look in the shinobi's eyes softened to something else.

"Gaa," I said with playful scolding, "don't be scared. Yasha-san is not a bad man."

Yashamaru's eyes seem to soften even more, if that was even possible. He walked towards us, Gaara tightening around me. But I only smiled reassuringly at Gaara as our uncle came to kneel in front of us. He was wearing his shinobi gear, but his smile was very disarming.

His eyes creased as he smiled at Gaara, "Gaara-sama, Kinnara-sama is right. I am not here to hurt you."

Gaara seem to study him for a while before turning to me and at the nod of my head, he slowly loosened his hold on me, but kept one hand in mine. He stepped to stand beside me and looked up at Yashamaru. Even kneeling, the shinobi was still taller than Gaara and I.

"Yasha-san," Gaara whispered his name quietly, as if tasting it.

Then Gaara did something that surprised Yashamaru and I. A shy smile appeared on Gaara's face as he continued to look up at Yashamaru.

"Yoroshiku onegaishimasu," he said, this time with confidence.

I grinned down at Gaara and then caught the surprised, but content look on Yashamaru's face at Gaara's sudden acceptance of him. The shinobi stood up, looking down at the two of us with clear adoration, even though I could see the hesitance in his feelings for us, on his face.

"Where would Gaara-sama and Kinnara-sama like to do today?"

At this, I blinked at him in shock. Besides me, Gaara jerked with surprise.

"Ki and I are not going back to that room," Gaara asked when I only continued to stare at Yashamaru in shock.

Yashamaru, noticing the shock on my face and surprise in Gaara, was suddenly chuckling. Even as he laughed though, I could see guilt in his eyes. He nodded down at us earnestly, his smile turning genuine again.

"Iie. Under Kazekage-sama's orders, you've been placed under my care." He paused a little, his eyes lingering on me longer than it should have, before turning back to Gaara. "Gaara-sama and Kinnara-sama will be living with me from now on."

Gaara, I could feel his happiness, smiled even more. I only nodded, smiling a little at Gaara's excitement. I knew he hated how alone we've been and the fact that we've only truly lived in one place. Gaara wanted more than anything to see the world…to meet more people.

"Where should we go today," Yashamaru asked again.

Before I could say something, Gaara spoke first, his voice hesitant at first.

"Can…can we visit nee-san and nii-san," Gaara asked quietly, his smiling still wide.

I clenched my fist, my fingers tightening on Gaara's when I heard the question. He turned to me, looking at me with confusion even as his smile stayed in place. But I already knew that his smile was going to disappear soon and Yashamaru did not…disappoint.

A sad look cross his face, more guilt in his eyes. Yashamaru shook his head, kneeling back down to look at Gaara in the face.

"I'm sorry Gaara-sama, but we cannot visit Temari-sama and Kankuro-sama today," he whispered, trying to loosen the blow as much as he could.

But it did not matter. The smile still fell off of Gaara's face. His face scrunched in confusion and hurt. I wanted to hug him so bad, but remained by his side, only comforting him through our hands.

"Nani? Tomorrow then," Gaara asked, a frown appearing on his lips.

Yashamaru's face twisted a little, his smile becoming forced. I watched as his eyes creased together. "I'm sorry Gaara-sama, but Temari-sama and Kankuro-sama are very busy training."

"Training," Gaara questioned.

Yashamaru nodded quickly, guilt still in his eyes. "Hai. They're preparing to become shinobis."

"Why?" Gaara's confused face was so sad and cute at the same time.

"So that they can one day protect Sunagakure," Yashamaru said with a smile as he stood back up. Before Gaara could ask more questions that would only bring heartache to Yashamaru and me, the shinobi said, "Would you like to see your new home?"

At the word 'home', Gaara's shy smile appeared again as he stepped closer to me. He nodded as I beamed up at Yashamaru.

"Hai!"

…

I stood behind Gaara as he entered his new room. Yashamaru was already in the small single bedroom, showing Gaara where everything was. The two were looking over Gaara's sand bed.

I stood by the door, watching Gaara. He was adorable, listening so intently to Yashamaru's words and whenever he looked at Yashamaru, I saw his already beginning adoration for our uncle.

I was happy for Gaara. He had wanted to meet other people so badly. He used to ask me all the time why we were alone, why no one came to see us. I could never answer him. Only distract him.

My eyes strayed passed Yashamaru and Gaara, becoming unfocused as I thought back to moments ago.

The first time we stepped out into the world, Gaara had been amazed by all the sand. I had been too. I have seen the village plenty of times from the screen and pages, but to have stepped foot on it was another thing. We've only lived in a dark room with no windows so I've never had a chance to actually see Suna. But as soon as Yashamaru took us out, my first thought had been:

Sand.

The ground was sand, the buildings made of sand like brick. Whenever the wind blew, grains of sand will collect and blow up from the ground and even tiny grains would fly off of buildings and follow the sand from the street. I had never thought all this sand would be so beautiful, but it was.

Gaara, at the sand, had been excited and whispered to me, trying to not let Yashamaru hear (but I knew he did because of the small grin that appeared), if he could play with the sand later in the open. I had only shrugged, holding his hand tightly.

It was the first time that I had ever felt angry at Suna, the village itself, also.

Walking with Gaara down the street was difficult. Mostly because I was constantly trying to keep Gaara from seeing how everyone was looking at us and avoiding us. Yashamaru, having expected this, kept Gaara busy with stories about the sand and our village.

I think Yashamaru knew that it was only Gaara he had to…keep from seeing too much. I caught how he looked at me once and a while, concern in his eyes at my sudden lack of reaction. However, I kept my smile up, partly because I did not want to alert Gaara that something was wrong and secondly because I wanted to show everyone that Gaara and I were not a threat.

However, the glares, stares, and whispers followed us anyways.

Standing inside of Yashamaru's house now, I was finally able to breathe.

Leaving Gaara with Yashamaru, I turned to my own bedroom, right across from Gaara. I realized that he had probably just got it done. Maybe, Yashamaru had known that he was going to take care of us.

My hands trailed the wooden dresser next to my strange looking sand bed (yes, sand also). But my thoughts wandered back to Yashamaru. It seemed that he had truly been expecting us. So why did he look so shock and surprised when we first met?

My question was answered as soon as I thought them. I took one look at the mirror, confusion in my eyes before I froze, my whole body stiffening.

I had never actually looked at myself before. Hell, there were no reflection or mirrors in that damn room. It was always just Gaara and me. So my appearances had not mattered much to me.

However, my foolish mind had only seen myself as who I was. I kept imaging myself as the way I appeared before. My dreams did not help either because the dreams were memories of me from before.

I had forgotten that I did not look like myself anymore. Not the old me at least. I continued staring at the mirror, before hesitantly, my fingers reached up to touch the reflection of my face.

My small fingers traced my eyes. Violet, the prettiest violet I've ever seen and only seen once before in Naruto. Well, twice because Yashamaru had the same eyes.

The two of us shared her eyes.

I had Karura's—mama's—eyes. Not just her eyes though.

I continued staring at myself, fingers frozen on the cool surface of the mirror.

I finally understood why the Kazekage was so disturbed by me. Disturbed by my voice, my smile, and even my very existence. I finally understood why Yashamaru had that look in his eyes whenever he watched me when he thought I wouldn't notice.

While Gaara was the spitting image of the Kazekage, I was the mirror image of Karura.

I stared at my reflection. I stared at my long sandy-blonde hair, the longest strands reaching pass my shoulders. My fair-skin seem to glow underneath my gaze, sunlight creaking through the small slit of windows on the upper part of the bedroom walls.

When I had first saw Gaara's mom, I had been so surprised. She was so pretty, so kind-looking, different from the psychotic Gaara. I stared at myself even more.

I knew, without a doubt, that when I got older, my looks would only enhance, becoming more of Karura. I would probably look a lot like Temari also, minus the eyes.

At the thought of my older sister, realization crossed my face. I saw as violet eyes widened in the mirror.

When Temari and Kankuro first saw me, the two had been so silent, so quiet. I had first thought of it as just them being uncertain, but I realize now what my appearance would have done to the two of them. They've just lost their mother, a kind and loving woman.

I could only imagine that if Karura loved Gaara as much as she did, she loved Temari and Kankuro the same also and unlike Gaara, the two had memories with her. It was no wonder that they were so unwilling to talk to me and Gaara, not wanting to even look at us.

Gaara, for looking so much like their stern and suddenly transformed father and me, for being the spitting image of the mother they just lost, a mother who they probably loved to only be told she died because of _us_.

Us, Gaara and I.

The monsters that stole their mother.

I did not realize how stressed my thoughts were making me, my eyes not focused on my facial expressions. I did not even hear or feel as Yashamaru came into my room. It was his voice that snapped me out of my thoughts.

"You have her smile," he whispered softly.

My eyes snapped to attention and I quickly got rid of the sad frown and masked my distressed emotions on my face. I was unsure of what he was talking about, wondering and panicking about how he knew that I knew Karura, mama. Then I remembered that he had shown us a picture of her, the same one from my old memories.

Gaara had stared at the picture with confusion, his eyes creased in concentration, as if he was unsure of how to feel. I had only gone to the picture and bowed a little, greeting Karura, calling her okaa-sa as I've always called her in front of Gaara. Gaara being Gaara, followed my lead. Yashamaru had watched the whole thing with mute emotions.

I turned to Yashamaru, my eyes—the same as his—masked.

"I have her eyes too," I whispered. "Like you, Yasha-ji-san."

Yashamaru's face seem to morph from sadness to sudden kind softness, a smile appearing. He really did look like Karura.

He nodded slowly.

"We both do, but you look more like her," he whispered.

I did not know how to reply. I could feel that, in this moment, he was not seeing me, but his beloved older sister.

Luckily, Gaara chose that moment to come in, moving past Yashamaru to hug my side. The two of us, Yashamaru and I, looked at Gaara with surprise. I felt, rather than saw, the strong emotions of distress coming from Gaara.

I returned his hug, fitting him into my small arms. We were the same height, but Gaara always seemed to be able to make himself appear and feel smaller.

"What's wrong Gaa?"

Gaara looked up at me, a frown on his cute face. "Do I sleep alone now?"

I blinked down at him and then it hit me. We had separate bedrooms. I turned to Yashamaru and he must have seen the same question in my eyes. He quickly came to us, kneeling in front of us. I was starting to see that Yashamaru knelt a lot.

He was watching Gaara with kind eyes, "Kinnara-sama and Gaara-sama may still be together when they sleep. It's just that maybe one day when the two of you are older, you would like to have separate rooms?"

Gaara shook his head, pouting a little at Yashamaru. His hold on my tightened. "I…I don't want to sleep without Ki."

His last words were a mere whisper, hesitant that Yashamaru would force us to separate now. I only smiled at Gaara and continued holding him.

"Iie, Gaa," I said with a smile. "We can sleep together! Right, Yasha-ji-san?"

When Yashamaru only agreed, Gaara stepped away from me. His stomach had growled then and with a soft chuckle, Yashamaru had said he would prepare dinner. Gaara, never having seen how food was made, was eager to watch. I had trailed behind, a smile on my face. But thoughts hindered my mind.

I did not want to sleep without Gaara either, his presence always so uplifting after I woke up from my dreams. Gaara kept me tied to this world, his warmth and his sleeping form next to mine, always reminding me that I was not who I was. That I could not change what happened in another life time.

I heard as Gaara asked me something. I broke away from my thoughts and turned to help Gaara as Yashamaru slipped an apron over his head, doing the same for me. I watched as Gaara finger the apron, and heard as Yashamaru chuckled again.

I felt burdened, saddened, by their future. I felt as my fists clenched.

I had to change their fate…but, the question is…

Should I?

…

_That night, I dreamed about him again. This time though, it was not my memory. It was so horrible. It couldn't be real. It had to be a dream, a nightmare. Because it just couldn't be real._

_There had been so much blood, his body so broken and aged. He did not look like my Xen anymore, but I knew he was. The tears that had fallen from his eyes were the same tears I've seen fallen from his face before._

_The pictures in his hands…the familiar letters. It was him. _

_But it couldn't have been him. _

_It just…couldn't._

I woke up screaming, crying his name over and over again into the darkness that held no light.

…

**_~Third Person~_**

The screaming woke them up.

Kaito shot up, eyes snapping to attention. Before he could get up, his wife was already out of bed and out of the door. He followed Hizuki into their son's room, the small boy continuing to cry and scream.

The two of them burst into the room, Kaito's eyes already activated as he looked for intruders. When seeing none, he quickly returned his eyes to normal as he came to sit beside mother and son. Hizuki was holding a shaking Ryuu. The four year old boy was softly whimpering, his sobs no longer audible even as his body continued to shake.

Kaito's eyes softened at his only child. Hizuki was in her early fifties now and Kaito was already pass that into the sixties.

Both of them were too old to have such a young son. The doctors had told them that they would never have children, Kaito being barren due to an accident during a Chunin mission. But Hizuki had married him still, even knowing that their marriage would be a childless one.

But all these years later, a miracle happened and they were given a child. Kagami, Kaito's brother, had been ecstatic for him. Kagami's son was ten years older than Ryuu. It hurt Kaito though, that his younger brother did not survive the war to see the birth of Ryuu.

Kagami's son, Shisui, was now living with Kaito and Hizuki. With the birth of Ryuu, the two were more like brothers than cousins. Shisui would have probably been the first one to comfort Ryuu, but the boy was off on a mission.

Despite their miracle though, being a great joy for the whole family, Ryuu's birth was overlapped by the birth of Hizuki's second great-nephew, the boy several months older only. However, it was already showing that their son was a prodigy, Shisui training him already and many whispers were being spread that Ryuu would follow in the steps of Hizuki's oldest great-nephew, Itachi.

But Kaito could care less. He loved his son and was relieved that Ryuu came into their lives. Which was why he was so worried about his only child. There has been some unrest lately with their son, the usually quiet and happy boy, waking up in the middle of the night screaming.

"Ryuu-kun," Hizuki whispered as she cradled him in her arms, "what's wrong?"

Ryuu hiccuped as he snuggled deeper into her warmth, his small fists clasped around her shirt. He remained silent though, only continuing to cry softly.

Hizuki's eyes met Kaito's with frustrated fear. They've never felt so helpless. The family medic said that there was nothing wrong with him. Kaito's wrinkled rough hands moved forward to smooth Ryuu's hair.

"Son, talk to us. Haha and chichi will protect you now," he whispered as he kissed the spot he had rubbed.

Ryuu's onyx eyes peeked out from Hizuki's chest to look at his father. Kaito's chest squeezed in pain at Ryuu's fear.

"Chichi, he died."

The two adults stiffened, their eyes widening in shock then fear. Hizuki shifted Ryuu in her arms, having him face them even as she laid his head on her chest. Kaito scooted closer, enveloping mother and son in his embrace, but kept enough distance so that he could look down at Ryuu.

"Who did," Kaito asked, his eyes creased in confusion.

"The man," Ryuu whispered softly, "he was…shot by the boy. He died and it hurted."

"Hurt," Hizuki corrected as she smoothed his hair. Her eyes met Kaito's.

Kaito's eyes creased even more, wrinkles appearing. "Is it the same man from before?"

Ryuu nodded as he sniffed. "It really hurt. It hurt me here."

Ryuu covered his whole chest, prodding the small torso and frowning as he looked back up to his parents.

Kaito's eyes softened as he took Ryuu's hand in his bigger one, letting the two of them out of his embrace. "Does it still hurt?"

Ryuu shook his head.

"Then it's okay then?"

"Iie," Ryuu shook his head again, "the man died. He died and it hurt."

"Who is he," Hizuki asked her son patiently as she shifted him again on her lap so she could face him.

"He," Ryuu's eyes furrowed in confusion. "I don't know. It hurt like it was me. The man, he was sad, haha. So sad. I don't want to be sad."

"Well, you won't be," Hizuki whispered as she placed a kiss on his head. "Haha and chichi will always be here to protect you. Shisui-kun will be there too."

"And if you are sad, you can just tell us and we can make it go away," Kaito whispered as he also kissed Ryuu.

"Haha and chichi can?" Ryuu's eyes grew big. "How?"

"With kisses and hugs," Hizuki said as she demonstrated each one, causing Ryuu's face to screw up in disgust.

"Haha!"

"And with tickles," Kaito added as he proceeded to demonstrate on both of them, causing Hizuki and Ryuu to fall on the bed, both trying to escape from Kaito's tickles.

Laughter reigned into the night within the Uchiha compound.

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><p><strong><em>Until Next Time...<em>**

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><p><em>AN: "Hajime mashite. Yoroshiku onegaishimasu" is a form of greeting. Translate to: "How are you? I'm glad to meet you."_


	4. Small Acts and Small Changes

_Disclaimer__: If I owe Naruto, I would not be on Fanfiction, you would be reading it through publication!_

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><p><em><strong>"Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that." –MLK<strong>_

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><p><strong>4 - Small Acts and Small Changes<strong>

**_~Kinnara~_**

I scowled as I stared at the burnt sata andagi, a traditional Japanese sweet similar to what my old world would consider a doughnut. Many of the Narutoverse things had eastern origins so finding out from Yashamaru that Temari's favorite treat was sata andagi, I had to try my hand in it. Of course, I should emphasize on the try.

Yashamaru, who had patiently allowed me to fry the dough, fought the smile trying to form on his lips. Gaara, who had also been helping, looked from his plate to mine with blinking and confused eyes.

"Ki, can the andagi be black too?"

I turned my scowl to my twin's plate and felt myself glower even more.

Gaara's had turned out perfect. The dough had turned a golden brown, stacked upon one another in their glazed glory. I turned my glowering eyes to Gaara who, at my angry expression, blinked and suddenly he looked so dejected that I sighed.

I hugged him, knocking my head against his, smiling despite my bitterness at his cuisine skills, "No, but Ki is bad at cooking. But Ga's are good!"

At my compliment, Gaara lost the dejected look, his eyes lighting up and he smiled at me and Yashamaru. The older shinobi had watched the scene, his smile finally breaking free.

As Yashamaru repeated my words (ouch) he handed one of Gaara's finished product to my hand. "We shall try it again, if you wish Kinnara-sama."

I scowled at our uncle, taking the andagi and shoving it into my mouth. At the awesome sweetness and deliciousness of it, I forgot about my anger. Oh wow. As I continued chewing, grabbing one more andagi, Gaara and Yashamaru were already preparing the ingredients for the next patch.

I grinned through a stuffed mouth at Gaara's appearance as Yashamaru retrieve the eggs and mix. Gaara's auburn hair was held back by a cloth (which I had put there because I just couldn't help it. I mean, it's not every day that you can turn a chibi Gaara into a Rosy the Riveter bandana wearing cutie). From our earlier fight, which Gaara and I won, Yashamaru and Gaara were still messy, flour on Gaara's cheeks and apron with Yashamaru still having whiter than usual hair.

I sighed, looking at the plate of andagi. I shoved one more into my mouth before heading off to help Gaara and Yashamaru.

Time to implement operation: Killing them with Kindness.

…

Gaara stood uncertainly behind the open door. He looked from me to figures of our older siblings training. Temari and Kankuro were still unaware by our presence. Yashamaru stood ahead of us, speaking softly to the shinobi guarding the door. Our uncle casted concerned glances at us before turning his attention back to the shinobi.

I smiled at Gaara. I shifted the box of andagi onto my right hand, holding it against my chest as I lifted my left palm towards Gaara.

"It's okay Gaa," I whispered, feeling as the sand around us also swirled at Gaara's feet, trying to comfort him.

Looking at my hand, he nodded, his eyes suddenly determined, but still shy, as he took my fingers into his. Holding my hand, he squeezed it slightly. I simply smiled at him and when Yashamaru turned back to us, we were ready.

"They are not expecting us, Kinnara-sama and Gaara-sama, but we can meet with them today."

Yashamaru smiled reassuringly at us and led us forward, the two of us following behind closely. I felt as Gaara stumbled a little when Temari and Kankuro finally realized they had company, the two stopping in their spar to stare at us.

"Temari-sama, Kankuro-sama," Yashamaru greeted as he bowed at them, almost kneeling.

"Yashamaru," Temari replied stiffly as she avoided looking at Gaara and I. Kankuro simply nodded in acknowledgement as he frowned at us.

Temari and Kankuro were dressed in simple ninja wear since they were only doing light combat training in the afternoon. I stared at Kankuro because I was still surprised to see him without his face paint. He really looked like Gaara and the Kazekage. But I snapped out of my daze, remembering why we were here.

"Nee-san, Nii-san," I greeted with a cheerful smile. It wasn't fake either because I truly did like the two, especially knowing how loyal they would one day be to Gaara.

Temari, at the joy in my voice, turned to us in surprise. Even Kankuro, who I knew did not like children, was surprised at my smile and happy demeanor. Gaara, next to me, bowed his head and shyly, but sweetly, repeated what I said with his adorable voice.

Temari, snapping out of her surprise, turned to Yashamaru with a frown on her lips.

"Why did you bring them here, Yashamaru? Kankuro and I are training," she began, but then I moved forward, an identical frown on my face.

I handed the box of andagi to Gaara as I did my best to fume at Temari.

"Don't yell at Yasha-ji-san, nee-san. Gaa and Ki just wanted to," I paused when Yashamaru turned to me with a smile. I bit my lips and pouted.

Temari and Kankuro, at my outburst, had turned back to me with surprise, Temari cocking an eyebrow at me with Kankuro scowling at my impudence most likely (that or he just liked scowling). She kept her eyes on me even as she listened to Yashamaru.

"Please, excuse us, but what Kinnara-sama means to say is that she and Gaara-sama wanted to see the two of you and wish Kankuro luck at the academy tomorrow as it is his first day," Yashamaru explained kindly and patiently.

I nudged Gaara and slowly, he stepped forward, the box of andagi outstretched towards them. The two, who looked more shocked than they really should be, simply stared at Gaara and I. When they simply kept staring, Gaara's face fell, the shy smile disappearing as he hesitantly pulled back. I was unsure of what to do, but then I quickly grabbed the box and shot forward, shoving the box right into Temari's hand.

My speed must have caught everyone off guard because suddenly, six shinobi had appeared next to me, two heading for Gaara, but Yashamaru had already moved to protect Gaara which left me…with four shinobi glaring at me.

Temari, who had at first numbly held the box, suddenly realized what had happened. With a frown, she snapped at the guards.

"Stand down! She is not trying to hurt us," she growled even though the last part came out more hesitant than she had wanted.

Kankuro, rolled his eyes, arms crossing as he eyed the box. Gaara, who had watched the scene with confusion and fear, called out my name. I turned to him, smiling reassuringly. Yashamaru quickly moved forward, inspecting me.

"Are you alright, Kinnara-sama," he asked as he checked my arms, "I'm sorry I could not reach you in time, but you shouldn't do things like that—"

"You made andagi for us," Temari whispered with disbelief and with something else, her voice faltering a little.

Yashamaru and I turned to her in surprise.

Kankuro and Temari stared down at the box, their eyes unreadable. Kankuro turned away suddenly as he made a grunting noise. He turned his back to us, arms still crossed, but I could read the tension on his shoulders. I blinked at them in surprise. I rethought her words, then realized something. I grabbed Gaara, pulling him to my side.

Gaara stumbled, surprised at my sudden action. He blinked at me, then turned to Temari with wide eyes before he slowly hid himself behind me. He looked down at the floor even as I grinned up at Temari.

"Gaa made them," I exclaimed proudly. I was not going to add my failed batches…and then Yashamaru opened his mouth.

"Kinnara-sama and Gaara-sama both made you some, but the ones in the box are Gaara-sama's. Kinnara-sama worked hard to make some also, but it was not as successful," Yashamaru added, as if we needed any clearing.

I scowled at him and saw him grin at me with friendly teasing. How could I stay mad at someone with a smile like that? I sighed inwardly and turned back to our older siblings.

Temari slowly closed the lid, her eyes still holding something in them that I could not decipher and Kankuro still had his back to us, shoulders still tense. She looked from Gaara and I before nodding.

"Thank you," she whispered almost hesitantly.

I grinned at her, bowing. Gaara, who watched the whole thing followed suit as he peeked at Temari. Yashamaru smiled hesitantly at Gaara and me. I nodded at her.

"Have fun at the academy, nee-san, and good luck tomorrow nii-san!" My voice echoed in the building as I turned to leave, Gaara blinked between me and them.

"Goodbye," Gaara whispered shyly as he quickly followed me out, Yashamaru bowing as he headed out too.

I refused to turn back to Temari and Kankuro, instead opting out to question Yashamaru when I felt we were far enough from the training grounds.

"Why did they look like that, Yasha-ji-san?"

Yashamaru, who had been walking behind us as a silent sentry, jerked a little in surprise at my question. Gaara nodded as he turned his head towards Yashamaru also. The three of us kept walking through the empty street.

Yashamaru's eyes, which had been open before, suddenly clouded over as he whispered, "I do not know either, but…it may be because your okaa-sa used to make them andagi as snacks too, Kinnara-sama."

At his words, I stumbled a little. I quickly picked myself up when Gaara's small hands shot out to catch me, sand forming around the two of us.

Yashamaru blinked at the two of us in concern. "Gaara-sama, Kinnara-sama."

"Oh," I replied as I straightened, my small hand catching Gaara's as the sand fell away.

I stared down at the ground, my eyebrows furrowing together. Making a decision then and there, I turned my eyes back towards Yashamaru.

"I want to keep making andagi for them then," I said staring up at Yashamaru, my hands tightening on Gaara's.

Gaara watched me before he softly added something. Yashamaru and I turned to him.

"What was that Gaa?"

Gaara's eyes turned back up to meet ours, his lips pursed together as he repeated what he said, "I want to make them for otousama too."

Yashamaru blinked in shock at us. I guess we're, mostly me, are filled with shock today, but I was shocked at Gaara's words too. I blinked at him, slowly nodding. I was going to include that too…but it was even better that Gaara had said it. I felt as my smile widened, my cheekbones hurting.

"Yea! We can make some for otousan too!" Yashamaru opened and closed his mouth, uncertainty on his face, but I ignored it and instead, I began dragging Gaara back home. "We can start now!"

After a minute, I realized we were missing someone.

I stopped, scowling at Yashamaru. "Yasha-ji-san, stop being so slow!"

Yashamaru snapped out of his shock as he nodded, quickly following us as I began forward again. I was too happy, at the outcome and at Gaara's desire, to care at how empty the street was.

* * *

><p><strong><em>~Third Person PoV~<em>**

Temari stared down at the andagi, Kankuro sitting next to her, scowling at the ground. His hands wrote in the sand as he threw glances towards the box in Temari's lap. The two, after another hour or two of sparring, had decided to take a break.

And were now staring at the unexpected treat.

"I bet they're not as good at okaa-sa's," Kankuro said angrily as he looked away again.

Temari made no reply as she sighed, setting the cover aside as she slowly took one into her hand. Kankuro, at Temari's action, paused in his writing. Biting his lips, he watched as Temari slowly took a bite. At her expression, the eyes widening a little as she slowly began to chew, he hesitantly reached out and took one too.

Watching as Temari finished her first and took a second, Kankuro shoved the one in his hand into his mouth, pausing as he tasted it. Blinking in surprise, Kankuro swallowed. He stared at the andagi in his hand, unsure of how to feel.

He was lost in thought until he heard the sound of sniffling. Surprised, Kankuro looked up. He watched as Temari picked up her third one and felt his chest constricted as something wet fell from her eyes.

Temari sniffed, her left hand furiously wiping her sudden tears away as she began eating the third andagi, staring down into the box as if it would give her answers. Kankuro, no longer scowling, looked down at the andagi in his hand. He blinked back a couple of tears too as he slowly took another bite, remembering andagi made from hands of a woman long gone.

In silence and reminiscence, the two sand siblings finished the andagi box and after a few moments of silence, continued sparring.

…

**_The Next Afternoon_**

Kankuro and Temari stopped short as they noticed the all too familiar box at the foot of the door to their training room. Temari, as she approached, slowly picked up the box. There were two notes.

Kankuro peeked from over her shoulder, eyes narrowing at the sloppy and childish hand-written note on the box.

_Hope today went well nii-san! And don't over work yourself today, nee-san!_

_From Kinnara _

But the kanji for the beginning of Kinnara was wrong and then the two continued on to Gaara's neater and nicer message.

_Kankuro-nii-san, Temari-nee-san, please enjoy these. Thank you._

_From Gaara_

Temari and Kankuro shared a look before slowly opening the box. Each took one and slowly ate into it then making a face and forcefully swallowing.

"Kinnara must have made these," Kankuro grumbled even as he finished the one in his hand, already reaching for the second as Temari and he entered the doors.

Temari only nodded as she sighed, reluctantly eating her second. They had ten more to go, but at least they just needed to eat five each. Later on that day, when they had finished and were about to close the box, they noticed a third note on the bottom of the lid.

Temari and Kankuro both deadpanned when they finished reading it.

_Dear Kankuro-sama and Temari-sama,_

_I should warn you that these andagi were made by Kinnara-sama. I hope you two have a good day._

_Yashamaru_

Not far away, a similar message was being read by a man with auburn hair as he sat behind the large desk. Slowly, he set aside Yashamaru's note (which had been placed on top of the other two notes instead of beneath the lid). Next, he pulled the other two notes and took in the two different handwriting.

_Otousan, enjoy these andagi! Gaa and I worked hard on them. _

_Love, Kinnara_

And to the neater of the two…

_Otousama, please enjoy these. I hope you like them._

_From Gaara_

The Kazekage, taking one last glance at the note, closed the lid and turned back to the paperwork on his desk. However, when Yashamaru came to retrieve the box that night, he noticed how empty the box was and behind the cloth, smiled as he bid the Kazekage good night.

…

**_In Konoha_**

Ryuu silently evaded the kunai as he threw his own, watching and anticipating his opponent's dodge and quickly flashed behind throwing more kunai then flashing again to two other angels and throwing more kunai.

His opponent, if he had been anyone other than Uchiha Shisui, would have been unable to block all of the kunais, but it _was_ Uchiha Shisui. Ryuu quickly camouflaged himself into the trees, preparing the hand signals for the fire jutsu, but then Shisui disappeared and Ryuu stopped, closing his eyes.

There was a moment of pure silence, not even the sound of birds or wind. Ryuu waited, hands posed for any form of defense.

When he heard the sudden movement to his left, Ryuu dodged. But then a burst of pain erupted, his muscles suddenly locking and Ryuu fell from the tree, grunting in pain.

Shisui was at the ground in a second, catching the younger boy, concern written across his face.

"Ryuu!"

The four year old boy sat up in his cousin's arms, shaking his head to clear the pain. "I'm fine, Shi-kun."

Shisui's eyes furrowed. "Are you sure you want to join the academy so early?"

Ryuu rubbed his head, his eyes squeezing in pain as he got himself out of his cousin's arms. He cursed under his breath softly as the flashes of pain, images of a world he did not know, cross his vision. He vaguely heard Shisui's concerned words.

Instead, he tried catching glimpses of the images in his mind. He used to dream of them all the time, this other world.

Except that the dreams had decided to stop lying dormant. They've crossed into reality also and at times like this, Ryuu knew that it was better to just wait it out. He breathed out silently, waiting for the moment to pass him. He felt as Shisui cautiously sat next to him, waiting for the episode to end.

When the images disappeared, Ryuu sighed. He sat down, dropping heavily onto the ground as he stretched his legs. He hated it, more than anything.

The clan medics were unsure of why these random "seizures of pain" as Uchiha Jakuno called them, occurred. Jakuno was a family doctor, one that had been in Ryuu's part of the Uchiha family.

When his parents had taken Ryuu to see Jakuno, the elder had informed Kaito and Hizuki that Ryuu should not enter the academy due to his illness. It had broken Ryuu's heart and he had been afraid that his parents would agree.

However, at Shisui's and Fugaku's urging, Kaito relented and allowed Ryuu to enroll at the academy early. Fugaku had not wanted Ryuu's gift and potential for the Uchiha clan to go to waste and Shisui did not want Ryuu to lose his dream of becoming a shinobi, which Ryuu always told Shisui when the two trained together. So to help stabilize him, Shisui was Ryuu's designated teacher along with the clan's prodigy, Uchiha Itachi.

But Itachi was on a mission today, having been recently promoted to Chunin at ten. Ryuu was hoping to top that and become Chunin at seven or earlier then graduating at five, maybe even four and beat Hatake Kakashi's record at graduating at five.

Catching movement at the corner if his eyes, Ryuu turned. Shisui had decided to sit next to him, following his stance and lying back on the ground with the younger boy.

"You're only four," Shisui said softly. "Don't push yourself too much."

"I know," Ryuu replied, "but I want to work alongside you!"

Shisui smiled, reaching forward to rub the boy's head. "I think you'll go very far in life Ryuu. Don't worry about it."

"But," Ryuu's eyes frowned, "I just feel this urgency to complete everything."

Shisui nodded slowly, smiling. "Alright, if you can graduate at four, I'll throw in a favor and have them test you out for your Chunin exams at five and if you pass that, I'll help you prepare for the Jonin and even have Itachi help."

Ryuu's grinned. "Deal"

The two shook on it, laughing. Although, Shisui's laughter was softer and less happy than the younger boy. He watched Ryuu carefully. The boy had great potential, learning at a faster pace than even Itachi had at that age. Every move, ever exercise, ever task, it was like his body, even if it was not built for it yet, followed the movements and the poses with ease and comfort.

Shisui would say that Ryuu's body was built to become a shinobi, a soldier.

However, his mind was what worried Shisui. Ryuu was a child who grew up with loving parents. Unlike Itachi, who graduated young and early, he was not built with the same ability to distance himself from his emotions and his own opinions. The boy grew up with loving parents and was very sheltered.

Shisui only worried that Ryuu was too young to start experiencing the shinobi world.

* * *

><p><strong><em>Until Next Time...<em>**

* * *

><p><em>AN: And we get closer to the massacres...that of the Uchiha clans and of Yashamaru._


	5. Dreams

**Disclaimer**: Naruto does not belong to me so go sue someone else.

* * *

><p><strong>"If the world we live in now is a dream, would you even want to know what reality is." - Unknown<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>5 - Dreams<strong>

**_A Year Later in Suna..._**

**_~Kinnara~_**

I turned upward, my eyes scanning the horizon among the sand dunes. I wrapped the blanket around me tighter, shivering. The desert got so cold when the sun was not out.

Gaara shifted next to me, his head slowly falling forward as he fought sleep. I turned to him, hand grabbing his. As my fingers touched his, he jerked awake.

Eyes widening, he quickly turned to me. "Is the sun rising?!"

I laughed at his expression, my fingers tugging his slightly. "Iie, not yet. You have to stay awake Gaa-kun!"

I turned to my other side and scowled. With a flick of my hand, sand sprayed over Yashamaru's sleeping form. Startling awake, he fell backwards, yelping. I heard as Gaara laughed at my side, his laughter soft and quiet. When Yashamaru sat back up though, Gaara quieted down, his free hand clamping over his mouth.

Yashamaru attempted to scowl at us, eyes sharpening on us. "Was it Gaara-sama or Kinnara-sama?"

I put on my best innocent smile and pointed at Gaara with my free hand. "It was Gaa-kun!"

At my accusation, Gaara's hand fell away, his eyes widening with shock at me. "Chigau! Yashamaru, it was Ki-chan!"

I shook my head, tugging at Gaara with the hand holding his. He was pulled towards me, caught off guard and fell right into me. I grinned at him then turned that grin to Yashamaru as I glomped Gaara.

"Gaa-kun would never lie so," I laughed softly, "maybe it was me."

Yashamaru shook his head at me, moving forward to help Gaara from my glomping. Gaara was moved to Yashamaru's other side, the shinobi's arms snagging him up and plopping him away from me. I pouted. Yashamaru's amused eyes tried to look at me sternly.

"Kinnara-sama, you shouldn't tease Gaara-sama so," he began, but stopped, his eyes catching something on horizon.

From the orange glow in the reflection of his violet eyes, I knew what it was. I immediately turned back to the sand dunes and grinned.

"Look Gaa!" I was so excited that I slipped back to my baby name for Gaara.

I took my eyes off of the sun rise to watch Yashamaru's and Gaara's reaction. I was not disappointed.

I warmed at the expressions on their faces. Gaara was awed, his eyes widening as the sun rose. Yashamaru had a faraway look on his face, a small sad, but happy smile on his face. Both of them stared at the horizon, neither realizing that they looked so alike in that moment.

I leaned back, sand coming up to keep me up as I turned back to the sunrise.

I was happy, yet the nagging fear of the unknown still ate at me. I did not know much about Gaara's past or that of Suna in general. So I tried my best to integrate what I did know. My eyes hardened as I thought about what I knew about Gaara's childhood from my world.

I've been trying to prevent him from ever getting lonely, to keep that part of a Jinchuuriki's life away from him. That made me worried though. That loneliness, that mutual pain, was what created Gaara's and Naruto's strong bond. However, the only alternative was to do the opposite of what I'm doing and _that_ was not happening.

I sighed softly, then I turned my eyes slightly towards my uncle.

His smile was no longer sad. Instead he had turned to Gaara, the older shinobi answering Gaara's questions about the sand and the sun. He looked so happy. Both of them, I mean.

I was glad. I knew that Yashamaru unable to move on from losing Karura, and when he tried to love the son that he knew Karura loved, he couldn't do it without guilt because a part of him was truly afraid of Gaara. Thus, why he had been willing (even if reluctant) to have tested Gaara out that night and ended up committing suicide.

However, that was when there was only Gaara. There's me now and from what I've seen, Gaara was not unstable or even threatening. Gaara's instability had probably stemmed from being so lonely, physically, and psychologically. The loneliness, the pain at being rejected over and over again, at being hated without understanding why, led Gaara to become so susceptible to Shukaku.

Yashamaru could not fill in that gap for Gaara which led to Gaara feeling so alone and thus to his fall towards Shukaku. Gaara could not fill the gap that Karura left in Yashamaru, which led to Yashamaru holding onto the village more than to his love for Gaara. Yashamaru, in my opinion, was afraid of Shukaku and because of that fear, was so willing to destroy Gaara.

That instability, in Gaara and in Yashamaru, led to that night which led to the Kazekage deeming Gaara worthless and thus turned Gaara into a monster.

I continued watching the two, uncle and nephew interact. I also realize how real the threat of Shukaku is. And I can only guess that was the only reason why Yashamaru did what the Kazekage wanted. Yashamaru, no matter how much he loved Gaara, loved the village more. Which meant he followed his Kage, even if Yashamaru hated him, even if it meant that it was the same Kage that sacrificed his sister.

In this retrospect, Yashamaru fell short in my eyes.

I am bias, very much so, knowing how Itachi valued Sasuke even more than Itachi valued Konoha. But I did not hold it against Yashamaru. No, instead, I held him highly for it even though it pained me. But it was also the reason why I was trying so hard.

I had to break Yashamaru's love for the village. Destroy his loyalty with the village with his love for Gaara…and for me. This time, it won't just be Gaara that he would have to try and kill; it would be me too. I was right that as I got older, I only started looking more and more like Karura. I was only seven, but I could tell already.

I knew that Yashamaru was onto me. He doesn't know the full truth (ha, imagine if he could figure out my secret), but I knew he sensed that I was far more mature and knowing than Gaara. He did not treat me the way he treated Gaara. He treated me with less care, less sensitivity.

He was kind, very much so and very adoring, but he was not as worried about me. I think he sensed that I already know about Shukaku.

At times, he would treat me like a child around Gaara, but besides that, he never did. He respected me and I know he love me, but Yashamaru knew there was something different about me. So I knew that in a sense, Yashamaru would (hopefully) listen to me.

I was not going to let what happened happen. I will save the two of them, even if it meant saving them from themselves. I blinked out of my thoughts as Gaara and Yashamaru stood up.

I tilted my head towards Yashamaru, my uncle smiling down at me, peace in his eyes.

"Thank you Kinnara-sama, for reminding me that the sunrise can be very beautiful here in Suna."

I smiled up at him and saw as his eyes widened a little.

Ah yes, my smile. Karura.

I did not mind that most of the time, who he saw was Karura. A part of me loved her, the other part awed. She was so powerful that even after death, she was still able to protect her son, still able to have two men love her so fiercely, and two children still longing for her. My thoughts were broken by Gaara.

Gaara leaned forward, one hand outstretched to me. "Let's go home, Ki-chan."

I stared at his hand, my lips curling into a smaller, but even happier, smile. Home…

"Hai, Gaa-kun."

I took his hand, and let Gaara lead me forward, Yashamaru, next to us. I prayed that I could keep this peace, this future.

...

I pushed Gaara on the swing, openly laughing as Gaara's nervous voice told me to be careful.

Yashamaru had taken us to the park today. At first, Yashamaru had encouraged us to go out by ourselves, to accustom ourselves to Suna, but I knew better.

I had told Yashamaru that we would rather have him along and each time we went out, I made sure to bring Yashamaru.

Today was the fourth time he's taken us here. It was the first time that he's left us alone though. Today, the Kazekage had requested his presence. I had a small inclination of what our father would want to discuss with Yashamaru. My thoughts were broken though as Gaara yelped a little as I pushed him too high.

Over my laughter, more laughter traveled to our ears from across us. Gaara, I noticed, turned his head towards the other kids. I did not need to see his face to know that he was looking longingly at them.

"Why don't they let us play with them?"

"Because," I began softly, "they…I don't know Gaara."

I never knew what to say to him when he noticed people ignoring us. Although, I'm beginning to think that Gaara has always known. It's just that he was confused by it. Gaara, at my response, became even more silent.

I stopped pushing him. Instead, I slowly pulled him into a hug from behind.

"It's okay Gaa," I whispered, using his baby name, "Ki and Yasha-ji-san will play with you."

There was a moment of silence, Gaara simply leaning into me, before he nodded, slipping off of the swing. Before I could say more though, the both of us watched as one of the kids kicked the ball upwards.

Something cold came over me as I watched the ball land on top. I froze.

I heard as little kids complained and asked about how they would get the ball down. I remained frozen, Déjà vu overcoming me as I stared at the sand that formed around the ball.

Images of this scene from my past life flickered. My past life…I was not Kinnara of the Sand.

No I was—

_I'm Xen, what's your name?_

—the ball was carried down. The kids, some exclaiming in surprise, suddenly grew quiet when they watched the ball land in the arms of Gaara. My hand grabbed for my head as my vision suddenly blurred, but even so I heard them, voices from the children, voices from my past.

One voice whispered, "You're…"

I tried to stop Gaara, but—

_It's Seng, like sing, but spelled X-E-N._

—Gaara, with a small and shy smile on his face, looked down at the ball then at them. Gaara, poor Gaara. He didn't deserve this—

_They say I'm cursed. You should stay away from me._

—he lifted the ball towards them. "Here…"

But their words. Kids can be cruel.

"It's Gaara…"

"Gaara of the Desert…"

"Run!"

And then like the anime, like the manga, the kids starting running and like the anime and the manga, I watched as unspeakable, irreversible, emotions of pain and hurt, cross Gaara's face. I reach out for him—

_Let me go. You deserve better._

—the kids, they kept running.

"Wait!" Gaara, was that Gaara's voice?

They just kept…running…as if…Gaara was…a…

"Don't leave," Gaara cried out and just like that, with his voice sounding so hurt, the sand reacted. Arm like things suddenly appeared around the kids that were too far behind, their feet being dragged as they fell.

Something hot and nasty pulsed within me then—

_Blood soaked his hands as he continued to pound his fist into the wall, crying despairingly into the ground._

—I stared in horror at Gaara. The expression on his face, of anger, and pain…I ran forward.

"Gaara!" But then that same feeling, overcame me and I trembled in shock at it.

Shukaku? My memories? Why, why now—

_His eyes looked pass me, as if I no longer meant anything to him._

—I saw the rage, the stark and raw pain on his, their, faces. Their?

I snapped out of it, forcing the memories of Xen away.

Xen was gone, I was dead. I was not that woman, that girl anymore. I was Kinnara. I was Gaara's twin.

Gaara. I needed to help Gaara. I cried then, tears falling.

I knew he was lonely, I knew he was not stupid. He saw the faces, heard the whispers, saw the fear. Felt it. I had tried to protect him, kept trying to keep him away…when all along, I had only been ignoring Gaara too.

"Help me!" one of the kids yelled, their voice coming mutely to my deaf ears as I struggled to understand what was happening.

I saw something in him changed, as if something snapped. I heard, no felt, Shukaku's hatred, its killer intent, and then the sand flew towards one of the kid being held hostage by Gaara's sand. I finally found my voice, but my legs remained frozen.

"No!"

And then blood splattered onto the floor, Yashamaru making it just in time. There was a second of ugly silent, sand dispersing.

"Gaara-sama! Please, calm down," Yashamaru panted out, arms bleeding, blood streaming down his face.

My head starting shaking, no. I just let it happened. I could have stopped it!

I could hear Gaara's shaken voice, his mind coming back from Shukaku's rage, from his own pain, "Yashamaru…?"

My Gaara, my poor Gaara. He looked so scared, shaken. Guilt crawled across his eyes. He looked around at the kids, at the blood. There was a moment of dead silence, horror and terror across Gaara's innocent face.

He suddenly curled up, falling to his knees, wrapping his arms around himself. And started crying. Small sobs came from him, the sound so broken and afraid.

My heart twisted. I had not heard Gaara cry in so long.

I was there before Yashamaru, my arms wrapped around him, rocking the two of us. Gaara's small arms clung to me, his sobs falling into my chest. Yashamaru stopped in his tracks, watching us, blood covering his face.

"Shh," I whispered, my voice tearful as I cried with Gaara. "It's okay Gaa. It's going to be okay."

Please, don't let me be lying, I prayed.

I turned my head and met Yashamaru's eyes. They were not looking at me, only at Gaara. And they were filled with concern….but I saw it: the doubt, the fear.

I knew what was going to happen next…and I knew…I had to…I had to stop it.

* * *

><p>~Kumo~<p>

Sarutobi Asuma usually was a calm and much laid back guy. In that manner, Asuma and Hiruzen were the same. The God of Shinobi was a fear to be reckoned with, but on the deeper level, he had always been a good father and good man.

The only problem was that he was too compassionate…and at times, that compassion can be his downfall. Especially as the Hokage where you must choose, love the village or the love those in the village. Which was why, if Asuma was to blame anyone for their current situation, it would be his father.

Grunting, Asuma slammed his dagger into the back of the shinobi to his side, but he was expecting the puff of smoke as the man's clone turned into a log. Breathing out heavily, he lunged backwards to avoid the kunais that were thrown at him. He knew that the only reason why the assassins were being so cautious were because of the gray haze still around them, his ash pile burning jutsu still intact.

Casting a quick glance towards Kurenai, he was relieved (not surprised) that she was holding her own. To everyone, even him, Kurenai disappeared, flower petals suddenly appearing around her opponents. He knew that she was only using a genjutsu and would probably perform the tree binding genjutsu upon the unsuspecting shinobi.

Feeling as his opponent move towards him, Asuma raised his chakra infused daggers to block the Kumo shinobi. From the corner of his eyes, he watched with helplessness as the six year old Chunin dodged and parried the ongoing attack of his opponent. Uchiha Ryuu was a genius, powerful, fast, and one of the best shinobis Asuma had seen for someone his age since Hatake Kakashi. Speaking of Kakashi…

_Damn it, where are you_, Asuma wondered as he threw his opponent backwards, the man flashing away then reappearing behind Asuma, and Asuma once again met him blade for blade. Their S-rank mission into Kumo under the guise of helping a Kumo "merchant" back after the Chunin Exam had taken the turn for worst. Asuma, even as he maintained his focus on the battle, could still remember the day his father had revealed to him the true objective of the three-man mission "C-rank" mission to Kumo.

_"**What**," Asuma asked quizzically, the cigarette in his mouth dipping._

_"You and Kurenai will accompany and protect Uchiha Ryuu as he escort the contractor back to Kumo. You will travel with him and upon reaching Kumo, gather information on Kumo and find our missing informant."_

_"Wait, what do you mean by 'missing'," Asuma snapped, the cigarette trembling between his lips. "Isn't Gai the informant placed in Kumo?"_

_Hiruzen sighed, hand reaching upwards to hold the pipe between his lips. Kurenai's nose crinkled at the two Sarutobi men as they smoked in the room. She was tempted to crack the window open, but remained in the background, head held high and eyes straight forward. Few would willingly speak against the God of Shinobi…but then not most could say that he was their father either and Kurenai knew that things between Asuma and Hiruzen were not doing well lately._

_"Might Gai has failed to report back to Konoha since his last report a month before the Chunin Exams," Hiruzen said gravely, finally revealing the secret to Asuma and Kurenai._

_Asuma stiffened, Kurenai's eyes closing as she clenched her fists. Gai, she thought. Asuma stared at his father, mouth opening and closing before he growled._

_"He's been missing for **that** long," Asuma breathed out angrily, "and you're telling us now?!"_

_Hiruzen's hand fell back to his side as he stared at his son sternly. "Asuma, Gai is on a top S-rank mission for Konoha as an inside informant. His whereabouts and his mission are not to be discussed at will, even to friends and family."_

_Asuma stiffened even more, Kurenai's eyes snapping open. Before Asuma can speak, Kurenai beat him to it even._

_Lifting her head to study the Hokage, she asked, "What exactly was Gai searching for in Kumo and how does this relate to sending Uchiha Ryuu on an S-rank mission in the guise of a C-rank?"_

_Asuma turned at her voice, his cigarette burning brightly as he inhaled it before breathing it out through his nose. Hiruzen straightened slightly, hands folding behind his back as he turned his head towards her._

_"Before I disclose this information, the two of you must accept the mission."_

_Asuma frowned, his jaws clenching slightly as he stuffed his hands into his pocket. Kurenai's eyes snapping onto Asuma. She nodded even as Asuma shook his head. Asuma grabbed the cigarette stick from his mouth._

_"Ryuu-kun is too young," he began, but Hiruzen cut him off grimly._

_"He is," he said softly, eyes softening, "but Gai's safety and well-being may be resting upon this mission. The contractor will have no other, but Uchiha Ryuu as his escort. The fact that he has allowed for two more shinobis had been a condition we had to negotiate with him about."_

_Asuma seemed to remain silent, thinking, but Kurenai, watching him, knew his answer before even he did. Gai meant too much to them and they knew that Hiruzen would never purposely put a child, no matter what rank, into harm's way for no reason._

_"Fine," Asuma finally snapped as he threw his cigarette away, flicking it into the garbage can. "We'll accept. What's the mission?"_

The mission: find evidence of Kumo's breach of their alliance with Konoha.

Less than a year ago, Kumo was involved with the attempted kidnapping of Hyuuga Hinata. The kidnapping had been thwarted only after killing a Kumo shinobi. However this had angered Kumo. When war was threatened and Konoha could not find evidence that it was Kumo itself and not a random rogue organization in Kumo that had kidnapped the Hyuuga heiress, there had to be a sacrifice to quell the war.

Hizashi Hyuuga offered himself in his brother's stead and the lost was still a blow to Hiruzen. Because of Hiruzen's inability to prove Kumo's involvement and that the Kumo Nin's death was justified, Hyuuga Neji had become an orphan.

Since then, Might Gai had been sent to Kumo in hopes of finding more about Kumo and their intent towards Konoha's kekkei genkai. But Gai had gone missing and then the "merchant" was leaked by Gai's last report as a leader with ties towards what happened.

Only a month, Asuma, Kurenai, and Ryuu along with ANBU Operative Hatake Kakashi left Konoha on the mission. Asuma and Kurenai had been hoping for a little more time to pile their evidence against Kumo for trying to steal another of Konoha's kekkei genkai. However, the two barely made it in time to help Uchiha Ryuu from the ambush.

Teeth clenching, Asuma swiped at the shinobi's throat, his body lurching sideways to avoid the kunai as he made the swipe. He quickly glanced over at Ryuu and much to his surprise, watched as the boy beat his opponent, sharingan activated.

Uchiha Ryuu, during the beginning of their mission, came clean about his lack of experience in real combat. From what Asuma remembered the boy had done exceptionally well during the Chunin Exams, quickly outsmarting and overcoming his opponents. However, the Chunin Exams were different from an S-rank mission.

Damn it, Asuma growled as he dodged the shinobi again, but even as he did so, he watched with wide eyes as Ryuu made his first kill. The boy's eyes, which were hesitant, had closed shut as he plunged his kunai into his opponent's throat. Blood spurted out and with warm blood pouring down his hands, Ryuu opened his eyes. Asuma knew right away that something was wrong when the sharingan pinwheels suddenly began to spin, black and red swirling. Ryuu blanched as pain suddenly crashed against his brain. Screaming, he clutched at his head, his opponent's blood painting his hair crimson.

Asuma and Kurenai, hearing his scream, fought even harder. Kurenai finally revealing herself and binding her opponent into her jutsu. Asuma only increased his attacks, anger driving his blades now. Ryuu felt as tears formed, the pain only increasing by the minute, his whole body suddenly seizing up as his head exploded in agonizing pain. He heard the scream of an animal, as if it was being burned alive.

He wanted to yell for someone to put the creature out of its misery. Then he realized that it was him, not an animal that had screamed. The young boy writhed on the ground. He could not even sense as Kakashi finally arrived, the ANBU reaching him first.

Kakashi stiffened as he pulled Ryuu off the dead shinobi. Tears of blood were streaming down Ryuu's closed eyes, the boy's face scrunched in pain. His whole body was taut and shaking violently.

He called out his name, eyes casting quick glance upwards as he felt Gai's war cry. When Kakashi finally found Gai, the two instantly returned back for Asuma's team, Gai revealing about the ambush. Kakashi's teeth clenched beneath his mask as he shifted the boy to his side, a firm hand keeping him there even as his body thrashed with the seizure.

Kakashi softly called out his name, ignoring the battle knowing that with Gai's help that the other two will be fine. Instead, he focused on the boy…so young. Younger than even he had been. Eyes softening, Kakashi simply watched helplessly.

Ryuu continued to scream, fists clenched. Images flashed across his mind. Blood, so much blood, but the images were moving too fast for him to understand. There were metal things, flashes of bright light as bombs went off, giant metal moving monsters that consumed everything in its paths. The images would change though, faster and faster.

When the images turned to a girl, woman, something in between as she kept changing in his eyes from a small child to a young woman, Ryuu could not understand. He did not have time to either as he suddenly blacked out from the pain, darkness enveloping him.

Kakashi saw as the boy's body, still seizing up, stopped moving, falling unconscious. Kakashi felt as Kurenai flashed to his side, kneeling besides him and he moved away, allowing her to take care of the kid.

"Why is he on this mission," Gai whispered as he looked down at Ryuu, frowning, "they wanted him. Why would you allow him to be on this mission?!"

"We haven't heard from you in months," Asuma mumbled out tied up the unconscious shinobis. "And we needed to find more about this guy. Can't have him coming back to try and kidnap another kid from the Hyuuga or Uchiha clan. Ryuu-kun was the best for this mission."

Gai's eyes closed as he sighed. "He is full of youth that one, too much. I hear he is a prodigy?"

"Hai," Asuma muttered as he stood up, kicking the shinobis to make sure they were still unconscious, "I think you'll like the kid. He's got talent and a knack for taijutsu, maybe even better than his genjutsu."

Gai's eyes opened as interest flashed across his eyes. "Ah, I sensed that his power of youth was more than the eyes could see. It is not every day that one sees an Uchiha skilled in taijutsu when they have genjutsu."

Asuma opened his mouth to reply, but it was Kurenai's voice that called out.

"ASUMA!"

All three men stiffened, Kakashi shooting back to Kurenai's side. The three men stiffened when they realized what had Kurenai so panicked. Ryuu had no heartbeat.

"Fuck," Kakashi let out, Gai and Asuma too worried to care at Kakashi's uncharacteristic cussing.

"His heart," Kurenai cried as she desperately, but calmly, tried to pump his heart, green chakra surrounding her hands. "Kakashi!"

Kakashi flashed forward, ignoring the two men as he took over for Kurenai, as she titled Ryuu's head back, breathing into his lungs. Asuma and Gai stood back, their face solemn as Kakashi and Kurenai fought to keep the young Uchiha alive.

Kakashi's eyes hardened, his teeth clenching.

"Kurenai, get away!"

The kunoichi snapped to attention, quickly following his command. Gai and Asuma stared at Kakashi, no use to hearing him sound so angry and desperate. Kurenai's hands trembled as she clenched them. The three watched as Kakashi placed an ear against Ryuu's chest.

Growling, Kakashi straightened and began trying to bring the boy's heart back. Not even thinking about it, as he pushed down, he sent a small jolt of electricity through the boy's body, painstakingly aware that if he lost even an ounce of concentration, he would fry the boy's heart and body. Gai's eyes widened.

"Kakashi," he whispered, hands lifting as if to stop his rival, but he held it back. His eyes squeezed shut as he turned his head away.

"Ryuu," Kakashi whispered as he kept pushing downward. Up, down, up, down. "Ryuu!"

Kakashi's eyes clenched in pain and despair as the boy's heart remained dead. Damn it, damn it, damn it! He was too young, too innocent, and too damn important to die now.

Sending one last jolt of electricity through the boy's body, everyone let out a breadth as they heard the first beat. Kakashi faltered, his eyes widening. Ryuu's whole body jolted then, forcing Kakashi's away. Asuma and Gai moved forward then, holding the boy's body down as Ryuu, still unconscious, gasped for air. He struggled to move, but the two men gently held him in place. Kurenai was there in an instance, her warm hands, turning green as she placed them over Ryuu's head.

"Shh," she whispered as she put him back to sleep, forcing his body to slacken into deep sleep.

Kakashi was breathing out heavily as he stared at Ryuu. His fists clenched. Asuma fell onto his knees, resting his head against Ryuu's side as he breathed out with relief. Kurenai stared down at the boy's face, his features creased in pain.

She had calmed his nerves to calm his body, but his mind…she was not sure how to stop pain that she could not see. She ran a hand through his hair. Kakashi turned away, unable to continue looking at him and he instead turned back to the Kumo assassins, first to move away.

It was too close…it had been too damn close.

"Damn," Asuma whispered as he clenched Ryuu's shirt in his fingers. "Damn."

* * *

><p>Xen<p>

_I was sleeping, sleeping for so long. But I was also always dreaming. It was so strange. I swear that I was dreaming of the Narutoverse. It was strange._

_In my dreams, I was someone else, a little boy. An Uchiha. But I had no control, at least not consciously. When he ate, I ate, when he cried, I cried. I felt nothing at his first kill, so similar to mine._

_I did not know, but I sensed that the two of us were closer than we expected. But what got to me was that he reminded me of Su._

_Su, my little brother, the third youngest of our siblings of seven. Su's dark hair was short like the boy's, except that the boy smiled like I did and laughed like I did. We even pouted the same. At a closer look, I would even say that the boy was a replica of me when I was five. But he's not me._

_However, it couldn't be Su either._

_The last time I saw Su, I was seventeen, Su fourteen. Su had been dressed in a black suit as he laid in his coffin next to the rest of my siblings. There were seven coffins in total…the seventh was that of my mother. She took my place._

_Seven coffins and the seventh should have been me._

_The pain, the grief, came back as I remembered how the seventeen me had cried that day and from then on, I never stopped crying, even when the tears could no longer be seen._

_At that particular memory, my dream world shattered and pain erupted. I cried out, but so did the boy. It hurt so much. To remember everything, everyone. Dreams were not meant to hurt._

_Why, why couldn't I just wake up from this nightmare?_

* * *

><p><em>Ryuu was swimming and swimming. Everything was dark. Everything was bright. He couldn't stop swimming through the darkness and the light. He could hear a faint voice of an older man, but Ryuu couldn't reach him. He just couldn't, but Ryuu was going to try anyways…<em>

Asuma continued standing in his spot even as Kakashi, Gai, and Kurenai swiftly left, each one of his friends casting a glance at him. Kurenai, as she passed him, hesitated. Asuma felt as she lifted a hand towards him and felt as she skimmed her fingers on his arm. He refused to look at her, staring straight ahead.

When the three were gone, Hiruzen turned his full attention to his son. Lips pierced, Hiruzen laid his pipe away. "What is it?"

Asuma closed his eyes, breathing out slowly before reopening them. He finally turned his head towards his father. "I've decided."

Hiruzen's body stiffened, his face flinching a little at the sternness in his son's voice. Sighing, Hiruzen turned away, facing the village as he watched it through his window. "And?"

"I am going to join the Twelve Guardians," Asuma said without emotion as he looked at his father's back.

"And what of Konoha?"

Asuma's fists clenched. "Protecting the Fire Daimyo is important, more important than staying here."

Hiruzen sighed and turned back to him. "Are you sure that is what's most important?"

Asuma glared, his eyes narrowing at Hiruzen. "I know what is important, but do you?"

Hiruzen's face hardened at his question. "Asuma…"

"How can you tell me that Konoha shinobis, the children of Konoha, are important when you willingly sent one into a battle he was not prepared for," Asuma seethed as he took a step forward. "I refuse to stay here when this is what it means to protect Konoha…not if it means having to watch someone as young as Ryuu-kun face death. It was bad enough for Uchiha Itachi, but that was because we were at war. How can we do the same during a time of peace?"

Hiruzen's eyes fell at his words. The Sandaime knew what had occurred, having just heard the report from all four and he would receive Ryuu's report when the boy awakened. The Uchiha clan was not pleased at harm done to their prodigy and that strife was not helping the strained relationship. Hiruzen sighed softly as he looked back at his son.

He had no words, no excuse. He could spout words about how Uchiha Ryuu was a Chunin, a shinobi. That it was a shinobi's job to die for his village. But even Hiruzen was unable to say those words to Asuma. He had hoped that by assigning Asuma to be Ryuu's team leader, his son will realize that the most important people he should protect were the ones here in Konoha and not the Fire Daimyo. That the true 'king' were the children of Konoha.

However, it seemed to have only backfired. Hiruzen knew that it was a dangerous mission. He had not expected it to turn out the way it did though. So instead of trying to stop Asuma, he simply asked one question.

"Are you sure," he whispered.

Asuma nodded, finally looking down. "The mission was accomplished. You no longer have to worry about Kumo stealing Konoha's kekkei genkai. I am leaving tonight."

"So soon," Hiruzen mused as he picked his pipe back up, placing it between his lips.

Asuma nodded, eyes still casted downwards. "If you are right and the true important people are here in Konoha…view my time away as my way of training to better protect the people here. I," Asuma paused, looking back up. "I will return."

Hiruzen nodded. He breathed out some smoke before turning away again. Asuma also turned away, heading out the door. But before he left, he heard, "You are a man now, Asuma. You're decisions are your own."

Asuma's fingers clenched on the door knob as he hesitated. He almost turned back, but instead closed the door and began walking away. There was nothing left to be said.

…

That night, Ryuu's dreams were different. He stirred a little on the hospital bed. His eyes were creased, face showing emotions of distress. His finger clenched on the bed sheets.

Usually, he would see replicas of the man's life or just images of the world that would always cause him pain in the real world. But tonight, Ryuu's dreams were different.

_Stiffening, Ryuu looked down at his hands. He blinked in surprise. He looked around him and sure enough, he was in a room, a large T.V. in front of him and couches around him. To his left was a huge window that showed off massive towers made of glass and metal. Eyes widening, Ryuu rushed to the window, awed by the foreign towers, but he hit one knee against the low table in front of the couches._

_"**Ow**," Ryuu groaned as he rubbed his knee, hopping on the other, but then he crashed into the wall and fell backwards onto the couch._

_Blinking Ryuu scowled as he quickly stood up, but not before hearing a dry chuckle._

_"**Whoever brought me to the Narutoverse sure has a sick humor**."_

_Ryuu blinked, sitting upright as fast as he could, falling off the couch in his haste though and he winced as he hit the side of his head against the same table that his knee had banged against. He heard a deep sigh and the sound of moving feet._

_"**They had to make me an Uchiha. Just because we're both Asian with dark hair and dark eyes**." There was a pause as another dry chuckle filed the room. "**Man, she was right**."_

_Before Ryuu could get up or understand what the voice was saying, two pairs of strong arms lifted him weightlessly and sat him down on the couch he had just fallen from. Blinking, Ryuu stared up at the big figure, his eyes turning into circles as he opened and closed his mouth._

_"**Y-you're**," Ryuu couldn't form words. Another dry chuckle responded to his shock._

_"**It's good to finally meet you Ryuu-kun**. **They call me Xen.**"_

* * *

><p><strong><em>Until Next Time...<em>**

* * *

><p><em>AN: And the climax...begin._


	6. Sleeping

**Disclaimer**: WHY IS THIS EVEN HERE! I MEAN IT'S _FAN_FICTION! But I don't own Naruto.

* * *

><p><em><strong>"I've left the ones I once cared for in the shadows so they can't see my face..."<strong>_

* * *

><p><em><strong>6 - Sleeping<strong>_

_**~Kinnara~**_

Gaara and I stood in front of Karura's photo. I was glad that in this scene, Gaara held no knife. He was not trying to hurt himself.

"Gaara-sama, Kinnara-sama," Yashamaru said with a small smile that did not reach his eyes as he entered.

Gaara took one glance at Yashamaru before quickly looking downwards. "Yashamaru, I'm sorry."

Yashamaru looked surprise, blinking at Gaara and me before realizing what Gaara was referring to.

"Ah," he looked at his bandages and lifted up his injured arm, "this? It's just a scratch."

Then Gaara asked _the_ question.

"Do wounds hurt?" He looked guiltily back up at Yashamaru.

"Just a little," he said with a genuine and kind smile, "it will heal quickly, though."

There was a moment of silence, I watched them closely. I knew the speech and I knew I needed to let it happen. I remained in the background, next to Gaara.

Gaara watched Yashamaru a bit more before finally asking, "Hey Yashamaru?"

"Yes?"

"What does pain feel like?"

Surprise crossed Yashamaru's face.

Gaara continued. "I've never been hurt before, so I was wondering how it felt."

Yashamaru actually looked stumped, his face turning away as he looked thoughtful. "Hmm. How should I explain this…"

He trailed off and then looked back at Gaara.

"It's painful and unbearable. Like when a person is shot or cut. He becomes very ill at ease and he can't think normally." He suddenly scoffed a little, rubbing his neck. "I can't explain it well, but simply put, it's not a very good condition to be in."

Gaara's face seemed to tear up a little. I saw him eyeing Yashamaru's wound.

"Yashamaru…"

"Hai?"

His next words, made even me pause (although I already knew it was coming).

"Then do you hate me, Yashamaru?"

Something akin to sorrow came over Yashamaru's face at hearing Gaara's question. He was clearly distressed that Gaara would ask that question. His hand lowered. I saw the painful expression cross Gaara's face, my hand sneaking into his, our palms clinging to each other. Gaara looked down at our hands, his face losing the hurt expression a little.

"People hurt each other and get hurt during their lifetimes. But it is difficult to hate another."

Those seemed to be the right words, Gaara flashing a genuine and happy smile at Yashamaru.

"Thanks, Yashamaru! I think I understand what hurting is, now."

"Really?" Yashamaru looked happy for a bit, but at Gaara's sudden downfall look again, he went back to looking concern.

"Maybe," Gaara looked down at our hands, "I'm injured too, like everyone else."

Then slowly, he lifted his free hand to his chest.

"It always hurts here. I'm not bleeding," he whispered softly, sadly, "but my chest hurts here."

At Gaara's words, I saw Yashamaru's face fell, guilt and pain in his expression. I remained silent, waiting for Yashamaru to continue. There was no knife this time—

Never mind.

Slowly, Yashamaru (damn shinobi) pulled a kunai out from his pocket—although, why a shinobi with an apron on be needing a kunai for, I don't know—and slowly held it in his hand. Coming to kneel in front of Gaara and me, he suddenly slit his finger, Gaara's eyes widening in surprise, a distressed sound escaping his lips.

Blood seeped through the slit. Yashamaru looked fine though, uncaring of the wound. He lifted his finger up to show us.

"Flesh wounds bleed, and they may seem painful," he began, "but as time goes by, the pain eventually disappears. And if you use medicine, the wounds will heal even faster." He lifted up the kunai with his unwounded hand. "But the tricky wounds are the ones in your heart. Those are difficult to heal."

"A wound of the heart," Gaara questioned.

"A wound of the heart is different from a flesh wound," Yashamaru replied softly, eyes closing. "Unlike a flesh wound, there are no ointments to heal it, and there are times when they never heal."

At those words, Gaara's whole expression fell, his fingers squeezing mine, a search for comfort. Yashamaru noticed the action.

"There is one thing that can heal a wound of the heart though," he added. "Its troublesome medicine and you can only receive it from another person."

As he said this, he looked over to Karura's picture. I followed his gaze. Gaara remained focused on Yashamaru.

"What? How can I heal this…?" He finally turned to where we were both looking, noticing how both of our attention were turned away from him. He gaze at Karura's, mama's, photo.

"The thing that can heal a wound of the heart is," Yashamaru turned to us, the famous turn of his head, "love."

Gaara turned back to him, my eyes remaining on the photo.

"Love?"

"Hai," Yashamaru replied happily.

Gaara looked thoughtful. "Like…how Ki-chan loves me?"

Yashamaru smiled softly. "Yes." He turned back to the photo, Gaara following his motion. "Love is the spirit of devoting yourself to someone important and close to you. It is expressed by caring for and protecting that person. Just like my nii-san and Kinnara-sama."

I turned to him when he said my name, surprised. Yashamaru met my gaze with all too seeing eyes. I looked away, down at Gaara's and my hand. Yashamaru turned back to the photo.

"I believe that my sister always loved you two, Gaara-sama and Kinnara-sama," Yashamaru said. "The Shukaku of the Sand is a living chakra being that is usually used for combat purposes. The sand automatically protects you because of love. I believe the will of your mother is inside the sand." He paused for a while, staring with a mute expression at the photo. "My sister probably wanted to protect you two, even after her death."

There was a moment of silence before Gaara's voice broke it. "Yashamaru?"

"Yes?" Yashamaru quickly turned back to Gaara, ready to answer any of Gaara's question.

Gaara's eyes lightened a little. "Thanks back there…for stopping me."

Yashamaru smiled and stuck his bleeding finger into his mouth. The stinging finally getting to him, I bet.

"My pleasure," he replied with a smile, eyes creasing shut, even as his voice was a mere mumble. "Gaara-sama, you are a person who is important and close to me after all."

With those words, Gaara stepped forward, a small shy smile on his lips. He reached forward, taking Yashamaru's injured hand into his own. He had let go of my hand and I followed behind.

Yashamaru looked surprised at Gaara's sudden move, his eyes widening a little as Gaara suddenly put the injured finger in his mouth also. But that surprise was replaced with something else…

Resignation. An empty and blank look that sent me panicking. His eyes suddenly became dull, mute, and lifeless.

"Can you feel my pain," he asked quietly, his voice suddenly matching his eyes.

I clenched my fists a little, hating that look. Quickly, I stepped in. I waited until Gaara took Yashamaru's hand out before I came forward and grabbed it. Before the two can say or do anything, I put his finger into my mouth…and bit down.

Yashamaru yelped, the lifeless look suddenly transforming into shock and bewilderment. Gaara was shocked also, his eye brow-less eyes widening.

"Ki-chan!"

"Ki-Kinnara-sama," Yashamaru stuttered out, his eyes opened wide in shock.

He made no move to get his hand away as I had already loosened my bite, instead, just keeping the finger in my mouth, tasting the metallic blood. Surprisingly, I did not find the situation disgusting at all.

"Why did you bite Yashamaru," Gaara exclaimed, trying to tug his hand away.

After a few tug, I let Yashamaru go. I pouted at the two of them, trying my best scowl at Yashamaru.

"And what about me?"

"What about you, Kinnara-sama," Yashamaru asked earnestly as he wrapped his injured finger around his apron.

"Is Gaa-kun the only important and close person to you," I mumbled as I looked downwards.

I was just using it as a distraction, but I was a little bit hurt too though. I felt left out.

At my question, Yashamaru seemed confused…and then, he laughed. Out loud, with his whole lungs. Gaara and I snapped our attention to him, both of us shocked. We had never heard Yashamaru laugh out loud before.

In moments, after a little more, he was able to control himself and then before either of us knew it, Yashamaru pulled us into a hug, surprising us even more. Yashamaru kept little physical contact.

His next words came out softly, and within it, I heard his tears. "The both of you are my important and close people. I'm sorry Kinnara-sama, I did not mean to make you feel left out."

I shook my head, arms wrapping around him and I felt as Gaara did the same, following my league. The only person who hugged Gaara was me, so Gaara was unsure of how to wrap his small arms around Yashamaru. This only cause Yashamaru to laugh again, not as quiet as his old ones, but not as loud as the one that just happened.

…

When Yashamaru returned to cleaning up dinner, Gaara turned to leave. I knew where he was going, but I asked anyways.

"Where are you going Gaa?" I kinda was surprised too because he had never gone out by himself before. It was always with me or with me and Yashamaru.

Gaara came back to me, a small smile on his lips. "I want to bring ointment to the kids today."

I pretended to be surprise. "Do you know where they live…?"

Gaara frowned, then smiled again. "The sand will tell me."

Oh, yea. I forgot about that little trick with the sand and all. I nodded, then looked outside, as if deciphering the time. I yawned a little.

"Gaa, we should do it tomorrow. It's late."

Gaara's face frowned a little, concern in his eyes. "But what if her wounds don't heal?"

I smiled at him. "She must have someone who care about her like Yasha-ji-san care about us. They have ointment for her."

When Gaara continued looking concern, I pulled him with me towards our room. "Gaa, don't worry. I promise I will come with you tomorrow! Please?"

I added my puppy face. Gaara looked at me and then, reluctantly nodded. "Okay, Ki."

I smile, relieved. "Okay, let's go to sleep." I paused though, looking back to the kitchen. Then turning back to Gaara, said, "Gaa, you go first. I'll come. I need to go apologize to Yasha-ji-san for biting his finger."

Gaara nodded and like a good brother he was, walked to our bedroom. When he was out of sight, I quickly went to the kitchen door, pausing. I breathed out slowly. I needed to do this. Something told me that tonight was the night that the Kazekage and Yashamaru planned it. I knew that there was a slim chance, but after seeing Yashamaru's dead eyes…I knew better.

I've seen those eyes before (and not just because I watched the anime). I remember those eyes on Xen.

Breathing out again, I braved myself and walked into the kitchen. Yashamaru was just about finished, wiping clean the late plate. At my entrance, he turned with a start, and then seeing that it was me, smiled warmly. But again, the smile did not reach his eyes.

"Kinnara-sama," he greeted. "Are you and Gaara-sama heading to bed now? I just heard Gaara-sama leaving though, did I not?"

I was silent, walking slowly towards him. I sat on the table, then nodded towards the other seat. "Can I talk to you, Yashamaru-san?"

At the way I addressed him, the warm smile faltered a little, his eyes becoming cautious. He nodded, sitting down, obliging me. Taking another deep breath, I looked him straight in the eyes. It was unnerving sometimes, how similar our eyes are.

"I want to talk to otousan," I finally breathed out. I waited, watching him closely.

Surprise crossed his face. "Kazekage-sama? We can go tomorrow—"

"Tonight," I cut in. I cleared my throat a little. "I want to see otousan tonight."

Then his face became guarded. "Does it have to be tonight?"

I nodded. "Yes."

Yashamaru watched me a bit more before shaking his head again. When I opened my mouth, he held his hand up. "I promise that I will take you to see Kazekage-sama tomorrow morning. How about when I'm delivering the andagi?"

I frowned. It's not that I don't believe him. It's that I don't know what will happen now. Would he still attempt to murder Gaara or maybe even me? I needed to think fast.

"Can Gaa-kun and I sleep with you tonight," I asked and I knew that he would not be able to say no.

For tonight, I'll rest and begin my battle tomorrow. That night, as I laid next to Gaara, Yashamaru on Gaara's other side, I simply stared at the ceiling.

What must I do to save them...?

* * *

><p><strong><em>~Ryuu~<em>**

_Ryuu shook his head in denial as he looked at the man he's been dreaming of for years. He had never actually studied him, only seen things through his eyes._

_He looked like older version of himself, or what could be the older version of himself. However, there was no way he could be an older Ryuu because Ryuu was still only five and this was a dream._

_Dreams weren't real._

_But the man shared eerily similar features, same eyes, nose, and mouth. Except his build was very muscular and lean, his hair was styled in a long crew cut with the front part of his hair unkempt. Ryuu touched his own haircut, similar to Shisui's (because the two of them got their hair cut together)._

_There was another big difference: the eyes. The man's was a deep brown while Ryuu's was that of the signature Uchiha's onyx ones._

_"**What's wrong**," the man asked softly as he seated himself across from Ryuu, comfortable in this foreign place with his foreign clothes._

_Ryuu had never seen his type of clothes and it looked as if the man had tied something around his neck and it hung down over his chest. He looked back up at the man's face though at his words._

_"**This is not happening. You're only a figment of my mind, a dream—**"_

_"**Really? I could have sworn it was the other way around, but I don't know, kid. I didn't make the rules**."_

_Ryuu's eyes narrowed. "**Is this a genjutsu or is this really my dream? You can't be real and this is not real.**" He squeezed his eyes shut, fists clenching. "**Wake up, wake up, wake up…**"_

_"**Sorry kid, I'd rather not be here either, but I'm kinda getting tired of everything.**"_

_One of Ryuu's eyes creaked open to peer at him. "**You're not real, but I'm going to ask anyways…why do you look like me?**"_

_The man leaned forward, his eyes watching Ryuu intently. "**I don't know. But there is no way this cannot be a dream. Your world is not my world.**"_

_"**Worlds?**" Ryuu's eyes opened._

_"**You've noticed, haven't you? Those attacks that show you pictures and images from my life? They're not exactly from this world.**"_

_"**That can't be!**"_

_"**It is. In my world, your world is fake, an imagination constructed to replicate the world I had lived in.**"_

_"**Wait,**" Ryuu's face scrunched up, "**let's say you're right. Why would they, whoever they are, put you in this fake world?**"_

_The man's lips came upward in a twisted smile. "**To torture me a bit more. I only cared about Naruto,**" Ryuu's eyes widened at the name, "**because she did. I never finished it though because I…died.**"_

_"**Naruto? That name!**"_

_"**Yea, the kid that all the adults told you to stay clear of? That Naruto. You're universe centers around him.**"_

_Ryuu was quiet then as he studied the man. "**Of all things you've said, that is the most insane.**"_

_The man's smile fell as his eyes blinked at him, the owl-like stare unnerving Ryuu._

_"**Look, I just want to wake up. I've been watching your world through your eyes and honestly, I don't believe your world is real—**"_

_"**What, you can't use my own words against me,**" Ryuu said angrily as he frowned at the man. "**I know I'm real!**"_

_"**Do you?**"_

_Ryuu nodded, but the man's next words and action stopped him. Standing up, the man opened his hand towards Ryuu. The younger boy stared at the open palm then back to the owner's face with confusion. The man's face was scrunched up a little, his brows coming together in thought, eyes crinkled at the sides and lips twisted downwards in a small frown._

_"**The world you're living…is my dream. Yet the world I lived is your dream. I've watched your life through your eyes and you've watched mine through yours.**" He cocked his head to the side, palm still outreached towards Ryuu. "**We've never been face to face. I don't know what sparked this meeting. But…I think if you would only take my hand, cross the physical distance between us, then maybe the mental gap will also close.**"_

_Ryuu eyed the palm. "**How can I trust you?**"_

_The man's eyes furrowed together in concentration. "**You shouldn't.**"_

_"**Great,**" Ryuu muttered as he stood up and stared at the palm before looking back at the man. "**I don't understand this.**"_

_"**I don't either.**"_

_"**What if it does nothing?**"_

_"**What if it changes everything?**"_

_Ryuu blinked at his words, fingers clenching and unclenching. He frowned. "**This is stupid.**"_

_The man's frown deepened. "**I know. But you feel it too, don't you?**"_

_Ryuu's frown deepened. "**What do you mean?**"_

_"**The dreams are coming to a stop. Our worlds are coming closer and closer. I used to only catch glimpses of your world and sometimes, I would be outside of your body, but…it's been changing. I feel like I'm becoming you.**"_

_Ryuu's body felt shivers run down his spine at his words. He swallowed down the lump forming in his throat. "**That's impossible.**"_

_The man's face softened. "**You are becoming me.**"_

_"**No, I can't be. I'm Uchiha Ryuu, I'm not you. I'm not a dream!**"_

_The man was quiet, his palm refusing to fall. "**And you won't stop being Ryuu. I think…that if you're Ryuu, then I am also Ryuu. Just like how you're Xen also.**"_

_Ryuu's eyes widened and he shook his head. "**I'm not Xen. I don't know who that is! He's not real.**"_

_But even as the words left his mouth, Ryuu stared in horror as the man suddenly began shrinking, transforming. His hair got longer, his eyes darker, the muscles and height disappearing, and soon Ryuu was staring at a mirror. However, the outstretched palm and the suddenly too understanding eyes, remained the same._

_"**I think I'm starting to understand this,**" Ryuu's voice came from the man's, boy, whatever he was, lips. "**I am you and you are me. But you've forgotten…no, not forgotten. No, it's something else. You've been fighting it; the rebirth, I mean. It's why you've been getting seizures.**"_

_Revelation crossed his—Ryuu's?—face._

_"**Yes. That explains it. But, it's a no wonder you're fighting it so much.**"_

_His palm fell and that made Ryuu even more scared. Ryuu stiffened as the other Ryuu—the man or was it boy, Ryuu didn't know anymore—suddenly began walking towards him. There was a strange calm and understanding look in his eyes._

_"**I understand now, Ryuu…no. You're not just Uchiha Ryuu. You're Xen too.**"_

_"**S-shut up,**" Ryuu said, stuttering._

_He felt everything go cold as the other Ryuu came closer and closer. Ryuu wanted to punch that look off of his face. It was too understanding, too calm…too sad._

_"**I don't know who Xen is!**"_

_"**Because you don't want to,**" the other Ryuu whispered as he stopped a few feet away from Ryuu. "**You don't want to remember. You'd rather believe that Xen is not you…that Xen is not real because that means Xen's life, Xen's world, is not real either. If Xen was just a dream, it would mean you're just Uchiha Ryuu, not Xen. Xen who lost his whole family to that man, Xen who lost the woman he loved…Xen, the man who turned into a monster—**"_

_"**Stop it,**" Ryuu cried, his hands cradling his head as flashes and images crossed his eyes._

_It couldn't be true, none of it! Ryuu fell onto his knees, hands grabbing at his head as the images—memories—refused to stop showing themselves to him. The room began shaking, everything started falling apart, and the TV broke, the glass on the table shattering. Outside the window, the towers—skyscrapers—started falling apart, glass raining down to the ground._

_"**Stop, please, stop! It's not real. It's not real, IT'S NOT REAL-It can't be! Just STOP!**"_

_Then Ryuu felt as everything really did stop, the world turning into a calming lull. Warm arms suddenly surrounded him, embracing his trembling body. Ryuu's eyes snapped open and he stared into the other Ryuu's chest._

_He could not see his face, but Ryuu could feel as tears fell because they also fell from his eyes. His lips trembled then, his eyes creasing as the truth dawned on him. He sobbed into the other Ryuu's chest._

_"**But it is real, Xen,**" the other Ryuu, the old Ryuu, tightened his arms around the boy that had just suddenly turned into the man he once was. "**And it's time to wake up.**"_

_And Ryuu—Xen—did._

* * *

><p><strong><em>Until Next Time...<em>**

* * *

><p><em>AN: He's finally awake. _


	7. Reality

_**Disclaimer: **_There is nothing to disclaim since I owe nothing except for my OCs...Not Naruto stuff.

* * *

><p><em><strong>"When uncovering the monster hidden in my closet, I found it was me..."<strong>_

* * *

><p><em><strong>7 - Reality<strong>_

_**~Xen~**_

Ryuu—no, I awoke with a start, my body jerking so hard that the IVs were pulled out. I winced, blinking at everything around me. I blindly grasped for the bedside.

_I stumbled, my voice stuck within my throat as I slipped on the crimson liquid. No, please no. No, no, no. _

I breathed out softly, and with no sense of my surrounding, scanned the hospital room. I coughed, my body shaking as more memories flooded over my consciousness. I felt as sobs erupted from my throat.

_I wrapped my arms around Su, his head lulling back in my arms. I tried to scream, but I couldn't find my voice. Why, why?!_

I tried to breath, but the only thing that came out were silent screams.

_I found the small bodies in the kitchen, my tears finally falling, my screams shaking the whole house as I held my youngest brothers and sisters. _

Pain flashed across my head, my eyes squeezing shut as I gave a muted cry.

_I stood next to her grave, staring down at the letter her parents just gave me. I felt nothing…there was nothing left. _

Falling off the bed, I felt as my body hit the floor, but that pain could not match the ones in my eyes, my head, and my heart.

_I screamed into the wall, tears falling as I smashed the bottles, one by one. Blood, my blood, splattered across the table, over the shattered glass._

Why, why was I remembering? Why did I **_have_** to?

_I felt as arms grabbed me, trying to stop me, but all I wanted…all I wanted was to die. _

I finally found my voice, my body curling into a fetal position as I continued screaming into the room, into my pain.

_It hurt…it hurt so much. Please, make it stop. I grabbed the gun and pointed it to my head. Please. _

My eyes clenched shut, not realizing that the lights had suddenly been turned on and that bodies were suddenly surrounding me.

_"They're my children," he whispered brokenly, his tears wetting the side of my face, "how could I leave them to be orphans in this world without my protection?"_

I felt as warm kind hands picked me up, but they could not break my void. I was stuck within my past, unable to do anything, but continue to thrash against the arms, screaming and crying. It was not their arms that I wanted. Not the warmth I longed for.

_She held me, her cries, tears for me, swallowed by my pain as I held onto her, trying to just keep her warmth in my arms. I did not want to let her go. Please, don't let me lose her too._

I gave a scream of anguish, howling like an animal.

_I slammed the car door. Why, why did she insist on going away where I could not protect her? All I wanted was for her to stay here, where I knew she would be safe. I sighed, running a hand through my hair. I'll apologize next time. I clenched my fists around the object in my pocket as I pulled out of her driveway, my fingers smoothing the small box. _

_Next time. _

Please…just make it stop.

_I stared down at pills in my hand. These were supposed to make me happy, keep the depression, the grief, and the pain at bay. But…I watched as the pills flew against the wall, scattering around the floor. I stared at them. These pills could not fill in the hole, could not bring them back. _

_I just wanted them all back. _

_My family…and my girl. _

I felt voices surround me, people shouting, but all I could hear as I felt them insert something into my arms, were **his** words.

_Why…why did I just not simply die?_

The tears that ran down my face touched my lips, the taste of the metallic substance coating my tongue.

_You're cursed…not my son, not mine to kill. _

Even as the darkness claimed me, silencing my screams, it could not silence the memories and the pain.

_You're a curse, Xen…and as a curse, you'll only continue to kill those around you. _

...

_**~Third Person~**_

Shisui stared unseeingly down at the ground, his hands fisted at his side. Itachi sat next to him along with Sasuke. The younger Uchiha looked between Shisui and Itachi, his eyes creased in worry at how silent the two were.

Shisui, while not as stolid as Itachi, was a quiet guy, but Sasuke knew that Shisui had a humorous and kind side, smiling more than Itachi ever would. But even Itachi's silence was unnerving. The three sat in Ryuu's room. When Team Asuma had returned from their mission yesterday, Ryuu had been rushed to the hospital. Then as night fell, Ryuu had received another seizure, the attack so bad that it had called for five medics to prevent the boy from hurting himself.

He's been in a coma since. It was already the afternoon.

Sasuke peaked at his friend, his lips quivering. Itachi, noticing Sasuke's sudden down casted emotions, poked his brother gently on the forehead, smiling softly to reassure him in action if not in words. Sasuke, at his brother's action, looked back down at his hands, his frown lessening.

Itachi gazed back at Ryuu then looked at Shisui from the corner of his eyes. Even though the two were only cousins, Itachi knew that Shisui and Ryuu were more. They were brothers.

When Ryuu had been born, Itachi had saw a reflection of himself when Sasuke had been born in Shisui. For Shisui, especially with the death of his parents from the Kyuubi attack, Ryuu's birth had been a miracle and a sign of better days.

Plenty of times, Itachi and Shisui would exchange stories about Ryuu and Sasuke as babies and to their individual training of their little "brother." Shisui referred to Ryuu more as a brother than a cousin. Looking back at the young shinobi (too young, in his opinion, but it would be hypocritical of him to say it out loud); Itachi could understand what Shisui was going through.

The door opened, the three boys turning to it. Kaito and Fugaku entered, the Uchiha head taking one glance at Ryuu before turning to his sons.

"Sasuke," he whispered as Kaito entered and he remained at the door, "your mother wants you to go home and rest."

Sasuke's lips pierced together as he looked over at Ryuu. He wanted to stay with Ryuu though...then warm fingers clutched his shoulders. Startled, Sasuke turned his head upwards. Itachi's warm eyes met his.

"Do as father says, Sasuke. If Ryuu wakes up, I will come get you and if he doesn't, I will pick you up today and we can come back here."

At his words, Sasuke nodded and stood up. As he passed Ryuu's still body, Sasuke hesitated. His fingers reached for Ryuu's, the tips touching the back of Ryuu's cold still hand. "Wake up soon, Ryuu-kun."

Fugaku's eyes softened at Sasuke when the boy turned to his father. Fugaku stepped aside as Sasuke walked pass him. He shared one glance with his oldest, Itachi's eyes meeting his briefly before looking away. Fugaku's frown deepened. He sighed and shook his head, turning to Sasuke as the young boy called for him. Kaito closed the door as Fugaku left.

Shisui rubbed a hand over his face before beckoning for the chair Sasuke had been in. "Take a seat."

Kaito nodded, his graying hair having gained several silver strands over the night. He sat down and slumped slightly, his eyes closing.

"Is Hizuki-sama at the compound," Itachi asked polietly as he turned to Kaito. Kaito nodded as he opened his eyes.

"Yes. She finally agreed to pass shift to us."

Shisui nodded, his hands falling to his side. He stared at Ryuu. "What did the doctors say about his eyes?"

Kaito stiffened, his eyes hardening. Itachi's fists clenched slightly his face tightening before relaxing as he turned his eyes to Shisui.

"As we suspected."

At his words, Shisui turned sharply towards Kaito. "What? Truly...but, but." Shisui shook his head, hands grabbing at his hair. "He's too young. It was just one mission...his first."

Itachi's eyes sharpened onto Ryuu, his eyes observing the young boy. Already? "Are you sure it is the Mangekyou?"

"Yes," Kaito whispered softly. "Itachi, Fugaku cannot know of this."

At his last words, Itachi stiffened. "What?"

"Fugaku must not know of Ryuu's Mangekyou."

Itachi agreed, but he was curious. "Why?"

Kaito turned his eyes to Itachi, the onxy orbs grave. "Think about it, Itachi. Shisui's Mangekyou is known only because he used it during a mission in front of others. When it first appeared, there were disputes over it. As a shinobi, Shisui may die any time. Fugaku has already stated he wishes for the eyes to be preserved and transplanted as we know now that it can be done such as Hatake Kakashi's case. I will not have Ryuu under the same burden."

Shisui nodded as he leaned back in his chair, his eyes closing. "He is right. Ryuu's Mangekyou must remain between the three of us and we will explain this to Ryuu when he awakens."

Itachi was quiet as he turned back to Ryuu. Itachi was unsure of what to think. Uchiha Ryuu was a prodigy, through and through. His skills will probably even surpass that of Itachi, especially with Shisui's as his mentor. Now with the Mangekyou, there is no doubt that Ryuu has surpassed him. Just a few more years and Itachi knew that Ryuu will be a force to reckon with. However, he was curious. What powers would Uchiha Ryuu's Mangekyou hold?

He turned slightly to Kaito. Kaito's Mangekyou, something Itachi had found out only when Shisui had revealed it to him last night when Shisui and Kaito had suspected Ryuu's mangekyou, was still a mystery to Itachi. Kaito had kept his eyes a secret for years, not even his father knew. What could Kaito possibly be hiding? Was it something similar to Shisui's Kotoamatsukami?

Only time will tell.

…

_**~Xen~**_

I awoke on the hospital bed, the softness of it cushioning my back. I stared up at the white ceiling, blinking my eyes.

Gingerly, I sat up, spotting Kaito...my father asleep on the chair across from me. I paused in thought. I was Uchiha Ryuu now, not Xen. Uchiha Kaito is my father. I felt as everything inside of me froze, my muscles and my heart stuttering.

I had a _father_. I studied him a bit more. A father...

Stretching, I could not help, but hate the lack of muscles and strength in my arms and legs. My body was still too young to fully develop the muscles and strength and agility I was used to. But I could feel and know from memory of this life that this body had more stamina than my old five year old body from before.

I was just happy though that as Ryuu, even without the memories, I had known to begin training early.

But still. I felt slow and sluggish from the five year old body, but rather it was from the lack of intense exercise or from having been under bed rest for five days, I did not know. Slowly, I slipped out of the bed, stumbling a little from fatigue.

Breathing through my nose, I straightened and took a step forward, then another. Everything felt strange, yet it didn't. I had spent so long living as Ryuu, suppressing who I once was, that to combine the two again was strange, even stranger than landing myself into the Narutoverse.

I stopped by the sink as the mirror came into sight. I paused. I almost laughed. I felt so stupid. How did I, as Ryuu or as the dream Xen, not realize that I was Xen? Being reborn as an Uchiha did not change my features at all.

"You really do have a sick humor," I muttered at whoever decided to put make me an Uchiha in this life time. "Just because we're Asians…"

I scoffed, rubbing my smooth jaw, the baby fat still lingering. I had grown a stuble back in the old world. It was strange to be so bare. But at least I knew that my body would lean out more within a few years and with a bit more training. I ran a hand through my thick hair, eyes narrowing. I needed a cut. Why did I allow myself to follow Shisui's style? It wasn't bad, but it wasn't me.

"Ryuu," Kaito's voice said with fear. He must have realized I was missing from the bed.

I turned back him, taking in his familiar features. I was Ryuu still, so I did hold love for him, but now I was also Xen...so it was kind of strange to meet his eyes, eyes that held clear adoration for...me.

"Chichi."

Kaito stood up, his eyes watching me closely before coming over and suddenly hugging me. My instinct was to flinch from the hug, but this body…was too used to the affection shown by the older man. Like a reflect, I returned the hug, my smaller body being engulfed by Kaito's larger one.

After a moment, Kaito let me go, leading me by the shoulder, back to the bed. "Ryuu, you should not be up. You've been resting for a day now."

"It's only been a day," I repeated, surprised.

Kaito's eyes sharpened at me, causing me to pause. How did I act like Ryuu when I was Ryuu? But his next words made me sigh in relief.

"You're not stuttering?"

I nodded slowly. Of course not. I only stuttered to begin with because of the seizures. But now that I was no longer fighting the memories...I acted surprise.

"Hai," I began, "it seems so, chichi."

When Kaito only responded with a sudden smile, I knew it was going to be okay. Kaito helped me up, his arms lifting me and I allowed him. He was my father and even though I felt like a grown man, the memories and the life I had as Ryuu could not be erased. I loved this man and I knew he loved me. I was not acting, I was Ryuu.

"I'll send word to haha," Kaito said as he rubbed my hair fondly, "and I'll get the doctor. Shisui also asked to be notified when you awoke so I expect he'll be here sooner than even Hizuki."

He smiled once more at me and my heart stuttered. It's been so long since I've seen eyes with such warmth directed at me. I could not help but smile in return and for once, it was not forced or a lie. This was going to get some used to. As Kaito disappeared, my smile softened. I stared at my hands.

This world...this life...was so different.

However, I felt as my smile fell, there were things about this world that I already knew.

What was I going to do now…especially about the massacre.

* * *

><p>...<p>

* * *

><p><strong><em>~Kinnara~<em>**

I watched as Gaara packed the andagi into the boxes. Today it was his turn. Yashamaru was washing the dishes, his back to us. I stared at him a bit longer before turning back to Gaara. He was carefully placing the andagi into place, concentrated at the task. I smiled at him.

"Gaa-kun," I began, beginning my morning teasing of Gaara. I felt, rather than saw, as Yashamaru sighed. "You work so hard to prepare andagi for them! What about me? You don't love me?"

I put on my best pout as Gaara snapped his head towards me, eyes widening adorably. Guilt crossed his face as he stopped what he was doing. He quickly casted the andagi aside and came over to me, hugging me. "Iie! It's not like that Ki!"

I returned the hug, squeezing Gaara even as I laughed (giggled?) and buried my head into his neck. "I'm just joking Gaa! I know you love me."

Gaara, realizing that I had been teasing him, pulled away and frowned at me. "Ki-chan!"

I smiled at him warmly and poked him in the cheek. He pouted at him, removing my finger. Yashamaru came over and tapped my forehead.

"Kinnara-sama please refrain from teasing Gaara-sama," he chided softly even as he smiled at Gaara and I.

Gaara sighed before turning back to packing the andagi. I turned away from Yashamaru's smiling eyes to Gaara as he finished packing the andagi for Temari and Kankuro. I grabbed it, Gaara looking at me once before shrugging and continuing to pack the Kazekage's box.

I turned back to Yashamaru just as he took off his apron. I shoved the box into his arms as he turned towards Gaara and I, startling him as he stumbled backwards a bit.

"Kinnara-sama, what," he began, but I began pushing him into the living room, calling back to Gaara, "I'll be right back, Gaa!"

Yashamaru's protest died on his lips as I looked up at him with my most serious expression. His lips pierced together into a thin line as he stepped away from me. Taking one glance back at the kitchen, he focused on me.

"What's wrong?"

I studied him carefully, observing his eyes. They looked better than they did yesterday, but they also looked tired. He had not slept well last night. I knew because I stayed up with him.

"Please, deliver these to nii-san and nee-san first," I said as I continued looking into his eyes. "Then you can take Gaara and I to the otou-san."

Yashamaru stiffened a little as he looked at the box in his hands then to me. "If I asked you what for, would you tell me?"

I shook my head. "Please?"

There was a moment of silence between us before he sighed. Nodding, he turned to leave, then he paused. I watched him as he hesitated. I smiled softly at him when he turned back to me. At my smile, he froze.

"It'll be okay Yashamaru. Ki promise."

My words seem to do something to him because he slowly returned my smile. "Hai, Kinnara-sama."

He left, leaving me alone in the living room. I watched after the door he had exited for a little while longer. I felt as my heart pounded in my ears, my whole body shaking a little at what I was about to do, about to tell Gaara. I sighed. Let's do this.

Turning around, I reentered the kitchen just as Gaara finished packing the box. He looked up at me, smiling. I returned the smile as best as I could, but it must not have been because Gaara's smile fell.

"What's wrong, Ki-chan?" He came to me, hands already reaching for mine.

I stared at his hands for only a second, hesitating for only half of that second, before taking it. His warmth clambered over mine, my body greedily sucking it into myself. I looked up into his eyes and was shocked to find that my eyes were tearing up. Gaara panicked then, his free hand reaching up wipe my tears as he stepped closer to me.

"Nani? What happened Ki? Is Yashamaru okay?"

I nodded, my hand grabbing for his as I wiped my own tears away. I pulled Gaara with me to the living room and onto the couch. The picture of our mother smiled at us from its place on the stand. I looked over at it.

"Gaara," I whispered softly, "I'm going to talk to otousan today. Do you want to come?"

"Otousama? What do you want to talk to otousama about, Ki," Gaara asked.

"About us…Yashamaru…and Shukaku."

I turned back to him and noticed how his eyes furrowed together. He turned to me and met my eyes. "Shukaku?"

I placed a hand on his chest, then brought his hand to my chest. "The demon inside of us."

I felt as he stiffened beneath my hand, his eyes growing wide. "Demon? Is…is that why nobody likes us?"

I nodded. "Yes. It's why everyone doesn't like us."

Gaara seem to ponder my words, eyes dropping down to his hand on my chest. My hand fell from his, but his hand remained on in place. I kept my hand on his chest too.

"But why is Sh-shukaku in us?"

This was going to be the hard part. My fingers pushed his chest a bit, adding pressure to it.

"Because it makes us stronger…it makes us something to be afraid of," I whispered as his eyes rose back to mine.

"They're all afraid of us…aren't they." It wasn't a question.

My jaws clenched a little. "Yes. They are."

"Even Yashamaru?"

"A little bit, yes," I whispered. "But he loves us more than he is afraid of us." Or at least, I hope.

"Otousama…nee-san and nii-san. They love us too?"

"Yes," I whispered softly, my hand moving away from his chest to clutch at the hand on my chest. "They do. They're just very much afraid. To them, our existence means only one thing: Shukaku. But we can teach them, can't we? Like we taught Yashamaru to not be afraid of us?"

"Teach them," Gaara whispered the words back, his fingers clutching mine too. He stared down at our hand. "Will they still be afraid of us if we teach them? Will…they talk to us like Yashamaru talk to us?"

"I don't know, but we should still teach them, right?"

Gaara looked back up at me. "Hai, we should."

I smiled at him and he returned the smile. Awww. I laughed softly as I glomped him, wrapping my arms tightly around him. For once, Gaara did not complain.

"Gaara," I whispered into his ear, "I'm sorry. So sorry."

"What for," he muttered against my clothes as he let me hold him.

"I should have told you about this a long time ago. If I did, yesterday would not have happened."

"It's okay Ki," Gaara replied softly as he pushed me from him. I pulled back and met his eyes as he smiled at me. "It's like Yashamaru said, Ki. You were just protecting me! But," he paused a little and looked downward. "I want to protect you too, Ki. I want to protect Yashamaru a-and...I don't want to hurt anyone anymore."

I stared at Gaara. All this from a kid? I nodded my head slowly, tears finally falling from my eyes. He was so young. And so good. I pulled him back into a hug, this time burrowing my head into his chest because I did not want him to see the tears.

Gaara was such a nice and sweet kid. I can't believe that no one was willing to give him a chance, no one was willing to protect him. But I will protect him. I will make sure he never walks down that path of hatred.

…

I felt the eyes on us as we walked through the building with Yashamaru leading us. The box of andagi was in Gaara's arms as he walked beside me, the two of us right behind Yashamaru. I glanced over at Gaara and was glad to see that he was also ignoring the stares, some glares, and walking forward with his head tall. Yashamaru talked quickly to the desk attendant before she let us in, her eyes creating holes on my back as the door closed behind us.

Gaara handed the box to Yashamaru as the Kazekage looked up from his paperwork. His hat was off, his face fully exposed to us. He frowned as he saw us. He took a quick glance at Gaara and I, no emotion revealing if he was surprised to see us or not. Instead he nodded at Yashamaru as he placed the box on his desk.

Gaara's hands reached for mine as the Kazekage turned his attention to us. I smiled at Gaara reassuringly, turning my eyes back to our father. Yashamaru suddenly got into his shinobi pose and stared straight ahead.

"Kinnara-sama and Gaara-sama have something they wish to speak to you about, Kazekage-sama," Yashamaru said stiffly as he placed his arms behind his back.

The Kazekage blinked in surprise even as his stern face remained the same. He turned sharp eyes to us.

"What would you like to speak to me about? If it is about training, we will begin that soon enough."

"It's not about training, otousama," Gaara spoke up much to everyone's surprise.

Well, Yashamaru and the Kazekage made no inclination to being surprised, but I sure as hell was. I turned my eyes sharply to Gaara. Before Yashamaru got back, I had already explained what I was going to say. It was hard to reveal what I knew…without revealing what I knew. But it was hard to explain to Gaara about Yashamaru's and our father's plan on "testing" our hold on Shukaku and sure enough, Gaara had been very upset. But I had been able to get him to understand. But what was he doing…

Gaara seem to read my thoughts because he squeezed my hands once before saying his next words.

"Ki and I…want to talk about Shukaku."

"Shukaku," the Kazekage snapped, his eyes seeming to narrow and sharpen onto us. I saw that Yashamaru had stiffened also. "What about Shukaku?"

"That," Gaara turned to me slightly, lips piercing as he looked downwards. He whispered softly, "that you wanted to t-test my control. Is…that true, otousama? Yashamaru?"

Yashamaru's eyes closed, I saw as he turned his head away from us. The Kazekage's face had fallen into a mask, his stern features having grown even sterner.

"Who told you this? Yashamaru," the Kazekage snapped his head towards his second in command, but I quickly intervened.

My hands squeezed Gaara. Please, let me speak for now, I wanted to say to him. But I simply tightened my grip in his.

"It was not Yashamaru who told us," I whispered softly, then frowned at him. "And you're avoiding the question, otousan!"

There was a moment of silence before the Kazekage turned his gaze fully on me. "For the sake of the village, we must know if Shukaku is under control. If Gaara or you do not have control of Shukaku, the two of you…must be eliminated for the sake of the village. Any threats to our village must be dealt with," Gaara flinched next to me, "Sunagakure comes before anything else. What happened yesterday, proves that Gaara cannot control Shukaku. If it was not for Yashamaru, children would have died."

I stared at him, unable to believe his words, but at the same time, I was not surprised. One for a million…isn't that the utilitarian way? Isn't that how my world worked too? Sacrifice a little for a lot. That's how it is…and that's how he views us. As the Kazekage, the village came before the village. But that's still so wrong. I breathed out softly.

I replayed the words in my head, remembering them by heart because (sadly) I spent so much time watching it before. I stared into his eyes, his face so similar to Gaara that it made me sad. I spoke my next words with care, everything replaying in my mind.

"All a parent needs to do is to believe in their children. Just that little bit is the most valuable treasure," I whispered, my voice becoming calm.

The Kazekage's eyes widened at my words, his sternness faltering before coming back. Yashamaru, from the corner of my eyes, turned towards me, then back to facing straight ahead, his whole body tensed. The Kazekage opened his mouth, but I continued, my love for Gaara and for Yashamaru, along with love I had for my new father, pushing me forward. Gaara's hand tightened on mine. I took comfort in his presence.

"You control the Gold Sand, but can you see the true value of things? How can you deem Gaara as useless to Suna if you can't even look at him without fear? Hate?"

"I do not," the Kazekage paused a bit, his eyes no longer stern, but they held a hard edge to them, "hate Gaara."

I felt as tears, of anger and pain, form in my eyes. My body trembled with anger at his words. Gaara's sharp intake of breath next to me made me tug at his arms, praying he understand that I did not want him to comfort me right now. I needed to say this.

"How can you say that while you just tried to have the only father figure Gaara has ever had kill him? Just to test the control he has over Shukaku!"

I shook my head, tears finally falling. I knew of Gaara's fate if the Kazekage and Yashamaru continued with their plan. Gaara's hand tried to pull away from mine, but I held tight and kept him next to him. I took one look at him, pleading. He froze, his eyes blinking at me with hurt and confusion, but he nodded stiffly.

I breathed in, wiping my eyes in vain, but doing it anyways. I turned my violet eyes and looked directly at the Kazekage…at my otousan. He flinched, visibly, as our eyes met.

"Gaara is not a monster. He is not a tool. He is not just a vessel for the Jinchuuriki. _We_ are not just weapons. We are your children," I said quietly, my fists clenched at my sides now. "What gave you the right to have decided this path for Gaara and me, otousan? If it was not for me, Gaara would have been so alone. If it was not for Yashamaru, Gaara would have never known that he was so loved. If it was not for the two of us, Gaara would truly be a monster and not because of the Shukaku, but because of _you and this village_."

I breathed out slowly and held his gaze with mine. I spoke my words with care.

"You took away our future by turning us into Jinchuuriki…and you took our mother away from us," both Yashamaru and the Kazekage flinched, "and now, you're trying to take away our love for her?"

When I finished, I waited for the Kazekage to reply. I have done all I could to try and change fate. To change what once was. I felt as my chest tightened in fear though. I realized then, how wrong everything could go.

If the Kazekage chose to ignore my words, chose to continue with his "test" for the sake of the village, there was nothing I could do. I would have only caused Gaara more pain, having been the one who made the bond between Yashamaru and Gaara even stronger than it once was.

I would have made it worse for Yashamaru also, forcing him to come to love me and Gaara so much that he no longer looked at us as only Karura's last will, but also as his most treasured people. It would not just be one loved one he was betraying, but two.

I closed my eyes when the Kazekage remained quiet, unable to continue looking at his unfaltering gaze. I felt as my chest constricted and as the tears suddenly flowed even more. I felt as the sobs began to form in my throat. I fought them back though, shoulders shaking.

It _hurt_ so much. I never thought anything could hurt this much.

I had always felt so much emotions when I watched Gaara's childhood. Gaara has always moved me. I've even cried a couple of times. But never before had it been this real.

I remember the scene of Gaara's tears when the Kazekage finally told him the truth about that night; the truth about Yashamaru and Karura. Gaara's tears as he realized that he had been loved all along had been a favorite scene, one watched over and over again. However, even though it had been a great tear jerking scene…was also the cruelest scene. It was cruel because I now understand what truly led to that moment.

Betrayal, lies, pain, failure, and death.

I did not want to see Gaara cry like that in reality. I did not want Gaara to ever feel unloved, to ever doubt Yashamaru and our mother. A sob escaped then. She _was_ my mother, I remember her last words to Gaara and me. How cruel that these two men, who claimed to love her so, were able to do the exact opposite of what she wanted?

Through my sobs, I forced myself to continue talking. I needed to say it all, say everything because I could not let history, let the future, be what it was. I let go of Gaara's hand and fell onto my knees. Gaara fell with me and I felt him at my side, shaking me slightly. He whispered words of comfort to me, and I took them in.

I did not want Yashamaru to die hating himself for betraying Gaara and Karura; for Gaara to become a great man only through a torturous and painful life; for the Kazekage to only realize after death how much he failed the son and wife he loved.

"Mothers are powerful," I whispered at the two men, the Kazekage still showing no response, Yashamaru still so silent.

"Okaa-sa is gone, but she still believes in Gaara and I. She still protects us even after death. She's the one who brought us this far. She was the one who gave us life." I choked back a sob and felt as Gaara began crying next to me.

"Her love is the reason for our existence. Please, don't take that away from us. Don't take away our okaa-sa's love."

I was openly sobbing now, unable to stop anymore because I couldn't. I just couldn't. I clenched my hands on my knees. Me, a five year old child with the mind of a woman who has lost so much in both of my lifetimes. Gaara's arms wrapped around my body as he tried to comfort me. I felt his tears then.

I grabbed hold of him, the only comfort I could take in, the only comfort I've known since I was born. I was only a child. I was only a child and Gaara…he was so young. I did not want to fail him.

I did not want to fail them. Please, I begged, silently. Please, help me change the mind of these men, change the shinobi world. I kept begging too, unsure of who to.

It just hurt so much and I wanted to change so much. Please…please.

I felt arms suddenly lift me, lift us, my face turning into a warm chest as rough hands covered my head. Gaara, next to me, seem to curl into the chest. At first, I thought it was Yashamaru, but then…then I felt his chest move with each breath, felt his heartbeat, and listened as he apologized words into my ear, his deep voice so calming.

That warmth, those arms, that protection I had felt so long ago as an infant, was right here. I cried even harder into my father's arms. I kept thinking and referring to Gaara as a child when I had forgotten that in this new world, this new life…I was also just a child.

And as a child, I cried into my father's chest, Gaara silently turning to me as he comforted me, no longer crying.

How could he? He had never seen what he would become, he never saw Yashamaru and the Kazekage die. He never saw what could have been…and I cried even more because I prayed that he would never have to see it.

* * *

><p><strong><em>Until Next Time...<em>**


	8. Start Again

_**Disclaimer:**_ I do not own Naruto!**_  
><em>**

**~Spoilers ALERT! Either be willing to be spoiled or be updated with everything!~**

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><p><em><strong>"How long must I live in order to see you again..." - 5 Centimeters Per Second<strong>_

* * *

><p><em><strong>8 - Start Again<strong>_

**_Suna_**

Kankuro cautiously bit into the andagi, seeming to pause as he chewed. Swallowing he turned to Temari, who was also eating.

"Gaara made these today," he muttered as he quickly grabbed for his second. "Yashamaru seemed rush today. You think something is up?"

Temari's lips quivered into a smirk as she shrugged, taking a bite from her andagi. "Maybe. You never know with Kinnara."

As she took another bite, her smirk fell. The two sat on the steps of the inner part of the training grounds in silence. It was the afternoon already. After finishing the andagi, Kankuro holding an extra one in his left hand as he chewed the one on his right. Temari slowly closed the lid.

Staring at it, she whispered, "They're beginning their training soon."

Kankuro looked up sharply, his eyes narrowing. "With who? The villagers will retaliate."

"Well," Temari swallowed as she turned her eyes skywards, the teal solemn. "They're too dangerous. The old man will train them."

"Oh." Kankuro looked away, eyes turning down at the andagi in his hand. "Are they really dangerous though? They've never even harmed anyone before. I mean, they _are_ our younger siblings…"

Temari jaws clenched slightly, her arms crossing as she leaned back against the pillar. She turned her eyes to Kankuro, a frown on her lips even as he eyes seemed hesitant.

"Why do you care," she questioned sternly, "you don't even like kids."

Kankuro's face scrunched together in distaste. "I never said I liked them! Maybe you do! You always eat more andagi than me!"

"I do not," Temari snapped as she stood up, glaring down at Kankuro. "You're the one who always take extra!"

"So that you won't get them all," Kankuro shouted back as he stood up also. "And why are you do mad! All I'm saying is that maybe we should start being nicer to them!"

"The old man told us to stay away from them and even the council ordered everyone to avoid them!"

"So," Kankuro growled as he wiped his mouth, "you're saying we should just keep eating the treats they make us while treating them like this!"

"You think I want to do that, idiot. We have no choice! And stop acting like you even care!"

Kankuro glared at her before turning away. "I don't care. I just don't think it is right. I know you think so too!"

Temari, jaws clenching slightly, whispered, "It doesn't matter. Nothing changes the fact that mom's dead because of them."

Kankuro flinched at her words. Temari, instantly regretting her words, turned away. Kankuro opened and closed his mouth, unsure of how to reply. Clenching his fingers, he turned away also.

The two stomped off in different directions. However, both knew that the other was not really angry. No. Kankuro's words hit home closer than they should have and Temari's words had sounded too much like a sorry excuse made by children. The two of them have been questioning the segregation between the brothers and sisters since they realized that their younger siblings were actually not evil.

The only one who would be considered even close to evil was Kinnara with her quick temper and inability to _not_ voice her opinion. Gaara was the opposite in his quiet demeanor, so shy that he was couldn't even meet their eyes during the few times that Gaara and Kinnara would drop off the andagi boxes in the past year.

Kankuro, sighing as he stopped by the door, looked back at Temari. Temari stood stiffly with her back to him. Kankuro's frown softened as he saw her shoulders shake. He knew that their mom's death had affected Temari more than she would ever let it. Mouth pierced, Kankuro wisely left before Temari began crying.

…

**_~Kinnara~_**

Gaara's fingers tightened in mine as we followed Yashamaru home. The Kazekage was with us, his presence foreign yet comforting too as he walked ahead of Yashamaru, the two softly discussing something.

I turned my eyes to Gaara, his panda face looking after the backs of the two men, his father and his uncle, as they walked ahead of us. I stared at the place where his scar would have been. Gaara's arm tugged me backwards, my eyes snapping to attention when I realized that the Kazekage and Yashamaru had stopped.

Yashamaru turned to us, the Kazekage looking at me once before turning to Gaara. Damn, I should have been listening in on their conversation. I saw as our father took a step forward, his stern eyes for once showing no sternness and instead, was pretty passive and as close to gentle as I have ever seen them.

"Gaara," he beckoned for my brother. Gaara took one glance at me before letting my hand go as he walked to my father's side.

The Kazekage was in his full gear, head and face covered except for his eyes. He turned to me.

"Kinnara, you and Yashamaru will return first. Gaara, come with me."

He turned away, walking in the opposite direction of where Gaara and I lived with Yashamaru. Gaara, hesitating, paused only for a minute before following the Kazekage. I turned to Yashamaru who smiled gently at me, but I saw something else in his gaze. Questions.

Damn it.

I really should have known this was going to happen. I fought the sigh wanting to escape my lips as I followed Yashamaru home.

…

Yashamaru, surprisingly, did not unload the questions until after I've changed. Instead, I found myself sitting in the kitchen, legs swinging from where I was sitting on the counter as Yashamaru cooked lunch.

The only sound in the kitchen was that of chopping and the bubbling of boiling water. I held my breath, unsure of when he would start talking and luckily he did not disappoint me an hour within arriving home.

"How did you know," he asked quietly, eyes never leaving from his cutting.

I looked at the knife and the onions being chopped. My fingers dug into the edge of the counter as I lifted my eyes up.

"How do you know if it was actually Gaara and not me?"

Yashamaru stopped in his cutting, head turning to me with a frown on his lips. "Kinnara."

Oh. He dropped the honorifics. I guess he was serious. I looked away. What to do. What to reveal. What to say and how to say it. Oh, I knew what your plans were because I have memories of my old life where you died and was actually part of an anime/manga hit of the early 21st century, but don't worry, I don't know everything because I died before it even ended and here I am.

Yea.

I can imagine the reaction I would get. Maybe one day…one day I could tell him, but not today. Too much was at stake and I still had too much to change. Too much to save…

I turned back to him.

"I can't tell you yet."

"Yet?" His eyes furrowed together.

"Yes, not yet. Maybe one day, but," I looked down at his hands again, "but only when you are ready for the truth."

Yashamaru sighed, setting the knife aside. He turned his body fully to me.

"Tell me this then, Kinnara. IS Shukaku involved with this?"

I snapped back to him, eyes widening. "No! Not at all."

My words must have reassured him because he suddenly relaxed, shoulder dropping as he returned to the cutting.

"You promise to tell me one day?"

"I promise," I whispered softly.

He smiled, lips curving upwards softly. "What you did today. Thank you."

My legs stopped swinging, my eyes blinking in surprise. "Yashamaru..."

"My sister," he stopped, shaking his head, "your mother would be proud of how you stood up for yourself and Gaara today. I," he stopped cutting, "I could not have done it."

I jumped off of the counter and made my way to him. Wrapping my arms around his waist and laying my cheeks against this back, I felt as he stiffened at the contact.

"Mama would be proud of you too. For taking care of Gaara and me…for showing us love."

Yashamaru's stiffness suddenly disappeared, his whole body relaxing as I let him go. I returned to my spot on the counter and it turned back to any day where Yashamaru cooked. Except that Gaara was not here. However, another half hour later, he returned alone without the Kazekage, which made me sad.

As soon as Gaara came through the door, I glomped him. We both fell onto the floor, Gaara making an umph sound as I landed on top of him.

"You were great today," I said to him as I continued to hold him, squeezing him.

He muffled something against me and I pulled back then fell sat up as he pushed me off him. Gaara smiled at me, his eyes seeming brighter than usual today.

"You were right, Ki-chan," he whispered.

"I was?"

Gaara nodded, eyes lightening up. "That they just needed to be taught."

I blinked at him, remembering our conversation from this morning. "Where did otousan take you?"

Gaara suddenly looked down at his hands, eyes lowering. "He took me to go see mama."

I blinked at him. The Kazekage…took…him…to go see Karura? I slumped down, watching Gaara even more closely. "What did he say?"

Gaara looked back up at me, his smile and eyes soft and so cute. "He said that mama likes flowers. We should bring flowers to mama tomorrow." He bit his lips before continuing. "We should ask nii-san and nee-san to go with us."

I opened and closed my mouth, watching him closely. "Okay."

He turned sharply back to me. "Okay?"

I smiled. "Yep. We'll ask them tomorrow."

Gaara's smile appeared again. "Okay."

Yashamaru appeared then, wiping his hands. "Gaara-sama, okaeri."

Gaara quickly turned his attention to Yashamaru. Right off, Gaara was asking him questions. I slowly stood up, watching the two. I was still in disbelief that I had…made a difference. It felt good, yet it felt like any time now someone will pull the rug from my feet and everything, all that was good and fragile, will disappear before my eyes.

* * *

><p>...<p>

* * *

><p><strong>The Next Day\**

**_Konoha_**

Shisui sat next to Itachi as the two of them observed Ryuu. The young boy was practicing with Sasuke, the other boy missing his target as the kunai hit above the intended target. Ryuu said something, Sasuke's frown turning into a smile when Ryuu handed Sasuke another kunai. Seeing his little brother smile, Itachi felt as his chest relaxed before turning his eyes back onto Ryuu.

"How is he," Itachi asked Shisui as he leaned down on his knees, bangs covering his eyes a little.

Today was Ryuu's first day from the hospital after his awakening. It had only been a day since he reawakened and after much persuasion from Fugaku and Kaito, the hospital released Ryuu back home.

"Doing well," Shisui muttered as he leaned forward also, frown on his face.

"And the Mangekyo?"

Shisui paused, closing his eyes before turning to Itachi. "It's…something else. I'm not sure how to explain it to you except that with enough training, Ryuu will go far with it."

Itachi's eyes glazed over even as he nodded. Ever since finding out that Ryuu, the same age as his little brother, received the Mangekyo, Itachi has become restless. After Kaito's blatant objection in letting Fugaku know about Ryuu's Mangekyo, Itachi realized that something within the Uchiha clan was changing. He could feel it.

He remembered a time, during the war and before Ryuu's birth, where Kaito as one of the main elders of their clan counsel, would have followed every word of the clan head. Kaito was actually good friends with Itachi's grandfather, the previous clan head that had died during the war and it had been Kaito who guided Fugaku through his new role.

In fact, Itachi's eyes closed, it was at Kaito's suggestion that had led Fugaku in sending his then only son into war. The experience had changed Itachi. He did not hold anything against the two men. It was war. People were dying. Itachi…would not have changed the decision. Reopening his eyes, Itachi turned his gaze back onto the two young boys, the same age yet so different in experience.

He hated how children were being used to fight. Ryuu was too young and Sasuke…well, Itachi has long ago frowned upon his father's actions as a father. But to see Kaito, a respected councilmember of the Uchiha clan, hiding a secret from the head, made Itachi question his father's role as a father and a leader even more. If even Kaito is willing to withhold information from Fugaku, what else is he doing behind the head's back?

Shisui nudged him, breaking his thoughts. "Hey, I think they're packing up."

Itachi refocused his attention on the two, smiling softly as Sasuke rushed towards him. Ryuu followed close behind.

"Nii-san," Sasuke exclaimed excitedly, "did you see that?! Ryuu-kun just showed me how to throw three kunai at once!"

Itachi beckoned Sasuke to come closer, the boy eagerly following the request before frowning as Itachi poked his forehead. Shisui chuckled at the familiar antic and Itachi noticed how Ryuu's eyes suddenly fell, a flicker of unplaced emotions crossing his face. Itachi's eyes flashed once at Ryuu before turning back to Sasuke.

"I'm sorry Sasuke, I did not see it. Maybe you can show me next time?"

Sasuke pouted. "When is next time?"

Itachi smiled sadly at him, chest constricting as he poked Sasuke's forehead again. "I promise you, next time. Okay?"

"'Kay," Sasuke muttered before turning away to put away his kunais.

Itachi turned to Ryuu, the boy nodding at him before turning away and began walking in the other direction from the Uchiha compound. Frowning, Itachi watched after Ryuu as the boy called out goodbye to them, Sasuke's voice echoing his farewell. Itachi turned to Shisui, the older boy watching after Ryuu.

"Where is he going," Itachi questioned as the three of them headed off towards the compound, Sasuke walking next to Itachi.

Shisui shrugged. "Probably to the Hyuuga compound."

"Hyuuga?" Itachi questioned before blinking in surprise. "He is still playing shogi with the Hyuuga?"

Shisui nodded slowly, eyes looking ahead. "Yes."

Sasuke watched the two in confusion. "Hyuuga?"

Itachi turned to Sasuke, nodding before turning back to Shisui. "What does Kaito think about the interaction between the two? It is uncommon for a Hyuuga and an Uchiha to be friends."

Shisui smirked a little. "Kaito-san is…very different than he once was. He spoils Ryuu if you have not noticed. When Ryuu asked if he could play shogi with a Hyuuga, you can understand my uncle's hesitance, but he has never been able to say no to Ryuu. At least, not within my hearing."

Itachi blinked, taking in Shisui's words. Indeed, Kaito has changed much since the birth of his son. Hizuki has always been the one only to see his light side, but since the birth of Ryuu, Kaito has showed a more outward caring side. He turned away, almost not hearing Sasuke's words.

"What's wrong with the Hyuuga clan?"

Shisui turned to him. "Nothing. It is just," he paused, searching for the right words, "uncommon for the Hyuugas and the Uchihas to get along."

Sasuke frowned at him still confused, turning questioning eyes to Itachi. Itachi returned his gaze with soft ones.

"You will understand one day, Sasuke."

Sasuke frowned even more opening his mouth, but at Itachi's hand on his shoulder he stopped. Closing his mouth, Sasuke nodded.

Shisui watched the two with worried eyes. He was worried about their relationship. If he did not have Ryuu, Shisui would have never noticed it as he did not interact much with kids. After all, the Uchiha clan was small and in truth, Ryuu and Sasuke were the youngest members. Both were prized children of the Uchiha. However, he _did_ have Ryuu and seeing as Ryuu and Sasuke were the same age, he has questioned the way Itachi and his parents treated Sasuke.

The boy was young and he understood their desire to keep things from him, but Ryuu was also young and yet…Shisui's eyes darkened as he turned his head away. Yet Ryuu has already killed a man and become a shinobi. Itachi was even younger when it had happened to him.

He promised himself then that he would have a talk with Ryuu about it before he talked to Itachi about it. Ryuu, for one so young, was always very perspective and he was close to Sasuke.

…

Hyuuga Hinata fingers clasped onto her knees as her wide open eyes watched in awe as Neji fell backwards, landing on his back. Next to her, Hiashi watched as the young boy who had just defeated Neji held a hand out to his nephew.

The head of the Hyuuga clan's stern eyes furrowed together as everyone watched how Neji deflected the hand, standing up by himself. Hiashi did not miss the scowl and anger that flashed Neji's young face.

The other boy, looking so similar to Neji that they could have been brothers, made no reaction as he let his hand dropped. The two boys, in unison, bowed their heads towards the head of the Hyuuga clan.

Hiashi breathed out softly as he stood up, hands slipping into his sleeves. Hinata quickly followed her father's actions, standing up as well. Hiashi turned his back to everyone, the door sliding open as a branch member knelt in the presence of the clan head. Hiashi's head turned slightly towards the two boys, eyes opening.

"I expect you see you tonight to continue your training, Haru," he whispered softly before leaving, the branch member quickly standing up as he followed after Hiashi.

Hinata waited a second longer before she turned back to the two boys. Both of them, with their long hair worn in similar ways and even wearing the same outfit, held dissimilar expressions. Neji continued scowling as Haru smiled.

Hinata bowed her head to Neji as the older boy passed her, but Neji made no acknowledgment of her as he stalked out. Haru's pale featureless eyes watched after the disappearing form of his opponent before turning bright eyes and a smiling face to Hinata.

"N-Nii-sama," Hinata asked as she came to his side, "are you okay?"

Haru laughed as he reached out and rubbed her head affectionately. "Hai, thanks for asking. Neji-kun probably left some bruises, but nothing I can handle. He is, after all, the prodigy of the Hyuuga clan."

Hinata blinked in surprise at Haru, her eyes widening. She was not used to hearing anyone praise or acknowledge Neji's prodigy status out loud. She was always so surprised and shocked by Haru. Haru was the total opposite of their father and the men of their clan. He was not stern, quiet, or even judging. She knew the whispers of her being a failure.

She knew people thought their father lucky that his oldest was not Hinata, but Haru. Their one year old sister, Hanabi was still too young to tell, but the all-seeing eyes of the Hyuugas judged Hinata still. However, Haru dispelled everything, reminding Hinata that as her older brother, he was there to protect her even if it meant from their clan. Hinata's smile softened as she looked at Haru.

He was the spitting image of Hiashi except for the raven color hair which she knew he received from their mother, similar to her. Hanabi was the only one of the trio who had their father's dark brown hair. But even though he was the image of Hiashi, his personality was that of their mother.

Haru was as strong as their father yet as kind as their mother. Haru was Hinata's idol. She wanted to be just like him.

When their mother had passed away, Haru had been the only one to comfort her. When their father turned his disapproving eyes and words to her, it was Haru who redirected Hiashi's focus from Hinata and back to himself. Her nii-sama was her protector and she dearly loved him. She did not know what her life would be like without him. She did not want to even imagine a world without his smiling and reassuring smile.

Haru's sudden tapping of her head broke her out of her trance-like thoughts. Blinking pale blank eyes at him, she jerked her head backwards. Quickly apologizing, she bowed, but Haru simply laughed. His laughter was cut short though as a branch member suddenly appeared, kneeling in front of the two.

"Haru-sama," he whispered, raising his head, "Uchiha-san is here. Shall I bring him and the board to you?"

Haru blinked in surprise. Ryuu was out of the hospital already? Nodding, Haru turned back to his sister. The branch member disappeared.

"Hina-chan," he began softly. "Do not be late to your training with father. I will see you for supper and we can spend tonight with Hanabi after my training."

"H-hai," Hinata stuttered as she bowed again.

Haru, as he watched her go, sighed as his smile faltered. He raised his left arm to stare at his wrist when he realized for the hundredth time since he can remember, that he did not have a watch. In fact, he did not know if watches existed in the Narutoverse.

Sighing, his hand fell back to his side and he walked out of the room, sitting down on the ledge as he slipped on his shoes. His eyes furrowed together as he made his way out of the compound. He ignored everything as his thoughts flew from his surrounding and instead, onto the fact that Uchiha Ryuu was visiting him today for their monthly shogi game.

Well, it had been monthly until Ryuu left for his first mission as a Chunin. Frowning, Haru slipped his black haori on as his eyes sharpened on the appearance of the Uchiha prodigy. Uchiha Ryuu…the spitting image of Xen.

Haru's breath sucked in a little as he recalled memories from his old life. Even now, Haru's chest constricted at the sight of Ryuu. Since the moment he had spied the young Uchiha in the Academy (everyone was talking about the Uchiha prodigy who entered at the age of four then so it was hard not to know about him, much less see who he was) and to their first face to face meeting and their first shogi game...Haru has never gotten over how hard it was too look at Ryuu.

He smiled though, because even if Ryuu was not Xen, Ryuu was still a valued friend.

"Ryuu-san," Haru called out with a friendly smile as the Uchiha prodigy blinked at him with unreadable eyes, "welcome back from the hospital. Here to face defeat once more by my shogi skills?"

There was a moment of silence, Haru's smile faltering. Something was not right. Usually, Ryuu would respond to the light battery. Today, Ryuu's eyes were expressionless, his lips holding only a ghost of a smile.

"Maybe," Ryuu replied softly, his eyes never leaving Haru's, "but shall we begin first before you decide that you have won?"

Haru smiled again, beckoning him to follow him to Haru's private corridor.

…

**_~Xen~_**

I stared down at the board. Memories from both worlds came to me as I recalled how to play the Japanese board game. It was similar to chess in a way and…I turned my eyes back to 'Haru' as he set the game up for us.

I watched him from the corner of my eyes, heart thumping against my chest. It couldn't be, yet it could. Remembering our first meeting to every shogi game and every conversation, things were beginning to come together.

As Ryuu without the memories of Xen, I remember being confused by how friendly the Hyuuga heir was. It had been awkward at first, but after a few more meetings and one game of shogi, I had begun counting him as a friend. But, the things he would say. The references to the words like being on a timer or 'queens' now made sense. And the staring.

I remember always feeling Haru's gaze on me. As Ryuu without Xen's memories, I had been so confused by Hyuuga Haru, especially when he would mutter playfully, "You never could win" even on our first game.

Fingers clenching a little, my mind snapped back to reality as I heard the familiar slap of the first piece being moved. I looked at him, his smile widening. It was not his face, but it was his smile. That smile...

I felt as the breath left me.

"Are you going to move or have you decided to forfeit already?"

Breathing slowly, I shook my head, forcing myself to smile at him. "As if."

_Slap. _I leaned back as I made my move, continuing to watch him.

I watched as he smoothed one finger, his left index, across his chin. The familiar movement, seen so many times by Ryuu and it echoed that of the memories of Xen. The way his eyes closed and opened as he made his move, the way he smirked as if he had a great plan in mind, the self-muttering as if no one was in the room…it was so similar.

_How did I miss this?_

Haru tapped the board, eyebrow quirking at me. I blinked before quickly making my move, refocusing on the game.

My thoughts stayed on the game for the next hour, the two of us quiet. The only sound was that of the slapping of pieces and the shifting of legs as we readjusted ourselves into a more comfortable position after two moves or so.

I was so focused yet still thinking about what could be that I made a mistake and then I realized right when I was going to lose. I watched as he played his move and smirked at me. I stared at the piece, my eyes unable to look at him.

"Well, Ryuu-san," Haru said. "Seems like you have lost yet again."

I felt as my whole body locked, my heart seeming to flutter painfully in my chest. I had to know. I had to know if it was him. Without looking at him, I laid my finger on my silver general. I said my next words with a heavy heart and even heavier soul.

"I could never beat you at chess, what makes you think I can ever beat you at shogi?"

Haru laughed at my words, his body shifting from the corner of my eyes. I could not look at him. I just couldn't because his next words would confirmed everything.

"That's true," he mutter and I froze, stiffening. "You've always been so good at everything and it was good to finally be better at something that _you_ weren't."

My hand stayed on the piece even as Haru began fixing his pieces. I waited painfully…patiently for him to realize what he had just said. What _I_ had said. And at the sudden sound of a piece hitting the ground, I knew that everything had finally sunk in.

My lone finger tapped the silver general gently, my eyes unable to look away at the wooden piece even as I felt Haru fall onto his knees. My next words held too much emotion in them, my throat constricting a little.

"I never could strategize like you," I whispered softly.

I felt then as tears formed in my eyes and as the emotions that had been walling itself in my chest, the hope, the grief, the pain…the fifteen years of living without him, finally breaking. But it was fifteen years. And a whole life time.

There were no more wet tears or painful sobs, just dried tears and empty wails from my broken soul. I felt as my chest constricted, my hand finally moving away from the piece as I began to fix my side. Piece by piece, I readjusted them, starting over again.

I wanted to start over again.

I slid each one carefully into its place. I laughed once more as I began to fix his side, taking the same painstakingly care as I did with mine.

"You know, I really missed playing with you. Maybe one day I can beat you, just once."

As I leaned forward to pick up the piece he had dropped, his hand suddenly grabbed mine and there was a moment of tense silence before I finally looked up at him. My jaws clenched as I saw the tears that ran down his eyes as he looked at me. They were not the eyes I remember or the face I once knew, but the emotions were ones I could never forget.

"Xen?"

It was a breathless mutter, a low whisper that only I could hear.

I nodded then, smirking as I laughed again, this time and for once in a long time, truly meaning it. I shook my head at him though as he opened his mouth to say something else. I quickly interrupted him.

"A game always have spectators. Eyes and ears that cannot be seen, but they are always watching the moves we make, right, Haru-san?" I pulled my hand away and gently placed his gold general back in place before continuing to my spot.

I indicated for him to begin. Haru, catching my message, nodded as he quickly wiped his tears, even as they kept falling, and made his first move. His fingers trembled. I smiled at him reassuringly as I made my first move.

"Would you join me tonight for training," I asked him as I leaned away, catching his eyes.

Haru's eyes furrowed together in hesitance before making his move and answering. "I cannot tonight…I already promised my night to my sisters."

Sisters. Chest constricting once more I nodded as I moved again.

"Of course. How are they?"

"Hinata is doing well," Haru began as he moved a piece, "and Hanabi has just started walking."

"And Neji-san?"

Haru smiled sadly. "Neji-kun is the same as usual."

I nodded, understanding his meaning. I saw the way his fingers clenched. He must have tried to stop Hinata's kidnapping. Actually, I know he did, remembering his words to me the next time we met after Hinata's kidnapping and Hizashi's death. I placed my hand over one of my pawns, pausing. I looked up at him, catching his eyes.

"There are things we cannot change. No matter how much we wish and fight for change. Sometimes, change works in the opposite direction of our desires."

There was a moment of silence after my words before my meaning sank in. And then the hidden message. His eyes suddenly widened. I made my move and leaned back. I met his horrified eyes, knowing what he was thinking about.

The Uchiha Massacre.

Clenching his jaw, Haru made the next move, the board trembling at the sudden force he put onto it. The piece slapped loudly against the board.

"But," he replied as he leaned slightly towards me over the board. "There are things that can be changed."

I shrugged. "Maybe. Everything is debatable."

I saw him stiffen. I moved a piece, but then stopped as he suddenly stood up. Haru stared at me and I stared back at him, eyes as passive as I could make them.

"It's not debatable," he whispered.

My eyes closed as I placed the piece back down in its original spot. I tried to remember when he died and what he would know.

Thinking about it, I realized that he never even got to the time skip. Eyes furrowing, I reopened them to stare down at the piece in my hand. That means he did not know about the truth behind the massacre.

It explains then why whenever I mentioned Itachi's name before the memories came back, he would get angry and even irritated at Itachi. I sighed softly.

Damn it. So much to explain, so much.

"Haru-kun," I said lifting my gaze to meet his unflinchingly. "Let us meet tomorrow at training ground three."

I stood up, eyes never leaving his. I saw him open and close his mouth, but I shook my head at him. We could not talk now. Not in the Hyuuga compound or anywhere near or around people.

He clenched his jaws, fingers clasped at his side as I moved past him, pausing as I got close to him. Head facing forward, shoulders next to his, I noticed how much taller he was. It was ironic yet not surprising that he was older than me.

Slowly, my fingers reached sideways, the tips grazing his hand gently. I felt as my chest constrict once more at his physical presence.

I've touched him before, hands clasping shoulders or sparring together, but I've never touched him as Ryuu with Xen's memories…or with the knowledge that he was Su's reincarnation with the memories of our past life.

There were many unanswered things, but it could wait for tomorrow.

I felt as he relaxed at my touch, his head turning towards me.

"I," he paused before looking away. "I'll see you tomorrow. At dawn after my training with my f—"

I was gone before I could hear him finish. I did not want to hear that word from his lips. I do not know what he remembers, don't know if he knows how he died. But I did not want to remember.

I stopped running at the gates of the Hyuuga compound, heart pounding against my chest. I slowly raised a hand to my chest, trying to understand if everything was real. But the steady and hard thumping of my heart was a constant reminder that I was alive…that I was Uchiha Ryuu.

I looked back once more at the Hyuuga compound.

It was a reminder that my younger brother, the one I lost so long ago, was Hyuuga Haru.

* * *

><p>…<p>

* * *

><p><strong><em>~Kinnara~<em>**

I sat on the bed, slowly and gently smoothing Gaara's hair out from his face. It's been an exhausting day for us, especially for Gaara. We had begun our training today in the morning with the Kazekage. My fingers paused over his face, at where the scar of love would have been. I pulled back, simply watching him.

Gaara and I lacked a lot to be honest. We were not used to fighting. The sand was always defending us which forced the Kazekage to work us even harder today even though it was our first time. Our first lesson today: do not rely solely on the sand.

Our second lesson…well, it was not a lesson. I looked down at my hands, remembering the moments before and after our training.

_Temari and Kankuro stared at us. I felt as Gaara stiffened, his fingers clasping at his sides. He repeated his question._

_"W-would nee-san and nii-san come with Ki-chan and I to visit mama today?"_

_Temari's eyes, I saw, were conflicted as she watched the two of us. Kankuro simply stared at us with stern eyes. I clenched my jaws slightly before turning to Gaara._

_"Gaa-kun," I whispered as I tugged at his hand, my fingers encircling his. "It's okay, we can go by ourselves today."_

_Gaara looked down dejectedly. He slowly nodded before letting my fingers go and leaving the training building. Yashamaru, taking one glance at me, quickly followed Gaara out. I looked back at Temari and Kankuro. I met Kankuro's stern gaze with my own. I then turned to Temari, my eyes softening._

_"I'm sorry," I whispered._

_The two blinked at me, startled. Temari opened and closed her mouth before turning abruptly away. Kankuro looked between the two of us before crossing his arms and looking downwards. I stared at Temari's back before looking at Kankuro and down at the ground too._

_"I know," I began again, "that it hurts to see us." _

_I hugged myself, arms wrapping around my small figure. I bit my lips, wondering and asking myself if I should say this, before continuing._

_"But it's not our fault." I closed my eyes. "We love her too, you know. We lost our mama too."_

_With those words, I reopened my eyes and without looking at them, I left. _

I slowly stepped out of our bedroom, eyes casted downwards before I felt as someone touched my arm. Startled, I looked up, meeting Temari's teal eyes. She looked at me, with hesitance and a hint of uncertainty, before nudging her head towards the closed door.

"Is Gaara asleep?"

I nodded. I was sad that her hand fell away from my arm, but I hid it as I followed Temari as she walked back to the kitchen. I could hear Kankuro and Yashamaru muttering, Kankuro louder than the soft voiced Yashamaru.

"Why do I have to do this," he growled as he washed another plate.

"Because you do," Temari snapped as she glared at his back.

Kankuro stiffened before quickly nodding and continued washing. Temari shook her head at him as I scooted over to the counter and then hefted myself up, legs swinging as soon as I situated myself. Temari, noticing what I did, hesitated a bit. I saw the way her eyes flickered at me then to Kankuro before she made her decision. Following me, she came to sit next to me.

We were silent as Yashamaru and Kankuro finished cleaning up.

I looked at Temari with a sideways glance before looking away again. I smiled, remembering how the two of them had been waiting at the cemetery gate for Gaara and me, Yashamaru right behind us.

_Temari and Kankuro put their flowers at her grave first, then Gaara and I, together, followed suit. Yashamaru was the only one who did not bring flowers. Instead, he had brought a jug of mama's favorite tea, something called the scarlet tears from a red desert flower. I looked around at the 'cemetery' of Suna. _

_Like Japan in my old world, their dead was mostly cremated and some buried. Unlike Japan, though, or even Konoha where they had soil, urns and coffins of the deceased were placed in dents sculpted to the side of underground chambers. Coffins were covered while urns were left in the open-ended dents._

_Each urn with a gravestone in front of it. _

_Mama's grave, because she was the Kazekage's wife, was in one of the larger chambers. The whole chamber was designated for the Kazekage and his family. _

_I looked at the emptiness of it, praying that it does not fill up too soon or…at all for a long time. I turned back to mama's stone, apologizing, but I knew she would not mind being alone for a while longer._

_Temari, I noticed but pretended I did not, had a couple-__maybe several-tears falling and Kankuro was tearing up himself. I wisely made no comment as we lamented. _

We had stayed together in front of her grave for a while before heading back here and to my happiness, Kankuro and Temari had accepted Yashamaru's invitation to lunch. I was glad that they had come after all.

I smiled at Temari and was okay that her returning smile was hesitant. It's okay.

We have a long way to go still. I sighed, turning back to Yashamaru and Kankuro when Kankuro dropped a plate, Yashamaru telling him it was okay even when Temari said the opposite, yelling at Kankuro while apologizing to Yashamaru.

I laughed, shaking my head. I could get use to this.

...

I stayed up later than usual that night, my eyes watching the darkness. I curled my hands at the side of my head. I felt as Gaara stirred next to me.

"Ki?"

I turned to my side, facing him. I watched as the little moonlight that streamed through our window fall on Gaara. He rubbed his eyes sleepily, blinking at me.

"Is it Xen again?"

I shifted towards him, burying my head into his chest as I wrapped my arms around him. Only Gaara knew about Xen. Not the whole story...but just that I have dreams about a certain person named Xen. It was hard to avoid explaining that much from him. He slept next to me after all and he was the one who comforted me.

I nodded into his chest. Gaara curled around me.

"It's okay Ki."

I said nothing. What was there to say?

I missed Xen. I missed him, the man I loved more than anything. I love my parents, my cousins, my aunts and uncles. I loved my friends. But it was not with them that I had planned to settle down with and start a family of my own.

I wanted...I wanted to grow old with him and one day be buried together. I thought of Karura alone in the underground chambers, but I knew that one day, my father will be put down there next to her. Maybe even me...and maybe...no.

I can't imagine it. Starting a family with anyone else. I just...

I snuggled deeper into Gaara.

A part of me, very small, but a tiny part of me wanted to pass on again and...and hopefully be reborn with Xen. Maybe then he would be ready to move on, having lived his life to the fullest of maybe eighty or even a hundred years in our old world.

Maybe in the next life time, we will be reunited. Xen once told me that he believed we were fated to be together. But…I had died. He had lived. Now a world, a lifetime, separates us.

How many years separate us now? How long the miles, the distance…how many dimensions? I still don't even understand why I am here as Kinnara. I don't know anything anymore. But, I just...

How long must I live in order to see you again, Xen?

...

* * *

><p><strong><em>Konoha<em>**

Su followed the path towards the training ground, having been there a couple of times with Xen before (or was it Ryuu?). He heard Xen before he saw him. The sound of pounding echoed through the forest. Frowning, Su continued forward until the sight of Xen smashing his fists against a tree met his eyes.

Stopping, Su paused.

Xen was dressed in the usual Uchiha attire of the high-collared, dark-colored outfit. Su continued forward until he was standing only several feet away from Xen.

The pounding, the flying of fists continued for a while longer until Xen finally broke the tree down with a single punch. As the tree fell, the sound echoing through the forest, causing birds from nearby trees to fly away, and Xen's hands fell limp at his sides.

Su frowned as he saw the blood dripping from both fists, the skin broken and bleeding pretty heavily. But there was one question on his mind and he knew that Xen could take care of himself.

"How long," he breathed out finally.

Xen shifted his head slightly to the left, looking at Su from the corner of his eye. When Su met Xen's, his eyes widened in shock.

"X-Xen," he stuttered, uncaring that he was using Xen's old name. "Y-your eyes—"

"Fifteen," Xen replied instead, ignoring Su's shock over the Mangekyo. Deactivating them, Xen turned away and slowly began healing the wounds on his fist.

"W-what," Su stuttered, still shocked at what he had seen. Xen had the Mangekyo already? How—

"Fifteen years," Xen whispered, his broken fists encased in green healing chakra, "six months…two weeks and five days." Xen looked up, meeting the shocked blank pale eyes of Su. "I lived fifteen years, six months, two weeks and five days without you."

Su froze, his whole body going numb. He counted in his head, hands trembling. Fifteen years? That meant that Xen died when he was thirty-one. His mind whirled with the information, but Xen's next question startled him from his thoughts.

"What do you remember…about dying, I mean."

Su shook a little, his body trembling as he looked at Xen. "I-I don't remember much, honestly. Just that I came home and everyone was gone. I was getting a snack when I," Su paused, running a hand through his hair, "I don't know. I just remember flying and, call me crazy, but it was like I was in the cosmos. That's all I remember until I was reborn here, but when I came here, I barely remembered anything. It was only when I saw you for the first time at the academy that everything began coming back."

Xen's whole body, with his words, suddenly stiffened. The healing stopped, the onyx eyes turning unreadable. Su walked towards Xen slowly, his hands no longer trembling as he caught Xen's broken and bleeding hands in his.

"What are you doing? Don't stop healing them," Su muttered as he began healing them himself. Raising his eyes, Su froze.

Xen stared at him with dead eyes, his face holding no expression.

"Ryuu," Su asked concerned. "What's wrong?"

…

_**~Xen~**_

What's wrong…what's wrong?

I don't know. I don't know what is wrong anymore. Su…Su doesn't know.

I forced myself to shake my head. I looked down at our hands, his healing mine. The blood had already stained the grass below. It was strange really. Su and my blood…shared nothing now. We were no longer blood siblings, not even half.

Half.

I raised my eyes back to his, Su's blank Byakugan eyes watched me with concern. I barely registered his next question as I still fought to just _understand_ his last ones.

Su doesn't remember…

"So," Su whispered as he continued to watch me with concern, "what happened to me?"

He doesn't know.

"I," Su sighed, "I know it's heartless for me to ask it like that, but I-I don't know what happened. One minute I was me then I was…not. What happened to me, Xen?"

**He doesn't know**.

I looked back down at our hands. He was a Hyuuga now. I was an Uchiha. We were no longer related by blood. But…

I turned back to him, eyes softening as I smiled sadly at him.

But he was and will always be my little brother. No matter how many lifetimes we will live, rather we knew each other or not, he will always be my little brother.

I will always protect him, always love him.

Slowly, I removed my hands from his, startling him. I ignored his protest and instead, wrapped my arms around him, squeezing as hard as I could. Su stopped protesting, frozen in shock.

After a minute, he returned the hug and then I felt as he began to sob, his whole body shaking. Su buried his head in my shoulder, arms wrapping around me. It would be a funny scene really, if it was not so sad.

"I'm sorry Xen," Su whispered against me, sobs breaking and making his words incomprehensible, but I understood. "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry." He shook his head. "But god," he pulled back and wiped his tears, sobbing and laughing like the idiot he always was and will be. "You know, you're so old. Dying at thirty-one," he hiccupped a little before crying more.

"What happened after I died? A-and," he cried even more, "you never answered how I died. What happened to everyone? What did they all become, what did you become? And did you marry your little girlfriend yet? God, did you leave her behind?"

And on and on the questions went. He had so many questions, so much tears. He could only understand the peak of what fifteen years was, the span of it. I was no longer holding him and instead, the two of us had fallen onto our knees.

I listened, watched, and simply comforted him as he cried and cried…and cried. I'm not sure how long he cried (how did someone cry for that long?) or how many times he repeated himself, but when he finally stopped, sobs ceasing and chest heaving, I finally answered him.

I reached out, my six year old hand rubbing the head of a ten year old boy, the older brother even now. I let him continue healing my hand and…I began the story, slowly.

"You died from a robbery," I began softly, my eyes staring down at our hands. "We missed you like hell and continued to miss you for the next fifteen years…"

And I continued weaving everything, putting it so perfectly together, eyes never leaving the healing warmth of the chakra flow from his and into mine.

"…she got married to some Hmong man from Washington and moved there with him. We had the cutest niece…"

And I found myself almost believing my own lies.

"…our wedding wasn't so big. You know how I hated that stuff. It was an American wedding too of course, since she is not Hmong…"

But I knew it wasn't real. The scars and grief, it hung over me still, digging deeper and deeper as I continued with the tale, the lies, and the story of what could have been.

"…I became a doctor and worked in the cities. I returned home every night so that I could help my children do their homework. You remember how mom always did that for us too…"

And I ended it as best as I could.

I finally looked up then, the healing having been done a long time ago and the two of us were just sitting across from each other. Su was smiling softly, his eyes sad yet content.

"I think I died because of a car accident."

"What," Su began slowly, hesitantly, "what about your family?"

I smiled slowly at him, sadly. "They're strong. They'll make it without me. They have everyone else or have you forgotten that there are six of us left even without you there. Losing someone," I paused, looking away. "You never stop missing them, but you learn. You learn to move on while keeping them with you. There is not a day that you don't remember them and love them." I turned back to him. "And it'll be okay. I wish no one had died, but it cannot be helped."

"I know," Su whispered softly, as he leaned back, eyes watching me closely. "I…I'm glad to know. To finally just know what happened."

I nodded. There was no guilt, no pain. I've done worse things in my fifteen years without him and for worse reasons. I listened as he told me about the day Hinata got kidnapped.

"I tried to stop it, but I," Su closed his eyes, "I was so weak Xen. I almost got kidnapped myself and then of course, history played its course." Su frowned, eyes opening. "Neji hates us. He ignores me and most of the time avoids me. I—"

"Let Naruto handle this," I whispered, reaching forward to touch his shoulder. "Naruto therapy works very well."

"Huh?"

I laughed, "Naruto therapy, it's a term that fans came up with after Naruto used it so many times to change the minds of his enemies."

Su laughed too, his eyes still sad though. "I missed a lot, didn't I?"

I looked upwards, eyes closing. "You'll get it back this lifetime. You have Hinata and Hanabi."

I opened my eyes, continuing to stare skyward. The sun was setting. We've been here for a very long time. I looked back at Su.

"Do you trust me, Su?"

Su smiled then, his eyes laughing. "Sometimes."

I grinned back softly. His presence…his existence in this world changes nothing, but everything I do from now on is for his sake. I finally understand, what Itachi must have gone through when he lied to Sasuke. The love for a sibling. Stronger than even the love for a lover, a parent…a village.

"I've decided to let the massacre happen."

Su sat up, head snapping forward. "Wait, what?! Why?!"

I calmly looked at him. "The massacre is not what you think it is. Itachi is not evil's incarnation."

"I," Su stopped, sitting back down, eyes bulging. It was a strange sight actually…the Byakugan bulging out the way it was. "Okay, explain. I missed a lot, I know I did. So explain away. Kishimoto could not have explained away Itachi's evilness. No way. I have to see it myself to believe it!"

I could not help, but laugh a little. He really did miss a lot. The best spoilers really and the best twist of the Narutoverse in my opinion (besides the whole Naruto and Sasuke being reincarnations and Obito being fake Madara, but that'll come later).

And so I explained Itachi's story. His sacrifice, his love for Sasuke, and his loyalty to the Leaf village and why he did what he did. A mission to lower the curtain on his own clan, to save his village and little brother.

I explained about the Uchiha clan's slow degradation, the coup d'état, and everything except for the death of Itachi and the Edo Tensei justsu. That was too far ahead and I did not want to confuse him. I explained Itachi's role as a double agent in the Akatsuki and even about his illness (which I will prevent and save him from).

The whole time, Su stared at me with an agape mouth and he even cried when I finished.

"Holy crap," Su muttered as he wiped his tears, "just holy crap. What the hell is wrong with Kishimoto?! How could he—the feels! Man," Su cried as he straightened. "God, this sucks, but okay, I'm more willing to listen now…but do we really have to let Sasuke go through that kind of pain? Itachi?!"

I felt myself smile a little, fighting off to laugh from Su's ridiculous response to Itachi's story. "Yes and no."

I looked up at the darkening sky then back at him.

"I'll explain it to you quickly then we have to return. You're only ten, heir to a prestigious clan, and I'm still six, the only son of an important councilmember from another prestigious clan. I'm sure that if we are even another hour late, the whole village will be searching for us."

Su nodded, straightening, eyes focusing on me. I blinked at him, nostalgia overcoming me. I fought the urge to reach forward and rub his hair the way I always did when Su came to me like this, eager to learn and so excited to help.

I felt as something inside of me suddenly fixed itself, like a broken piece of me being mended. I never realized how much it would mean to have him back. So afraid to hope, so scared to even try…and here he was.

I'm not sure what it means, but I do know this: I'm not regretting being reborn into the Narutoverse.

* * *

><p><strong>TBC<strong>

* * *

><p><em>AN: I guess the world will never know. _

_****_...Until Next Time..._** **_


	9. Borrowed Peace

_**Disclaimer:**_ I do not own Naruto!

* * *

><p><em><strong>"Kids who have never seen peace and kids who have never seen war have different values..." - One Piece <strong>_

* * *

><p><em><strong>9 - Borrowed Peace<strong>_

**_/One Year later\_**

**Konoha**

Naruto winced as the pain woke him up. He knew the bruises were going to form soon. Eyes squeezing shut at the pain, Naruto slowly sat up.

"You should rest," a voice whispered.

Eyes snapping open, Naruto flinched, falling off the bed.

Wait. Bed?

Taking a look around, Naruto noticed that he was back in his apartment and his messy room was not so messy anymore. His eyes scanned the room and sure enough, landed on the owner of the voice.

It was a boy, Naruto knew that much. But he was wearing a strange fox mask and a dark cape covering his body and the hood covering his head. The boy was a bit taller than Naruto, his voice kind.

"Are you hungry?"

Naruto, eyes widening, saw that the boy had a tray of steaming food. But his excitement fell when there was no sign of ramen. Naruto opened his mouth, but the boy spoke first.

"I'll get you ramen next time. You should eat something better today though. All that sodium can't be good for you."

Naruto closed his mouth, eyes watching the boy. "Who are you and how did I get back here?"

The boy shrugged as he walked in and set the tray next to Naruto's bed. "I saw what you did. It was brave and kind of you to stand up for Hinata-chan."

"You mean, the girl with the strange eyes," Naruto questioned.

The fox mask simply nodded.

Naruto stared at the food before turning wary eyes to the boy.

"But who are you…and why are you helping me? No one," Naruto looked away, "helps me."

The boy set the tray next to him and turned away.

"You looked like you needed help."

"I don't need help," Naruto snapped, eyes narrowing, "I'm going to be hokage one day and everyone will acknowledge me! I don't need anyone's help! Believe it!"

The boy turned back to him, hands at his side. "Why do you care if they acknowledge you?"

Naruto paused at his words as he stared at the boy. No one has ever asked him that before. He usually got annoyed sighs or irritated whispers of put downs and glares.

Naruto frowned.

"They'll treat me better when I become hokage, ya know."

"Will they though," the boy seemed to muse as he came to stand next to Naruto. "Those who matter don't care and those who care don't matter."

"Huhh," Naruto exclaimed, eyes blinking in confusion.

The boy seem to sigh, but Naruto couldn't be sure.

"If you want to be hokage, you'll need help once and a while." There was a pause before he beckoned towards the still warm food. "And to eat better."

Naruto frowned at him. "The hokage doesn't need help. He's the strongest shinobi ever you know!"

"Everyone needs help," the boy responded sadly, head shaking. "Including you. Take care, Naruto-kun."

But before Naruto could further question him, the boy was gone, disappearing out the window. Naruto got out of his bed, running to the window, but the boy was nowhere in sight.

After eating the meal, Naruto left his room and to his shock, his little apartment building was cleaned and to his confusion, his cupboards were stocked with food. He was happy to see that his ramen was left alone (but stacked neatly away) and he found a note on his newly stocked fridge:

_You shouldn't drink curdle milk and eat only ramen. I'll be back. Have fun at the Academy Entrance Ceremony tomorrow._

Naruto's eyes scrunched in confusion.

Who the hell is this kid?

…

**_/Later that day\_**

**~Xen~**

"Nii-san is so far away from me," Sasuke muttered as he missed his target once more.

I blinked over at him, lowering my own shuriken. I quickly tried to recount what could have happened and remembered about the day before the Academy Entrance Ceremony.

I watched him closely, waiting for Sasuke to continue, but when he didn't, I threw my two shuriken, one hitting its target before quickly throwing a third one to knock the second one into its target at an angle in the air.

At my skills, Sasuke's eyes only narrowed, brows coming together. I saw the jealousy in his eyes, the hopelessness. I went over to him, quickly knocking my shoulders with his. Sasuke blinked out of his thoughts at me. He frowned, turning away.

"Itachi-kun loves you," I whispered softly, "you know that right, Sasuke-kun?"

Sasuke's shoulders shrugged even as his head gave a curt nod. I sighed at this and quickly stopped him when he grabbed for more shuriken. He blinked at me in confusion.

"We should talk," I said.

We were only seven. So young, yet not. Sasuke saw his clan murdered before him at this age. Itachi saw war even before this age.

I led us away from the eyes of Shisui and Itachi, the two sparring in the field not far away. I sensed as Shisui's and Itachi's chakra flicker, both eyes on us as we disappeared in the tree lines, but then they were both back to focusing on each other soon after.

I jumped into the trees, Sasuke struggling to follow. He was getting better at it though. I stopped short as I found the tallest tree that was a good distance away, but near enough where the two older Uchihas won't worry.

Throwing a grin back at Sasuke, I winked at him.

"Beat you to the top!"

Sasuke was not one to let a challenge down and I knew that even though he struggled still with chakra control and running between trees, Sasuke was a good climber. I was not surprised when he won.

Sasuke smirk at me. "You always were bad at climbing."

I shook my head at his arrogance. If I didn't hold back on chakra, I would have won, but no use pointing that out. Sighing, the two of us held onto the tree branches, steadying ourselves as he stared over the tree tops at where the Hokage Monument was.

Sasuke's smirk has fallen, eyes becoming sad once more. Jaws flexing, I glanced at him. I knew he would have a similar conversation with Itachi soon, but there was no harm in having one with him between the two of us.

"You must hate Itachi-kun and me, huh?"

Like before, he seemed taken aback by it. He quickly began to object, but I shook my head, eyes catching his.

"It's okay if you do," I whispered, looking away from him and back at the monument. My eyes focused on the First Hokage. "That's what it means to have a sibling…to be so close to someone that you are compared to them at every turn. It will create spite, no matter how harmless the intention of the judgers are."

Sasuke bit his lips, following my eyes.

"Everyone talks about Ryuu-nii and nii-san. Father only thinks about nii-san and everyone else only cares about Ryuu-nii."

My eyes closed then, anger erupting from me with a sudden vengeance that even I was surprised by it. But I couldn't help it.

I hated Fugaku. I hated the clan. I hated…people.

I sighed, controlling my anger. I felt as Sasuke gingerly touched my shoulder, having sensed my change in behavior.

"Ryuu-nii," he said softly with worry.

I smiled at him reassuringly, before looking away as my smile fell.

"Do you hate your father then?"

Taken aback again, Sasuke was left speechless as he stared in me with horror. I turned back to him, eyes as serious as I could make them without scaring him.

"You are your own person, Sasuke-kun," I whispered. I looked down, fingers clenching on the branch. "You should never feel that you have to become like Itachi or me. Don't take your father's words and actions to heart. Don't listen to those who do not care about you."

Sasuke's eyes had widened in surprise and shock at my words.

"But," Sasuke began, lips trembling with a scowl, "I want to be like Itachi. I want to be strong. I want…"

Sasuke couldn't even finish his sentence, but I did it for him because after all these years and having watched his world in my old life, I knew. I knew Uchiha Sasuke more than he would ever understand himself.

Fingers digging into the branch, I said the words softly.

"You want to be your father's son? For him to say that to you, right?"

Sasuke, at my words, stared at me with pierced lips and teary eyes. He did not nod or show any sign of acknowledgement at my voicing of his greatest desire. He looked away.

I breathed out softly.

Children, shinobis or human or in whatever universe, only wanted one thing and one thing only: parental acknowledgement. A sign of love, any sign of affection, and just something that would claim them as belonging to the people they love and cherish the most. Parents mean the world to a child.

It's why seeing parents like Fugaku…like the Kazekage and my own step father as Xen, sickened and saddened me. They love, but...

"Sasuke," I said softly, "look at me."

Sasuke at first ignored me before a minute later finally turning to me. Eyes of a confused neglected child, he watched me.

But at his eyes, what could I say to him.

That Fugaku was wrong? That his father was a bad father? He would only get defensive. He wouldn't understand. At that age, your parents' were the world. They could do no wrong even if what they do seem confusing. Children, like adults, were blinded by love.

It is human nature.

I sighed.

"I could train you," I began, "I can help you show your father that you are as much his son as Itachi-san is."

At my words, Sasuke's face blinked in surprise before smiling brightly at me.

"I'm joining the Academy tomorrow though," Sasuke said, eyes down casted, "I won't have time anymore to train with Ryuu-nii _and_ nii-san."

I shrugged. "I'll train you when Itachi-chan is busy."

Sasuke smiled at me. "Okay! I want to go tell nii-san!"

Before I could stop him, he jumped down. Sighing, I followed him.

…

As the boys disappeared, Itachi stopped, Shisui's fist stopping inches from Itachi's face as he sensed the sudden drop of Itachi's defense. Glancing to where Itachi's eyes had wondered, Shisui sighed.

"They'll be fine."

Itachi turned to him. "I know."

"But that's not why you stopped," Shisui inquired as he dropped his fist, flexing his fingers.

Itachi looked down, eyes closing, before reopening and turning back to the older boy.

"The mission is tomorrow."

Shisui frowned. "But you will miss Sasuke-kun's Academy Entrance Ceremony. Even Ryuu is going to be there and you know how much Ryuu hates being around children his age."

Itachi nodded as he turned back to where the boys disappeared. "Chichiue wishes for me to go on this mission."

"Does Sasuke-kun understand?"

Itachi had no response. Sighing, Shisui went over to the boy, placing a palm on his shoulder.

"You remember what I told you last time?"

Itachi blinked at him, snapping back to Shisui. Frowning, he nodded. How could he forget? Shisui basically told him that he was being a bad brother to Sasuke and for him to talk to Ryuu.

"I do not think there is anything wrong with how I treat Sasuke," Itachi muttered as his eyes furrowed together.

Shisui crossed his arms, watching the younger boy closely. "You treat him like a child."

"He is a child," Itachi said briskly, frown deepening.

"But he is also a shinobi in training," Shisui tried to reason. "You wish to keep him innocent. I understand this, but in doing so, you are also keeping him ignorant to the world of shinobis."

Itachi's eyes watched Shisui closely. He wished to disregard Shisui's words, but his cousin did not say things lightly. Sighing, Itachi nodded slowly.

"If it is what you wish, then I will speak with Ryuu-kun."

"Itachi," Shisui said as he uncrossed his arms, "you shouldn't do it just because it is what I wish. Do it because you know that Sasuke deserves to know what is happening around him. He deserves to know why you cannot be there for him or why his father seems to favor you."

Itachi's eyes closed, lips pierced tightly. He knew that Shisui had a point.

"I will speak to Ryuu-kun first."

Shisui opened and closed his mouth, before letting the subject drop. He knew that Itachi would talk no more. The two quickly resumed their training, Itachi's attack stronger and fiercer than before, but Shisui simply let it drop and returned the attack with the same fervor.

When the two boys returned, Itachi and Shisui were close to chakra depletion.

But only Ryuu caught on, wisely saying nothing, as Sasuke exclaimed over the news of Ryuu training with him from then on.

…

**Suna**

**_~Kinnara~_**

I winced slightly, pain shooting through my arm. Yashamaru looked apologetically at me even as he gently kneaded my broken hand.

"It's broken," Yashamaru informed everyone, stating the obvious.

I rolled my eyes. I've been telling that to everyone, but it was only at his words that I saw that everyone believed.

The Kazekage frowned at me even as Gaara stood next to him, concern in his eyes. He looked hesitantly between the Kazekage and me before coming to my side. His shoulder touches mine as he sits next to me, staring at the arm in Yashamaru's hand.

"I'm sorry Ki," Gaara whispered as he looked dejectedly down at the ground.

I nudge him with my shoulder playfully.

"It's okay, you didn't mean it," I assured him even as the Kazekage frowned.

"Gaara," he began and I winced at his sterner than usual tone, "You are not responsible for what happens to Kinnara."

Gaara frowned slightly as he turned his head towards our father. "But I was the one who hurt her."

"She should have protected herself better," the Kazekage said sternly. "The sand protect the both of you, but if Kinnara cannot even land on her hands without breaking her arm, it is her responsibility. You must never let your fear of hurting Kinnara stop your training."

I scowled at him. I opened my mouth to tell him to lay off Gaara, but at the sudden squeezing of my arm, I winced. I glared at Yashamaru, the man refusing to look at me as he watched the Kazekage.

Gaara bowed his head. "Hai, otousama."

I sighed and knocked shoulders with Gaara, but winced as the motion jarred my broken bone. Gaara, at my wince, frowned even more. The Kazekage shook his head at me as Yashamaru quickly began healing it, the warm chakra flowing into me.

I never can get over how weird chakra is. I've always noticed it, but at the same time, not. I needed to do some more reading, but books on chakra were confusing. I still needed to work on my Japanese reading skills. Speaking is simple because I grew up learning.

I sighed as Yashamaru finished.

"Kinnara-sama," Yashamaru began as I winced again, trying to move my hand, "you will need a cast."

"Yashamaru," the Kazekage suddenly commanded, all of our heads snapping to him, "return Kinnara home and look after her. Gaara will continue with his training. Alone."

I blinked, mouth opening to object, but winced when Yashamaru once again tapped my broken bone. I glared at him even as he nodded. Before I could say or do anything, he had me in his arms and was gone.

Damn it. I didn't even get to say goodbye to Gaara!

…

Temari and Kankuro laughed as I continued glaring at Yashamaru. Our uncle was smiling gently at me as he finished with the cast on my arm.

"You did it on purpose," I muttered once more.

I saw the shaking of Temari's head as she came over to me and tapped on my cast. I threw my glare at her next to which she sighed.

"Kinnara, only you will be able to break a bone while having the best protection known to the shinobi world."

Kankuro scoffed softly, peering at me. "Yea. How on earth do you break a bone? The sand cushioned you too hard?"

"Actually," Yashamaru began, happy to retell the tale of my clumsiness, but I quickly jumped him.

Yashamaru simply grinned behind my fingers as I clamped his mouth shut, glaring at all of them and trying my best to be scary. Temari sighed at me, telling me to let our uncle go as Kankuro simply laughed.

"Shut up," I muttered as I clutched Yashamaru tighter, but my uncle simply lifted me into his lap and sat me down, moving my arm away while handling my cast carefully.

"Kinnara-sama," Yashamaru began with his you-need-to-behave-better tone, but I jumped off his lap and scrambled away.

Turning to them, I glowered.

"You know what, go away, all of you. I just want Gaara."

All three of them shared a look before Temari and Kankuro laughed, Yashamaru chuckling. Temari stopped and turned to me, taking my glower on with a smile.

"You mean, Gaara is the only one who is nice enough to ignore your bossy, sarcastic—"

"Grumpy," Kankuro interrupted with a smirk.

"And clumsy," Yashamaru also added quickly before Temari could finish.

"—attitude." Temari finished it all without a pause even as the other two added their opinions.

I crossed my arms, but at the cast preventing me from doing it, I simply put them on my hips. God damn it, I hate it when they ganged up on me. Especially without Gaara here to defend me.

"What is this," I asked them, "pick on Kinnara without Gaara day?"

"No. We are just honestly shocked that you got hurt," Temari said as she leisurely leaned against the kitchen counter. Then she seemed to stop, musing before shaking her head with a grin. "Actually, no. It's not surprising that between the two of you, _you_ would be the one with a broken bone."

"Isn't your sand barrier supposed to be impenetrable?" Kankuro crossed his arms as he asked this.

"Well," Yashamaru began again and this time, I threw sand at him.

With my uncle falling backwards at the sand in his mouth, I shook my head and walked out as their laughter followed me. Already, I could hear Yashamaru recover from the sand and was already beginning the tale.

I take it back. I can't get used to this.

…

That night, Gaara came home late. Yashamaru had called it quits, saying that I should too and that Gaara was fine, but I still wanted to wait up for him. When he finally came back, I jumped him.

"Gaa! You left me alone and they picked on me," I whined as I wrapped my arms around him.

Gaara, even after all these years, jerked back clumsily and patted my back awkwardly. One would think he was not used to me.

"I-I'm sorry?"

I sighed as I let him go. I tried my best pout on him.

"Where have you been?"

Gaara's eyes widened a little before flushing and looking away from me. Eyes narrowing, I poked him in the chest.

"What?"

There was a moment of silence before he spoke.

"I trained with otousama."

I frowned at him. "And?"

Gaara finally turned to me, eyes wary.

"He said that I was to train again with him tomorrow. Alone."

I frowned at this. Not surprised, but...

"Okay."

Gaara blinked at me, shocked. "W-what?"

"Okay," I repeated with a shrug. "You ready for bed?"

"B-but," Gaara began, but I laughed.

"Gaara," I said softly, latching onto his side as I walked him through the foyer. "I don't like training to begin with. I'm actually quite happy with this."

Gaara stared at me in confusion. "Don't you want to learn how to control Shukaku?"

I rolled my eyes. "Is that what he told you?"

Gaara shook his head. "I-I overheard the guards."

"Well, our sand control does _not _come from Shukaku so you can ignore those idiots," I muttered angrily.

"But," Gaara began again, but I shook my head.

"It's fine. I'm sure otousan has his reasons. Don't worry about it Gaara.

"H-hai," he muttered as I finally won him over.

As we laid together in bed, his back to me, I simply stared into the darkness.

I really saw this coming. I was...very inept at training. At this whole shinobi thing really. I know that some diehard fans of Naruto would die to be in my position, but...I honestly don't want to be a shinobi. I don't want to fight.

Actually, I'm glad he's taking me off of training. Maybe then Gaara, Temari, and Kankuro can be there trio like in the original timeline.

I sighed.

It may be more of my other upbringing though, more of the old memories in me. I had led a safe life. A well-protected life. War never touched American soil during my time. I heard about it all the time though. War, death, murder. Xen's life...was the closest to death I've been to death besides my own. Heck, I still don't even get chakra.

I lifted my hand into the air, staring at it even in the dark.

I could feel the chakra right now, flowing through me. I guess that chakra for others in the Narutoverse is like blood to people in my old world. You knew it was there. You were born with it, the chakra inside of you a possession that belonged inside of you and something that only shinobis specialized in. I was very sensitive to it at first, but because of the sand, I've gotten used to it. But I could still feel it.

It flowed around me and inside me. My own chakra within and nature chakra outside. Then there were the chakra signatures of people around me, even regular civilians. I lowered my hand and stared at the darkness beyond the small window of our room.

I was not a fighter. I've never killed anyone before. I'm conflicted by two upbringings: the one of shinobis and the one of an American born child.

I closed my eyes.

I was not going to start complaining about being dropped from training. I knew from the start that it was not for me and it's been a goal of mine. I couldn't break the sand sibling trio!

Plus I couldn't force myself to train in the arts of killing someone. That's what it is. That's what it means to be trained as a shinobi.

And...I was not a shinobi. I don't know if I can become one.

It reminded me too much of Xen.

This life, these values.

Xen was taught to kill by the government. To be a murderer for our country, in the name of protection.

In the end, it was still murder, wasn't it?

I sighed. I hated this.

What should I do, Xen?

We all search for the same happiness. In this world and the next. We all want peace, don't we?

I reflected about what I knew of this world...of the so call "bad guys."

Nagato wanted peace. Madara wanted a better world. Obito wanted pain and suffering to stop.

What—how can I kill another human being? Is the pursuit of happiness...a selfish desire then?

I turned on my side, hand resting on Gaara's back as he slept.

Gaara, without me, would be a murderer at this age. But even then, he was still a good person in the end.

But still. The people he murdered were not just nameless people. They were in the other world...but here, they were shinobis, civilians.

They did not die here at Gaara's hands, but because of a world like this, where murder is not considered wrong, but necessary if need be...where anything can be justified to save a village, a life, a home. What—

I stopped my thoughts, eyes closing.

The Narutoverse was not so different from my old world. It was just that...the bad things...death and despair, were deeply entrenched in the lives of everyone.

People who have never known peace, have different values from those who have never known war.

I have never known war.

And I am beginning to understand, that I have never known peace either.

* * *

><p><strong>~TBC~<strong>

* * *

><p><em>AN: I am truly sorry for the LONG update. **I am thankful for all the favs/follows though and reviews. Thank you! They make my day and made me very guilty.****T_T **_

_**I am glad that you are enjoying it though. With the added twist of another OC. **_

**_!BUT!_**

_Two things...Good news and Bad News._

_Bad: It's just...god damn it, Kishimoto! Wth am I suppose to do now? All these new information, new enemies, new stuff to think about. I am close to just saying, FUCK THIS and giving up on a Naruto fanfic, but I've decided that this fanfic will just have Madara as the main nemesis and not Kaguya. And maybe not even Hagoromo. It's so much and so confusing. It doesn't really fit this fanfic. I will need to think about this._

_But -_

_Good: I am getting next chapter ready and update should be within a week or even less ;)_

_P.S. sonyat, you had a question about the genre being parody...it was mostly because I don't know what genre to put this story in. Right now, I've changed it into Drama/Adventure, but if you have a better suggestion, please give me some. I was thinking turning it into Drama/Angst or something, but not sure yet. Is this story angst-y so far? _

_**...Until Next Time...**_


	10. Uchiha Massacre 1

_**Disclaimer:**_ The only things I own are my laptop, iPad, and my life. So...no Naruto. Sadly.

* * *

><p><strong><em>"You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain..." - The Dark Knight<em>**

* * *

><p><em><strong>10 - Uchiha Massacre Pt. 1<strong>_

**/Three Months Later\**

**Suna**

His stern eyes studied us closely as he began to speak again. For training, he had forgone the Kazekage uniform and instead wore regular Suna shinobi outfit, his face bare and fully exposed. Gaara truly did get his looks from our father.

"Harness the sand as a weapon," he began again with a series of hand seals, too fast for us to see, "and as a shield. Use it. Control it. Feel how it beckons to _you_."

With a sudden burst, golden sand flashed towards us, the Kazekage's eyes never losing their sternness. Squeezing Gaara's fingers once more, I let him go.

Gaara, hesitating a little, jumped away from me as I followed his move, twisting away from him. The golden sand parted in two, targeting the both of us.

Breathing out softly through my nose, I felt as the sand instantly rose up around me instinctually. As it stopped the golden sand, I quickly did the hand signals for the shinkuha.

When I finished, the wind surrounded itself around me as more golden sand came from behind. The wind smashed some of the sand away and the ones that were not knocked down by my jutsu were blocked by my sand.

I knew that the sand would protect me, but I needed to show the Kazekage that I didn't need it only. I concentrated.

I felt as the chakra in my right eye seeped to my optic nerves and flow into the sand orb forming in my hand. I could never do it as cool as Gaara, but the third eye jutsu was still useful when one was incased in sand.

More golden sand came down at me, but I knew the sand would hold. I let the orb go and it sunk into the sand. I had done the move several times now, having seen it a couple of times on Naruto, but actually doing it was cooler (and via freaky).

With my right eye, the lids still closed, I watched through my third eye as Gaara continued dodging the sand. Unlike me, he had not opted to stay and defend and instead, I watched as he used the sand as stepping-stones and pillars to block the golden sand whenever it got too close.

The third eye flickered a little and I cursed under my breath as my vision became obscured in gold. It doesn't matter anyways, I was satisfied to know that Gaara was holding his own.

Thinking quickly, I concentrated the chakra in my body. I redid the shinkuha as I released the sand from blocking me. With the sand gone, the gold burst towards me, but as I finished the last seal, the wind encircled me, creating a barrier before bursting outwards, throwing the sand off.

Gaara, I saw, was making his way towards me, jumping through the air as he dodged another gold sand strike. My heart stuttered though as I saw him fly towards the golden pit, but then to my relief right as Gaara's small hands reached downward to catch himself, sand formed where he touched, preventing the golden sand from sucking him in.

"Focus on your enemy," the Kazekage ordered at me.

I stiffened.

Shit.

I felt the sand rose around me to protect me, sensing the impact...and then heavy golden sand threw itself against me.

I heard Gaara cry out my name.

The sand was great protection. However, the golden sand was heavier than sand and as it crashed into my barrier, the sand holding firm, and I was bowled over.

I rolled with it, breathing out heavily. Damn it. Is this the extent of my abilities?

I wished I could do more, but I was not the best at offensive moves. Gaara was definitely better than me much to the surprise of everyone still.

At my encouragement, he had been training more, working out and spending time on his stamina and agility. I was also doing it, but honestly, I was a bit of a slack off, opting out to read books about chakra and ninjutsu. I could probably bore the Kazekage to death with my knowledge about the different chakra points in our bodies and what they do, how they flow, and even how to increase the flow.

I groaned, getting back up. I felt as the sand stopped attacking me. I sighed, knowing that the Kazekage was done in this specific lesson in using the sand.

Sand falling, I looked up. Gaara was at my side in an instant, his adorable face watching me with concern.

"Ki-chan," he called out softly as he reached me. I took his arm and used his weight to help myself up.

"You cannot rely solely on the sand as a shield," the Kazekage said with a frown.

"Hai," I whispered as I straightened.

The Kazekage turned his eyes to Gaara. Gaara, meeting the stern eyes once then looking away, bowed his head. The Kazekage, I saw, opened his mouth to say something, but then opted out. Instead, he turned sharply away.

"That is it for today, rest and return tomorrow for our next lesson," he said before walking away. He paused, turning his head slightly towards us.

I smiled at him as I quickly followed him, Gaara matching my strides. The Kazekage did not acknowledge us, simply turning his head forward and continuing walking when we caught up to him.

"Gaara," he said sternly.

Gaara blinked, his hands clenching at his side as he quickened his pace to stand next to our father. "Otousama?"

"Your control is of the sand allows you to move with it. Focus on using it to levitate yourself instead of stepping stones. That fall should have never happened," the Kazekage said as he continued looking forward.

Gaara nodded. "Hai, otousama."

I followed behind, hoping that the Kazekage would forget about my uselessness today. No such luck though. I saw as the Kazekage turned his head slightly towards me and our eyes met.

I smiled weakly as him, his frown deepening.

"Kinnara," he began, "you will not come training with Gaara and I tomorrow. There is someone I want you to meet."

Gaara's eyes widened a little, quickly looking at me even as I frowned. I opened my mouth to object, but at the Kazekage's stern gaze, I sealed my lips shut with an imaginary key, pretending to hand it to Gaara as I nodded. Gaara looked away from me as he stared at the ground, the rest of the walk silent.

…

**Konoha**

Kaito could not be happier.

His son was meditating next to him in their small Zen garden in the back, Hizuki's brew of his favorite jasmine tea sitting between them. This was what he loved coming home to.

Ryuu, after he and Shisui returned from their training, had gone straight to meditating and this was how Kaito had found his son. It's been over an hour, Ryuu making no sound or sign of acknowledging his father, but Kaito did not mind.

Ever since their first day of training with Ryuu's Mangekyo, Kaito has often found Ryuu meditating late into the night. When Ryuu was like this, no one could distract him.

Opening his eyes, the Uchiha clan elder reached for a cup of tea as he turned back to his young son. Kaito paused as he lifted the tea to his lips. He blinked at Ryuu before taking a sip and setting it aside.

Observing his son, Kaito thought to the boy's birth.

Kaito's heart clenched tightly, the old man placing a hand over the pounding organ as the memories came back. He remembered feeling the demonic chakra, feeling the fear as he heard about the sudden destruction of the academy.

Hizuki had been working there that day, bringing Ryuu along with her as she did not want to leave him home. Kaito's heart had broken, his mind half crazed, when he thought his wife and son gone. But when Hizuki and the squalling infant Ryuu was found with the also crying Sasuke in Itachi's arms, Kaito's whole world was transformed. It was as if the world was turned anew.

When asked what happened, Kaito was grateful to hear that due to Ryuu's non-stop crying before the Kyuubi attack, Hizuki had returned home when the Academy was destroyed.

Kaito sighed as he thought back to those memories. He did not want to even imagine what would have happened if he had lost Ryuu, much less his beloved Hizuki.

Only she could handle him, rage and all. Everyone else saw him as the Demon Eyes of the Uchiha. Only Hizuki understood him.

Since that near death experience, Kaito promised to change his ways, to shower his wife and son with love. Especially with the Kyuubi still in Konoha, simply kept at bay by seals that had once been so easily broken. The Yondaime and Sandaime were foolish to allow the demon to live.

He slowly took the cup of tea back into his hands, the warmth seeping through his fingers.

"Chichi."

At Ryuu's voice, Kaito quickly looked up, tea spilling a little. Ryuu's eyes were opened, head turned towards him and eyes on him. Kaito smiled at his son and quickly offered the second cup to him.

Ryuu looked at it for a second before reaching for it and both father and son watched as the sun fell from the sky. When night finally took over and the tea gone, Ryuu returned to meditating, becoming motionless and separated from the world.

Kaito smiled fondly at his son, preparing himself to join Ryuu in the world of obliviousness when he sensed Shisui's chakra.

"Oji-san."

One look at his nephew and Kaito froze, stiffening a little. Shisui shook his head, taking one glance at Ryuu. Kaito sighed soundlessly. Kaito nodded at Shisui, signaling for his nephew to leave.

Taking one last glance at Ryuu, Shisui left.

Shisui, at Kaito's order, had been told to observe Fugaku secretly. Kaito, ever since Itachi's admittance to ANBU, has been wary of the clan head. At first, he had been happy, but at Ryuu's urging, Kaito had begun to see the man in a different light. He could still remember when Ryuu began voicing his opinions of Fugaku.

_"What does it mean to be an Uchiha?"_

_Kaito paused at the question, eyes widening a little before he looked down at Ryuu._

_"It means to have pride in our clan. To hold still the values of clansmen and to protect our kekkei genkai."_

_Ryuu looked back up at the sky. For once, Kaito was unable to read his son. At Ryuu's next words, Kaito froze._

_"And what of Konoha? Of those who are not part of the Uchiha clan? Do we protect our kekkei genkai to protect Konoha or our pride?"_

_Kaito's eyes narrowed as he watched Ryuu, the young boy remaining calm and unemotional. It couldn't be, Kaito thought. Ryuu could not know of the coup d'état. _

_Kaito felt as anger surged within. He could only think of one person who would tell Ryuu: Fugaku._

_The clan head has more than once implied he thought Ryuu was being put to waste, that Kaito was being too light on his son. That Ryuu should be helping the coup as Itachi is._

_But he wanted Ryuu to have nothing with the coup. After Kumo, Kaito refused to let anything else happen to Ryuu even if it meant keeping his son in the dark._

_"Of course we protect Konoha," Kaito began but Ryuu, for the first time ever, interrupted his father._

_"And if Konoha wishes harm to the Uchiha clan, what then? Or the Uchiha to Konoha?" Ryuu asked, finally turning to Kaito. "Do we then chose the clan over the village or do we chose the village over the clan?"_

_Kaito was taken aback by the emotions in Ryuu's eyes. Doubt, accusation, and…sadness. But Ryuu looked away quickly, eyes closed._

_Kaito's fingers clenched as he stared at Ryuu. Shaking his head, he got up. He did not know if Ryuu knew about the coup d'état, but these questions…were too close to the topic that has been running among the Uchiha._

_When Kaito had first brought up the idea of the coup, it had been because of the Kyuubi. How Konoha was directly accusing the Uchiha of betraying them by forbidding the clan to help fight the demon. Set to do only police work…ha! _

_Then as the abuse towards the Uchiha continued, Kaito could only think of his son. _

_Anger at how the hokage had sent his son into a mission that could have killed him resurged at full and as Fugaku and others talked more of the overthrow of Konoha, Kaito finally relented. However, hearing his son speak, Kaito grew uncomfortable._

_"We will speak no more of this," Kaito said, regretting instantly at the sternness in his voice._

_But Ryuu made no reaction, no sound. The two stood in mute silence before Kaito sighed. He tried once more._

_"Ryuu," he whispered as he laid a hand on Ryuu's shoulder. "What has brought this on?"_

_There was a moment of pause, as if Ryuu was thinking._

_"People have been questioning my friendship with Haru."_

_Kaito felt as his whole body relax. Oh. He felt as relief overcame him, his chest relaxing. It was about the Hyuuga. Not the coup d'état. Breathing out heavily, Kaito patted Ryuu on the shoulder._

_"Your friendship with the Hyuuga is no one's concern but your own, Ryuu," Kaito whispered._

_"What is the different between the Hyuuga and Uchiha if we are all part of Konoha, then," Ryuu asked softly._

_Kaito stiffened at the question. While he did not like the Hyuuga, for they look down upon the Uchiha, he loved his son and if Ryuu wished to be friends with the Hyuuga Heir, who is he to deny his son happiness. _

_But the difference?_

_Kaito frowned. He opened his mouth, but Ryuu continued._

_"I see the way people look at me. When I am alone or when I am with Haru. Why do they hate the Uchiha? Why do the Hyuugas look down upon us?" Ryuu raised his head, eyes turned skywards. "What makes us so different? Are we not all shinobis of Konoha?"_

_Kaito closed his mouth, thinking over the questions. The difference was that they were **clans**. Clans chose to be part of Konoha. They can easily chose to leave. The corruption of power within Konoha was the reason for the slow declining power of the Uchiha._

_Kaito's eyes closed at the thought._ _The coup d'état was the only way. It was—_

_"I want to be friends with Haru without being scolded for it."_

_Kaito's fingers clenched. "Scolded? Who has scolded you?"_

_Who **dared** to scold his son?!_

_Ryuu did not hesitate. "Fugaku-sama."_

_Kaito's eyes widened. Fugaku? _

_Frowning, Kaito breathed out slowly. Kaito has never once scolded or lectured Itachi and Sasuke, respecting Fugaku as their father. For Fugaku to blatantly scold Ryuu, though?_

_"I do not like Fugaku's desire for power, chichi," Ryuu whispered, surprising Kaito once more, "I believe that it will only lead the Uchiha to a path of destruction."_

_Kaito froze at this, eyes blinking at Ryuu. "What do you mean, Ryuu?"_

_Ryuu seemed to shrug seamlessly, looking away. "He told me that to befriend a Hyuuga is a disgrace as they have become like 'dogs' to Konoha. That the Byakugan cannot match the Sharingan because it has been tamed, by the bird seal and by Konoha. Is it bad to be loyal to our village?"_

_Our village…ours. Kaito swallowed._

_"Ryuu," he began, studying his son, "leave Fugaku to me. Be friends with Haru if it makes you happy."_

_Ryuu turned back to him, genuine shock on his face. Kaito was kind of surprised as he has not seen that look on Ryuu's face since…well, since Kumo. But it was gone as quickly as it came. Ryuu nodded, smiling softly._

_"Thank you, chichi, for allowing me to make my own choices."_

_Kaito, smiling, reached out and rubbed his son's head affectionately. Kaito truly could not imagine a world without his son._

Kaito sighed.

And because of this, he could not ignore Fugaku anymore.

Fugaku was not up to be the leader of the clan. Itachi, now part of ANBU, could not be fully trusted either. Kaito would not be surprised if Itachi was a double spy for Konoha even though it was Fugaku's idea to plant Itachi as a spy for the Uchiha to Konoha.

At first, Kaito thought it was a good idea, but the old man is only now realizing how foolish the decision was. What was to keep Itachi from betraying them? Fugaku, while loyal to the clan, was also loyal to his thirst for power. He has already willingly used his son and Kaito could not imagine using Ryuu in the way Fugaku has.

His son, his precious son. Already, Kumo has changed Ryuu, the boy no longer the bright little child he once was. Kaito knew being a shinobi was hard, but he had always thought that as long as he and Hizuki along with Shisui was there, Ryuu would remain strong.

Ryuu was strong for a shinobi, but the boy no longer laughed the same. He no longer smiled as bright as he once did. Whatever happened in Kumo, changed the boy.

Maybe Fugaku was right and Kaito did raise the boy too soft, but to do the opposite to his only child, a child that was Hizuki's miracle to him, a man past his primes to be a father…no. Kaito could not raise Ryuu as Fugaku raised Itachi and Sasuke.

Kaito truly regretted so carelessly advising Fugaku to send Itachi to war. Imagining his son, his Ryuu, at the tender age of four fighting in a war…Kaito shivered.

Kaito could not imagine placing Ryuu in a war, much less for the Uchiha to gain power.

He had thought about it, about Ryuu's questioning of what a clan is and what a village is. More than once, Ryuu has called Konoha his home, expressed his admiration for the Hokages. How could Kaito wish to destroy the home that his son so admired?

Which was why Kaito refused to let Ryuu near clan meetings. Sasuke was also kept in the dark at Mikoto's desire when Fugaku commented on how Sasuke was now old enough to know about the coup.

The two were too young. Especially since clan meetings have consisted of discussion and planning of the coup d'état.

Kaito was growing afraid that Fugaku was becoming careless in his enactment of the coup. Kaito was beginning to doubt the coup. Sure, he was one of the elders who had given birth to the idea, but now that Fugaku was truly trying to enact it, Kaito was not so sure anymore.

Kaito loved his son too much to place Ryuu's future in the careless hands of Fugaku, the very man so willing to sacrifice his son. The man had two sons, luck of all luck, yet he was willing to place one in the dens of wolves and neglect the other.

More than once, Ryuu had asked Kaito about Sasuke's treatment, something Kaito would have overlooked, but at his son's urging, Kaito looked more in on it. And true enough, Kaito was beginning to understand Ryuu's dislike of Fugaku.

He sighed. He hated that he had helped a man like Fugaku as head. Kaito should have taken the role when Fugaku's father died, as everyone had wanted. But Kaito, desiring to uphold tradition, placed Fugaku as head.

Now though…

Clearing his throat, Kaito turned to Ryuu. Was the coup worth the peace his son was now living?

…

**/The next Morning\**

Minori's onyx eyes furrowed together as she looked quizzically at Itachi's disappearing form. She sighed softly to herself. She was angry at him for leaving so soon, but the burning sensation of Itachi's kiss still lingered, her face warm.

Fingers touching her lips, Minori turned away and headed home.

Itachi and she could not meet up in Konoha, so whenever he had time, they would meet by the training grounds and do what any shinobi couple did: train together with the occasional kisses and touches. A secret relationship was not that hard to hide, especially when both of the people in it are shinobi and one of them was Uchiha Itachi.

She frowned slightly at the thought of her boyfriend (or lover and what other names one has for a romantic relationship. Itachi never truly classified what relationship they had). Itachi, while he was polite when they met outside of their personal time together, ignored her mostly. They both understood though.

Fugaku would forbid Itachi to be with her, not wanting any distraction for Itachi's training and missions. It doesn't help that Fugaku thought that Minori, an orphan Uchiha whose father died in the war and her mother from outside the clan, was undeserving of his son.

No one knew about their relationship. But Minori did not mind.

She enjoyed the more playful and teasing Itachi that was hers and hers alone. But it would be nice to be able to introduce herself to Itachi's mother. She looked up greatly to the matriarch of the Uchiha clan.

However, Itachi was a popular guy. He had loads of girls after him and keeping their relationship a secret prevented her from being a target from rapid fan girls. Not that she needed to be protected. But Itachi obviously thought she did.

She sighed at the thought of her overprotective secret boyfriend.

Minori continued down the path that intersected with training ground seven, eyes narrowing as she heard steps. She did not stop her slow pace though, but her eyes did relax when the familiar faces appeared.

She smiled gently at the two younger boys.

"Haru-san, Ryuu-kun," she greeted as she stopped at where their paths met. "How was training today?"

Haru smiled at her, Minori having to fight off the confusion. She was slowly getting used to seeing Hyuuga Haru and Uchiha Ryuu together. However, seeing a Hyuuga smile with their Byakugan was something she had to get used to.

Ryuu though, Minori glanced at him, simply nodded at her with only a small smile on his lips. Minori returned his small smile with a fond one. Even though they were eight years apart (Minori has two years over Itachi) Ryuu and Minori have always shared a special relationship.

She was Shisui's best friend and ever since the mission to Kumo, Ryuu has been more attentive to her. At first, Minori was confused, thinking it was a childish crush, but she soon realized that it wasn't.

In fact, everyone has noticed the difference in Ryuu.

As a child, adored and cherished by everyone and hailed as the prodigy of the clan, Ryuu was quite spoiled, but he was humble about it. She's still amazed that such a well-behaved and kind child was the legacy of Uchiha Kaito's son. Uchiha Kaito, the Demon Eyes of Konoha. The name certainly wasn't for his compassion.

Even his wife, Minori saw at times, was afraid of her husband. But everyone in the clan knew of Kaito's soft spot for his wife. However, no one had expected the way a child would change the once cold man. Kaito's sudden change in personality was dually noted. Along with Ryuu's.

Like father like son, I guess, she thought.

Ryuu, before the mission, had always been a bright and happy child. He made everyone smile. It must have been an influence of Shisui, but Minori also knew differently. His brightness and glow came from Hizuki, but that brightness is all but gone now. He was not cruel or mean or even cold…he was just different.

Everyone could see it.

She still couldn't figure out what happened, but she assumed it must have something to do with Ryuu's first mission as a Chunin to Kumo. His personality not only changed, but his interactions too.

Before Kumo, Ryuu and Minori were acquaintances who shared a close bond with Shisui. The two would pass each other and simply smile at one another.

For the past year though, Ryuu has been attentive to her and has even begun training with her. She could feel his confusion sometimes though when he trained with her or watched her, thinking she didn't see. She noticed though, but has decided to keep everything on the low.

She simply wanted to train with him.

Sometimes, Haru would join them and at first, she was confused at the relationship between the Hyuuga heir and Uchiha prodigy, but Shisui simply told her to just accept it. So she did. Itachi had no comment on it so she guessed nothing was wrong with it. But it was still strange though.

"Minori-chan," Haru greeted her, snapping her away from her thoughts and breaking her glance with Ryuu. "Are you heading home now?"

"Hai. It's been a long day," she responded as they caught up to her.

She noticed how the two boys, as they reached her, fell to one side of her. Haru strolled leisurely to her left as Ryuu silently glided at her right, his hands locked behind his back and head staring straight ahead.

"Were you training with Itachi?"

Minori tensed up at Ryuu's question, her eyes quickly glancing at him. Ryuu though, was still staring up ahead, a nonchalant expression on his face. Minori's eyes looked away.

"What makes you think that?"

Ryuu shrugged. "I was just wondering. I felt his chakra in proximity to yours. I just assumed the two of you were together."

Minori frowned.

Ryuu was young and he was a prodigy, but the fact that he could recognize and read chakra signature was something that even Itachi was struggling with. Someone with that skill has to be very sensitive to chakra.

She would not have been surprised if Haru asked, but Ryuu?

She shrugged. "No, I didn't see him at all."

There was a moment of pause before Haru spoke, but his words were not understandable. Minori fought the urge to roll her eyes when Ryuu replied back in their gibberish language.

She had walked this path many times with the two and she was used to their strange language. She was impressed by their ability to speak in code, a language only the two knew, but it could get annoying.

…

**~Xen~**

Su (Haru), at Minori's words, turned to me and spoke to me in Hmong.

"Why are you asking her if she was with Itachi," he asked innocently.

I shrugged and replied in Hmong, "I wanted to see if she would admit that they're going out".

Haru tripped then, causing Minori and me to pause as the Hyuuga heir fell on his face. Quickly moving, I blocked him from Minori's view.

"What?!"

I ignored his reaction, and quickly apologized to Minori. I knew he was really distressed because he was speaking in English now, not Hmong. Hmong was the language we used whenever we wanted to mess with everyone because as an Asian language, Hmong had similar tones to Japanese. English though, was truly a different language compared to Japanese.

We rarely used it. I knew he only used it when he wanted to speak to me alone and couldn't control his nerves.

Before Minori could do or say anything, I dragged Haru away. When I could no longer feel her chakra, having traveled a few miles away, I finally stopped. When I let him go, Haru was still staring at me in shock.

"Itachi has a lover?!"

I shrugged. "Kishimoto never made it clear. He never defined who she was, just that Itachi was popular and could have had a girl. But Shisui confirmed it to me a while back when the two finally got together."

"Itachi's lover?"

He was starting to sound like a broken record now. I finally sighed at him. Turning stern eyes to him, I said his name once in Hmong.

"Su."

Haru, at my tone, frowned and stopped talking. Crossing his arms, I smirked a little at how much he looked like Neji. I opened my mouth to tell him this, but he spoke first.

"I can't allow you to continue with your plan anymore."

My smirk fell.

Standing up, I flexed my fingers, cracking them at the same time. Haru flinched at the sound, but remained stern in his stance and scowl. I watched him carefully. Su has always been such a gentle spirit…even as Haru, he still is. I looked away, down at his feet.

"What changed your mind?"

Haru sighed loudly, grunting in frustration. His frustration showed even more as he replied to me in Hmong, slipping to our old language.

"You act as if these people aren't real. That Kaito and Hizuki are not your parents and that Sasuke is not your best friend. That Minori is not real! This world is real and these people are real. There has to be another way!"

I shook my head, cracking my neck as I stretched my muscles out.

"It's not that simple. We cannot change the timeline—"

"And why not?!"

I quickly glared at him, silencing him. "The only advantage we have is our knowledge of the future. If we change that even just a little, we have nothing."

Haru's fingers clenched as he uncrossed his arms.

"Are you seriously using that as an excuse?" He threw his arms in the air. "Then what the hell are we? Non-existent in this timeline?! You think our presence has not changed anything?!"

I frowned at his words. "We cannot allow for things to change even more than it has."

"So you're going to do it? Allow the Uchiha clan to die out and leave Sasuke to suffer alone?"

"He'll have me," I replied softly, but Haru only grew angrier.

"That's not the same! What the hell is wrong with you, Ceevn?!"

I flinched at his use of my name in Hmong.

_Ceevn. _

No one…has used that name in a long time. I couldn't look at him, reflecting on his words. What was wrong with me?

Simple.

Those people were necessary sacrifices. The Uchiha clan cannot exist. I cannot control them. I have no way of knowing how they would affect Konoha.

Was it cruel of me?

Yes. But…

"Life is cruel," I whispered softly to Haru.

He froze at my words. "What the hell, Ceevn?"

His voice was breathless, confused at my words and sudden change of demeanor. I shrugged once more, moving away from him and packing up the weights. I knew that Haru did not like the way I think.

Even if he is a shinobi and has killed before, Haru is still Su, the boy who lived in a world that did not see death every day or faced danger at every corner. As Haru and the Hyuuga heir, he is and has always been well protected.

To him, killing was only done if it were the 'bad guys' and as a last resort.

Those kind of thoughts though…were naive and ignorant to the evils of the world: both worlds.

I felt as my fingers tightened on my pack, Haru's steps quickly following me as I left him behind. I ignored him though even as he called me, trying to get my attention.

How do I explain to him when I have already lied to him about my life?

He still thinks I was a simple doctor, someone who saved lives. How wrong that picture was though. I saw the looks Haru threw me sometimes when I said something "dark" or "depressing" as he has called it.

There is darkness in all of us. Danzo has it, Naruto…Itachi. Me. Even Haru.

Some of us are better at fighting it like Haru and Naruto. But Danzo and Itachi understood me the most when it comes to sacrifices and the handling of evils in the world.

Danzo, even if foolish and selfish in his actions to achieve peace and stability, at least understood that if one is to win at all, there has to be death. Someway to get rid of those in the way. Itachi, as a pacifist and a child of kindness, became a demon to protect those he loved. Even if it meant destroying part of what he loved, part of himself, and his life.

The world is a cruel place.

Itachi and Danzo both understood this.

I understood this.

You leave the light to those who have yet to experience the cruelty. You allow them to be the good guy in everyone's eyes. But there has to be the bad guy in order for there to be a good one. Itachi understood this the most. Itachi understood what it meant to be the hero everyone needed…even if it meant becoming the villain.

I stopped in my tracks. Haru stopping with me, calling my name in Hmong once more.

"Do you honestly think…this is not affecting me either? I…I don't want to do this anymore than you do."

There was a moment of silence, Haru trying to decipher my tone and my words. When he finally spoke again, I flinched.

"Then don't do this. Don't let them die."

But it isn't that simple. I clenched my teeth. It couldn't be.

If it was that simple, Itachi wouldn't have done what he did. If it was that simple, Obito would not be the one playing Madara. If the world was that simple…there would be no Rins or Hizashis because we wouldn't need sacrifices. There would be no Minatos or Kushina because we wouldn't need to have people give up their lives.

There would be no Tsunades, Sasuskes, and Kakashis…the ones left behind and left to pick up the pieces of their broken hearts.

There wouldn't be people like Jiraya and Sakura, people chasing after their broken loved ones with no hope.

If the world was simple…the world would be a better place.

"Stop."

I blinked. Turning to him, I saw his sadness, the sudden tears forming in his eyes. My fingers clenched.

"Get rid of that look on your face! Every time you look like that, I know you're thinking bad thoughts! Just stop thinking and do what you want."

"Haru," I began, but he cut me off, eyes fierce even with tears falling.

"You don't have to be in control of everything. You don't have to save everyone," Haru whispered. "I know you want to believe logic is the best way to live, but...Xen, nothing about being human is logical. You **_can't_ **save everyone."

I froze at his words, body stiffening.

"Itachi's only thirteen! Sasuke is seven—_you're_ seven!" Haru shook as he grabbed me, my eyes trying to look at anywhere but his, "damn it, look at me!"

I clenched my jaws, finally meeting his eyes.

"Promise me! Promise that you will try to stop the massacre. Don't put yourself through this…don't put Sasuke and Itachi through it. You don't have to live like this. Please!"

I stared at him. He stared back at me.

For once, in a long time, I felt guilty as I nodded. At the relief look in his eyes, I cursed myself.

I truly was a monster.

I'm sorry Su.

* * *

><p><strong>It's been three months since the Academy Entrance Exam and three months since Itachi joined ANBU<strong>

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><p><strong>~TBC~<strong>

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><p><em>AN: I am a bit late to posting this chapter, but better late than never._

_**Ceevn is the Hmong spelling of Xen. Xen is just an English form of Ceevn...because well, how many of you know how to read Ceevn?**_

_I am splitting the Uchiha Massacre into parts. Mostly because I need to explain what is happening as THIS IS AN IMPORTANT PART OF THIS STORY. In other SIOC, the Uchiha Massacre happens without ceremony. No one actually wants or even knows how to stop it. Well...we shall all see what Xen is trying to do. Maybe you will hate me. Maybe you won't._

_P.S. I had to add Minori. I mean, Itachi had a lover. Who was obviously an Uchiha because she was "killed" by Itachi as Obito told Sasuke. Should I keep her? Throw her away? I may just rewrite this chapter._

_**Thank you for the support, the reviews, the favs/follows. I hope my fanfic is worthy of your time**_

_**...Until Next Time...**_


	11. Uchiha Massacre 2

_**Disclaimer: **I disclaim Naruto_.

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><p><strong><em><strong><em>"We are all the pieces of what we remember. We hold in ourselves the hopes and fears of those who love us..." – Cassandra Clare<em>**_**

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><p><em><strong>11 - Uchiha Massacre Pt. 2<strong>_

**_/One Month Later\_**

**Konoha**

Itachi frowned.

The Uchiha, at Kaito's urging, were having a clan gathering. A celebration of sorts. Fugaku stood next to the elder, Kaito smiling politely next to the head of the clan.

Fugaku's signature emotionless stern face contrasted dramatically from Kaito's laughing one. Hizuki was with her niece, Mikoto laughing with Hizuki at something that had just been said between the two.

The two women just entered the house, their disappearance noticed only briefly by Itachi as he was still frowning at the scene before him.

Sasuke was with Ryuu, as always. But that wasn't what was bothering Itachi.

No.

What bothered the thirteen year old ANBU assassin double agent…was that the girl he has been keeping a secret was with them. More precise, Ryuu was introducing Minori to Sasuke.

Shisui nudged him.

"Don't look like that," Shisui whispered, smirking almost, "it's not so bad that they are finally meeting. Did you think you could keep her away from Sasuke forever?"

Itachi made no reply, only with a simple: "Hn."

Shisui, at his lack of response, shook his head, laughing inwardly at his best friend. He patted Itachi on the shoulder, leaving the younger boy as someone asked for him. Alone, Itachi continued to frown at the trio that was across from him, other Uchihas between them.

Uchiha Minori.

She was the daughter to an Uchiha who defected from the clan and married an outsider. When she was orphaned by the Kyuubi attack, Fugaku and the council of elders had decided to take her in, especially with the awakening of her sharingan. She had only been eight and he, six.

Itachi quickly lost the frown as Minori caught his eyes. He stared back at her emotionlessly, her eyes showing no emotion even as he caught the hesitance on her face. He looked away, straightening and headed towards them.

…

Minori felt shaken as Itachi headed towards them. She had wanted to avoid meeting Sasuke. She knew how much Sasuke meant to Itachi and that he has explicitly told her that keeping their relationship a secret, meant exactly that. A secret.

Thus she had to be a secret.

However, when Ryuu suddenly appeared in front of her, demanding that she meet someone, she had innocently followed. When they had approached Sasuke, it was already too late. The boy had spotted her, surprising Minori at how tuned Sasuke was to Ryuu.

Ryuu and Sasuke, to Minori's surprise, were really close.

"Ne, Ryuu-nii," Sasuke asked innocently, seeming to hide behind Ryuu as he looked up at Minori. "Who is she?"

Minori blinked. The Uchiha was a small clan, everyone knew everyone. Except her. She was always kept in the background.

Ryuu nudged shoulders with Sasuke. "Hey, be polite. This is Minori-chan."

Sasuke nodded, bowing his head slightly towards her.

"Hajime mashite," Sasuke whispered. "Yoroshiku onegaishimasu, Minori-san."

Minori greeted him back, whispering the same words.

"Sasuke."

All three, Minori having already sensed his presence, turned to Itachi. Sasuke, at his brother's appearance seemed to brighten up even more, jumping from Ryuu to Itachi.

"Nii-san," Sasuke exclaimed. "You made it!"

"Yes. I finished the mission early."

Sasuke grabbed Itachi's hand, bringing him over to Ryuu and Minori. Itachi looked only at Sasuke, smiling at Ryuu.

"Hello, Ryuu," Itachi greeted.

Minori fought the urge to hide as Itachi finally turned to her.

"Minori-san," Itachi whispered, nodding towards her.

"Itachi-san," Minori replied in the same monotonic voice.

Sasuke looked between the two, confused. "You know Minori-san? I have never seen her before."

Itachi turned to Sasuke. "Sasuke, why don't you go find hahaue."

Sasuke frowned. "But—"

"Sasuke," Ryuu said softly, going up to his friend and taking him by the shoulder, "I think I saw Mikoto-san with haha earlier. Let's go!"

Sasuke, after frowning at Itachi, nodded. He turned to Minori.

"Ja ne, Minori-san."

"Ja ne," Minori whispered, her voice trailing off as the two seven year old suddenly left.

Itachi turned to her, Minori meeting his eyes. She glanced briefly at Fugaku, the head being distracted by Kaito. Slowly, Itachi walked off without saying anything and Minori, after a few seconds followed him.

Itachi made no acknowledgment as Minori followed him into Hizuki's and Kaito's home. Shisui, spotting the two, indicated towards the backroom. Itachi curtly nodded and slipped away. Minori, after looking around, followed.

When the door slid closed behind her, Itachi finally turned to her, his usually emotionless face, holding slight frustration.

"I thought you weren't coming."

Minori sighed. "And I thought you couldn't make it."

Itachi sighed too. "You should have avoided Sasuke."

"I was," Minori replied softly, "but if I had known that the person Ryuu-kun wanted me to meet had been Sasuke-kun, I wouldn't have followed him."

Itachi frowned, eyes furrowed. "You knew that the two were close."

"No," Minori stressed slowly as she studied her boyfriend, "I don't. I know nothing about your family and the only people I see Ryuu around with are Shisui and Haru-san. It never occurred to me that Sasuke-kun and Ryuu-kun would be so close."

Itachi closed his eyes, nodding. "What changed your mind in coming then?"

"Ryuu-kun."

Itachi's eyes snapped open, his frown deepening. "Ryuu?"

Minori nodded. There was a moment of silence as Itachi took this in.

Then without warning, he said, "You should stay away from Ryuu."

"What?" Minori finally frowned, her eyes sharpening. "Why?"

Itachi shook his head. "You know that Kaito does not want Ryuu to know about the coup d'état. It is better if he and Sasuke are left alone and in the dark."

"Don't you mean that I should stay away from Ryuu because it will lower my chances of meeting Sasuke? Like today?"

Itachi blinked at her, their eyes meeting. Unlike all the Uchiha, Minori's eyes were a light gray, eyes from her mother.

"Minori," Itachi began, but she shook her head.

"I want our relationship to continue being hidden also, but I do not think any interaction with your family will harm that secrecy. No one but Shisui knows, Itachi. Our relationship won't be exposed just because Sasuke knows my name."

Itachi made no reply, jaw clenching slightly. Minori slowly made her way to him, her fingers reaching up. Itachi closed his eyes as her fingers kissed his cheek. Even though she was two years older, he was a good four inches taller.

"Itachi, what is it that you are afraid of? You've been acting weird lately."

Itachi opened his eyes, the onyx meeting gray. "It is nothing."

She frowned. But before she could say anything else, there was a sudden loud cough from outside the sliding door. Itachi and Minori turned as one towards the noise. The two broke apart as Shisui's voice led a guest away from the room.

Itachi, without another glance at her, left. Used to the routine, Minori knew she had to wait five minutes before leaving also. But she couldn't help the way her heart clenched as Itachi left her behind without even looking back, the door sliding shut.

…

**Suna**

Chiyo stared at the little girl in front of her. Ebizo's head was cocked to the side in confusion, his heavy lidded eyes studying at the scene before him.

"What," the retired kunoichi began warily, "are you doing?"

"Painting," came the chirpy reply.

Ebizo coughed into his hand. Turning to his sister, he saw the way she scowled at the youngest of the Kazekage's children.

"Nee-chan," he began, noticing the familiar irk in her eyes. He had to calm her down before she blew, but it was too late.

"Painting?!" Chiyo pointed her finger accusingly at Kinnara. "You are supposed to be meditating! How will you ever learn how to control your chakra if you cannot even control your body and mind?!"

Ebizo sighed as Chiyo fumed at the girl who, in return, only stared at his sister with blank confused eyes. It has been a while since anyone has been able to get on this side of his sister.

The girl, while strikingly identical to her gentle mother in looks, was vastly different from both her parents. The Kazekage himself was a quiet and stern man. Karura had been a quiet and gentle woman. Kinnara though…was an interesting child born from two soft spoken people.

"But, painting can be meditating," Kinnara explained as she set aside the paint brush. "It helps me relax."

Chiyo glared at her. "Kinnara-sama!"

"Nee-chan," Ebizo said calmly as he patted Chiyo on the shoulder, "if she finds the activity relaxing, let her do so."

"Painting is not going to help her control her chakra," Chiyo muttered as she sighed. "Kinnara-sama, please, try once more to meditate."

Kinnara sighed. "It's boring though. I'm too young to be meditating, it's an old person thing."

Ebizo sighed as Kinnara's comment only set Chiyo off again. He stepped aside as Chiyo tried to grab for the little girl who surprisingly evaded the old woman. Soon, Chiyo was chasing her out of the room. Ebizo quickly followed.

…

Gaara watched as Kankuro and Temari worked together as they dodged their father's attack. Temari used her fan to create a whirlwind that sent the golden sand flying as Kankuro's puppet created a barrier to protect the two from the sand beneath them.

The Kazekage lowered the sand, turning to Gaara.

"Their teamwork works only because they understand the strengths and weaknesses of each other. Continue to observe them."

Gaara nodded, eyes going back to his older siblings, the two smiling at him. Kankuro nodded towards him as Temari winked. Gaara, at their attention, blushed nodding back at them.

The two went back into their fighting stance, Temari's fan out and ready as Kankuro's fingers raised high, strings on his puppets. Gaara held his breath, waiting to see how their father would attack this time.

But there was no next time.

Instead, when the Kazekage shifted forward to make his move, he froze. The three children paused as their father's concentrated and emotionless face suddenly transformed into one of frustration and annoyance. The three quickly turned towards where the Kazekage had been looking and all three deadpanned.

In the air above the village, was a single island of sand. Sadly, everyone knew who it was. And even more sadly, everyone knew the familiar old woman jumping from roof to roof trying to get the girl flying above Suna.

Gaara sighed.

…

**/Two Hours Later\**

"The way she was using the sand signified strong control of chakra," Ebizo explained to the Kazekage. "But she has not been responding well to the techniques we have been trying to teach her."

"She hasn't been responding at all," Chiyo muttered as she crossed her arms, huffing. "If she could show the control she had two hours ago for every training we have given her, we wouldn't be needed!"

The Kazekage sighed. "I am truly sorry for the trouble Kinnara has caused the two of you."

"No trouble at all," Ebizo said even as Chiyo exclaimed, "She's a demon!"

Yashamaru fought the laugh, quickly clearing his throat when the Kazekage turned sharp eyes to him. Turning back to the two elders, the Kazekage looked at them apologetically.

"If you no longer wish to take Kinnara under your tutelage, I can understand. I will find a new—"

"You have already called us back to train her," Chiyo grumbled as she straightened, turning sharp eyes to the Kazekage. "Do you think we are too old to handle one little girl?"

"That is not my implication," the Kazekage tried to explain, but Chiyo interrupted him.

"Kazekage-sama," she began, "while Kinnara-sama is troublesome, she shows great potential to become a suitable medical kunoichi for Sunagakure. And," Chiyo's voice became serious, "have you any idea why Kinnara-sama has been keeping her abilities hidden?"

Yashamaru and the Kazekage paused, the two staring at Chiyo. Ebizo, having already had this discussion with her, simply nodded.

"Hidden? Kinnara has never shown any skills in ninjutsu," the Kazekage said impatiently. "It is why I have asked the two of you to return to assess if it was Shukaku or the seal that was limiting her abilities and chakra control."

Chiyo and Ebizo shared a glance before Ebizo turned back to the Kazekage.

"You told us your concerns in the beginning, but what we found after a month of observing the child is that she actually exceeds the abilities of even Gaara-sama in chakra manipulation and control."

"The very fact that she escaped me for two hours prove that she is quite well trained in controlling and manipulating her chakra and the sand," Chiyo said sharply. "Yet when we train, she shows no signs of these skills. It is obvious that she is hiding them and using them."

The Kazekage frowned. Yashamaru's eyes sharpened at their words, losing himself deep in thought. The Kazekage shook his head in disbelief, eyes stern.

"That cannot be. I have trained with her and Gaara for the past year. I have seen no such control from her."

"But she has it," Ebizo said softly. "And she is quite good with it. With enough training, she will rival that of nee-chan."

"You are telling me," the Kazekage said gruffly, "that my daughter has been keeping her abilities from me?"

Chiyo and Ebizo nodded, the old woman cackling.

"To think she can hide her skills even from you," she said, "maybe I am not the only senile one."

The Kazekage ignored her, turning sharply to Yashamaru. At his name, the young man snapped out of his thoughts and tuned back into the conversation.

"Kazekage-sama?"

"What do you know of this," the Kazekage snapped.

Yashamaru straightened as everyone turned to him.

"I do not know either," Yashamaru answered softly, head bowed. "But I will talk to her."

The Kazekage nodded, looking down at the papers on his desk. "Do so and report back to me tomorrow."

Yashamaru nodded, quickly leaving. Chiyo and Ebizo watched him leave before turning back to the Kazekage. The Kazekage turned back to them.

"Yashamaru-san has taken well to the twins," Chiyo mused. "How has he been without Karura-sama?"

Everyone in Suna knew of the two siblings. Karura doted on Yashamaru and Yashamaru adored his older sister. When Karura married the Kazekage, it had shocked everyone. The Kazekage was not known for his charms and Karura seemed to never have any interests in any men but her younger brother.

When Karura had died, Yashamaru was left devastated. Chiyo felt personally responsible for the death and as soon as she could, retired. Ebizo followed and the two left. They would have stayed away too if Yashamaru himself had not come to retrieve them.

Chiyo looked blankly down at the Kazekage's desk. She understood what it felt like to lose someone you dearly loved. If Kinnara had not been Karura's daughter, Chiyo would have ignored the Kazekage's request.

"He is healing," the Kazekage whispered, leaning back, "as is everyone. The twins…have been a good influence on him."

"That is good to hear," Ebizo said as he nodded slowly. "Yashamaru is a kind child. He deserves to be happy. It is just sad that Karura-sama is not here to see her children grow."

The Kazekage made no comment, eyes lowering and his stern face relaxing.

"Karura would be happy to know," he said softly, "that the twins are being taken care of by Yashamaru."

The two elders nodded, all lost in thought of those they had loved.

…

**_~Kinnara~_**

I sighed as Gaara frowned at me. He was rarely ever mad at me. So having him frown at me was always bad.

"Kinnara."

Okay, even worse sign.

"Gaara," I said slowly, twisting my hands. "I'm sorry?"

He sighed, frown disappearing. "You promised me that you would try."

"I am," I exclaimed, arms lifting.

"Forcing Chiyo-baasama to chase you is trying," Kankuro muttered under his breath, chuckling. "Really, Kinnara?"

I grinned sheepishly at him.

"Oh give it break," Temari snapped at Kankuro as she turned to me. "It's amazing that you were able to avoid her for two hours though."

"I can't help that she wants me to do old people things."

"You said that to her," Kankuro and Temari both said at once, shocked.

"You called Chiyo-baasama old?"

"Old," Kankuro echoed Temari as the two shared a glance.

I sighed. "Okay, so maybe I shouldn't have. But I can't meditate. Sitting around without doing anything is so…boring."

"But Ki," Gaara pulled on my arm. "If you don't get better, otousama is going to send you away."

His bottom lips quivered.

Kankuro rubbed his eyes as Temari came to Gaara's other side, wrapping an arm around his shoulder. She gave me a look before looking down at Gaara.

"It's okay Gaara. Otousan won't send Kinnara away."

"Yea, no one would want her."

Temari and I glared at him, Kankuro ducking his head. I turned back to Gaara, frowning.

"Why do you think otousan will send me away?"

"He told me he would," Gaara mumbled as he hid his head in Temari's shoulder.

I blinked. Wha?!

"He said that? When did he say this?" Seriously, I said to myself after saying that out loud.

Temari sighed as she grabbed me with her other arm, pushing my face into her pre-teen adolescent chest.

"Okay, I'm sure Gaara just misunderstood otousan and Kinnara, you should stop fooling around. The fact that Chiyo-baasama and Ebizo-jiisama are willing to take time away from their retirement just to train you means a lot."

"Yea," Kankuro said as he came up to us, awkwardly patting Gaara's and my back, "you should be honored to be taught by them. I know you have issues with authority, Kinnara—" I stuck my tongue out at him, but he ignored it and continued on as if I hadn't done it–"but for once, can you just do this. For Gaara?"

"For us," Temari added gently as she looked down at me.

I looked away, hiding my head against Temari's arm.

How do I explain this to them?

That I did not want to fight. I was doing everything in my power to be discredited and thus kick out from being a shinobi. But so far, everyone has just been telling me to work harder.

When Chiyo and Ebizo started training me, I was scared. Scared of being found out. I knew that Chiyo and Ebizo would be harder to lie to. With the Kazekage, I simply used his frustration with my attachment to Gaara.

As good as my father has become, he still thinks that Gaara and I should stand on our own two feet without each other. That we should be strong without one another if need be. It was easy to get him riled up by simply acting like myself: protective of Gaara even if it meant putting myself at risk.

Chiyo and Ebizo though…Chiyo was easy to rile up. Ebizo, he was just a mystery.

I lifted my head.

"I'll try," I whispered.

Kankuro sighed, nodding. "Alright. Please, don't let us have another repeat of today. Otousan almost didn't let us go from training. He was that frustrated with you."

And that meant he or Yashamaru will be talking to me soon. Sighing, I nodded also. Temari let Gaara and I go, grabbing her fan. She went to Kankuro's side, looking back at us.

"You two take care. Kankuro and I have to continue with our training. If we have time, we'll come to dinner."

Kankuro nodded at us and left first, Temari followed after him.

Gaara looked at me. I sighed.

"I know."

"Will you behave better tomorrow?"

"Yes."

He frowned. "Promise?"

I sighed once more. "Yes, I promise. I, Kinnara of the Sand, promise you, Gaara—"

"Okay, okay," he giggled as he smiled gently at me. "If you promise, you promise. Let's go, Ki. Yashamaru must be waiting for us at home."

Home…for him to say that. For him to be so relaxed with our siblings and our father. My lips smiled widely, so much that it hurt.

"Yea, okay."

I took his outreached hand, warm fingers wrapping around mine, as he led me home. Looking after him, I felt happy. Even though everyone was disappointed in me for not taking my training seriously, Gaara never was. He was upset that I was causing everyone trouble, but he never asked me to learn better.

No, he just wanted me to behave better. I guess, he still has the fear that we could get separated or that he would lose me.

My fingers tightened around his. At the pressure, he turned to me in surprise, but I only smiled. Quickening my pace, I walked beside him, knocking out shoulders.

Gaara only smiled back, the two of us heading home together.

…

**Konoha**

**~Xen~**

I sighed as I slipped the mask off, looking towards the hokage monument and the hokage residence. Staring at the fire symbol, I looked down at the mask.

I bought the mask earlier when I realized I needed to interact with Naruto. Only, I didn't want Naruto to know me yet.

Not yet…

I've limited myself to interacting with Naruto for only twice a week for the past four months. At first, Naruto pestered me like crazy about who I was, but after threatening to never show up again if he didn't stop, Naruto finally relented.

Although it was a game of his to try and take my mask off. Good thing that Naruto is so weak and slow in his current state.

Slowly, I slipped the "damn" mask, as Naruto so fondly refer to it as, off along with the robe, hiding them under the floor board. There was a sudden knocking on my screen door. Silently lowering the board, I stood up.

Eyes glancing at the floorboard of my double life, I quickly straightened.

"Come in," I called out as I walked towards my draw, as if searching for something.

Shisui appeared as the screen opened, his eyes smiling at me. I returned the look, genuinely happy to see him.

"Shi-kun, is everyone gone?"

"Everyone's gone. Oji-san and Oba-san will clean up," Shisui came into my room, heading over to me. "You said you needed me for something?"

My eyes flashed, thoughts crossing my mind before I turned to him. "I do. Do you have time to train with Haru and I tonight?"

I could see the surprise on Shisui's face. I could understand why, but pretended I didn't.

Since last year, I've been training with Gai in the morning, getting into shape and practicing my taijutsu. Then I would spend my afternoons with Haru playing shogi or hanging out with Naruto when I could and Sasuke when I wasn't with Naruto. My evenings were spent at home with Hizuki. At night, I trained with Shisui, Itachi, and Sasuke.

However, I've been avoiding Itachi and Shisui of late. Tonight's gathering was an attempt by Kaito to get me to interact with Shisui and the other Uchiha more, having seen my sudden distance from the clan. I saw his concern for me, but ever since our last conversation about the Uchiha clan and Konoha, I have been avoiding him.

Actually, I've been avoiding everyone but Haru and Sasuke lately. My morning training with Gai continued and I threw in time for Sasuke and Naruto, but my time was spent mostly with Haru.

I've especially begun avoiding my parents. It was just…too hard. Just looking at my cousin was harder too.

Shisui blinked. "Sure. Same place?"

I nodded. "I'll meet you there."

As he left, I felt as my happy façade fell.

Fingers clenching tightly, I closed my eyes. I felt the chakra swirled inside of me, the once foreign object now so in tuned to me.

Ever since regaining my memories as Xen, I've been getting help from Haru on how to coexist with the chakra inside me and the chakra around us.

I may have been born with chakra as Uchiha Ryuu, but unlike the others in the Narutoverse, it has been confused with the memories of Xen.

Haru was the only one who could understand it. I couldn't risk letting Shisui and Itachi know about my sudden conscious alertness of chakra. I found that meditation helped with controlling it. Haru's Byakugan was also helpful in mastering chakra control and manipulation.

The one thing he couldn't help me though, was with the kekkei genkai of the Uchiha.

Reopening my eyes, I stared at my Mangekyo Sharingan.

The red eyes stared back at me. Taunting me…a representation of my pain, my loss of innocence, the loss of being just Uchiha Ryuu. It represented the day I became aware of Xen. Of the Narutoverse. The Uchiha massacre, the war, Obito, Madara.

The red eyes staring back at me represented the curse of hatred.

It was ironic really.

I've been living a protected life, especially for an Uchiha and shinobi. Loved and cherished by my family, adored by the clan. It was as if I have only been living on borrowed time, living the life I had always wanted to. But it was not meant to last.

I knew this.

I knew this, yet I continued returning to…to this. To a _home_. As if I belonged here. As Ryuu I did. But not as Xen.

I grabbed for my eyes, continuing to stare at the strange shape.

I must stick to my original plan. I must. I will not hesitate to stop anyone in my way in doing what is best for this world...the world she loved so much. I clenched my fists, leaning my head against the clenched fingers.

She loved this world dearly...even though it was fake. She loved it, believed in what Naruto believed, and constantly told me to watch it with her. She wanted me to find something to enjoy in life. She wanted...me to love this world as much as she did.

Then she was gone.

And by then it was too late, but I desperately clung to Naruto even after she died. I clung to her joy in the world Kishimoto created. I watched the episodes, read the manga, in hopes to see if I could find her within the pages, within the voices of those of the Naruto world.

It was not becoming of a man my age then to be so obsessed with a shounen manga. It was childish. It was fake...but at that time, I could not stand reality.

It was the only thing I had left to try and find her by, to understand why she insisted on me watching it. Why did she love it so much? Why did she love _me_?

I lifted my head to stare back into my eyes, the red continuing to mock me.

I have thought about it. At every angle. Then as Xen and now as Ryuu.

What would I do if I were an Uchiha? What would anyone do with this knowledge, this power? To change the past, change the future...save the ones you love even at the risk of destroying the future?

I smashed the mirror then, staring at it. Broken, useless. But the red continued staring up at me.

Uchiha Ryuu's life was falling to pieces right in front of me.

I was no different from Xen.

I was a monster.

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><p><strong>It's been four months since the Academy Entrance Exam and Itachi joining the ANBU<strong>

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><p><strong>~TBC~<strong>

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><p><em>AN: A week late! I am sorry. But thank you for everyone following and favoriting and reviewing! Please, continue to do so! _

_P.S. I've been messaged about fanart and to answer that: I would love fanart, but only if people have time and energy. Cause, Lord knows, I'm running of out energy now a days due to these college things. lol. But yea._


	12. Uchiha Massacre 3

_**Disclaimer: **I disclaim Naruto_.

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><p><strong><em>"This is what we called fate. It is something we cannot deny..." – Fate, Zhang Yao<em>**

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><p><em><strong>12 - Uchiha Massacre Pt. 3<strong>_

**Konoha**

Hinata kissed Hanabi's hair as she handed the toddler off to a branch member, Hanabi's nurse. The sleeping baby mumbled in her sleep at the transfer, but did not wake. As Hinata bid her farewell, she looked out at where Haru was.

Her brother was sitting at the steps, hands on his knees and head bowed. Frowning, Hinata made her way to him. Around them, branch members were lighting candles.

Haru felt as Hinata came closer to him. Lifting his head, he smiled at her.

"Imouto," he whispered softly.

Hinata hesitated a little when he patted the spot next to him. She looked around before sitting next to Haru. She watched as he removed the slippers he wore inside their home and switched to more sturdy shoes.

"Are you training again today, nii-sama?"

Haru nodded, hands stilling as he finished his task at hand. His fingers stayed down by his feet though. At his sudden change of demeanor, Hinata frowned. She leaned forward, fingers touching his shoulder.

He flinched, Hinata quickly moving her hand away. When she attempted to apologize, he simply laughed it off.

"Don't be sorry. I shouldn't be spacing out."

Hinata, unsure of how to respond, instead asked a question.

"Are you training with Ryuu-san again?"

When Haru nodded again, not saying a word, Hinata looked down at her hands. She was not like her brother. She did not know how to cheer him up. She knew something was bothering him, as he had left early when the two were to spend their time with Hanabi.

He had also been very quiet lately and solemn.

She turned back to him and sure enough, he was looking up at the sky, the sun setting. She knew that Haru and Ryuu trained very late, Haru having argued with their father to be let out late without a guard. He only won the fight when he agreed to train with Hiashi for an extra two hours, meaning that Haru had no more time to spend with Hinata and Hanabi until only after dinner.

She sighed. She could do nothing to help him.

"Whatever it is that you are telling yourself, don't."

Hinata turned to him, eyes wide. She opened her mouth, but he shook his head, smiling gently at her with smile that only Haru could give her. Closing her mouth, Hinata bowed her head, hands clenched together.

Haru reached out and rubbed her head.

"You're not useless or weak. You're Hyuuga Hinata. You are strong and beautiful and will only grow to become a great woman. Don't ever doubt that Hinata-chan," he whispered as he leaned towards her, kissing her hair. Leaning back, he grinned softly. "Unless Hinata-chan thinks nii-sama is a liar."

"No," Hinata quickly whispered, eyes wide. She lifted her head and met his smiling eyes. Only when realizing he was teasing her, did she calm down. She smiled gingerly at him, trying to imitate his grin. "Onii-sama! D-don't tease me like that."

Haru only continued grinning, slowly standing up and helping her up. He looked back up at the sky before turning back to her.

"I'm heading out. Sleep well, Hinata."

"Come back soon, nii-sama," Hinata called out as she watched him leave.

When she turned around, she froze. Watching them at the entrance of one of the hallways leading from the main house, stood their father. Hiashi's eyes were on Haru's disappearing figure. When they turned to her, the stern face did not change.

Bowing, Hinata bid goodnight to her father softly. When she lifted her head, she was surprised that he was still watching her. Nodding at her, he turned away as quickly as he appeared.

Hinata, watching after him, was awed at the fact that he actually greeted her.

…

Haru sensed Shisui just as Shisui sensed him. Walking into the open plain, Haru smiled at the older man. Shisui, nodded at him with a friendly smile.

"Haru-san, how are you?"

Haru shrugged, "doing well."

Shisui nodded slowly, looking away. "That's good—"

"Except," Haru stressed as he came closer to Shisui, "that the Uchiha coup d'état will fail."

Shisui stiffened, body going into lock down as he stared at the Hyuuga heir. What? There was no way that Haru knew—

"The coup d'état will fail," Haru repeated slower, as if talking to someone with bad hearing.

Shisui's fingers flexed as he scanned their surroundings.

"There is no one here, but us three," Haru said with exasperation, "you really think we would discuss this if Ryuu-nii even _thinks_ there is someone that can discover us?"

At the mention of his cousin, Shisui's eyes widened as Ryuu finally appeared, using shunshin to appear next to them. He was so shocked that he couldn't even muster pride in his cousin's successful use of the move that made Shisui famous among shinobis.

"H-how—Ryuu?!"

His cousin looked at him apologetically before sudden activating his Mangekyo Sharingan. Before Shisui could say or do anything, he heard the soft words of Ryuu activating his dojutsu.

"Ame," Ryuu whispered.

Suddenly, everything fell away, darkness enveloping the world and Shisui blacked out.

…

* * *

><p><strong>Takama-ga-hara (The plain of high heaven)<strong>

_It was like gasping for air when he finally felt the world around him awaken. Shisui sat up, fingers clutching at the soft cushion beneath him._

_Soft?_

_Snapping to attention, Shisui attempted to activate his sharingan. However, at the lack if surging of chakra to his eyes, Shisui frowned. He hesitantly touched his eyes._

_"**Chakra doesn't really work here.** **My Byakugan doesn't work either.**"_

_At Haru's voice, Shisui jumped, realizing that he had been on a couch. In the weirdest room too. Catching sight of Haru, Shisui frowned before analyzing his surroundings._

_He was in a room with a large T.V. in front of him and couches around him. To his right was a huge window that showed off massive towers made of glass and metal. Eyes widening, Shisui stared in awe at the foreign towers before snapping back to Haru who was sitting to his left._

_He frowned at Haru, fingers loosening on the cushion. He opened and closed his mouth in shock, staring at the Hyuuga heir in…well, he was shocked._

_"**Wh-what are you wearing and**," Shisui couldn't even finish his sentence._

_Haru sat comfortably, back against the cushion with a book in his hand. Snapping it shut, Haru looked down at himself, smiling._

_"**Oh. These are called jeans and I'm just wearing a V-neck shirt with a vest over it. Not usual shinobi fashion, right?**"_

_Shisui motioned at his head, unable to speak. Haru patted his head, eyes closing as his smile grew._

_"**Ah, yes. The haircut. I can only do this in here. Can you imagine what my father would do to me if I cut my hair this short in reality**?"_

_Shisui shook his head in disbelief before slowly standing up. He looked around again at the small square room._

_"**Is this**," he began, but stopped as he stared out the window._

_He has never seen towers like these before. Not in all his life as a shinobi._ _Haru came to stand next to him._

_"**You've never been in here, right? Ryuu-nii did say that he's been careful about showing Takama-ga-hara to you.**"_

_"**But he showed it to you?**"_

_Haru's smile fell at the hurt in Shisui's voice. He opened his mouth to explain, but someone else beat him to it._

_"**It wasn't time to show you yet.**"_

_Shisui and Haru both turned together towards the voice. Shisui felt so helpless in this world without chakra, unable to sense his surroundings at all. He felt…blind._

_But even so, as soon as his eyes caught the sight of his little cousin, relief spread through him at the familiar sight. Ryuu looked the same. He wasn't wearing the weird clothes that Haru was._

_However, the relief was short lived and replaced with curiosity and questions._

_"**Ryuu**," Shisui whispered, "**you have some explaining to do.**"_

_"**So do you**," Ryuu replied calmly. "**Maybe about the coup d'état?**"_

_Haru shifted anxiously at the sudden tension in the room, the two cousins staring at each other. Shisui was speechless, opening and closing his mouth before sighing. He looked at Haru before turning back to Ryuu._

_"**How did you know?**"_

_Ryuu looked at him closely, before suddenly turning away. A door appeared on the bare wall, surprising Haru and Shisui. Ryuu slowly opened the door, creaking it open before turning to Shisui._

_"**Come with me.**" Then to Haru, "**we will be back. I will…show him the truth. Alone.**"_

_Shisui frowned even as Haru seemed to jump in shock._

_"**You're going to show him?! That wasn't the plan, Xe—Ryuu!**"_

_Shisui, curious at the stutter, watched the two closely._ _Ryuu looked away, his face hidden from the two others._

_"**Haru.**"_

_At that simple command in his voice and the usage of Haru's name, Shisui watched as the Hyuuga heir suddenly backed down. It was as if watching an older brother chide a younger one. Shisui eyed Haru before turning back to Ryuu._

_He had always found the relationship between the two very intriguing as Haru treated Ryuu with respect that was unbecoming of a boy older than his cousin. As if he…revered Ryuu to the status of an older brother and not the other way around._

_Shisui walked towards Ryuu, laying a hand on his shoulder. He didn't know what this was, but he trusted his cousin. Ryuu has never led him astray before and Shisui has always known that Ryuu knew and observed more than he ever let show._

_"**Show me.**"_

_Ryuu, lifting his head, nodded. Without looking back, the two entered the door._

_Shisui frowned even more as he saw the long hall way in front of them. It was a wide hallway, doors at all sides and all the way to the end of the hall where another door similar to the one they entered were._

_All the doors on the side were different shapes and sizes with strange doorknobs or lack of door knobs. They colored differently, some bright and some dark. Some even clear._

_"**Where do these doors lead?**"_

_Ryuu turned to him. "**Ame allows me to enter Takama-ga-hara, essentially the dimension where one's mind exists. These doors…are my memories.**"_

_"**Memories? Mind?**" Shisui mused as he looked at the doors in awe._

_He quickly trailed after Ryuu as the boy walked forward._

_"**Why did you not tell me this**," Shisui muttered as he eyes a door, the handling having been shaking as they passed it._

_"**I didn't want to reveal this to you until the time was right.**"_

_"**You said that before. What does that mean? How does this explain your knowledge of the coup? Oji-san made sure that you wouldn't know.**"_

_Suddenly, they were standing right in front of the door at the end of the hall. Shisui turned shocked eyes back to the long hallway, amazed they had covered such a distance in short time._

_"**This is my mind. Time, space, and even the physical bodies of those who enter it, are controlled by me,**" Ryuu whispered, explaining to Shisui._

_Shisui nodded, looking back at him._

_"**You have not answered my question.**"_

_Ryuu turned to him, their eyes meeting. Shisui's eyes furrowed at the sudden solemnness reflecting from Ryuu's. Quickly, Shisui grabbed Ryuu's shoulders, squeezing them with gentle comfort._

_"**Ryuu, whatever this is, whatever it is you want to show me…I will stand behind you and I will understand. I have never let you down before, have I?**"_

_At the shake of Ryuu's head, Shisui smiled at him reassuringly._

_"**You are my little brother even if our parents are not the same. I have raised you and trained you. I know you.**"_

_At his words, Ryuu looked away._

_"**But you don't.**"_

_Shisui frowned._

_"**Ryuu…**"_

_Without another word, Ryuu opened the door, breaking free from his hold. Shisui quickly acted as Ryuu disappeared into the door, following him._

_"**Ryuu!**"_

_Shisui fell into the room, eyes searching for Ryuu. He ignored the way the door suddenly shut behind him, disappearing._

_He scanned his surrounding, confused by the bare walls and whiteness. The room was empty, everything white. Shisui spun around and sure enough, the wall where the door had been was gone replaced with a wider area._

_"**Ryuu—**"_

_"**Uchiha Shisui.**"_

_Shisui stiffened at the voice, hands grabbing for the hidden kunais on his body and quickly turning to the owner of the voice._

_"**I have been waiting for you.**"_

_Shisui felt like someone punched him. The kunais slipped from his fingers, landing without a sound onto the floor before disappearing, absorbed into the whiteness._

…

**Kinnara **

Yashamaru was not home when Gaara and I got back. He wasn't there either to cook dinner so, when Kankuro and Temari dropped by, the four of us worked together to prepare dinner.

We waited over an hour before deciding that Yashamaru was not coming home.

"He's probably just running some errands for otousan," Temari said reassuringly.

I turned to her, helping her carry some of the blanket and pillow in her arms. We had just finished eating so Kankuro and Gaara were washing dishes. I followed Temari into the guest rooms (which were really just the rooms of Temari and Kankuro because for the past year, they've been coming over and just staying here too).

I made Kankuro's bed as Temari entered her room. Left to myself, I quickly did everything. When I felt someone's presence by the door, I called out behind me.

"Kankuro, come and give me a hand!"

"He's still washing dishes," the soft voice whispered.

Snapping around, I threw the pillow on the bed with a grin. "Yashamaru!"

He did not return my smile though. I stopped in my tracks, pausing. I studied him closely.

"What's wrong?"

He clenched his jaw slightly. It was then that I noticed he was still in his shinobi outfit. Temari suddenly appeared at her door, eyes widened at Yashamaru's figure.

"Yashamaru," she whispered, glancing over at me before looking at him. "You're back late."

"I am sorry," he whispered to her before turning back to me. "Kinnara and I have somewhere to be." He turned back to Temari. "Can you keep an eye on Gaara? I do not want him following us."

Temari blinked. "Uh, sure. I can do that. Kankuro and I are staying the night anyways."

Yashamaru nodded, turning back to me. "Thank you, Temari-sama."

"No problem," Temari trailed off as I followed Yashamaru out. I met Temari's eyes, her concern clear. I smiled reassuringly at her.

As we passed the kitchen, I glanced over at the door. I heard Gaara's soft laughter as Kankuro said something to him. Swallowing down the words in my mouth, I quickly followed Yashamaru out into the night.

…

**Suna**

Yashamaru loved his nieces and nephews. He loved his sister. He loved his village. He loved this little girl before him. He watched her, eyes softening.

Kinnara moved towards the edge of Suna's wall, glancing down at the fall. The sand formed underneath her as she walked off the cliff.

"Kinnara-sama," he whispered, "be careful."

It was more instinct than concern. The two of them knew that the sand would never allow her to get hurt. The desert was cold tonight though, colder than usual. The wind blew gently tonight, oddly enough.

Kinnara grinned back at him. "I'm always careful."

Continuing to study her, he breathed out slowly before saying his next words with care.

"You are. Extremely careful. In fact," he walked to her side, careful of standing only at the edge and not over, "so careful that we never noticed how adapt you are to controlling your chakra. Even manipulating it so that you can do exactly what you are doing."

He waited for her to stiffen, but to his surprise, she simply laughed. It was soft and quiet though.

"The sand will instinctually protect Gaara and me," Kinnara whispered into the night, head turned away from him. "But to control it requires great chakra control and manipulation. Is that not what you are thinking? What you noticed? Or was it Chiyo-baasama and Ebizo-jiisama that noticed."

Yashamaru straightened. His eyes blinked. He said nothing. The two of them knew that she was right. But the greatest disturbance for Yashamaru was that she knew. Like she always did. He studied her closely, like he never had before.

All he has ever seen in her was his sister. No matter how outspoken and loud Kinnara was, she was as kind as Karura. As gentle and as compassionate. He looked away, up at the sky.

It was like having his sister back. Reflecting on it, he realized his mistake all along.

"Your mistake," Kinnara began as she slowly turned to him, freezing him on the spot, "was that you never saw me as just Kinnara. You always saw mama too."

Yashamaru's breath caught in his throat as their eyes met. He blinked back the tears.

"Kinnara."

She smiled at him. That smile…his heart clenched.

"It's okay. I don't mind. I understand," she whispered, almost sadly.

Yashamaru blinked at her in confusion. She understand? He opened and closed his mouth, but unable to say what he wanted. How could she understand? He would never doubt her admiration and love she had for Karura, but the difference…is that Kinnara has never met her. The loss was not the same.

"It's not losing mama that I am referring to," Kinnara whispered as she turned away again.

"Then who," Yashamaru whispered.

Without realizing it, he moved towards her and when his foot lost its setting, he quickly felt as something firmed held him. Looking down, he stared at the sand streaming towards his foot to hold him. He turned back to Kinnara.

"Are you doing this?"

She nodded, slowly lowering herself as she sat at the edge of the sand, knees up against her chest and chin on top. She leaned her head sideways, hair covering her eyes. Yashamaru slowly, carefully, walked towards her, watching as the sand continued to support his step. When he finally made it to her island of sand, he also lowered himself to sit next to her.

"Kinnara," he paused, looking at her before looking down at his hands, "how are you able to do this?"

"Shukaku."

He stiffened. "What?"

Kinnara sighed as she turned to him, head lifting.

"I sleep, I dream, thus I see him."

"Does Gaara-sama," Yashamaru started, but she shook her head.

"He doesn't. I asked him to leave Gaara alone."

Yashamaru's eyes widened. "What? You _asked_ Shukaku of the Sand…to leave Gaara-sama alone?"

When she nodded, Yashamaru breathed out slowly. Okay. So things were a bit more complicated than he thought.

_Great_, he thought. Between the two of them, it would be Kinnara conversing with the sand demon. _Of course. _

…

**Kinnara**

I wanted to laugh at his expression. But then again, I couldn't. Mostly because I couldn't blame him. Actually, I hadn't known that it was Shukaku until a month ago. I thought back to when Shukaku finally 'talked' to me.

_I blinked at my surrounding. It was like no other dream I have had before. I was inside of a tomb, a dome of sand. As much as I loved sand, this was a bit too much. _

_"**Girl**."_

_Stiffening, I quickly turned around and blinked. _

_Holy shit._

_Shukaku was huge. Okay, so huge didn't even cover it. Think King Kong and times fifty. Okay, so over exaggerating, but seriously: HUGE._

_"**Uh, hi…Shukaku**."_

_He blinked at me. Unlike Kurama, he wasn't in a cage. Strange. I cocked my head._

_"**You're not in a cage, like Kurama?**"_

_Shukaku scoffed even as he eyed with suspicion. Oops, I probably shouldn't have asked that. _

_"**I'm not as weak as Kurama to let myself be trapped in a cage. The seal used on you was so weak all it took for me was to wait it out**."_

_"**So what you're telling me is that because Kurama is stronger than you, they used a stronger seal?**"_

_There was a moment of silence. He stared at me and I stared at him. It was a while before he fully digested what I said. Growling, his tail flapped furiously. _

_"**Do you have a death wish, child?**"_

_"**If you wanted me dead, I would be.**"_

_He scoffed again, looking up at the dome walls. "**Even if the seal was weak, I am still stuck inside of here. I can't kill you anymore than I can get out.**"_

_"**So the dome is your cage? Then aren't I supposed to be somewhere, oh, I don't know…not inside? It's kind of crowded in here. You're kind of…big. Fat. Whatever you wish to label yourself.**"_

_Shukaku turned back to me, eyes narrowed. His single tail flickered. _

_"**You don't filter your words, do you girl?**"_

_"**My name's Kinnara and I don't see a reason to.**"_

_Shukaku suddenly grinned. "**But you're not telling the full truth, right? You're more than just that.**"_

_I stiffened, eyes narrowing. I looked down at the sand around me and sure enough, felt my chakra gathered. I build an island in front of me, big enough to lift me up from the ground. Levitating myself, I lifted myself to eye level with him._

_I crossed my arms._

_"**Maybe. What makes you say that?**"_

_Shukaku laughed. "**What makes me think that? Child, I am a part of your mind! Your dreams!**"_

_I froze, fingers clinging into my side. "**You've seen my dreams?**"_

_He cocked his head. "**Yes. And I have questions. The seal has weaken completely now and I am ready to confront you.**"_

_"**What about Gaara?**"_

_Shukaku leaned towards me, barely five feet from me. "**After realizing there were two of you, I delved into both your dreams and to say the least, you were the most interesting. So, should Gaara join us too?**"_

_"**No!**" I quickly uncrossed my arms, fingers clenched at my side. "**Please, I'm asking you to leave Gaara out of this. Please?**"_

_Shukaku cocked an eyebrow at me. His tail continued to swing back and forth, never actually touching the ground._

_"**Please? You're asking me?**"_

_"**Well, yea,**" I whispered, relaxing a little. "**It's not like I can just order you.**"_

_Shukaku grinned. "**No, you can't.**"_

_"**But will you please leave Gaara alone?**"_

_Shukaku straightened, his tail finally hitting the ground with a loud boom. The sand beneath him and where I had once stood erupted in waves. I stared down, glad I chose to be up here instead._

_"**What do I get in return?**"_

_I turned back to him and answered without hesitance. "**A friend.**"_

_Shukaku laughed loudly. "**A friend? With you? My jailer?**"_

_I smiled at him, sad. I was wondering when this day would come and what I would say. Slowly, I breathed out. I wasn't sure if this was going to work, but I slowly began the song. I began with a hum._

_"**You're singing? Now?**" Shukaku laughed even harder. _

_The song was an omake created specifically for entertainment so the very fact that I was using it to try and catch the attention of Shukaku…well, a girl's got to hope._

_He stopped laughing, the dome falling deadly silent as soon as I got to his name. His eyes, I noticed, narrowed at me. I stopped the song though at Kurama. I didn't want to bring in the part about the bijuu being together. At least, not yet. _

_Shukaku stared at me. The silence filled with tension, but I only smiled._

_"**I want to be friends with you.**" I sighed, shrugging. "**Since you've seen my dreams, you know that there is more to me than just being Kinnara of the Sand. I want to trust you with my secret. Can I, Shukaku?**"_

_"**Girl**," Shukaku leaned towards me until his breath was on me. "**Where did that song come from?**"_

_I laughed softly. "**Do you like it? It's not much. I need drums and other instruments. When I do, I'll play the whole thing for you.**"_

_He cocked an eye at me. "**There is more?**"_

_I nodded. "**Of course.**"_

_"**Why**," he lowered his head until our eyes were leveled, "**should I trust you?**"_

_"**Because I am not afraid of you. Because I know, deep down, you wish to be respected and cherished as Hagoromo cherished and care for you and all the other bijuus.**"_

_Shukaku drew back, eyes wide. "**The Sage of Six Paths? How do you know his name?!**" He suddenly growled at me. "**How dare you use his name with no respect?!**"_

_I realized my mistake then. God damn American culture. I quickly raised my hands up in surrender._

_"**I'm sorry! I keep forgetting that it's rude to use people's name outright like that.**"_

_Shukaku growled at me, but I saw that he was interested. _

_"**Forget?**"_

_I quickly nodded. "**Yes. I forgot that about the customs of this land and this culture. I am truly sorry. I did not mean to disrespect the Sage of Six Paths in any way! I have great respect for him. I mean, he created you, didn't he? One of the strongest being in this world.**"_

_"**The strongest,**" he growled, but I lowered my hands._

_I gave him my best attempt at a cocked eyebrow, a 'Are you serious' look. _

_"**Do you really believe that? The Sage of Six Paths…created all nine of you to be together so that you won't ever be alone again or become the Ten Tails. Every bijuu is powerful in their own right and in their own environment.**" _

_Shukaku, taken back by my answer, literally pulled away from me. He suddenly moved in circles around me before settling back where he was to begin with. I stared at him as he stared at me. _

_When I realized he was not going to say anything, I breathed out slowly._

_"**Thank you.**"_

_He blinked at me. "**You're thanking me?**"_

_I nodded. "**You're the one who has been helping me with this,**" I waved my hand around me, "**chakra thing. Right?**"_

_Shukaku huffed. "**Maybe.**"_

_I smiled. "**Well, thank you. Although, you should help Gaara too.**"_

_"**He's never lived in a world without chakra**," Shukaku said softly as he flapped his tail once. _

_I stopped smiling. "**How much do you know?**"_

_Shukaku studied me closely. "**Why don't you explain to me first.**"_

_I sighed. I looked down at my hands. He would be the first ever to know my secret. I smiled softly. It would make sense though. He's a part of me. Slowly lifting my head, I nodded._

_"**Alright. But in return for one thing.**"_

_Shukaku stiffened again. He narrowed his eyes at me. _

_"**What?**"_

_I closed my eyes, grinning. "**You use my name.**" _

_I reopened my eyes to see the mystified suspicion on his face. "**That's all?**"_

_"**Don't make it sound like it's nothing**," I pouted at him. "**A name is very important. Bunpuku was happy as long as you never forgot his name, wasn't he? You still haven't, even to this day.**"_

_Shukaku froze at the name. "**Bunpuku? How—**"_

_He stopped when I only grinned at him. His eyes relaxed, his whole body releasing the tension in the air. He sighed, shaking his head._

_"**You're going to be an annoying one, aren't you, Kinnara?**"_

_I smiled. "**Probably.**"_

_He only sighed more. _

I always dreamed about my past. But for that night, I had to actually explain my dreams to Shukaku. Ever since, we've been conversing every night. I never dreamed anymore.

I closed my eyes, hand covering my face.

I haven't seen his face or heard his voice in…weeks.

"Yashamaru."

He turned to me, not realizing my sudden flashback and still astounded that I had a decent conversation with the sand demon. I looked up and out towards the sand. It was so dark, the only light coming from the sun's reflection off of the moon.

"Have you ever been in love? You're what, 27?"

He must have been taken back by my sudden change of subject because it was a while before he responded.

"No…and yes."

I closed my eyes, head on my knees. I embraced them tightly, as if they could replace the comfort of the one I wanted most. How is it that love can descend lifetimes? Why would it?

It was torture. To love someone you can never have or see again.

I breathed out softly.

"I don't think I will ever fall in love."

Yashamaru made a sound of protest. "What? Kinnara-sama, you are too young to be saying or even thinking about love."

I lifted my head, eyes staring blankly out at the sea of sand before me.

"But," I whispered softly as I leaned back down onto my knees, mouth covered slightly. "I was also this age when I met the love of my life."

"Kinnara-sama, I am sorry but you must not mumble like that."

I turned to him then. Whatever it was he saw on my face, made him freeze. He stared at me.

"Do you believe in reincarnation?"

He blinked. Slowly, he shrugged. "There are many things in this world that we do not know."

I looked away. "And if I tell you that I remember the memories of my past life?"

There was a moment of silence. Slowly, I felt as Yashamaru scooted closer to me.

"Do you?"

I refused to turn to him. I knew that if I told him the truth, he would believe. He would believe because he was Yashamaru. If I told him no…he would also believe it. Because he understood more than anyone what it meant to hide emotions away. To hide the truth.

I lowered my head, resting my eyes on my knees.

"I remember loving him so much that it hurt."

He was taken back by this, a sound of confusion erupting from his lips. There was a moment of silence before I spoke again.

"I'm not just Kinnara."

So I began with my story. Not everything. Not about living in the cosmos or the knowledge of what will happen. No, I just talked about what hurt the most at the moment. Loving him even when he was no longer here.

"I wake up and I think that he'll be next to me."

And I continued about my life as daughter with parents. With a family that did not train everyday in the art of killing.

"I keep thinking that if I get out of bed, I will find my parents down in the kitchen making breakfast. My dad, he made the best scrambled eggs. Even better than you."

I told story upon story. I don't know how much time passed or what he thought, but I couldn't stop talking.

I cried a few tears and laughed a couple of times. I even raged at some points.

"He," I turned sharply to Yashamaru, surprising him with my anger. "He was so, so—so stupid. He was the one who left me behind to travel all over the world. Well, I wanted to go out too. I wanted to explore our world too."

And there was love. There was a lot of love. There was also a lot of pain.

"I never had siblings. So when I met his and they called me their sister, I just," I looked up at the sky. "I loved them so much, Yashamaru."

I felt as he embraced me as I suddenly began to sob. I clung onto him, his arms firmly holding me.

"It was so horrible. He went missing for three days before he finally called me and told me." I dug my head into his shoulder. "How could someone be so cruel? How could a father do that to his own children?"

And finally, there was regret.

"I promised him I would return. If I had just stayed like he wanted me to, he wouldn't have…I wouldn't have…"

I couldn't finish. By then, I was no longer even able to cry. Instead, Yashamaru just rocked me in his arms. I sat in his lap, curled in a ball.

Yashamaru's chin was on my head. I could not imagine what he was even thinking. He waited for me to quiet. Waited for me to stop sniffling. Minutes passed us by and he simply rocked the two of us into a soft rhythm. When he finally spoke, I was calm.

"Kinnara," he whispered softly. "You must not blame yourself. We cannot chose when we lose or leave the ones we love. This is what we call fate." Leaning away so that he could look at me, he smiled sadly. "It is something we cannot deny."

Trembling, I felt as bitter tears formed again. Nodding, I let him go and wiped my eyes. I felt as he kissed my hair.

"Kinnara," he whispered. "You, Gaara, Temari, and Kankuro are the precious people that my nee-san has left behind for me to take care of. I love all of you."

He tightened his arms around me, resting his head on mine.

"The life of a shinobi…we do not know when our last day will come. The only thing we can do," he lifted his head to look down at me, "is to love each other to our best abilities every day. That is what you have taught me. I am sure, that it is also what you taught him."

Wiping my eyes, he smiled at me even as his eyes closed.

"I now understand your objection to the shinobi world." He reopened his eyes and studied me. "But, do you truly not want to be a part of this world?"

I shook my head slowly. "I do. It's just…I do not think I can abandon all that I have known."

He nodded slowly, then turned to me with serious eyes. "I have a solution then."

I blinked at him.

"I will talk to Kazekage-sama first, though."

I frowned a little. "You can't tell me first?"

He suddenly grinned at me.

"Let's call a truce. I'll let you know what Kazekage-sama says and in return," his grin softened into a small smile, "maybe you can finally tell me how you know what you know."

I studied him closely. I have yet to tell him the full truth. I've already gone this far, but at the same time, I can't actually just tell him the full, full truth. So…I knew that I was going to have to water it down. Just like how I did with Shukaku.

Slowly nodding, I slipped off of his lap and stood up.

"Okay. Deal."

Yashamaru stood up too, returning my smile. He shook my hand, his larger fingers wrapping mine up.

"Deal."

**It's still been only four months since the Academy Entrance Exam and Itachi joining the ANBU**

* * *

><p><strong>~TBC~<strong>

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><p><em>AN: YAY! Are you excited? I AM?! lol, jk. Idk. Tell me what you think of this chapter and what you think will happen next. Thank you for the following/favoriting! And the reviews! I pray that this is only worth your time. _

_P.S.S. Well, as you all have noticed (or not due to being on mobile site) I have changed the cover for this fanfic. BIGGG (Huge) Thanks to the beautiful and fascinating and I-am-totally-undeserving artwork from** XSkyeStarlX**. It is very loved and appreciated. _

_*If you wish to see the full drawing, there is a link on my profile page._

**_Shout Out Today to Skyea_**


	13. Uchiha Massacre 4

_**Disclaimer: **I disclaim Naruto_.

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><p><strong>"We fear what we don't know and hate what we do know..." <strong>

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><p><em><strong>13 - Uchiha Massacre Pt. 4<strong>_

**Takama-ga-hara (The plain of high heaven)**

_Shisui was speechless, eyes wide and mouth opened agape._

_It was like looking into the future._

_The man wore similar pants like Haru except his V-neck shirt as Haru called it, was black and without the vest thing over it. Shisui felt himself take a step back, eyes unable to leave the familiar and older face of the man…a face very similar to his cousin._

_"**What is going on here**," Shisui finally breathed out, "**Who are you? What is this?**"_

_"**My name is Xen. You are still in Ryuu's mind, if that's what you're wondering.**" The man whispered as he came forward, hand outreached towards Shisui._

_Shisui only continued staring at him in shock and confusion. The man, face unsmiling and emotionless, quickly dropped his hand._

_"**I apologize. Are you okay?**"_

_Shisui shook his head, trying to recollect himself._

_"**You look like Ryuu.**"_

_"**I know. That's because I am Ryuu.**"_

_"**What?!**" Shisui took a step back, hesitating as he clenched his fingers._

_"**Well, I'm not Ryuu, Ryuu.**"_

_"**Where is he? What have you done with Ryuu?!**"_

_"**Nothing. We both decided this was the best way to protect him. Well, he decided for himself.**"_

_"**What,**" Shisui breathed out harshly._

_He quickly glanced away as he felt the sudden change of environment._ _Suddenly, the two of them were no longer in the white empty room and instead, in a room similar to the one Shisui had first been in._

_Except this room had windows at all side, no bare walls. The strange foreign towers were all around them, gleaming as the sunlight reflected off of their mirror-like walls._

_In the middle of the room was a small table with two chairs and a glass of water near the chair closest to Shisui. The man beckoned towards Shisui, sitting down at the chair opposite of him._

_"**Take a seat.**"_

_"**Not until you tell me where Ryuu is and how you look like him.**"_

_Shisui has henge many times to look like Ryuu and he has seen Haru and Itachi do the same. But he has never seen anyone able to look like an older Ryuu...like this man._

_The man chuckled mirthlessly, eyes empty and unreadable. Shisui shivered at the sound. He had met many men and women before who held similar aura to this man. Dark, mysterious, and…deadly. But never before had he met someone so…cynical. And sad._

_Shisui clenched his hands._

_"**I will ask you once more. Where is Ryuu?**"_

_"**Safe.**"_

_Shisui frowned.  
><em>

_The man, Xen, leaned forward, hand gesturing towards the empty seat._ _Shisui, hesitating only once before straightening and calming himself, sat down. He eyed the glass of water before turning back to the man._

_"**Why is Ryuu not here? Who are you?**"_

_Xen leaned back, eyes watching him closely._

_"**Whenever Ryuu activates the Mangekyo Sharingan, he opens himself up to me—**"_

_"**And who exactly are you?**"_

_"**Do you want an explanation?**"_

_Shisui nodded curtly, shutting his lips. If only chakra worked here and if only this man, after showing his ability to change the environment, didn't have power within Ryuu's Takama-ga-hara._

_Xen waited for him to calm down before continuing._

_"**I am, you can say, Ryuu's subconscious. I am who he once was and now, I am the part of him that he created so that he does not have to face you when the truth comes out. He is afraid. He's trusted me to explain to you his plan, except that it's not exactly his plan.**"_

_Shisui frowned, lips pursing. Xen shrugged at the question in his eyes._

_"**Like I said, I was once who he was. He, Uchiha Ryuu, is my reincarnation.**"_

_At the sudden sharpening of Shisui's eyes, Xen shrugged again._

_"**I don't know the rules nor did I make them. I tell it as it is, Shisui.**"_

_"**That doesn't explain where he is and why you are the one explaining everything and not him.**"_

_"**Well,**" Xen leaned back towards the table, elbow on his knees before continuing, "**what Ryuu has in store for the future is not what he actually thinks it will be. He thinks he knows what I am telling you.**"_

_Shisui stiffened. "**He thinks?**"_

_Suddenly, the water in the glass in front of Shisui changed colors, turning red than green and yellow to finally clear again._

_"**In order for you to understand, you have to know the truth first. It's why he took you here, away from Haru. Haru does not know I exist or what Ryuu is planning. Even Ryuu doesn't know what he himself is truly planning."**_

_**"To simply put, Ryuu has allowed me to place him into a genjutsu within his own mind. After much thought and argument, we've decided it is best if he is left in the dark for a while.**"_

_"**Why though? And how is this even possible? How do I know you aren't just a Kumo nin placed into his mind to lie to him?**"_

_Xen paused, musing, before shaking his head._

_"**The memories you have seen is true. You know it is. I am not a Kumo nin. The place we are in is called Takama-ga-hara. It's a dimension where one's mind takes form. Our memories, our deepest thoughts, our true selves…resign here. This is Ryuu's mind, not a state of mind itself. When Ame is used through Ryuu's left eye, he transport a person physically into the Takama-ga-hara of Ryuu.**"_

_Shisui took this in, hands clenching on his knees. Xen continued._

_"**But Ame, when used with Ryuu's right eye, acts like a genjutsu and Ryuu enters the Takama-ga-hara of others. Through that, it is similar to your own Kotoamatsukami. It is so powerful that he can even trick himself into believing his own illusions.**"_

_"**I thought Ame simply was a transportation dojutsu.**"_

_Xen shook his head. "**It only appears to be a transportation dojutsu. It's what Ryuu wants you and everyone else to believe. In truth, Ame allows its user to travel to places he can remember, like walking through a memory.**"_

_"**But why,**" Shisui finally asked, hands on the table._

_The glass of water shook at Shisui's force against the table.. Xen glanced at it then turned back to Shisui._

_"**To hide the truth. A truth that will change the way you see Ryuu. It will also change the way you look at your world, your clan, and yourself.**"_

_Shisui, taken back by his words, clenched the side of the table. He shook his head, looking down._

_"**I will always love Ryuu. Nothing can change that.**"_

_"**I know.**"_

_Shisui looked back up, jaws clenched before relaxing._

_"**I want to know.**"_

_"**Are you sure?**"_

_Shisui nodded. "**I have sensed that Ryuu has distanced from me. That he has gone somewhere I cannot follow. I do not want him to be alone in whatever this is.**"_

_Xen, blinking at him, beckoned his hand to the glass of water._

_"**Then drink.**"_

_Shisui blinked at him in confusion. His eyes quickly glanced at the water before back to the man across from him. Xen's face showed no emotions, eyes even more unreadable._

_"**What is it?**" Shisui frowned at him._

_"**It will show you the truth.**"_

_Shisui, slowly reached for his fingers wrapped around it, Xen suddenly reached forward, stopping Shisui from lifting the glass. Shisui glanced at him._

_"**There will be no turning back once you drink this.**"_

_Shisui, shaken by this, paused. He stared at Xen. "**Will it explain what is happening to Ryuu?**"_

_"**It will.**"_

_Then, without another word, Shisui lifted the glass and drank. As the water touched his tongue, Shisui felt as the world around him fall. Xen disappeared. Everything disappeared._

_And suddenly Shisui was no longer drinking the glass of water and instead, he was falling._

_But he was not afraid._

_His arms and legs were useless as he stared into the sky. The strange towers surrounded him, the mirrors blinding his eyes with the sun. But as he fell, he heard voices and saw images._

_Of Ryuu._

_Of Xen._

_And faster and faster he fell. The faster he fell, the more memories entered his mind, flashing off of the glass towers around him. The voices grew louder and louder, his eyes closing until he saw only memories._

_Memories of Ryuu. Everything was going backwards, shifting and changing. He saw what happened during and after Kumo, the first interaction between Ryuu and Xen. He saw Haru as Su. He saw…he saw the truth._

_Xen was right._

_Nothing would ever be the same._

_Then suddenly, the memories and the towers disappeared and Shisui felt as his feet touched the ground. It was as if he had never been falling. All around him, holographic images of Ryuu, of Xen, of the people in their lives were running around him. He turned in circles, trying to catch everything. _

_He heard voices, familiar and unfamiliar alike and in all different type of languages. Breathing out heavily, Shisui stopped turning around when he found a physical form._

_He stared at Xen and Xen stared at him. All around them, memories and people who were dead, alive, and never existed walked, laughed, died, and lived around them._

_Shisui numbly covered his eyes as his knees buckled. He stood tall though, refusing to fall. Xen was quiet as Shisui started to cry. _

_Small sobs broke from his chest. He cried at the future that Xen showed him. At the Uchiha massacre…the future of Itachi and Sasuke. At the life Xen, the man who had once been his little cousin, led._

_He wiped the tears, fingers clenching as he breathed out softly. Around them, the memories kept going, a never-ending story. Xen ignored it and soon, Shisui was able to cut out the voices and focus on Xen._

_Breathing softly, Shisui straightened, tears gone even as his chest tightened. _

_"**So…you are Ryuu?**"_

_"**Yes and no.**"_

_Xen looked passed Shisui, at a memory. Shisui fought the urge to turn around and see what he was looking at. He wanted to…but he was also afraid. Everything has changed._

_Jaws clenched, Shisui stayed focus on Xen as the older man continued to explain. _

_"**Before the incident in Kumo, Ryuu had simply been Uchiha Ryuu. After Kumo, he was no longer just Ryuu, but Xen too. The two finally merged. It was then, when he remembered being Xen that I began to exist here inside of his Takama-ga-hara."**_

_"**But why would he create you, even if he needed you?**"_

_Xen's eyes looked away from behind Shisui and up towards the empty black sky. Shisui studied him closely. There was a moment of silence before Xen turned back to him, eyes hard._

_"**Can you imagine what it is like to merge minds with a grown man who holds nothing in his heart, but pain and regret? Not just that, but to suddenly have memories that you do not remember experiencing, memories that you purposely suppressed because it was too painful to recall? To suddenly see the deaths of everyone you loved?**"_

_Shisui shook his head, tears forming at the corner of his eyes again. His fists clenched tightly. _

_Oh, Ryuu…to be cursed by such knowledge. Shisui covered his eyes. _

_Xen lowered his head, studying Shisui through hooded eyes._

_"**He knows what is to come…and he has no hope that the future can be changed. Uchiha Ryuu is only a child. He is very impressionable and emotionally attached to you and everyone in his life as Ryuu. He is blinded by fear, pain, and love.**"_

_He breathed out softly, eyes closing._

**_"But, subconsciously, Ryuu knows better. Subconsciously, Ryuu thinks like Xen because he was once Xen. And Xen, knows better than to let emotions come in the way of what needs to be done. So I was given existence inside of Ryuu's mind. I am, but a physical manifestation of his sub consciousness._**_"_

_"**You're basically Xen then.**"_

_Eyes reopening, Xen nodded. Shisui looked up, hands falling loosely to his side. _

_"**Ryuu**," Shisui said slowly, trying to understand, "**wants the massacre to happen?**"_

_"**He doesn't, but he thinks it must happen.**" _

_Snapping back to Xen, Shisui threw his hands out, taking a step forward unknowingly._

_"**But he has me now. I know. We will stop the Uchiha coup d'état together!**"_

_"**No.**"_

_Shisui was taken back, eyes furious. _

_"**No?! You want the massacre to happen then? I thought you said that you were created to help him? How is letting the massacre happen, helping? Even if that future you have seen changes, it is better than sacrificing Ryuu!**"_

_Xen's eyes hardened, hands stuffing into his pants pocket. _

_"**What about the hatred of the Uchiha?**"_

_Shisui froze, eyes wide. He was breathing heavily, jaws clenching. _

_"**Kotoamatsukami,**" Shisui whispered softly,"**will make them see reason.**"_

_Xen shook his head, making Shisui even angrier. _

_ "**I saw what Danzo will do. I will stop him from stealing my eyes and I will save the Uchiha and the village. Itachi and Sasuke will not suffer the way they did in your world. Ryuu will not have to watch me die!**"_

_"**Do you even understand why Danzo stole your eyes?**"_

_Shisui's fingers clenched. "**Danzo's betrayal to the village and his desecration of my clansmen's bodies has proven that Danzo desires nothing but power. My father—**" _

_Tears appeared at his eyes, Shisui's eyes squeezing shut in grief. He reopened them, the tears falling freely even as his teeth clenched._

_"**My father taught me to respect Danzo, but today, I have seen that Danzo does not deserve my respect nor my understanding. I am only sorry that when I finally reunite my father, I will have to reveal to him what his nakama has become.**"_

_Xen closed his eyes, breathing out slowly. "**Danzo, may have had an ulterior motive, but in the end, what he did was right.**"_

_"**No! He destroyed my clan to steal our kekkei genkai! I believed him to be an honorable man, a loyal Konoha shinobi! He assisted Orochimaru's invasion and killed the Sandaime—**"_

_"**He destroyed your eyes so that Obito would not use them. He did all he did in the belief that it would benefit Konoha. He was a bitter, jealous man, but in the end, he truly thought of Konoha. Do you even understand what it would mean for Obito to have access to Kotoamatsukami?**" _

_Shisui, at his words, fell silent, fists clenched. He looked down, eyes squeezed. Suddenly, their surrounding changed. The memories disappeared, one by one. _

_The voices and the sounds all faded away and soon silence enveloped them along with darkness. A beam of light shined down on them, but Shisui ignored everything and turned back to Xen with determination in his eyes._

_"**Shinobis**," Shisui whispered, "**should never wish for power if it meant betraying their nakama. We are servants to our villages. We serve from the shadows. Danzo desired only power to rule Konoha. He did not desire peace.**"_

_"**Then what is the difference between Danzo and the Uchiha?**"_

_Shisui, blinked. He opened his mouth, but Xen spoke first._

_"**The Uchiha is willing to destroy the village to regain their pride. Do you truly think an illusion can mask the hatred and pain of a clan?**"_

_Shisui fell onto his knees, fingers clutching them as he bowed his head, tears falling. Xen walked towards him slowly, continuing softly._

**_"You see it, don't you?_**_"_

_Shisui shook head furiously, hands tightening. "**No—**__"_

_"**Fugaku chose to die to save the Uchiha name. He sacrificed both of his sons' future to save a clan.**"_

_Shisui shook his head in objection once more. "**Fugaku-san is not like that. He had no choice! He—**"_

_Xen shook his head, eyes suddenly hollowed as he stood in front of Shisui. Xen looked down at him with lifeless eyes._

_"**You allowed yourself to die just as Fugaku and Mikoto did. You allowed a child to burden the mistakes a clan...mistakes of adults.**"_

_"**I didn't want to die! There was no other way to prevent—**"_

_"**Your death simply stalled the coup. In the end, you still allowed Itachi to continue on alone.**"_

_Shisui made a protest, his chest clenching, but Xen simply stared down at him without any sympathy._

_"**You are no different from Fugaku. Fugaku fought to regain the honor of the Uchiha, even at the possible destruction of a whole village, yet he couldn't fight to save his own sons. Tell me, Shisui, in what world is it right for a father to let his son kill him? To let a son suffer for the mistakes of his father?**"_

_Shisui breathed out softly, taking this in. He shook his head, eyes squeezed shut._

_"**Fugaku is not your father.** **The Uchiha is not your clan! You cannot misplace your hatred unto the Uchiha!**"_

_Xen's eyes flashed. Shisui looked up, meeting his eyes. Brown and onyx clashed. Shisui watched as Xen looked at him with indifference,_

_"**You think that I want the Uchiha clan to die because they remind me of the Xiong clan? That I am saying these things only because of my hatred towards the man I once called father?**"_

_Suddenly, Shisui was thrown backwards. Without chakra, without any control in this world, Shisui landed on his side and rolled until he stopped. _

_He winced, pain erupting all over his body. He gasped for air, but was suddenly being held down by Xen's fingers around his throat. _

_The hold was not chocking, only firm. Shisui's eyes snapped open as he stared up into the emotionless dead eyes of Xen._

_"**It's easy, isn't it? To be the one who dies first. You don't have to face the consequences of your death.**"_

_Shisui opened his mouth to protest, but no sound came out. __He shook his head in denial. _

_Xen's fingers softened, his face suddenly hidden as he bowed his head. His lips near Shisui's ears as he leaned down._

_"**Do not compare me to you, Uchiha Shisui. You, who has never been taught to cherish life, was raised to be a murderer.**"_

_Xen suddenly let him go, Shisui holding himself up with his hands, staring up at the older man dazedly. Xen looked down at him, face still hidden by the sudden darkness around them. _

_"**Tell me, how long have you known of the coup?**" _

_Shisui's breathing hitched, chest constricted. "**I—**"_

_"**Tell me, Uchiha Shisui, why you didn't use Kotoamatsukami sooner? Why wait until Itachi had no other choice? Why wait, until you had no choice?**"_

_"**I do not want to use Kotoamatsukami on my own clansmen! I—**"_

_Shisui shook his head, trying to stand, but he felt as everything suddenly weighed down on him, pushing him down. _

_Xen suddenly felt larger, bigger than life itself. Finger clenched, Shisui closed his eyes. He opened his mouth, but Xen cut him off coldly._

_"**You are but a soldier that cannot challenge the authority of its master. Naïve and blind.**"_

_Xen suddenly chuckled mirthlessly, the sound chilling Shisui._

_"**You naively walk into Danzo's trap and lost your eye and with it, Kotoamatsukami. You blindly hoped that the Uchiha would see reason, but waited until it was already too late.**"_

_Shisui felt as the weight suddenly lifted. Breathing out heavily, Shisui stared up at Xen. Xen continued to look down at him with apathetic eyes._

_"**To serve in the shadows means to never be seen. It allows for people like Danzo to lead. In the perfect world, honor and integrity exists, but in a world like this, only the ones willing to devour others can define what honor and integrity is.**"_

_Xen shook his head, pity reaching his cold eyes.._

**_"The dead can only preach. Tell me, Uchiha Shisui, what are you willing to do to save the ones you love? Will you leave them to burden the hatred of this world alone…or will you bear the load with them?_**_"_

_Shisui breathed heavily staring at him with wide eyes. Xen reached a hand out then, face hidden._

_"**You have seen what Ryuu's plans are and know that Ryuu himself must be oblivious for now. I cannot do this without you. We cannot.**"_

_Shisui stared at his hand. Fingers unclenching, he slowly reached for it. When their fingers touched, Shisui felt as everything around him brightened. _

_The light grew and grew until Xen's body began to be consumed by it. Shisui's eyes widened, but Xen simply shook his head._

_"**Our time is up. You will return to Ryuu now.**"_

_Shisui nodded numbly, eyes closing before reopening. He breathed out softly. He needed to say it. It's been on his mind since seeing the memories, since hearing all that Xen wanted to say. _

_He breathed out slowly as their hands fell apart. Reopening his eyes, Shisui straightened._

_"**Xen.**"_

_Xen focused on him, not saying anything. Shisui watched him closely. The light was almost to Xen's chest, creeping slowly up._

_"**Have you thought about the possibility that Ryuu and Haru are not the only ones who have been reincarnated from your world?**"_

_At his words, Xen stiffened. _

_"**It is a possibility.**"_

_Shisui shook his head, breathing out softly. __"**I meant...have you thought about it.**"_

_Xen paused at his question. The two watched each other carefully, before Xen shrugged. He turned away, apathetic. _

_"**Time is up.**"_

_Shisui blinked. "**Xen—!**"_

_"**Take care, Shisui.**" Xen's emotionless voice cut him off. "**If everything happens accordingly, our next meeting won't be far away.**"_

_Then with a snap, Shisui was enveloped in a white world. Slowly, he closed his eyes, the light blinding him. However, __Shisui opened his eyes as he felt his new surroundings. He turned to Ryuu, his cousin looking at him sadly._

_He was back in the blank white room, empty and void._

_Shisui turned to Ryuu, the younger boy unable to look at him. Reaching out, Shisi hugged him. Ryuu stiffened. When the older man stood back, the younger boy looked at him with solemn eyes. _

_Xen already showed Shisui what he needed to say and do with Ryuu. __As bad as he felt for lying to his little cousin, after Xen revealed what the plan was, Shisui could live with the guilt._

_"**Ryuu, it will be okay.**"_

_Ryuu, hesitation in his eyes, looked at Shisui._

_"**I know,**" the young Uchiha whispered._

_"**This is the way it must be.**" Shisui spoke softly, reassuring Ryuu. "**It will okay, Ryuu. I understand. I do not blame you. To be a shinobi...is to protect from the shadows. We do what we must.**"_

_The boy nodded stiffly, looking down at his hands. Shisui's heart clenched, his eyes watching his young cousin. He hated this…but in the end, Xen was right._

_Nothing can be the same._

_Even if it meant accepting death, Shisui would gladly keep Ryuu safe._

...

* * *

><p><strong>Konoha…<strong>**later that night.**

Haru looked up at the sky, eyes sad.

"I am sorry, Ryuu-nii."

He turned back to Xen, the younger boy continuing to skip the stone across the small stream. Each ripple caused the reflection of the moon to waver. Haru slowly picked up a stone, smoothing his fingers on it.

As soon as Ryuu and Shisui returned, Haru knew that he had loss. Shisui had agreed with Ryuu. The massacre had to happen.

As soon was Ryuu had returned everyone back to the physical world, Shisui had left. He had simply hugged Ryuu and nodded his head at Haru before leaving.

Eyes casted low, Haru walked over to Ryuu. The younger boy continued to throw stones into the water, no longer caring if they skipped.

"Ryuu-nii," Haru whispered softly.

Ryuu's face was hidden from his view, the younger boy ignoring him. He bent down to pick up a stone, but Haru saw as he suddenly stopped half way down.

There was a moment of tense silence. Suddenly, Ryuu picked up the stone and chucked it at the water with a sudden force, the water dipping.

"Don't call me that."

Haru stiffened at the soft words. He turned sharply to Ryuu.

"Ryuu-nii?"

"I," Ryuu clenched his fists, "I'm Xen."

Haru opened his mouth, but stopped. Pursing his lips, Haru remained silent. Ryuu's fingers unclenched.

"I'm Xen," he repeated, as if trying to reassure himself. "Just…Xen."

"But you're also Ryuu."

"I'm not."

Haru breathed out slowly. "You can't be just Xen anymore though. This world—"

"Is no different from the other."

Haru stiffened once more, staring at Ryuu's back. Ryuu lowered his head, staring into the stream.

"Then am I not Haru," Haru asked as looked away, staring down the rock in his palm. "Am I just Su then?"

Ryuu lifted his head, eyes staring ahead blankly. "You're Haru and you're Su."

Fingers clenching over the stone, Haru looked back up, eyes furrowed together.

"Then aren't you Xen and Ryuu also?"

Ryuu turned slightly, looking at Haru at the corner of his eyes.

"No…because Ryuu would have never let this happen."

"And you still can stop it from happening," Haru argued, eyes determined. "With Shisui knowing, we can stop this! We can convince Shisui that the massacre is not necessary!"

"There is no 'we', Su. You don't have to be a part of it, if you don't want to be."

"Haru," Haru whispered softly, sad. "I'm Haru, Ryuu-nii."

Ryuu stared at him, eyes unreadable. Haru sighed softly and threw the rock aside. He went over and forced Ryuu to face him. He looked down at Ryuu.

"I've been thinking," Haru whispered softly, eyes gentle, "We can no longer look at this world the way you have been."

He breathed out heavily. Ryuu looked down, eyes hidden.

"We belong in this world. We cannot turn back the clock, Ryuu-nii. I will always be Su, your little brother, but you must accept that we are more than just that now. That world where I was Su and you were Xen…it's a world only we know. We have to let it go."

Ryuu, shook his head. Haru, eyes closing, reached out to him. But when he felt his hands get slapped away, the Hyuuga's eyes snapped open in shock. Ryuu's whole body was shaking, hands trembling and fists clenched.

"Ryuu-nii," Haru began.

"You died too young. You can't possibly understand what it feels like to remember fifteen years of memories from another lifetime," Ryuu shook his head angrily, hands covering his eyes. "I cannot forget. I won't."

Haru's hands flexed awkwardly at his side, continuing to study Ryuu closely. He was hurt at Ryuu's words. It's true that he died as Su very early, but it doesn't take away his memories nor his love for Ryuu, for Xen.

"Ryuu…"

Shaking his head once more, Ryuu's hands fell to his side. He continued to look down as he said his next words softly.

"Just forget it."

Haru, recognizing the tone. Some things just never change. He clenched his fists, mouth pursed together.

"Not everyone has to die."

Ryuu looked up, eyes hard. "I don't see how—"

"Save Minori."

Ryuu blinked. Haru shifted uncomfortably as he sighed.

"Look, I saw how Sasuke was without anyone. You will not be enough. He will need a female presence. You're...no offense, even more angsty than Sasuke."

Haru waited as Ryuu thought it over. He looked down at his hands, Haru continuing to just watch him. When Ryuu finally looked back up, eyes unreadable, Haru thought the worst. He closed his eyes, sighing.

"Okay."

Wait, what? Haru blinked. He blinked once more. He stared at Ryuu even as Ryuu stared at the ground.

"What?"

"I said okay," Ryuu whispered as he straightened, looking away. "I'll save Minori."

Haru opened and closed his mouth. He swore it would be harder. Slowly, he swallowed the lump in his throat and whispered, "And your parents?"

Ryuu's fist clenched, his teeth gnashing together. Haru, seeing his reaction, felt his heart tightened. He guessed that was a no. Ryuu shook his head, breathing out through his teeth as he rubbed his eyes.

"I can't," he whispered brokenly, painfully.

Haru's heart broke at Ryuu's voice. "Okay."

Ryuu's hands fell away, his eyes finally turning to meet Haru's. Haru nodded slowly as he breathed out.

"Okay," Haru repeated softly, reaching out and clasping Ryuu's shoulder. "I.."

He wanted to say he was sorry, but those words were empty. There was nothing more Haru could say to change the minds of Ryuu and Shisui.

Har looked away. He had hoped that Shisi would have changed things.

Turning back to Ryuu, Haru silently comforted him ad the younger boy picked up another stone and began skipping it.

...

**Kinnara**

I crawled into bed that night, a little lighter than I have been in a long time. I turned my head to Gaara as he stirred, turning to me.

I frowned at him in the darkness and turned on my side to face him.

"Gaa," I whispered as I reached out and pulled the covers over him. "Why are you not asleep yet?"

"You didn't tell me that Yashamaru was taking you out."

I sighed and leaned closer. "I'm sorry."

Gaara shifted in the darkness, hands reaching for mine. I took his fingers and held them tightly. At the age of seven, I see that maybe I have mothered and spoiled Gaara a bit. But it was okay. He needed it.

"What did Yashamaru want?"

"The truth."

There was a moment of silence until Gaara shifted closer to me. "About Xen?"

I paused. I have only told Gaara about my dreams of Xen. He was too young to understand what reincarnation was. Or about the future of our lives. Or what could have happened and who he could have become. Slowly, I broke my fingers away and moved them towards his face.

Smoothing his hair, I sighed softly.

"Yea." My fingers went back to my side. "I told him about Xen."

"And Shukaku?"

"And Shukaku," I confirmed.

Gaara, in the dark, turned to his side to face me. "Why doesn't Shukaku talk to me?"

I smiled a little, imaging that interaction. "Maybe one day. For now, let me talk to Shukaku. He's…mean."

Gaara went silent. As the minutes passed, I grew concern. I was about to sit up and ask him what was wrong when he finally spoke again.

"Ki is always protecting me," he mumbled, sad.

"But Gaa is always protecting me too," I whispered back as I reached for his hand once more. "We protect each other. Right?"

There was a moment of longer silence. Gaara, after a while, turned back onto his back.

"Okay."

But his voice was too soft. I knew that he wanted to say more, but I also knew that whenever Gaara didn't tell me something, it was mostly because he wanted to think about it first. Rarely, has he never told me anything.

My fingers tightened on his. I curled next to him, hugging him.

"Okay," I whispered softly back.

It was only when he thought I was asleep, that he finally turned back to me and whispered what he really wanted to say.

"I'm sorry, Ki," his fingers tightened on mine, "I will get stronger. I will protect you from now on."

**[This Chapter is a continuation of last chapter]**

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><p><strong>~TBC~<strong>

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><p><em>AN: long time no update. I am sorry. Chemistry is sucking the life out of me. _

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><p><strong>Explanation of Ryuu and Xen Split<strong>

_First_ – Reincarnation is the rebirth of a **soul**. But sometimes, souls carry memories that cannot be forgotten.

_Second_ – Memories and experience **shape** the **soul **in its new life, **But they do not change the soul itself.** It's the essential question of: Who am I and am I still me when I die?

**_So to explain…_**

Remember that Ryuu is a seven year old boy (loved, adored, and cherished by everyone in his life) while Xen is a broken-dead 31 year man (who had a hard childhood, but you'll see in next chapter). Imagine having to combine those two minds!

What's happening to Ryuu is an extreme version of what can happen to children facing traumatic experiences. They shut themselves within, suppressing memories of whatever happened to them. Adults do it to. However, this is the Narutoverse and Ryuu is a Sharingan holder.

So to cope with his new memories and knowledge of the world, Ryuu creates a manifestation of his sub consciousness, which in turn is actually just Xen. Ryuu knew that he was too young and emotionally attached to think straight and that he would succumb to Xen's darker memories and values.

So by splitting himself, he made it possible to separate his more sensitive side and his logical side (Ryuu vs. Xen). Due to the darkness that Xen lived, Ryuu is greatly affected by it because he has never experienced such darkness before. Look at Sasuke and how…traumatized he became. Ryuu, in order to avoid total insanity and madness, split himself so that Xen (the more logical side and his sub conscious) can think and plan everything while he as Ryuu try to cope with just being, well, Ryuu.

The ending scene between Haru and Ryuu reiterates the fact that Ryuu is still just struggling with the split memories of Xen and his memories of being Ryuu. Ryuu is just Ryuu though, so don't get confused by Ryuu (he's not thinking straight right now). Think about Kinnara. She's both her previous self and new self. Since she was reborn with her memories, she's been able to separate the two And learned to live with both memories. But Ryuu who didn't grow up with the knowledge of his previous life is following a darker and harder path. Then some may question why Haru isn't having difficult, but that's because Su died at a younger age and with a far happier life than both Kinnara and Xen. Getting his memorose back wasn't a sad or difficult thing for him, just sad that he missed so much and left behind people he loved. Plus he was a bit older than Ryuu when the memories came back of his old life and he has shown a far more optimistic and mature side due to being the Hyuuga heir and carrying the responsibilities of being the older brother of Hinata and Hanabi.

**If it's too confusing, you can ask me questions. I will answer them. But I hope it makes sense.**

...

_Thanks for reading though and tell me what you think. Hope everyone is good. _

_My Inuyasha Fanfic fans must hate me. I give more attention to you, my Naruto fan people. Hehe, I'm sorry? _

_Until Next Time_


	14. Uchiha Massacre 5

_**Disclaimer: **I disclaim Naruto, but I am close to waging a war for ownership_. HOW DARE KISHIMOTO BE DONE WITH IT! But...Naruto is officially...over. (T_T)

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><p><strong>"You came into my life as a story and left as a legend..." - Naruto Fan as Naruto ended <strong>

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><p><em><strong>14 - Uchiha Massacre Pt. 5<strong>_

**Three Days later**

**Kinnara**

"—361 tenketsu in the body," I muttered under my breath.

Chiyo, turning her head slightly back, narrowed her eyes at me. "Am I boring you, Kinnara-sama?"

I quickly shook my head, Ebizo chuckling softly next to me.

"No!"

Chiyo huffed and continued on with her lecture about the chakra pathways and tenketsu. I inwardly sighed, hefting my pack on my back as the three of us, Chiyo leading the way, continued up the mountain.

I frowned, looking around me.

We've traveled for days across the sand dunes and have just made it to the edge of the Land of Wind. We're probably at the border between Wind and the Land of Rivers because as we got closer to our destination, the more vegetation I saw.

This would be the first time I've been out of Sunagakure…and the first time I've been away from Gaara. I sighed once more.

"You must miss Gaara-sama," Ebizo whispered to me.

I blinked in surprise. I glanced quickly at Chiyo and whispered back without looking at him, "We've never been apart for long before."

Ebizo nodded, his lips smiling gently. "We will be back soon. Yashamaru will take good care of him."

I nodded, head hanging. I still missed him like crazy. How was I going to sleep at night without my panda bear/raccoon boy?

**_You'll be fine, stop being such a brat._**

I rolled my eyes. Kami-sama/Jashin-sama, lord. Anyone.

Why?

**_Shukaku, shut up._**

I heard his cackle, but he wisely stopped. It's been happening for a week now that Shukaku was slipping into my mind. I was already dream deprived, but he was not mind depriving me.

"Stupid tanuki," I muttered, trudging ahead.

"What was that," Chiyo whispered, head snapping to me again.

"Nothing!"

Ebizo chuckled once more.

I sighed once more. Something I've been doing a lot since Chiyo, Ebizo, and Shukaku has entered my life (well, Shukaku has always been here, but not…here, here).

"You will like where we are going, Kinnara-sama," Ebizo whispered, cheerful.

I eyed him a little. I never realized how optimistic and friendly Ebizo was. The manga did no justice on his split personality from Chiyo. Damn, they were just like me and Gaara.

A shiver ran down my back, forcing me to cringe. I shook my head and focused. I was not becoming a Chiyo and Gaara is never becoming the quiet, apathetic, and strangely optimistic Ebizo.

I blanched a little and instead focused on my surrounding. I turned to Ebizo with my question.

"Where exactly are we doing here? So far away?"

When Ebizo simply smiled at me, I scowled. I saw that Chiyo had stopped head of us, having reached the top first. Quickening my pace, I followed her and stopped at the top.

Damn. No. Please, don't let this be what I think it is.

Chiyo cackled at my expression, walking down the path. "Hope you like to fish!"

I moaned, covering my eyes. Fishing. Damn it. I should have known.

When Yashamaru implied I would be a better medical nin than kunoichi, Chiyo took the idea and ran with it. Literally. She dragged me here, after all.

Ebizo patted my back, seeing my distress. "Practicing the shosen jutsu on fish is the best way to start your training, Kinnara-sama. Tomorrow, we will begin tree walking."

I stared after Chiyo, her happiness at being back to and Ebizo's fishing pond showing greatly. As I continued to watch her, I felt as my body relaxed.

She seemed to look younger, almost like she's dancing as she set her pack down and started taking things out. She was like a kid on a camping trip, so unlike the senile old woman in Suna.

I blinked, before whispering, "She really enjoys it here, doesn't she?"

Ebizo, at my comment, looked towards her too. I turned to him as he nodded, heavy lidded eyes and his face softening.

"This place holds good memories for nee-chan. As much as we love Sunagakure, it is good to be away from the village."

In other words, I turned back to Chiyo, away from the place that hold memories of people no longer there. I took his words in, eyes wandering to the forest.

The green vegetation was so different, a bright contrast from the brown golden sand. It made me think of Konoha, another place filled with memories, both good and bad. I felt something inside of me twisted in pain, my breath stuttering.

Gaara and I were seven now. It's felt like it's been forever since I've been reborn. But I knew that this was only the beginning.

The Uchiha Massacre was either happening right now or has already happened or will happen soon. Guilt washed over me. If I was stronger, if I could trust the Kazekage and Yashamaru, if I was not Kinnara, I would stop the massacre. I would save Itachi and Sasuke from this horrible fate.

I wonder what it will be like when I finally arrive in Konoha. Finally meet Naruto, Sasuke, and everyone else. I breathed out softly before turning back to Ebizo. He was making his way to Chiyo. I quickly followed him, the two of us making our way to her.

The old woman danced on her toes, unpacking her fishing pole. As we neared her, she turned to us, eyes closed as she held the fishing pole to our faced with a large silly grin.

"We're having fish tonight!"

I looked up and sure enough, it was getting late.

Where had the day gone?

* * *

><p><strong>Konoha<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Ryuu<strong>

I shook, physically unable to stop as I covered my eyes. It was too much. I felt as Shisui knelt before me, his hands on my shoulder.

"Ryuu," he whispered solemnly.

I felt as Haru came to my side also. I felt as his hand rested on my back, trying to comfort me. But there would be no comfort. Not today. Not tonight.

Shisui's fingers clenched tightly on my shoulders. He whispered my name once more, harsher than usual. But I refused to look at him. He was my cousin, my brother. This would be the last time I see him. Suddenly, Shisui was hugging me. He trembled.

"We agreed to this."

I nodded, even as my body shook.

"This," he whispered against my hair, "is for the best."

I nodded once more, but even as he said the words, I felt as I began to cry.

I wanted to scream. I wanted to die.

It was happening all over again. I was going to lose my family. I was going to lose everyone. I would lose my parents once more. Shisui was just the start.

He stepped away from me then, his warmth leaving me. I lifted my head, finally looking at him. I took him in, his familiar figure, his hair, his clothes, and his face. Breathing out harshly, I nodded.

I wiped the tears away and I slowly stood up.

Haru stood up with me, his hand still on my back. I turned to him and saw the tears also. I was losing a brother and Haru was losing a friend. Breathing out softly, I reached out and clasped Haru's shoulder.

I had to be strong. For Haru…for Sasuke and Itachi. I turned to Shisui. He returned my gaze and slowly, he nodded.

"You know what to do?" The words were soft against his lips.

I nodded, eyes hard. "The letter is in your room?"

He nodded curtly. He turned to Haru, eyes softening. He reached out and rubbed Haru's hair, smiling wanly.

"Take care, Haru…and keep an eye on Ryuu, okay?"

Haru nodded stiffly, tears falling even as he pursed his lips. Shisui turned back to me, eyes gentle.

"Ryuu," he whispered, "I am happy to have been born as your cousin and to have raised you. I couldn't have asked for a better brother."

At his words, I finally hugged him. Memories of growing up with Shisui, of waking every morning to his smiles, and our time together passed through my mind. I squeezed my eyes shut, holding him tight.

I've lost so many. The pain will never go away.

This time it was different though. Shisui knew he was dying and _I_ knew he was dying. As soon as he walked out that door, he would go "meet up" with Danzo and afterwards…Itachi.

The Uchiha clan meeting to start the coup was tonight. There would no time to mourn. It was time.

The Uchiha Massacre…was finally happening.

…

Danzo frowned as he stopped the ROOT members from chasing after Shisui. His eye narrowed after Shisui's disappearing form.

Izanagi should have worked. How did Shisui know about it?

"Danzo-sama," the ROOT behind him whispered, "should we not follow?"

"Follow him, but do not attack," Danzo muttered as he clenched his fists. "He will reach Itachi before you reach him. Attacking the two of them," he turned away, "will bring too much attention to ROOT. Retrieve him once he is alone, but not before then."

The members all nodded and quickly disappeared.

Danzo frowned. He cannot let Shisui use Kotoamatsukami. It was a plan doomed for failure. But still, Danzo clenched his teeth.

How did Shisui know about Izanagi?

…

**Naka River**

"It no longer looks like the Uchiha coup d'état can be prevented," Shisui whispered, back turned to Itachi. "And if civil war erupts in the Leaf, other nations are certain to invade. Real war will break out. When I tried to stop the coup d'état with the Kotoamatsukami, Danzo attempted to steal my eyes. He doesn't trust me."

Shisui turned to Itachi, face grim and battered.

"He intends to protect the village his way, no matter what it takes or how it looks. I suspect he'll come after my eyes again as well," Shisui paused as he looked away. "These eyes…this power. I will destroy it along with myself."

_Shisui_, Itachi whispered within his mind.

Shisui, as if he heard Itachi, turned to him, calmly taking out both of his eyes and right in front of Itachi, crushed them. Itachi's eyes briefly close at the sight, his heart clenching.

With a smile on his face, Shisui seemed almost…happy.

"You're the only person I can count on, my best friend. Please, protect this village and the honor of the Uchiha name. Watch over Ryuu for me. He has changed since Kumo and with my death he will only continue to change."

The wind gently blew, Itachi's eyes blinking as he tried to control his emotions.

_Shisui_.

"What will you do now," Itachi asked calmly.

"If I die, several circumstances will change. I've already left a note behind." It was then that Itachi noticed how Shisui was edging away, towards the cliff.

He lost his calm.

"Wait, Shisui!" He reached for him, but Shisui simply said, "Don't stop me Itachi."

With those words, Shisui smiled. Time seemed to hold still, Itachi's body suddenly cold and his heart stuttered.

Shisui, slowly fell backwards and Itachi reached for him. But it was too late. As Shisui fell, as Itachi rushed forward to stop him, the older boy said his last words to Itachi.

"If you are my friend…please. Protect Ryuu."

Itachi's fingers barely even grasped Shisui's hands before he fell over, Itachi clinging onto the side of the cliff. Eyes squeezed shut, Itachi cried.

Fingers clenching, he felt as the chakra around his body suddenly inflamed. It surged towards his eyes and something wet, too thick to be tears, fell from his eyes.

_Shisui_.

Itachi reopened his eyes, the Mangekyo Sharingan bleeding.

…

The ROOT members stared in confusion at the scene. It didn't make sense. It made absolutely...no sense.

"Hey."

Stiffening, the three members turned as one and stared at the red eyes of the familiar boy. But before the three, shocked that they had not sensed him at all, could say or do anything, he whispered one word, red eyes spinning.

"Ame."

...

**Later that night**

Minori stiffened, eyes snapping open. Her front door closed softly, as if the intruder was uncaring if he or she was heard, but not in a haste to reveal themselves either. She slowly sat up on her bed.

She had just returned from the clan meeting, having left early because Itachi was going to be there tonight (the two were very adamant in their secrecy). Plus, it was always after clan meetings that Itachi would spend the night with her.

She was expecting someone…but not this early. She knew the clan meeting was still going on. It couldn't be Itachi.

Lips pursing, she got up and made her way out from her small bedroom.

Her apartment, only a small walking distance from the Uchiha compound, was a tiny. It held only a long hallway that led directly into her kitchen that made up most of the home with no living room space and her door facing directly towards the hallway. There was no way to avoid direct confrontation with her possible intruder.

When the door opened, Minori paused. Staring into the darkness, she caught sight of a familiar shadow. Blinking against the darkness, Minori breathed out softly, relieved. She relaxed, even if confused.

"Itachi?"

The body, leaning heavily against her wall, froze, hands falling away from the face. Minori frowned. She reached to turn on the lights, but before she could even touch the switch, Itachi was suddenly in front of her.

She stiffened, mouth opening, but then she was suddenly pushed back, Itachi's firm body hitting hers. In a blink, Itachi backed her into the wall, his fingers painfully biting into her wrists as he held them above her head.

Minori froze, body tense, as she felt Itachi's warm breath against her neck, the sudden wetness sending goose bumps against her skin.

Dread filled her. She has never seen or even _heard_ Itachi cry before.

When his fingers only tightened on her wrists, Minori breathed out softly. She forced herself to relax even as instincts told her to fight, to free herself. She whispered softly to him, as if soothing a child.

After a while, Itachi's body stopped trembling. Instead, he just held still, his body holding hers against the wall. She could feel the pounding of his heartbeat against hers, his fingers relaxing at her wrists. She tugged at her imprisoned hands and after a while he finally loosened his fingers enough for her to be freed.

Without any hesitance, Minori quickly embraced him, one hand smoothing his hair. She tried to calm him with her words and soft touches, but she could still feel the tears and the tension in his body. Even after letting her wrists go, Itachi's hands remained away from her figure and instead, his arms rested against the wall, caging her.

She waited until the tension slipped away from his figure and the tears stopped, leaving behind only wetness. She felt his body shutter one last time before turning limp against her, pushing up against hers.

"Itachi," she whispered his name softly, soothingly.

He moved then, head lifting. It was too dark to clearly see each other, but Minori ignored the darkness and instead leaned her forward until their foreheads touched. She breathed him in, trying to calm him. She breathed his name once more against his lips.

Minori was unsure of what to do. Itachi always seemed to strong and even though she knew he carried many burdens, he has always spoken little of them and instead, opted to protect her from his worries. She laid a palm on his cheek, leaning even closer until their lips were merely breaths apart.

She waited. He had to make the move.

It was like he was studying her, trying to figure her out. Then, his lips met hers and she melted. The kiss was tender, as if Itachi was tasting the water. When she only responded with eagerness, she felt as something inside of him shifted.

She felt, more than heard, as he finally breathed, pulling her into himself. His arms suddenly wrapped around her, firm yet so gentle. When she tried to break away, to ask him what was wrong, Itachi only captured her lips once more and any question slipped away into the darkness as she clung to him...

...gentle.

Minori could only think about how gentle he was even as they were suddenly on her bed.

He was gentle even as warm fingers splayed against her bare skin on her back, riding beneath her shirt. She could only think about how Itachi has always been gentle with her as he left her lips to trail her cheeks, her eyes, and her neck. From their first kiss (initiated by him) to the one now, Itachi was always gentle.

Everything, from his touches, his words, and even when he teased her, was gentle.

As if she was fragile and precious to him, as if she would slip away if he was even a little hard on her. As if it was a way to make up for his public indifference and his apathy. For every indifferent gaze, for every time he turned his back to her, Itachi made up for it when they were alone.

So when he paused as he laid his warm fingers on her waist, as if asking for permission, as if giving her a way out, she answered for him and removed her shirt. It was a strange fumbling in the dark. Inexperience and shyness, on both of their parts, made their breathing harsher than usual, but Itachi played it off with tender hands and gentle kisses.

When he paused above her, skin against skin, Minori simply pull him down. When she stopped him, the pain too much, he patiently waited, laying kisses over her neck and shoulder. When he apologized, she kissed him. When she cried, he kissed her...

...Minori knew she should have thought about this more. Giving herself to him. But when at the same time, she couldn't imagine loving anyone the way she loved this boy in her arms.

They were young, so young. Yet both held enough burdens and grief of any adult. He was ANBU captain and she was simple kunoichi. He was the Uchiha heir and she the orphan that the Uchiha never wanted. He had the respect of many and many couldn't even remember her.

More than anything though, as Minori stroked Itachi's back, she knew she should have been more careful with her heart. As gentle as Itachi was with her, he would always love Sasuke more. His loyalty to the Uchiha and to Konoha would always come before her.

And with tonight, she was truly his, body and soul. There was no turning back. Then again, when had she ever had a choice.

She held onto him tightly, his weight slightly hard to breath under, but she had no desire to move out from under the pleasing heaviness of his chest, firm and solid. Safe. And after a short while, she began to drift off.

It was only an hour later, Minori too tired even as she protested against the loss of his warmth, that she felt warm lips against her cheeks.

Maybe it was a dream, but she swore that Itachi, before he left, apologized to her.

…

**The next day**

**Ryuu**

I walked forward, pausing only when I got near enough. I hid my chakra signature, masking my presence as I flashed forward, jumping onto the rooftop, hidden from the three Uchiha, Itachi, and Sasuke. I closed my eyes as I listened.

"Sure thing, but there's something we wanted to ask as well," one of them said.

I heard Itachi's small sound of surprise. The voice continued.

"It's about Uchiha Shisui, who committed suicide by downing himself in the river last night."

My fists clenched. I turned my head away, eyes opening. I could feel Itachi's sudden spike of tension. Another voice spoke out.

"Shisui was the other person who didn't come to the meeting," the new voice said haughtily, "You adored him like your older brother, didn't you?"

At his words, my jaws clenched. Itachi sounded calmer than what I felt.

"That's right. I haven't seen him in a while. It's unfortunate," he said softly.

I shifted a little, jaws unclenching as I laid my hands on my knees. There was a moment of silence following Itachi's words before the same man spoke again.

"So we, the police squad decided to devote all our efforts to investigate this matter."

"Investigate," Itachi actually sounded surprised.

There was a moment of muffling as they shuffled. It was a moment before anyone spoke again.

"This is the farewell note Shisui wrote. The handwriting has been checked. There is no doubt its Shisui's."

"If there is no link to murder, then what is this investigation for," Itachi questioned calmly.

The third voice answered him without hesitance. "By using Sharingan, it would be very easy to copy Shisui's handwriting."

I heard more shuffling as they passed the note to Itachi before the other man spoke again. I closed my eyes, fingers clenching.

I knew the words by heart. Shisui's last words.

"He was Uchiha's best worker," the third voice began proudly, "He's the man known to be feared as the Shisui of Shunshin. He was the man who would be first in line to do any missions for the clan."

"It's hard to think that such a man would write that and kill himself," the second man spoke up, his voice oozing with accusation.

"You shouldn't make judgments about people based on just appearance."

At Itachi's calm reply, I finally stood up.

"At any rate, we'll leave that note with you."

I took a step forward.

"Take that and request ANBU to investigate with us."

"Understand," Itachi whispered.

"I hope we find some clues," the second voice said, "We also have a different route to ANBU. If you were to try and destroy the investigation request, we will find out right away."

I felt as Itachi snapped, the tension spiking. I needed to move. I began walking towards the edge.

"Why don't you say that more directly," Itachi said with deceiving calmness and I felt as the Sharingans became activated, chakra pulsating around us, "are you suspecting me?"

"That's right, you piece of shit," the second man replied.

Anger surged in me.

"Listen up Itachi! Just try and betray the clan—"

And before he could finish or Itachi can even move and Sasuke could blink, I jumped down. Without any effort, I kicked the one with the long hair into the wall and his two companions followed, skipping like rocks next to him without hitting the wall.

I stood up slowly, flexing my fingers as I watched them with impassive eyes.

"What the hell," the man with long hair moaned as he glared up, his sharingan eyes meeting my onyx ones. His eyes widened. "R-Ryuu-san?!"

I stuffed my hands back into my pockets, watching them with lazy eyes and putting up my lazy mask. Itachi and Sasuke whispered my name, but I did not turn to them. I felt as Itachi came to my side, his eyes on me. The three slowly got up, the other two helping the one with long hair. Before anyone can speak, I spoke first.

"You shouldn't judge people base on their appearances. Don't judge Itachi and make light of him," I whispered without any emotions.

I turned my head towards Itachi, then back to them. I hated them at that moment. People like them. In my old world and this world. People like this…are the reasons why I hated the world. Why Shisui had to die. I remember their words just now.

Betray the clan? Really?

"Clan?" I whispered softly, shaking my head, then I chuckled mockingly, the three glaring at me now with rage. "What clan?"

It was funny, horribly hypocritical.

_Clansmen ship_.

Even in this world, I am haunted by the constraints of a clan. I laughed then, the sound escaping before I could stop it. I felt as everything, the pain and the anger, turned into mockery at the cruel fate the world has given me. I felt almost hysteric. Almost crazed.

Even Itachi stared at me in surprise.

* * *

><p>Sasuke trembled. He has never seen Ryuu like this. He has never heard his brother so angry before either and he could not help but be happy that Ryuu had interfered.<p>

He had sense that Itachi was at his breaking point. However, hearing Ryuu laugh with such maniacal mockery made him flinch, fingers tightening on the post of their door. The sound stopped though, Ryuu's hands clenching.

"You three have no right to be accusing Itachi of murdering Shisui," Ryuu whispered roughly.

Sasuke's widened, his breath hitching. Ryuu heard all of that?

One of the man holding the long hair guy spoke, "you don't know this, Ryuu-san, but Shisui had been watching Itachi recently. Half a year after joining ANBU, we could not ignore the strangeness of Itachi's recent behavior—"

"So you accuse him of murdering his own best friend, my cousin," Ryuu said with sudden softness and Sasuke felt chills run up his spine.

"It couldn't be anyone else," the same man argued, eyes opening a little, "Shisui would have never committed suicide! He was too attached to the clan!"

It was then that Sasuke felt as Itachi snapped and this time, Ryuu would not be able to stop him.

Itachi took a step forward.

"Attachment to the organization…attachment to the clan…why 'attach' at all," his aniki whispered with sudden coldness, this time Sasuke freezing in terror. This was not the brother he knew. As Itachi continued, Sasuke's fingers clenched tightly onto the wood.

Itachi continued, "That's merely the detestable action of restraining yourself and limiting your own 'container'."

Sasuke watched as Ryuu turned his head towards Itachi then, whispering the older shinobi's name, but Itachi continued glaring at the three in front of him.

"People fear and hate those they don't understand," Itachi said, "how foolish—"

"Stop, Itachi!"

Everyone flinched, Sasuke noticing that Ryuu was the only one who didn't, as Fugaku's voice broke out, catching the attention of everyone.

Itachi's head snapped towards his father's voice. Fugaku's eyes and face were stern.

"What in the world is going on," he demanded before looking directly at Itachi. "Itachi, you've been acting strangely these days."

There was a second of tense silence, Ryuu turning to look at Sasuke and Sasuke met his calm onyx ones. The two shared a glance. Sasuke frowned even deeper. For once, Ryuu was not smiling at him like he usually would, even as a reassurance.

Ryuu turned back to Itachi as the thirteen year old whispered, "Nothing is strange. I'm just doing what I need to do. That's all."

"Then why didn't you come last night," Fugaku demanded.

"To get closer to the very top."

Itachi's reply made Fugaku falter, elicitating a stutter.

"What do you mean," Fugaku sputtered out.

Sasuke saw as something happened, but it was too fast for him to see. Itachi, from the looks of it, had pulled out a kunai, but before he could do anything with it, Ryuu's hand had shot out, grabbing his wrists. Fugaku's eyes widened at Ryuu and Itachi, the younger Shinobi looking right at Fugaku before turning to Itachi.

"Think of Sasuke," Ryuu whispered softly.

Sasuke saw as Itachi visibly flinched, his aniki showing discernible distress. There was a moment of tense silence before Itachi turned his head to meet Sasuke's eyes. There was a moment of silence, tension slowly lowering.

Sasuke spoke then, finally breaking from his terror.

"Nii-san…"

Itachi turned his head away, looking down. Sasuke saw as his fists clenched.

Suddenly, Itachi made the movement to fall onto his knees, Sasuke's eyes widening even more, but Ryuu stopped Itachi, grabbing his arms. Itachi turned sharp eyes to Ryuu, but the boy simply looked over at Fugaku and the other three men as Fugaku helped them.

"Itachi did not murder Shisui," Ryuu whispered softly, holding Itachi up. "And you three came here to accuse Itachi of this? How impetuous."

Ryuu laughed again, a maniac laughter, making everyone's eyes sharpen. Ryuu shook his head, letting Itachi go. Itachi remained standing, watching Ryuu with close eyes.

Itachi was not sure what to do. He has never seen Ryuu like this. But at his next words, Itachi stiffened.

"In Shisui's letter, he said he has given up hope for this clan," Ryuu began softly, his eyes looking straight at Fugaku, "and I agree. I have given up all hope in this worthless clan also."

There were sharp intakes of disbelief. Sasuke blinked. He recalled Itachi's words about the Uchiha.

How could Ryuu say something like this?

Itachi's eyes were hardened, his arm grabbing for Ryuu's shoulder as if to stop him, but Ryuu ignored him and continued.

"You say Itachi killed Shisui, but what about you," Ryuu whispered, suddenly visibly shaking with rage.

Fugaku's eyes sharpened.

"Ryuu-san, watch your words—"

"Because of people like you that attach themselves to their clan, a thing so petty, we lose sight of the things that are truly important," Ryuu said with sudden determination, his voice rising over Fugaku's. "Shisui understood this. He understood that real change can't occur under restraints and controls, where premonition and imagination are fixed down."

"Such arrogance," Fugaku growled out as the three other men took steps forward in anger.

"That's enough! If you're going to say worthless nonsense like Itachi, we'll put both of you in prison!"

Sasuke's face fell, ignoring what the others were saying and instead focusing on the hard and sternness of Itachi's face and the impassive mask of Ryuu. How could the two people he has always looked up to say such things about the clan? How could Itachi stand there and say nothing to refute Ryuu?!

It was Itachi who told him about the Uchiha's greatness! Yet his nii-san just stood there, looking as if he was agreeing with Ryuu, even if reluctant to show it.

"Nonsense," Ryuu whispered almost hysterically. "Nonsense are the four standing in front of me. Accusing with only assumptions, caring only to elevate themselves."

Then suddenly, Ryuu was no longer laughing, rage filling his voice, "It's because of people like you ruling this clan that Shisui is now gone. That Itachi has to make these sacrifices and why Sasuke is like this—"

"Ryuu," Itachi snapped then, roughly grabbing the boy back, but Ryuu did not budge, his eyes suddenly activated, the sharingan suddenly spinning.

"You want to know who killed Shisui. Go look in the mirror, go look at this precious clan! You pushed him to this point! Are you happy?! Protecting this precious clan, is it worth the lives of innocents? Take a good look at your own mistakes, your own lies, before you start spreading them—"

"That's it," the long hair Uchiha shouted, throwing the others off him as he snapped to Fugaku. "Captain, give us the orders and we will throw him into prison!"

"You will do no such thing," a voice demanded from behind the four.

Everyone snapped around, eyes meeting those of Kaito's stormy onyx ones. Kaito ignored them and instead looked ahead at Ryuu, his eyes softening.

"Ryuu, control yourself."

It was then that Sasuke turned to Ryuu, the boy turning his head aside towards Sasuke. Itachi did the same, consoling Ryuu and it was then that Sasuke saw both of their eyes, the pin wheels turning into something else, something he has never seen before.

He had never seen Sharingans like those. But they were gone as soon as Sasuke saw them, Itachi finally focusing his attention on Sasuke. Sasuke's eyes softened though as Itachi came to him, his older brother laying a hand on his shoulder as the two of them, in unison, turned to Kaito.

"The three of you return to your homes before I order an issue for your release from the Police Squad," Kaito whispered as he walked pass them and to his son.

Ryuu bowed his head, Kaito laying a hand on his shoulder as he turned to Fugaku and the other three. The three threw outraged looks at Kaito.

"You can't do that," the long haired Uchiha growled.

"And you cannot throw a child into prison for simply speaking his mind," Kaito replied back, his chin lifting as he glared at them before turning that same glare to Fugaku. "And as head of this clan, you should not have allowed these three to go so far. You stand there lecturing your son and mine when you should have punished your men."

Kaito shook his head in disgust, glaring back at the three. "My son has found out about his cousin's death last night and has come here to seek comfort from the two boys he consider his closest friends to only have you three demanding his arrest! Explain to me as a father, how should I feel?"

The three men flinched, suddenly looking away. Fugaku on the other hand, returned the glare with a stern determination.

"You should not allow your emotions to obscure your leadership as a council member. Your son has shown contempt for the clan," Fugaku began, but stopped at Kaito's sudden flare of chakra, blue aura coating Kaito's skin as he glared at the head.

"Fugaku," Kaito began softly, Sharingan activated and pulsing, "be careful of what you say to me. Do not forget that it was I who placed you as clan head. Do not make me regret such a decision. As for your earlier advice about my emotions, I should make the same to you. You are a father before you are anything else. The clan is important, but so are your sons. A clan is only as strong as the bonds between families."

Fugaku, at his words, scowled even deeper. "I am doing what is best for this clan."

Kaito straightened, eyes hard. "And arresting our sons will not benefit the clan in anyway. I will allow for this imprudence to be excused today, but only if the three of you leave this minute and Fugaku," he said softly, "we will continue this conversation later."

Fugaku, jaws clenched, barked orders at his men and soon the three were gone. Fugaku ordered Sasuke home and as he passed Kaito, the two ignored each other, Kaito focused on Ryuu and Fugaku, looking straight ahead.

Itachi, watching their interaction, frowned. When Fugaku ignored him and only continued on, Itachi turned his attention to Kaito and Ryuu. The old man was comforting his son, Ryuu looking down at the ground.

At the back of Itachi's mind, he wondered at the boy's sudden change in behavior, at the strange outburst. But even as he pondered on Ryuu's actions and words, he could only turn away from everything and everyone. He immediately began making is way out of the compound.

If Ryuu knew...then that meant _she_ knew too.

...

Minori numbly moved around her kitchen. She breathed out softly even as the tears threatened to spill. With trembling fingers, she attempted to wash the dishes, moving about. But her body protested, still sore from the night before. She felt as her chest fell and rose with each breath, felt as the cool water ran over her fingers as she gave up on the dishes.

Turning around blindly, she went over to the kitchen table and began scrubbing the table. Everything was going to be okay. She trembled as she paused, staring down at the cloth in her hand. Everything wasn't okay though. Everything was—

"Minori."

She flinched, startled. She blinked up and turned around. How had he gotten in without her knowing? H-how—

"Breathe, Minori."

She hadn't realized she wasn't breathing. She let out a shuttered breath, her chest hitching as she shook her head. The towel slipped from her fingers as she reached for him. Itachi, eyes solemn, caught her as she fell forward. He held her up, arms wrapped at her waist as her fingers reached for his shoulder.

His eyes closed as the first sob spilled from her lips. She hid her face into his neck, reversing their roles from last night. Itachi, when she pulled away, attempted to create some distance between them, to talk to her. But when she simply slipped her hands behind his neck and brought his head down, he blinked.

But her gray eyes were watching his closely, desperately. Itachi stiffened when she leaned against him, lips touching his, but not in a kiss. Her trembling fingers slipped beneath his shirt. Itachi's eyes widened for a second, freezing before meeting her eyes.

"No," he stopped her hands, but she shook her head, tears spilling, "Minori. Your body is not ready for—"

"Please."

At her sudden plea, at the sadness and desperation in her eyes, Itachi for once in his life, ignored the warnings in his head. He cupped her cheeks, forehead leaning against hers as he closed his eyes.

"We shouldn't do this," Itachi whispered even as he let her hands go, breath growing heavy as her fingers ran over his bare back.

When she only shook her head, Itachi sighed against her lips. He backed her up until she leaned against her kitchen table. Slowly, he captured her sob, bordering on a moan, and breathed her into his lungs. Without words, Itachi comforted her and for once, Minori greedily took in his affections.

...

Their clothes paved a path to her bedroom. This time Itachi had stayed. However, Minori sat up on the bed, legs thrown over the side with hands clasped on her knees. Itachi studied her back. The covers covered her front only, leaving the slim of her back exposed to him. Slowly, he sat up and moved towards her, kissing her shoulder blade softly before moving to the other side and grabbing his pants.

"You knew."

Itachi, at her words, paused. He turned his head slightly towards her before putting his pants back on.

"Yes."

Minori stiffened. She stared at her fingers. She wanted to ask so many things. How he knew. _What_ he knew.

"They said he committed suicide," she whispered softly.

Itachi made no response, instead, he stood up and made his way around the bed. As he reached for his shirt, he stiffened at her words.

"Itachi, what are you not telling me?"

Itachi refused to turn to her. "This will be the last time I can be with you."

Minori paled at his words. She felt as the strength gave away from her muscles. She stared at him, trying to understand the sudden change. Her heart tightened. Itachi turned to her. His face revealed nothing though. Minori looked away.

There was a moment of tense silence, before she spoke again.

"Are we," she began, voice hitching, "ending this?"

Itachi's eyes sharpened on her, eyes narrowing. "We are only ending our training sessions and I will no longer be able to come for dinner."

When she only seem to wilt in front of him, Itachi faced her fully, eyes softening.

"I will not have time to be with you anymore," he whispered softly. "With Shisui's death, I will expected to work harder for the clan to recuperate for the coup."

At his words, she felt her heart relaxed. She sighed, nodding. She looked up, gray eyes meeting onyx ones.

"I understand," she whispered.

Itachi, at her words, turned away.

_No_, he thought to himself, _you don't._

He closed his eyes, jaw flexing. She didn't know or understand anything. Nor would he want her too. Minori, sensing his sudden change of demeanor, blinked up at him in surprise. She pulled the covers up around her before standing. She made her way to his side. She laid her hand on his shoulder, noticing the tension in his muscle.

"Itachi?"

Itachi shook his head, continuing to look away. "I missed the clan meeting last night."

Minori frowned. "To meet with Shisui?"

Itachi's head lowered, no repsonse. Minori's frown disappeared as she shifted to stand in front of him. She freed one hand to cup his cheeks, the other holding the cover up tightly even as she tilted her head to study him. Itachi's jaws flexed once more, hair covering his eyes.

"Itachi, what happened last night? We both know that Shisui would never commit suicide," she whispered.

At her words, his face tightened, eyes even more hidden. He remained silent, tense. Minori smoothed his jaw, trying to relax the muscles.

"Is this about Sasuke," she whispered.

At her question, his stiffened even more. His jaws clenched beneath her finger tips. Eyes softening, Minori leaned forward, her lips grazing his chin. When she pulled back, her lips were pursed as she continued studying him.

Smiling gingerly, she tried to lighten the mood.

"Sasuke would hate me if he knew I took most of your free time."

Itachi's hand suddenly covered hers, his head leaning into her warmth as his hair covered his eyes even more.

Slowly, Itachi shook his head into her palm.

"If there is anyone my otouto hates, it would be me."

Minori frowned, her eyes furrowing at his tone. Itachi's voice had gone solemn, sad. She straightened and with a blush, let go of the covers that hid her body from view, and used both hands to cup his cheeks.

She lifted his head so she could look at him directly. Itachi's onyx eyes were unreadable, dead almost. The look sent panic through her.

"Sasuke will never hate you, Itachi."

He turned his head away from her, breaking her hold as he scooped down to bring the covers over her body again. With a frown on her lips, Minori held the cover over her body even as Itachi stepped away from her, turning away.

With his back to her, Itachi's head looked straight forward.

"I have a meeting with the hokage today. I," he paused, as if hesitating (but it could't be, Minori thought. Uchiha Itachi, never hesitates), "I promise to try and see you when I can. Goodbye, Minori."

Minori frowned. Without waiting for her reply, Itachi walked out, disappearing as silently as he appeared. Minori felt as her heart clenched. Itachi would never lie to her, but she couldn't help but feel a sense of dread.

Unbeknownst to her, she will not see him for months and by then...it'll be too late.

**[The beginning to the Massacre: Shisui's Death]**

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><p><strong>~TBC~<strong>

* * *

><p><em>AN: Wow. Naruto...is over. NOOO. What am I to do now? Fanfic, ofc, but...man. _

_BUT, next chapter will be wrapping up the Uchiha Massacre (FINALLY) and also there will be a time gap to the canon story of when they are 12, so a 5 year time gap._

_Thanks everyone (and seriously, my Inu fan must hate me for my obvious favoritism of...well, this.) _

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><p><em>Thanks for reading though and tell me what you think. Hope everyone is good.<em>


	15. The Uchiha Massacre

_**Disclaimer: **I disclaim Naruto! Even if I badly want to claim him. _

* * *

><p><strong>"I just need to endure it...even if all of me dies..." - Love You to Death, Dong Young-bae<strong>

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><p><em><strong>15 - The Uchiha Massacre<strong>_

Itachi will never love another as he have Uchiha Minori. He studied her silent figure by the door way. She'd come, like he knew she would, to Jakuno's home. It was why he told Madara to stay away from this side of the compound. It's why he chose to kill Jakuno last before his parents.

She showed no fear, not even shock, at his bloodied ANBU armor and his katana soaked with the life of their clansmen. She was silent and so still.

She didn't scream. She didn't curse him. She didn't react at all. She simply set aside her medical kit and walked _towards_ him. He panicked. Why would she—then she _smiled_.

And Itachi felt as his heart broke.

Their eyes met. It was then that Itachi knew. Minori never expected him to choose her. Not over his duties, not over the village…and not over his brother. He saw the acceptance in her sad gray eyes, eyes that have captured him since their first meeting. He remembered it like it was yesterday.

It had been right after her father died.

_"I am sorry for your loss."_

_"Thank you, Itachi-san," her mother whispered with a bow as the little Minori watched him with those unblinking gray eyes._

Her mother had been protective of her, even in front of him. He knew it was because his father, the head of the clan, had been threatening to take Minori from her.

Fast forward a year later, at the academy.

_"Itachi-san's smile makes me want to smile too."_

Her words, spoken so softly, had shocked him. He'd been thinking about his otouto's upcoming birth when she told him that. It was the first time she'd spoken to him. It was the first time he realized she watched him just as much as he watched her.

Fast forward another year to their third meeting. After her mother's funeral.

At six years old, he'd stood beside her as his father argued with her maternal grandparents about raising her within the clan. Itachi had stiffly, awkwardly, stood next to her and in a calm and passive voice, told her words that she claimed was the reason she fell in love with him at the tender age of eight.

_"Don't cry, Minori-chan. I'll protect you."_

He had meant those words for comfort only. She'd been so silent, so like him, but without the fight, without the strength to protect herself. She'd just lost both of her parents and his father simply wanted to keep the Uchiha kekkei genkai within the clan. No one cared about her.

Someone had to protect her…and he'd chosen himself.

But she never expected much from him. She'd always let him be, not caring that she only stayed in his shadows. She'd gotten along quick with Shisui, the older man doting on her as an older brother.

_"The two of you would be cute together."_

Shisui's teasing voice came to him then. Shisui, his best friend and hers. He knew, with Shisui's death, Minori would truly have no one, but him now.

_"I think you're beautiful."_

Those words, his confession after Shisui's constant badgering, started their relationship. He could remember the blush that appeared on her cheeks, the way she looked away from him, so shy and so…so innocent.

His chest ached.

He stared at the katana in his hand. When he looked back at her and she only continued to smile sadly at him, he froze. Suddenly she reached for his face and as her warm fingers cradled his cheeks, wiping away the tears he didn't realize were falling, Itachi felt as something inside of him wilted.

He loved this girl. He'll never love another. As soon as everything was completed, when he was no longer needed and Sasuke was strong enough to protect himself, Itachi'll join her in the afterlife. Knowing that she'll be there when he died, he accepted his fate.

He will die with a smile on his face so that when he met her again, she'll only see his smile.

With that acceptance, of her death and his, Itachi breathed out softly, harshly. He grabbed onto her hand and pulled them away, fighting his reluctance.

He _loved_ her…

…but he loved Sasuke even more.

His hands shook when she closed her eyes and he raised the sword over the heart she'd given him. The heart he'd promise to hold and protect. The heart that he would forever cherish until his dying days.

He plunged the sword downwards, his own heart shattering.

* * *

><p><span><em><strong>One Month Earlier<strong>_

* * *

><p><strong>Kinnara<strong>

I stared at the fish in my hand, frowning.

"Concentrate." Chiyo's soft command, for once, was kind.

I pursed my lips, once again searching for the chakra inside of me. It was the strangest feeling ever. No words can explain it. The chakra was alive. It flowed through me like blood, it touched every corner. I breathed out softly as I reached for the chakra flowing from my fingers.

It was a soft, warm, and vibrant, yet also painstakingly shy as it touched the tip of my mind. Everyone had different signatures, different colors. I have yet to see mine or any, really.

Yashamaru, whenever he healed me, had a dense chakra signature, warm yet cool. Chiyo's was lively and hot (like a gentle flame entering your body). Ebizo, when he showed me his, was a calm cool, so soft and gentle that it didn't even feel like chakra.

"With practice, it'll come naturally, but for now," Chiyo looked over my shoulder, "focus on how it beckons you. Only you know how to control your chakra."

I nodded numbly, eyes furrowing together. Slowly, I nudged it forward through my fingertips, my skin warming at the sudden rush of chakra towards my hands. When the green aura appeared around the fish, the cut slowly mending, I grinned.

However, as soon as my concentration faltered at my joy, the chakra inside of me also fluctuated with joy. It disrupted, chakra flowing through my body instead of focusing onto my fingers. When the green aura faded, I frowned once more.

**_Your emotions affect the way it flows, kid._**

I blinked, staring down at the fish. Shukaku's words only made things more complicated. How the hell am I supposed to be calm when healing someone? Especially in the battle field?

I sighed.

I noticed Chiyo frowning from the corner of my eyes. She came to stand in front of me.

"It is similar to the way you control the sand."

"The sand is outside of me," I mumbled, eyes furrowing together.

Chiyo seem to sigh. "Try once more. Then we will head over to practice tree walking. Then fish for dinner!"

I sighed, groaning inwardly even as Shukaku's chuckle filled my mind.

…

Yashamaru paused as he stopped by the doorway of Gaara's and Kinnara's room. Well, what used to be the twins room. Due to Kinnara's training with Chiyo, Gaara has been staying with the Kazekage as to increase his hours in training with his father.

It was quiet now, without them. Especially Kinnara.

Yashamaru sighed as he quickly passed the room.

Kinnara, his niece. The seer.

He pursed his lips as he made his way to the kitchen. Yes. Seer.

On the night she had returned from her first trip with Chiyo and Ebizo, a week ago, she had finally revealed to him her secret. She was a seer.

Yashamaru rubbed his face, sighing. A jinchuuriki and a seer who has memories of her past life. He only knew a little about her old life. That she had a family and a man—boy?—she loved. She had been a scholar. And now, she was training to become a medical nin.

He stopped by the living room, staring down at the photo of his sister.

"Did you know your daughter was a seer," he asked out loud.

He blinked at the photo. His heart warmed.

"She would have kept you on your feet, nee-san."

His eyes softened. Turning away, he returned to cleaning his empty home.

…

Gaara stared out the window. He was in the Kazekage tower, his father's office. The Kazekage was doing paperwork, Gaara helping him clean the office and carefully placing books away. Or he had been.

He had found a picture of his mother among the pile of books in the Kazekage's office. After studying it, he realized just how much Kinnara looked like their mother.

The photo was still in his hand as he stared out the window.

He wondered what Kinnara was doing now.

"Gaara," the stern voice called him away from the window.

The Kazekage was looking at him with stern eyes, but not unkind ones. Gaara quickly slipped the photo into his sleeves and continued stacking books away.

The sooner he finished, the sooner the Kazekage can finish. Then their training can begin. Gaara had to become stronger, especially now that Kinnara was off becoming stronger.

He will protect her.

…

**Konoha**

Sasuke stared at the ground as he made his way home, walking across the pier. His father had already left, Sasuke opting to stay by the water a little longer to muse over his father's words.

"Sasuke!"

Startled, he looked up. At the end of the pier, Ryuu waved at him. Heart lifting, Sasuke grinned as he ran over. All thoughts of what his father just said gone as he jumped to Ryuu's side.

Ryuu smiled gently at him. Sasuke stopped short.

"I did it!"

Ryuu's eyes closed as he smiled wider. "See, I told you. All that practice was worth it, ne?"

Sasuke nodded his head eagerly as Ryuu began leading them away from the pier and in the direction of their home. Sasuke, as they walked, slowly lost his happiness. Ryuu looked at him from the side of his eyes.

"What's wrong?"

Sasuke's eyes furrowed together in confusion. "Otousan told me to stop chasing nii-san."

If Sasuke had paid closer attention, he would have noticed that Ryuu, at his words, had sharply turned away. However, when he did look up at Ryuu, his friend had already been looking away, straight ahead.

"He's just worried about you, especially with what happened after Shisui's death."

Sasuke frowned, lips pursing at the mention of Shisui's death. He looked down at the ground. Silence fell between them. Sasuke took glances at Ryuu's back.

"Are you okay, Ryuu-nii?"

…

**Ryuu**

I frowned at his words. Was I okay?

Not really.

If anything, I killed Shisui. I could have stopped him. I could have saved him. I could save them all. But I won't…hesitating even at the thought of saving Minori. I wasn't okay.

But I didn't say this. Instead, I turned my head to him, frown softening.

Sasuke's face held bandages and scratches. Studying him, I felt as my heart clenched.

His face was so expressive of his concern and care for me, for everyone. Stopping, I reached forward, arm wrapping around his shoulder. We were the same height, same age, yet so different.

Sasuke, at my touch, turned his head to me. I smiled at him, as much of a smile I could muster, and nodded slowly as we began walking again with my arm around his shoulder.

"I'll be okay. But, don't worry. I know your otousan doesn't hate Itachi."

Sasuke, at my words, relaxed. His body drooped as the tension left his body.

"Hai," he whispered. He took another quick glance at me. "Ne, Ryuu-nii?"

"Hmm," I hummed as we continued walking. I looked away from him, straight forward.

"What's wrong with your sharingan?"

I stiffened. He felt as I stiffened, his body tensing up in return. However, I relaxed and turned to him. I kept a smile on my face.

"You should ask your otousan."

Sasuke frowned at me. He opened his mouth, but I shook my head.

"I learned from chichi. It's only right that you learn from yours, ne?"

Sasuke blinked. Nodding slowly, he let the subject go. To change the tension, I quickly knocked our heads together.

"Hey, let's practice today."

Sasuke quickly lightened up, turning to me with bright eyes. "You have time today?!"

Guilt crushed my chest as I nodded at him. "Yes, I do. After dinner?"

Sasuke nodded eagerly, openly happy now.

If only I could continue to keep him like this. I looked away from his happy face. I knew it wasn't long now, until it happened.

Looking up at the sun, I realized then that I was late to a dinner date.

…

I waited patiently as Naruto finished his dinner. He glared at me. Beneath the mask, I couldn't help but grin.

"You'll get ramen later."

His glare turned into a pout as he obediently finished the fried greens on his plate. I looked around his small apartment, happy to see that he'd kept it clean.

"Are you ever going to take off your mask, No Face?"

At his nickname for me, I turned back to him. I simply shook my head even as he continued to whine and complain about how unfair I was.

Naruto's a good kid. I just wished I could do more for him besides cleaning his house and cooking for him. When I helped him wash the dishes, he told me the story of his day.

I listened to him chatter, unable to believe that the future hokage of Konoha stood before me. At least with Naruto…I could save him.

**_Maybe he'll save you too._**

I froze, the feminine words entering my mind. It sounded familiar, as if I should know it, but I didn't. I clenched my jaws. Naruto turned to me, his smile slipping as he noticed my tension.

"What's wrong, No Face?"

I blinked. Turning to him, I quickly spoke with reassurance.

"Nothing. Nothing at all."

Naruto, after studying me with his bright eyes, shrugged and went back to washing the dishes. I turned away from him, fists clenched.

I needed to talk to mind-Xen. Soon. The last time I saw him was a day before Shisui entered my Takama-ga-hara.

Mind-Xen, the ghost of who I once was.

It was strange. He was me and I was him, yet he's still there inside of my Takama-ga-hara. He wasn't always there. After Kumo, it was just me. However, I'm not sure what happened, but after my argument with Haru over what to do about the Uchiha Massacre, he was suddenly inside of my Takama-ga-hara.

It was fine, really. He understood me (he was me, after all), but…I was uneasy.

He was hiding something from me. I knew it.

But he was me so getting him to spill…well, let's just say, I had a better chance of going into Naruto's Takama-ga-hara and talking to Kurama then getting mind-Xen to tell me anything.

I was Xen. Yet he was too. It was all too confusing.

I sighed.

Damn, this was harder than I thought it would be. I needed to focus though. The Uchiha massacre was happening any day now. I needed to plan everything accordingly. I knew the trigger.

It was just a waiting game now though.

…

* * *

><p><em>One month later, the morning of the massacre (current day) <em>

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><p><strong>Konoha<strong>

Sasuke made his way out of his home, happy.

His father didn't hate his brother. Reflecting on the conversation he just had with his parents, Sasuke sighed in relief. He thought back to Itachi's last words to him that morning before his nii-san left. Itachi hadn't changed either.

Smiling, Sasuke made his way past his home to only be met with a lone figure, standing outside of his home. Smile widening, Sasuke jumped to Ryuu's side, hugging him.

"Ryuu-nii!"

…

**Ryuu**

I smiled, knocking shoulders with Sasuke. He was very happy today, wonder why.

"You're happy this morning. That excited that I'm walking you to school today?"

Sasuke laughed. "Iie. You've been walking with me for a month now! I did what you said though. I talked to my father about your eyes. It's the Mangekyo Sharingan, right?"

My heart stopped. I faltered in my steps. Sasuke frowned at me, but I ignored him. My mind spun. He talked to Fugaku about the Mangekyo. He. Talked. To. Fugaku. Mangekyo…that means…that means.

It was _today_.

Heart growing cold, I stiffly turned to Sasuke. "Did you tell your otousan I had them?"

Sasuke blinked, shaking his head. I could sense his sudden fear. I needed to control myself. I quickly smiled at him, fighting down the sudden chill. My heart was pounding though even as I tried to be as calm as I could.

"Iie. But he told me that only a few have them. How did you get yours? He said it was only through a special condition can you get them. I want them too, one day! So I can be as strong as nii-san and Ryuu-nii!"

At his words, I stiffened even more, my heart squeezing. I looked away. I debated about what I should do. I knew this day would come. I knew and yet, here, presented with the evidence, I froze. Damn it.

Damn, damn, damn.

"Ryuu-nii?"

I shook my head, turning to Sasuke.

"If you want to be as strong as me, beat me to school."

Without another word, I ran. I couldn't face Sasuke right now. I heard his sudden stutter of shock before his happy laugh followed behind me as he gave chase.

The whole time as I ran, all I could do was only think. I had to think.

Reaching the school gates first, I stopped short. My fingers clenched. I sensed Sasuke's chakra signature was a bit further behind. I cursed under my breath. I was so distracted that I hadn't been controlling my speed.

I looked past the kids running past me. I also ignored the whispers. Tonight. It had to be tonight. Sasuke even came out of his home with his lunch box.

"Ryuu-nii?"

I snapped to attention. I met Haru's pale Byakugan. I blinked. Behind him, Hinata peeked at me. She blushed as our eyes met. Haru, at my obvious distress, frowned at me.

"What's wrong?"

I shook my head, smiling. Haru couldn't know.

"Sasuke's just taking his time. We raced here," I quickly responded with a casual wave of my hand.

"Ryuu-kun!"

I groaned. I turned and sure enough, Ino and Sakura along with a bunch of other…little girls were making their way to me. I am now reminded why I do not like sending Sasuke to school. I've been able to avoid this for the past month.

"Ryuu-kun, what are you doing here?"

"Where's Sasuke-kun?"

"You're sending Sasuke-kun to school, aren't you?!"

"How cute!"

I eyed them warily, especially Ino and Sakura. Holy shit. Fan girls are real. They are scary. And to think, Ino would become so strong and Sakura, the apprentice of a Sannin. I heard Haru chuckle besides me.

I glowered at him, hiding my panic still. I had time. I calmed myself, breathing softly. I turned my eyes to Hinata, ignoring everyone.

"Hinata-chan, have you seen Naruto-kun?"

I heard the girls behind me shout in exasperation. One, for me talking so friendly with Hinata and second, mentioning Naruto.

At Naruto's name, Hinata blushed a deeper red. I felt Haru's glare on me as he blocked Hinata from my view. I've always found it so odd how protective Haru was to Hinata, even though he knows about Hinata's crush over Naruto.

"We haven't seen him."

"He's probably late, like always," a girl muttered behind me.

"What are you talking about, Sakura-chan!?"

Everyone turned as one to the sudden appearance of Naruto, standing not far from us. He looked worriedly at his crush (Kami-sama help us).

"The future hokage is never late, dattebayo!"

"Shut up, loser," Sakura retorted.

I stared at her and the other girls. Why were they so mean? I blocked them from Naruto's view, catching the sad look on Naruto's face at being put down by his crush. I smiled at him, rubbing his hair.

This is the first time we've interacted in public. I could see the surprise on Naruto's face and heard the few shock gasps of the girls behind me. I felt Haru's eyes boring into my back. I ignored them and instead, focused on Naruto.

"Ne, Naruto-kun, don't look like that. The future hokage shouldn't let what others tell them let him down, right?"

"Yea!" He jumped up, striking the air. "You're Ryuu, right?"

I nodded.

"How do you know Ryuu-nii, dobe?"

I blinked. Sasuke was finally here. He was frowning at us. Well, specifically at Naruto.

Oh. Yea, first time interacting with Naruto in front of others. I squeezed Naruto's shoulder before letting him go and slugging an arm over Sasuke's shoulder. I brought him over to Naruto, who was glaring at his rival.

"Sasuke, be nice."

Sasuke frowned. "What's so special about him?"

"What part of nice, don't you understand," I stressed.

Sasuke continued frowning at me until Naruto spoke up.

"Yea, teme! Be nice!"

Sasuke glared at Naruto from my side. "Shut it, dobe. You're not worth Ryuu-nii's time."

"What did you say!?"

Sasuke suddenly left me, stepping towards Naruto with a smirk.

"I said you're not worth his time, dobe."

Naruto, glowering, started verbally attacking Sasuke. Which only sparked the fan girls from behind me to start attacking Naruto physically. I groaned.

Children. I was among children. Before I could interfere and save Naruto, Iruka suddenly appeared. He glared at the group of girls and Naruto.

"Get to class everyone! Now. Naruto, stop causing trouble."

Quickly, everyone disappeared. Naruto picked himself up, wincing, before scrambling to class as he called out a goodbye to me. Before Sasuke left though, I caught his arm. He looked at me, surprise. I flexed my jaw.

"Wait for me after school today. I want to walk you home, k?"

Sasuke grinned, happy to hear that I was going to spend more time with him.

"Okay!" He turned away, but then turned back with a frown. "You have to explain to me about the dobe, though."

I let out a strained laugh. "Okay."

Satisfied with my answer, Sasuke left. Iruka, watching his last student go, turned to Haru and I. The two of us turned to him. Iruka studied us.

"I didn't realize you were acquainted with Naruto, Ryuu-san."

I blinked. So he saw that, did he? Funny that he did nothing about the way the other children talked about Naruto or how he seem to blame Naruto. Iruka has not gotten his dose of Naruto-therapy jutsu yet. Hiding my anger, I nodded slowly.

"Hai."

At my short and clipped answer, Iruka shuffled uncomfortable before turning his attention to Haru.

"It's good to see you again Haru-san. Hinata-chan is always more attentive in class when you send her."

Haru smiled. "That's good to hear. I'll send her more often. Take care of my imouto, Iruka-sensei."

Iruka smiled. "No problem. I'll see the two of you later."

He nodded at me, smile faltering a little at my glare in his direction. Excusing himself, he disappeared towards the school. Turning to Haru, I caught his eyes.

"What are your plans today?"

I shrugged. "Nothing"

Haru blinked. "Want to train?"

I shook my head, looking away from him. "I'm going to train with Sasuke today. Then I'm going to check up on Minori, you know? She's still…taking Shisui's death hard."

Haru nodded slowly, understanding in his eyes. "Okay. I'll see you tomorrow?"

I nodded, throat clenching. Haru, smiling, waved goodbye as he made his way back to his home. Watching after him, I silently apologized.

…

I stopped by the kitchen door, staring at my mother's back. Hizuki, as if sensing me, stopped and turned around. Her kind eyes smiled at me, her wrinkles deepening.

"Ryuu, welcome home."

I swallowed the lump in my throat. "I'm…home."

_Home_. Fingers clenching into my side, turned away from her and instead, found Kaito walking inside from our back garden. He went over to Hizuki, kissing her hands before turning to me.

"Ryuu," he greeted warmly. "How was sending Sasuke to school?"

I clenched my sides even harder. "It went well. The children…were restless."

Hizuki laughed at my words as she came over to me and smoothed my cheeks as she kissed my forehead. At her touch, my whole body relaxed into her warmth. But it was gone too soon.

"Ryuu, be nice. You're the same age as they are."

Physically, yes. My eyes followed her figure as she turned back and began preparing for lunch. Kaito beckoned me towards him.

"A game of shogi on this wonderful day, son?"

_Son_.

My heart wilted within my chest. My parents. Mine. I shook my head. Kaito frowned. I quickly spoke before he could.

"I'm training with Gai-san today."

Kaito's frown only deepened at the mention of the tai jutsu master.

"Hai, take care then."

I nodded and quickly left, but paused at the door. I looked back at them. My parents. Kaito was focused on Hizuki, helping her. I trembled.

_My parents_.

I clenched my jaw. I took a step towards them. I took another step. Just to hug them. To tell them I loved them. Kaito's only fault was that he loved me too much. Hizuki...was that she was blind to the darker nature of her husband.

I took another step, but stopped myself. I blinked. I shook my head and turned away.

No attachments. No emotions.

No burdens. I must kill my heart.

Isn't that what I learned before?

Those with nothing, will have nothing to anchor them.

I fought back the sob though as I walked away.

I love you. I wanted to say those words to them. I quickly left the house.

There was no turning back now.

Goodbye, mom. Dad.

…

I scanned the area. I was at Haru and my special place away from Konoha.

Sensing no one, I activated my Mangekyo Sharingan and quickly transported myself inside. It was the strangest feeling. My whole body shattered into pieces and the pieces faded as quickly as it shattered.

**…**

**Takama-ga-hara**

_I felt, rather than saw, the soft carpeted floor first. Blinking, I looked around. I stared past the windows at the skyscrapers. _

_"**It's happening?**"_

_I turned towards the voice. It's still unnerving to see my old body, up and about with a mind of its own. I wonder if I entered Haru's Takama-ga-hara if I would encounter Haru in Su's body or a mind-Su like this mind-Xen._

_I nodded. "**Tonight, if the memory is right.**"_

_"**Sasuke learned about the Mangekyo?**"_

_I nodded again. At my nod, Xen only blinked. He came to stand by my side and I studied him. I wonder if I would grow to be this tall again. I had stopped growing by the time I was sixteen. _

_"**Let me take over tonight.**"_

_I frowned. "**What?**"_

_Xen turned to me, eyes unreadable and face stoic. "**You can't do this yourself.**"_

_I glared at him. "**I can and I will. This is not your family.**"_

_"I**sn't it? I thought we were the same person.**"_

_Caught by my own words, I shut my mouth and looked away. "**It's not possible, anyways.**"_

_"**Yes it is.**"_

_At his confident answer, I turned back to him. He stared back at me with brown eyes. It was eerie to look at yourself yet not. _

_"**And how do you know that?**"_

_"**I know more about Ame than you do.**"_

_"**How?**"_

_Xen simply shook his head. "**I live here, don't I?**"_

_I blinked at his simple answer. I huffed a little before crossing my arms. Xen sighed softly, his eyes reflecting frustration before falling back to its passive gaze. _

_"**Do you know what Ame means in Japanese?**"_

_"**Heaven**," I said without hesitance. _

_"**And rain**," Xen whispered as he looked out the window. "**Ame is a dojutsu that allows its user to connect the material and immaterial world to the user's Takama-ga-hara. It also allows you to enter the Takama-ga-hara of others along with transporting you to places you've been. The rain that connects heaven to any place on earth that will allow for rain.**"_

_I already knew this. "**Why are you telling me this?**"_

_"**Because you're not listening,**" Xen said softly, turning back to me with apathetic eyes, "**It connects the two worlds. It's a gateway.**"_

_I blinked. "**So it works both ways?**"_

_"**Yes, but since I have no material body, I must use yours.**"_

_I uncrossed my arms, head shaking. "**Even if it's possible, I don't need your help. I've planned this and I can do it by myself.**"_

_"**And what exactly is your plan?**"_

_"**The massacre has to happen.**" At his nod, I continued. "**But I must save Minori.**"_

_"**Why just her?**"_

_I looked away. "**I promised Su.**"_

_"**You mean you promised Haru.**"_

_I glared at him. "**They're the same.**"_

_"**Are they? Does that mean you're admitting that you're Ryuu too or will you finally admit that I'm the real Xen?**"_

_I frowned. "**I don't need this from you. As soon as I figure out how to get rid of you, I will.**"_

_Xen shrugged. "**Suit yourself.**"_

_I turned to leave, but he stopped me with a hand on my shoulder. At the touch, I jolted. I turned to him and to my surprise, there was concern in his eyes even as his face remained stoic._

_"**Be careful. Itachi is not to be trifled with.**"_

_I paused. I turned to him. "**I have time to spare.**"_

_Xen blinked at my words. He studied me closely before nodding._

_"**Spar?**"_

_I looked down at my hands. I can control how long I'm inside of this. It won't be hours until the massacre happen. I don't want see anyone. I don't want to be tempted to go back home._

_Plus, training with Xen—I mean myself—will help. Mind-Xen has never taken it easy with me and has killed me a few times. I've killed him in return. I can't die in my own mind. _

_I clenched my fingers. Looking back up, I nodded._

_"**Spar.**"_

…

* * *

><p><em>Hours later, night falling: where we left off...<em>

* * *

><p><strong>Massacre<strong>

Itachi stiffened as a body flew at him, pushing him away from Minori. But by then it was already too late. The sword that had plunged down hit Minori, just not where it was intended. He froze as his sword slashed her shoulder, the cut deep and painful, almost amputating her.

His heart stuttered at her whimper of pain as she collapsed and his sword was pulled away. Itachi straightened and quickly masked his emotions. He focused on who had caught him (and Madara) on surprise.

Catching sight of the familiar figure, Itachi felt the blood drain from his face.

"Ryuu."

The boy was kneeling on the floor, hands trying to stop Minori's bleeding. The boy had taken off his shirt to try and wrap the wound. Itachi took a hesitant step forward, but stopped himself on time and quickly masked his emotions.

He was hoping to deal with Ryuu when he came back from picking Sasuke up as he's been doing for the past month. This just meant he'll deal with Ryuu now.

"Minori!"

The boy was visibly shaken, but to Itachi's surprise, he wasn't shocked to find Itachi killing Minori. Why is that?

When Ryuu began using the healing jutsu though, hands growing green, Itachi moved. He flashed to Ryuu's side and slashed at Ryuu, but the boy dodged t the last minute, flipping to avoid Itachi's blade.

"Let me save her, Itachi!"

Itachi's eyes hardened. "Mangekyo Sharingan!"

Ryuu quickly closed his eyes, refusing to meet Itachi's. Itachi, when his eyes closed, frowned. He moved forward though, to attack.

The boy was fast though and quickly dodged.

"Damn it! Itachi, stop!"

Itachi ignored him and quickly attacked again. The two danced around the room, Itachi continued in his attacks and Ryuu, surprisingly, continued dodging with his eyes closed. He was sliced only three times.

Itachi glanced over at Minori. Her blood was pooled all around her, her breathing growing weaker as time went by. Realizing that it would be impossible to deal with Ryuu without killing him, he quickly flashed to Minori's side, sword raised.

He didn't have to wait long until Ryuu realized what was happening.

"No! Itachi!"

Itachi, at his opening, turned his eyes to Ryuu and sure enough, the boy was looking him straight in the eyes. Jaws clenched, Itachi didn't hesitate.

"Tsukuyomi!"

And the world went dark for Ryuu. His last thoughts, before the Tsukuyomi captured him, was a silent curse as Minori's dying body disappeared from his darkening view.

...

Sasuke sighed as he finally made his way home. Ryuu never showed up. He looked up at the sky. It was dark now. What would his parents say?

He wondered what happened to Ryuu.

Quickening his pace, Sasuke made his way home. He'll talk to Ryuu later. He was sure there was an excuse.

Ryuu would never lie to him.

…

* * *

><p><em>Later that night<em>

* * *

><p><strong>Hyuuga Compound<strong>

Haru was tickling Hanabi when the news came. There was the shuffling, the muffle of voices, shouts. It was unlike the Hyuugas to make such a ruckus. Frowning, the Hyuuga heir quickly patted Hanabi's head and left her with Hinata.

Hinata, eyes wide, watched as her brother left the common room, sliding the door behind him shut as he reassured her with a soft smile. However, as soon as the door closed, Haru was frowning.

A branch member ran pass him, but Haru quickly caught him. Startled, the branch member snapped to attention when he realized who it was that had stopped him.

"Haru-sama," he whispered, bowing his head.

"What's going on?"

The branch member hesitated, unsure of what to tell him. "There has been a red alert for all shinobis. The Hokage sent this message out."

Haru stiffened. "Where is chichiue?"

"Haru," the Hyuuga head replied, appearing from the corner.

He'd been searching for his son already. The head of the clan dismissed the branch member and quickly beckoned his son to him. Haru hurried to his side and the two walked away from the common room. As they walked, Hiashi ordered branch members about, demanding for security to heighten and for his daughters to have constant guard.

"What has happened," Haru finally asked when Hiashi stopped walking, the two standing in front of the Hyuuga compound gates as members ran about.

With them were three guards, the branch members following close behind the head and heir. Hiashi turned his gaze to his heir. He pondered on rather or not his son, at eleven years now, could handle the truth. Looking away, Hiashi finally spoke.

"There has been an incident at the Uchiha compound."

Hiashi noticed the way his son stiffened from the corner of his eyes. Looking back at him, Hiashi frowned. He realized then, looking at the distress and paling of his son's face, that the boy was good friends with an Uchiha.

"There hasn't been much information, but I am sure all is right. The Uchiha will not fall that easily."

Haru, at his father's words, stared at the ground. His head was spinning.

This couldn't be. As his father continued giving orders, Haru trembled. It happened. It happened…and he didn't even know. Ryuu.

"I must go find Ryuu."

"No," Hiashi spoke harshly, eyes stern. "You will remain here and protect your sisters."

Haru's eyes widened. He opened his mouth to protest, but Hiashi gave him a glare.

"Haru, you are the Hyuuga heir. You cannot jeopardize yourself for the sake of another clan," he whispered then turned to two guard. "Keep him here. Do not let him out of your site. Return him to his sisters."

Without another glance at Haru, Hiashi dismissed them and Haru, unable to stop them without getting them in trouble, followed the two branch members as they kindly asked him to return with them.

Hiashi, watching his son go, relaxed. He knew that whatever it was, it wasn't good. He hated lying to Haru, but Hiashi knew how close his son was to the Uchiha boy. Jaws clenching, Hiashi turned back to the gate just as the messenger arrived.

"Report."

The messenger nodded, whispering softly of the news. Hiashi, as soon as the messenger left, knew that nothing would be the same.

…

**Takama-ga-hara**

_I flinched. I scrambled around, but the room was blank, white, and an empty space. I clenched my fists._

_"**Xen!**"_

_"**Ryuu.**"_

_I swirled around. Xen stood across from me, arms crossed and face emotionless as he watched me. I flashed in front of him, glowering._

_"**What happened? Why did I black out?**"_

_"**You didn't listen to me. I told you that if you get caught in his Tsukuyomi, the only way to prevent Minori from dying would be for me to take over.**"_

_"**Damn you! I didn't need your help!**"_

_Xen, for once, glared at me. "**You keep saying that yet hours ago, if I hadn't stepped in, Minori would be dead.**"_

_"**H-hours?**"_

_Xen sighed. "**Even with Ame, Tsukuyomi can take a lot of you.**"_

_"**Why doesn't it affect you then?**"_

_"**Because Tsukuyomi is a genjutsu. It affects the mind. I don't have a mind since I am a part of your mind.**"_

_I looked away, eyes squeezing shut. "**What happened?**"_

_"**I took care of Itachi.**"_

_I snapped to him. "**What does that mean?**"_

_"**It means he's done what he's needed to Sasuke and I saved Minori.**"_

_"**How did you convince Itachi to let her live,**" I asked, curious yet angry that he's done all this without me._

_Xen simply shrugged. "**We talked.**"_

_I deadpanned. "**You talked? With Itachi?**"_

_Xen tilted his head at me, eyes unblinking. "**You doubt me?**"_

_"**I don't trust you,**" I muttered._

_"**You don't trust yourself then?**"_

_I clenched my fingers. "**Just tell me what you did and return me to my body.**"_

_Xen shook his head. "**I thought you don't need me.**"_

_"**I don't.**"_

_Xen glared at me once more before masking his emotions again. "**I'll return you to your body. You're almost fully healed and should be waking up soon. Talk to the doctors about Sasuke and Minori's condition. They'll tell you everything.**"_

_Then a door appeared next to me. I turned to him._

_"**You're not going to tell me what happened, are you?**"_

_"**You don't need me.**"_

_Teeth clenching, I turned. When my hands wrapped around the handle, he stopped me._

_"**Ryuu.**"_

_"**I'm Xen,**" I snapped._

_There was a moment of silence before he finally talked again._

_"**What will you do now? With your parents and everyone gone?**"_

_I stared at the door knob._

_"**I'll do what I've always done. ****Endure. Even if all of me dies. You should understand that.**"_

_Without another word, I opened the door and entered it, leaving him behind._

...

...

...

..

Sasuke woke with a start. A dream?

But at the pain on his arm as he shifted, fully awakened him. Wincing, Sasuke reached for where it hurt. He gingerly touched his arm. He lifted his sleeve and to his horror, saw bandages.

The memories flooded back.

Itachi. His parents. His clan.

They were all—

"Sasuke."

Sasuke flinched, turning his head at the familiar voice. It couldn't be. Itachi said he killed them all.

"R-Ryuu-nii?"

Sasuke quickly sat up, but winced. Ryuu was at his side at once, helping him sit up. Sasuke stared at him in shock, in horror. He couldn't believe it. Ryuu looked at him grimly.

"I," Sasuke shook his head, hands grabbing his hair, "I had a dream. I-Itachi…"

He couldn't finish the sentence, eyes squeezing shut. Suddenly, Ryuu was climbing on the bed with him and as Sasuke squeezed his eyes harder, hands fisting the hospital sheets, Ryuu hugged him. Sasuke buried his head into Ryuu's chest.

"It wasn't a dream," Ryuu whispered softly. "Sasuke, I'm sorry."

At his words, Sasuke shook his head in denial. He tried to push Ryuu away, but the other boy just hugged him tighter. Sasuke began crying, then sobbing loudly. He screamed at Ryuu.

"You're lying! Stop lying! Why?! WHY ARE YOU LYING TO ME!?"

As Sasuke kicked and punched him, Ryuu simply held on and endured, all the while, gently rocking Sasuke and rubbing his back.

"I'm sorry," Ryuu whispered, over and over.

Sasuke, after a while, stopped kicking and punching. He simply cried, arms tightly wrapped around Ryuu.

…

**Ryuu**

I gently laid Sasuke to sleep. He'd drifted off after another hour of crying. I sat back down, staring at him. I clenched my fists.

I hated myself. More than anything.

I stared down at my fists. I blacked out. I got caught in Tsukuyomi. Xen had to take over. Xen took care of Itachi. I still don't know what he did, because Xen refuses to tell me. I clenched my jaw. I leaned down on my knees, careful of the bandages.

Whatever happened, Xen used my body to fight Itachi. I didn't die.

But I don't know what happened.

"Ryuu-san?"

I turned my head. The two nurses who so carelessly allowed Sasuke to walk out of the hospital stood by the door. Glaring at them, I stood up.

I watched as they looked away from me, uncomfortable with my glare. I widened my sensors, keeping Sasuke's chakra signature near me. I closed the door behind me and faced the two nurses.

"What."

The nurses shifted under my glare. One of them finally spoke, cautious.

"The other patient has awakened. We've come to tell you as you asked."

Sure enough, I felt her chakra signature fluctuating, denoting her distress. Continuing to glare at them, I quickly walked past them. As I got closer to my destination, I stopped.

I stared at the door before opening it.

Stepping inside, I slid the door closed. I looked up and met gray haggard eyes. She was frowning. I knew she was going to be upset.

"Minori."

One of the four (five including Obito) Uchiha studied me under unreadable eyes. I now understood why she was Itachi's lover. She certainly knew how to mask her emotions.

I walked to her side and pulled up a chair. I checked once more on Sasuke; still asleep. Turning my full attention to Minori, I looked her straight in the eye.

"Do you hate me for saving you?"

Minori frowned then, her lips turning at the side. She sighed slowly, softly, as she ran a hand through her hair. When her fingers touched the bandaged shoulder, she stiffened. Her gaze broke from mine and stared at the wound.

The wound Itachi gave her.

There was a moment of silence. When it was clear that she wasn't going to say anything to me, I cleared my throat. When our eyes met once more, I breathed out softly.

"You can hate me all you want," I began softly, scooting closer, "but we need to discuss the future."

"The future?"

She sounded surprised. As if she wasn't expecting a future. Well, she wasn't supposed to be in the future at all. I wasn't sure rather to hate Haru right now or love him. Actually, I hate him. Right now. Especially with what I know.

"Yes, the future."

Minori, studying me, finally nodded. Before I could began, she stopped me by reaching out to touch the bandage peaking from my neck. I stiffened under her cool touch. Her eyes continued holding mine in her gaze.

"Was this from Itachi?"

I nodded curtly.

I studied her as she studied my wound. She was pretty, I have to give Itachi that. No, she was beautiful. Even as ashen white as she was and as weak as she looked. Her raven hair and her gray eyes. She was beautiful, inside and out. It was no wonder she caught Itachi's attention. Her hand moved back to her side as she leaned back onto the hospital bed.

"I don't hate you, Ryuu-kun."

I blinked. I blinked once more, trying to understand her words. I shifted in my seat, turning my body fully to her.

"I know."

As she settled down, I could only tell her this in one way. I spent the whole night, since finding out, going back and forth on how I would tell her. There was a lot to tell her.

That I knew about Itachi's secret (but I'm not sure if she did). That we had to keep it from Sasuke. That she was now our legal guardian at sixteen years old and the legal holder of all the Uchiha fortune (which was a lot of money). And that we had a funeral to run.

A funeral without bodies. I inwardly sighed. There was a lot to explain. But the most important one had to come first. It was the one I struggled most with.

Slowly, I said the words I've been dreading all night long. I waited.

There was a moment of silence. A moment of shock. A moment of denial. And finally she began to cry. It was the soft kind, the silent kind. The heart breaking kind.

I reached forward and she clasped onto my hand before I could reach her. Her tears fell onto my skin and it was then, that if Haru had walked in, I would have punched him.

…

* * *

><p><em>Five Years Later<em>

* * *

><p><strong>Kinnara<strong>

I looked up from my seat on the sand. Chiyo was sitting next to me, Ebizo taking a light nap as he behind Chiyo and I on the sand island. It's been four years since I've been back to Suna. Chiyo and Ebizo, when they found me capable, decided that I needed to travel to learn about all the different herbs and medicine, especially since Chiyo needed to restock because most of them do not grow naturally in Suna.

As soon as the walls of Suna appeared, I jumped.

"We're back!"

Ebizo snapped out of his nap, looking around. Chiyo sighed at me.

"Stop rocking the island. Sit down, Kinnara."

I pouted, but obeyed her. I was really excited. I was going to be reunited with Gaara! I quickly dug into my satchel and took out my journal. I stared at it. It was plain looking, nothing special, but it's exactly what I wanted.

Yashamaru knew this. He gave me the journal when I left as a parting gift. I shifted the giant gourd on my back, another parting gift. It was from the Kazekage. Right before I left, Gaara and I received these. They were exactly the same, except my sash was white instead of red.

I opened the journal to the new page and began writing.

Chiyo, from the corner of my eyes, peaked over my shoulder. When she saw what I was writing, I grinned as she just scoffed.

"You and you're gibberish code. I am sure nothing you write is important."

She huffed and looked straight ahead.

Shukaku laughed.

_**If only she knew.**_

I silently agreed with him. I looked down at my journal and quickly flipped the pages. It was filled with English, the strange gibberish that Chiyo was talking about. It was a pretty smart idea, in my opinion.

Slowly, I began with the same two words I started all of my journal entries: _Dear Xen. _

...

**Konoha**

Ryuu walked beside Sasuke, the two of them silent with the morning sun just rising. Sasuke was marked up, bandages on his cheeks. Ryuu wore scratches on his face, but he was going to heal them as soon as he got home.

It was too early, but the two didn't care. It's become a routine now in the five years, that after their morning training, they'll walk together to the academy entrance. Stopping by the gate, Sasuke turned to Ryuu, hands in his pocket.

"I'll see you later."

"Yea, I might be late today," Ryuu replied as he also slipped his hands into his pocket.

Sasuke nodded. "Hn."

Ryuu, at his 'Hn' smirked. Sasuke cocked an eyebrow at the smirk. Ryuu shrugged.

"Nothing. Have fun. Be nice to Naruto. He's coming over for dinner tonight, don't forget. I don't need a fight."

Sasuke grunted. "Fine, I'll tolerate the dobe today."

Ryuu scoffed. "You're secretly in love with him."

Sasuke glared at him, obviously not amused. Ryuu's hands slipped out from his pocket and he raised them up as an olive branch.

"Okay, okay."

Sasuke finally sighed then nodded towards the direction of their home. "Go home. You promised you'll return early."

Ryuu grinned then, scratching his head. "I did, didn't I?"

Sasuke grinned. "Whipped."

This time Ryuu cocked an eyebrow at him. "Says you."

Sasuke's grin fell as a slight flush covered his cheeks. "Get out of here. Sakura and Ino have been getting here early since they found out from the dobe that we both come here early."

Nothing else needed to be said. Sasuke smirked again at the disappearing figure of Ryuu. The talk of fan girls always scared him off. Ryuu ran all the way home, jumping from roof. He hated interacting with the citizens. They were too nice, eyes filled with pity. He grimaced.

But as soon as he made it back to their private home, located in the more spacious area without apartments, he stopped running. He followed the long paths and passed the homes of the farmer citizens. The farmers lived more alongside the wall where there was room to farm. It wasn't much because most farmers were just non-shinobi citizens who fed themselves and worked for local stores.

Ryuu rather enjoyed this atmosphere. It was quiet compared to the center of the Konoha. He stopped outside of their place.

He looked up from the gate as a small figure appeared on the front porch.

"Ryuu-nii!"

Suddenly, the small figure ran inside.

Ryuu closed the gates behind him. He knew that the five-year old's calling of his name had already brought awareness of his return. As he slipped off his shoes and entered the front door, he paused.

Warm gray eyes met his. The child stood next to her. The older woman, twenty-one now, smiled softly at Ryuu before looking down at the child as she smooth one hand over the raven hair of the five year old by her side.

She turned back to him.

"Okaeri, Ryuu-kun."

"Tadaima, Minori-chan."

**[And so we skip to the future]**

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><p><strong>~TBC~<strong>

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><p><em>AN: So...you hate me? Please review. I have no name for the kid yet. I'll think of one, sooner or later. It won't be Salad (Jk, idk why everyone is so angry at Sarada's name. it's a cool name. Look it up!)  
><em>

_But seriously. Don't hate me. The idea came to me and it just wouldn't leave. Plus, it's a part of the story and the idea of consequences. You'll understand next chapter._

_**P.S. If it feels rushed, that's because it was. The missing pieces will appear as the story progresses. Don't worry. But if you want something specifically included or explained, please review. I'll try my best to accommodate. **_

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><p><em>Thanks for reading though and tell me what you think. Hope everyone is good.<em>


	16. Accept

**"All we can do is live as we endure loss..." - Yomo**

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><p><em><strong>16 - Accept<strong>_

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><p><em><strong>Summary of 16: <strong>_From Konoha to Suna to Konoha to Takama-ga-hara

_Konoha: Ryuu and Minori are fixing the roof with Minori reflecting upon the last five years and her daughter's influence in their lives. Sasuke is at the academy as he is remembering the time Minori gave birth and what he had done. He also reflects about his friendship with Ryuu's friends. _

_Suna: Kinnara, Chiyo, and Ebizo returns, with everyone waiting for her. Gaara and Kinnara finally have a reunion and alone time as Kinnara visits Karura's tomb and the two realize how much each has grown. _

_Konoha: Ryuu is awakened by a nightmare._

_Takama-ga-hara: Xen, inner mind and subconscious of Ryuu, hates lying. _

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><p><span><strong>Konoha<strong>

Minori turned back to Ryuu before catching sight of something behind him. She couldn't help but cover her mouth as she laughed softly.

Ryuu turned towards what she was laughing at. His eyes narrowed at the Hokage Monument. There was an obvious orange blur over the great monuments. And paint. Lots and lots of paint.

The Uchiha frowned even as the older woman continued laughing.

"He's missing class again," Minori whispered as she leaned against the ladder, their eyes meeting when Ryuu looked back at her. "And I'm sure they'll ask you to catch him."

When it was realized that Uchiha Ryuu could catch Naruto, when no other shinobi or ANBU could, it quickly became a norm that whenever Naruto acted up, one would travel to the outskirts of Konoha to grab the youngest jounin in all of Konoha to help catch the boy. In fact, Ryuu was surprised that they've yet to call him.

Ryuu's frown disappeared before he looked away and continued hammering. A smile flickered on his lips.

"I'm sure they will catch him today without me," Ryuu replied with a soft laugh.

She opened her mouth to reply when the ladder stirred. She looked down.

"Rei, did you want something from Ryuu," Minori called down when the five year old girl looked up at her with dark onyx eyes, flecks of Minori's own gray blinked back at her.

"Can Rei help too," Rei asked politely, her voice soft.

Minori turned to Ryuu. He smiled, eyes twinkling as he crawled to the side to peek down at Rei.

"You want to help me, Rei-chan?"

Rei's eyes crinkled at the side, her smile appearing with a sudden grace that left Minori's chest hurting. Minori felt her hands trembled when the quiet little girl nodded shyly. Minori made her way down. She laid a chaste kiss on Rei's hair before the little girl began climbing up the ladder. Minori, watching her daughter, felt as her smile softened as Rei continued smiling as she reached the top.

Rei had Itachi's smile.

Her daughter had his temperament too and even his taste in food. Ryuu always made sure to separate Sasuke's omusubi with okaka and tomatoes from Rei's cabbage and onigiri with seaweed in it. Minori never had problems with distinguishing the two, having spent years preparing Itachi's favorite meal.

Even so, when Ryuu mixed the two, Rei never complained and in return, Sasuke didn't either. Rei was a good influence on Sasuke. Over the years, Itachi's younger brother had changed dramatically from the boy he was before **_and_ **after the massacre. Yet Minori couldn't just say that Sasuke's change came from Rei's birth and the massacre, but also Ryuu's subtle guidance.

Minori, looking at their home of five years, was glad that she trusted Ryuu all those years ago to find them a home after Itachi had burned the compound down and with it, the bodies of every Uchiha. Amaterasu had destroyed everything except for some founding structures like roofs and walls.

When Ryuu offered to be in charge of finding a home, she'd relented. She had her doubts though. Especially when they first saw it...

_Sasuke stared at the home, eyes frowning. "What is this?"_

_"Our new home," Ryuu replied softly as he opened the gates and walked in first. _

_Minori looked down at Sasuke. The younger boy stared at the house. She softly whispered his name. Sasuke turned to her, eyes unreadable. He turned to Ryuu._

_"Why are we not rebuilding the compound?"_

_Ryuu looked at the house. "Why would we rebuild that place?"_

_Sasuke frowned. "Because it's our home."_

_"This is home now," Ryuu whispered. _

_When Sasuke opened his mouth to object, Ryuu turned back to them and Sasuke fell silent at the sadness in Ryuu's eyes. Minori's heart clenched. She wrapped her hand around Sasuke's shoulder, the younger boy stiffening before relaxing into her side. _

_Ryuu looked back at the house._

_"This is a new beginning for us," he whispered. "We need somewhere better to raise the baby. Somewhere without the memories."_

_Minori felt as Sasuke stiffened. She looked down at him and noticed the way he bowed his head, hair covering his eyes..._

...Minori sighed as she turned away and headed into their home. The hammering caused the house to shake, Minori quickly catching a cup before it fell. She looked up and coughed slightly as dust fell.

The house has been renovated much since Ryuu bought it with a small share of his inheritance that's been allowed to him. During those first months, it had been the most difficult for the three of them. Adjusting to the new home that had only one bedroom and a single kitchen without running water had not been the worst of it though.

It had been Sasuke's adjustment that made things hard.

The boy, after they were released from the hospital, wanted to be left alone and had thrown tantrums and ran away often. The first time he ran away, Ryuu had dragged the boy back unconscious...

_...Minori clenched her hands over her apron, eyes creased in worry as Ryuu dropped Sasuke onto his mattress in the corner of their small living room. _

_"Where did he go?"_

_Ryuu knelt besides Sasuke, fixing the blanket around the boy. He replied without looking up._

_"The compound."_

_"What was he doing there," Minori asked when Ryuu only became silent._

_Ryuu turned his head slightly. "He was digging through the wreckage."_

_She frowned. "What was he looking for?"_

_Ryuu stiffened, head lowering as he became silent. Minori unclenched her fingers, about to go to him when he spoke again._

_"I'm going to seal the compound," he whispered softly. "I'll talk to the Sandaime and get someone to begin tomorrow. Please, watch him tonight."_

_Without waiting for her reply, Ryuu stood up and was gone..._

...Sure enough, the next few days, the compound was sealed off, the Hokage personally seeing to it himself. In return, Sasuke began acting up even more, purposely skipping school and continuing to run away and even refusing to eat.

Ryuu would have none of it.

When Sasuke wasn't in school or training, he was followed day and night by Ryuu. When Sasuke refused to eat, Ryuu would also refuse to eat until Sasuke finally relented and after a while, Sasuke stopped trying that tactic.

When questioned, Ryuu simply said that Sasuke was too young and traumatized to be left alone which left Minori questioning about Ryuu's own state of mind. But between the two, Ryuu did have a stronger head and that stability affected Sasuke's sanity greatly during those months after the massacre and before Rei's birth.

As angry as Sasuke was at Ryuu and no matter how hurt he was at the massacre and Itachi, Minori knew how much Ryuu's presence calmed Sasuke's own. It helped that Ryuu and Sasuke were best friends even before the massacre, so despite Sasuke's new attitude and distrust to everyone, there was just something about Ryuu that Sasuke couldn't stop trusting.

Her presence though, Sasuke had ignored. During those months after the massacre, he only acknowledged her when he thanked her for packing his lunch or only reacting to her with grunts or shrugs. Their relationship has dramatically changed and become better, but Minori could still remember the cold indifference.

It changed after Rei's birth. _Only_ after her birth.

Minori closed her eyes, remembering when she first told Sasuke about her pregnancy...

_"A baby?"_

_Sasuke froze, his chopsticks numbly falling from his fingers and into his bowl of udon. He blinked at her, mouth opening and closing. It's been only a few days since the massacre. __Ryuu had been taking Sasuke to have meals with Minori, exclaiming that the two needed to get to know each other. Today, Ryuu was visiting Haru, having been released first from the hospital._

_ "Hai," Minori whispered as she laid her own chopsticks aside. "I'm going to have a baby, Sasuke-kun."_

_Sasuke swallowed the lump in his throat and stared at her stomach. He didn't know much about pregnancy, but he's seen pregnant women before. He looked back at her, eyes unreadable._

_ "Who is the father?"_

_Minori closed her eyes. She shook her head and instead, reopened her eyes and stared down. Gingerly, she cupped her cup of tea._

_"It doesn't matter," she whispered sadly. "He's gone."_

_She turned to Sasuke and met his eyes. _

_"It's just us now, Sasuke-kun. Just us." _

...and it was just them at first. Just Sasuke, Ryuu, and Minori.

Minori wiped her hands as she paused when the hammering stop. There was shuffling on the roof as Rei moved about to grab more nails and tiles for Ryuu. She heard Ryuu's soft laughter followed by Rei's soft giggle.

Rei.

Her daughter. Sasuke's niece.

Itachi's daughter.

It was a dysfunctional family. Before Rei and a little less so after Rei. But before Rei, the three of them, the only three left of the Uchiha in Konoha, walked on broken glass around each other.

Sasuke had always been angry and inwardly planning revenge and harvesting his hatred and grief. Sasuke kept to himself, but couldn't quite do that either because Ryuu constantly bothered him. Ryuu had shouldered the burden of watching over Sasuke and her. When he wasn't doing that or training, he was working for Konoha.

Minori herself could no longer be on duty due to her pregnancy. Even after Rei's birth, she still remained inactive due to her wound. The doctors said it would be years before she could continue her kunoichi duties. For the past five years, she has been unable to perform even the simplest of ninjutsu without causing pain in her shoulders, the tendons and muscles so torn up from what Itachi did that the doctors said they will never heal properly.

If she was lucky, her wound will allow for mediocre taijutsu.

Soon, she will get the final results of the physical therapy she has been undergoing for the past five years. It was as if her wound had been healing alongside the aging of her daughter. Rei was getting older. They needed the money.

Minori refused to touch the Uchiha fortune. It belonged to Ryuu and Sasuke alone. The two were sons of the Uchiha clan head and an Uchiha elder. It belonged to them...and to Rei, the only child of the Uchiha heir, even if he was a missing nin now.

Minori rubbed her eyes with wary fingers.

Money, Sasuke's grief, and Ryuu's distractions, and her own inability to do anything due to her handicapp and pregnant state...had been their biggest problem after the Uchiha clan was massacred. That had been them. The remaining Uchihas. Left to pick up the dead.

Their lives after the massacre became a waiting game. It was like they were holding their breaths until the baby was born; Ryuu happy, Minori nervous, and Sasuke indifferent.

Then Rei was finally here. Her daughter had been born earlier than expected and maybe not at the best time, but she was finally here.

Rei, her beautiful and gentle daughter. The light that made Ryuu laugh more and the reason why Sasuke returned home with a smile.

Minori looked over at their "family" photo. Sasuke and Ryuu both stood next to each other with small smiles on their faces. Minori sat in front of the two, her arms holding Rei. Her daughter had been three months shy of her first birthday, large onyx eyes staring and giggling at the camera as Haru made faces to her. In the back stood their newly refurbished home.

Minori traced the picture before setting it away from the edge so it wouldn't fall.

Rei had been a premature birth. Ryuu, with Sasuke and Yuhi Kurenai at his side, had delivered Rei.

Minori turned, hands blocking the sunlight, as she caught sight of Ryuu. The twelve year old boy was saying something to Rei, her daughter smiling shyly at him. To think so much had changed within five years.

Five years ago, she along with Sasuke, Ryuu, and Itachi, were the last remaining Uchiha. At sixteen…Minori had been left in charge of a clan that no longer could be called a clan. At sixteen, the lover she could never reveal had become a traitor.

The father of her unexpected child.

Her daughter would never know her father and in a way, Minori did not want Rei to know Itachi. Even to this day, Minori could not understand what happened that night. Ryuu has been tight lipped. Sasuke had his theory that made no sense to Minori. Itachi...was a pacifist. He desired no power. In fact, Minori saw Itachi in Rei.

Rei was so much like Itachi that it hurt just to look at her. Physically, she took after Minori's side except that Rei had her father's smile and the signature Uchiha onyx eyes. At certain angles, Minori even saw Mikoto in Rei.

Everything else though, Rei took after her father's side. Her personality was that of Itachi, silent and calm, yet she was like how Sasuke once was: bright and vibrant. She was curious, intelligent, and very observing. Sometimes, Minori coudn't help but wonder what life would have been like if the massacre never happened. She wondered...how it would have been like to have Itachi with her raising Rei. For every firsts; the first cries, the first steps, the first words, and even the first smiles and laughter.

Minori closed her eyes, breathing out softly. She wondered if Itachi—

"Okaa-saa," Rei whispered over the edge of the roof, her voice breaking through her mother's thoughts

Minori blinked before returning her attention to Rei. "Hai?"

It was Ryuu who answered her, "Minori-chan, can you grab us more nails from the shed?"

Minori nodded absently before locking up all of her thoughts away. She quickly made her way back inside, heading for their tool shed in the front.

::::

Sasuke stared out the window, eyes apathetic to the learning and demeanor giving off an even greater indifference to Iruka-sensei's lecture on chakra control. Rei's birthday passed only a month ago and Sasuke still couldn't quite throw off the emotions of guilt he felt every year.

He closed his eyes, remembering that night...

_"Sit down, Sasuke," Ryuu whispered as he continued eating._

_Sasuke glared at him, fists clenched. "Why!? How can you act so calm?! Everyone looks at us with pity, our clan is gone and our home destroyed! And you want to act like nothing is wrong?!" _

_Ryuu looked up, eyes unreadable with a harden glint in them. Sasuke saw as Minori paused at the doorway, hand unconsciously moving to cover her bulging stomach. __She'd left for the bathroom earlier. _

_Sasuke hadn't wanted her to intrude upon this, but simply chose to ignore her. He didn't care about her. She was no one, she—_

_"Sasuke, I understand why you are upset," Minori began, but her words only made him angrier._

_Sasuke only turned to her with pained eyes. "Then why haven't the two of you done anything?!"_

_"Minori-chan is pregnant," Ryuu cut in coldly, suddenly setting aside his chopsticks. "She can't do anything."_

_"And you?! I've heard everyone talking! That you and Minori only survived because you held him off! Was your cousin's lover worth our clan when you could have stopped him?!"_

_Sasuke heard a sharp intake of breath and glanced briefly to see Minori's shocked face, her hand covering her mouth. Ryuu also glanced at her before turning to Sasuke with a frown. _

_"Where did you hear this," he asked with a hint of anger. _

_"It doesn't matter," Sasuke shouted, hands shaking as he glanced between the two of them with frustration. "Itachi killed our parents! He killed Shisui and our clan! But the two of you just stay here, playing house!"_

_Sasuke suddenly looked down at his hands, staring at them as if they didn't belong to him. Itachi's words came back to him. _

_He needed power. _

_He didn't need them. _

_"I don't need either of you. I'll kill him myself. I'll revive our clan. I'll—"_

_"Sasuke," Ryuu whispered with deceptive calmness as he stood up, "you will stop this nonsense."_

_Minori quickly stepped in. __She laid a comforting hand on Sasuke's shoulder, but he tried to shrug her off. Her hands though, tightened on him and she forced him to look at her as she knelt. He noticed how she orientated her stomach with great care. _

_He met her eyes._

_But then she touched his cheek and he tried to look away from her. _

_"Sasuke, you don't mean that. Revenge will solve nothing. Killing Itachi won't bring you peace," she began, but Sasuke saw red at the name of that man on her lips._

_"You don't know anything about me or Itachi," he seethed, voice hard and almost cruel in his grief and pain, "I will avenge the Uchiha. He deserves to die. He killed our parents, destroyed our clan and our home—"_

_"No, Sasuke-kun," Minori whispered, softly, her eyes filled with too much understanding, "You would never be happy if you killed Itachi. This isn't what Itachi or your parents would have wanted you to become. They loved you very—"_

_ "My parents are dead! That man killed him! He hates me and he's a monster!"_

_Minori's heart clenched. Shaken, she shook her head and tried to reason with him again._

_"Sasuke, you don't meant that. Itachi loves you. You love him," she whispered sadly, hands calming. "You still do. Revenge will only destroy the both of you, Sasuke-kun."_

_The kindness in her eyes, as if she actually understood, finally snapped him. With hard eyes and without thinking, the words left his mouth just as he shoved her away from him._

_"Shut up! Shut up, shut up! You don't know me! I hate him, I hate him, I HATE HIM!"_

_But as he shoved her away, he forgot where they were standing. He forgot that Ryuu had yet rebuilt the stairs leading from the bathroom to the kitchen. He forgot that Minori was no longer an abled kunoichi. _

_That she was pregnant._

_So when she was suddenly was falling, the world stopped for Sasuke. Everything went cold and time seem to just stop. He stiffened, heart pounding. He reached for her and heard as Ryuu moved, but it was too late. _

_Sasuke felt as if he was watching his parents' death once more. _

_But this time, the one holding the knife with blood on his hands was not Itachi. _

_It was **him**…_

_…Sasuke stood by the doorway, unsure of what to do. Ryuu finally stopped the healing glow, his fingers splayed across Minori's abdomen. Kurenai looked up from her position from between Minori's legs. _

_Sasuke knew that despite the jounin's lack of knowledge in childbirth, she'd promised to help since she was the only adult female that Ryuu could trust around Minori. Sasuke trusted her too. _

_She shared a glance with Ryuu. Ryuu nodded. He turned to Minori, eyes solemn. Minori panted as she shook her head at his look._

_"Minori," Ryuu whispered softly, defeated and solemn. _

_The young woman shook her head in denial, crying. _

_"It's too early," she breathed out brokenly, sweat and tears falling from her face. "I'm not ready for this, Ryuu. Please, the baby…just a few more months. I can keep her safe inside of me. I-I," Minori gasped, eyes closing as another spasm of contraction hit her. _

_Ryuu clenched his teeth. He suddenly stood up and turned to Sasuke. Sasuke met Ryuu's cold eyes with a flinch. Suddenly, he was being dragged away and then slammed into the wall in the hallway. _

_Sasuke numbly let his arms fall to his side. He stared at Ryuu with guilt ridden eyes. _

_"I know what Itachi told you," Ryuu whispered, breathe harsh and eyes like stone. _

_Sasuke's eyes widened in shock. Before he could ask, Ryuu coldly silenced him with his eyes. _

_"But listen to me now. Minori needs us. That baby needs us, Sasuke. We are the only ones who can protect them."_

_ "Ryuu-nii—"_

_"Don't let Itachi turn you against us," Ryuu whispered softly, eyes meeting Sasuke's. "Please, Sasuke. They need you. Not me, **you**."_

_Slowly, Ryuu let him go and disappeared back into the room when Minori whimpered. Sasuke ran a trembling hand over his face. He returned to the door and froze. _

_Kurenai had moved aside, unable to do anymore due to her inexperience with how to deliver a baby. Ryuu, with Kurenai behind him, was now taking over the birth. Minori moaned as the contraction hit her, her pale ashen face sweating. _

_Sasuke stared at the scene, eyes widening. He saw and smelled the blood, vomit chocking to come out. Ryuu's words calmed him a little though._

_"Breath. The baby is almost here," the other boy said soothingly. _

_But that soothing tone disappeared as Ryuu quickly barked orders that Sasuke couldn't comprehend to Kurenai. The kunoichi obediently listened and followed. Sasuke, when Minori cried out in pain, was instantly by her side. _

_Slowly, he took her hands in his. Minori at his touch, opened her haggard eyes. She smiled at him, weak and strained, but Sasuke felt as his heart faltered at the smile._

_He was the reason she was like this. Yet she was still trying to comfort him. __She tried to speak to him, but her voice was dry. Instead she grimaced and clutched at his finger, carefully of hurting him even now. _

_Sasuke swallowed the lump in his throat and sat next to her. _

_When Ryuu announced that the baby was ready and for Minori to push, Kurenai took over, Ryuu standing beside her. Minori, at that minute, shook her head._

_"No," she breathed out, voice shaking._

_Everyone turned to her, Ryuu's eyes furrowing as he spoke as calmly as he could,"Minori, now is not the time—"_

_"She won't be safe," Minori sobbed, head shaking weakly. "She won't have her father and I'm not ready to be a mother. I can't protect her! She's safer inside me! Please, keep her inside me!" Her whole body trembled with pain and fear as she gasped for air, hands clutching tightly in Sasuke's. "H-he doesn't even know! He," Minori's eyes squeezed shut as she shook her head, "h-he doesn't know...I-I ca-can't—! Please, I can't do this alone, I__—__"_

_She was sobbing gibberish now, her fear overtaking her. _

_Ryuu clenched his teeth, hands quickly laying over Minori's stomach. Sasuke was unsure of what was happening, but he knew from Ryuu's face that it wasn't good. At the other boy's next words, Sasuke froze. _

_"Minori! You have to calm down," Ryuu bit out as he began pouring his chakra into her, "Your distress is affecting the baby! You have to calm dow—Minori!"_

_Minori only continued to sob, holding onto Sasuke's hand like a lifeline. After a few seconds, Ryuu snapped to Kurenai when it was obvious that his chakra was not enough. _

_"Kurenai!"_

_The kunoichi quickly came to the other side and quickly the two concentrated on the child, trying to calm the baby even as Minori continued to cry. Sasuke was frozen. He felt helpless. _

_He caused this._

_He did this. _

_Sasuke panicked and snapped out of his comatose state. He stared at Ryuu then turned to Minori. Slowly, Sasuke clasped both of his hands on hers. _

_"Minori-chan," Sasuke whispered as he swallowed the lump in his throat. "I'll get stronger and help you protect the baby. Please, trust Ryuu-nii and I. Y-you have to calm down—"_

_Her sobs cut him off. She shook her head, fighting the birth still with clenched teeth. She muttered over and over again about her baby being in danger, that **he** wouldn't be there. _

_Sasuke clenched his hands over hers. Tears pricked at the corner of his eyes. _

_Minori didn't deserve this. _

_"I'm s-sorry," the broken words stuttered from his lips as the tears finally broke free._

_He clenched his eyes shut, tears pouring from them as she finally screamed, Ryuu and Kurenai both frantically trying to help her. Sasuke fought the emotional lump in his throat. He finally choked out the words he wanted to say, words that held more truth to them than the lies his whole life had become. _

_"Please, don't cry anymore, Minori-chan. I'll protect you from now on. You and the baby."_

_It was as if someone switched a light in her. _

_Minori at his words, opened her eyes. She was no longer crying and instead, she was looking at him in a way she has never looked at him before. Sasuke from the way her tear ridden eyes stared at him in relief and pain, knew that it wasn't him that she was suddenly seeing. _

_No, she was seeing someone else. _

_He saw as she finally stopped fighting. _

_Elation overcame him and he smiled through the tears. He leaned down when she opened her lips, the sobs stopping so she could talk. _

_Softly, with eyes shining with something Sasuke couldn't and still don't understand, she whispered one name. She whispered—_

"Teme!"

Naruto's obnoxious voice cut through his thoughts. Sasuke had hoped the boy would be gone today as he was missing for the first half, obviously causing trouble because he was dumped back into class by Iruka later in the day.

Jaws clenched, Sasuke snapped his head towards Naruto. The boy was grinning foxily at him, holding up his identical bento box to Sasuke's face. Sasuke still didn't understand why Ryuu was so nice to Naruto.

"Lunch time! Come on, Haru is bringing Hinata-chan her lunch today too! Let's go, dattebayo!"

Sighing, Sasuke got up, grabbing his own bento from his desk and quietly followed the dobe. Better to just go along with it then create a scene. Especially since their Final Exam was tomorrow and Sasuke would rather spend today with as less noise as possible.

As he walked alongside Naruto, ignoring the fangirls trailing after him, Sasuke thought back to everything.

Sasuke never meant to hurt Minori. He was just so frustrated, so hurt. But as he stared at her, her sobbing and fear chocking him in their despair, he finally understood what Ryuu meant when he said Minori needed him.

She needed **him**, Sasuke, and not Ryuu despite everything Ryuu has done for them. For once in his life, Sasuke was the one that someone needed.

Sasuke wasn't sure why, but ever since the massacre, Minori was constantly worrying about him and fretting over him. She'd only responded to his indifference and cruel apathy with smiles and gentle words of understanding. At first, he just thought it was because Minori viewed him as a kid. Just like his father.

Just like Itachi, and even Ryuu.

Sasuke sighed. Up to Rei's birth, he'd ignored her and spurned her. But as he thought back to everything, he realized Minori had never just seen him as a kid.

It was him, not Ryuu, that she had come to when the baby first kicked. It was him that she constantly referred to when she talked to the baby in her stomach. It was him, Uchiha Sasuke, who Minori came to for help in decorating the nursery, in deciding what meals they would eat, and even in the healers she should trust her pregnancy with.

Even when Rei was born, Minori had taken his name for her daughter. Rei, because the new Uchiha's cry sounded like that of a bell, so light and barely audible, but it soothed Sasuke. To be reminded that the Uchiha was not gone. That in a way, he still had a family.

Sasuke stopped when Naruto stopped. He looked up and sure enough, walking towards them was Hyuuga Haru and next to him was Hinata. The younger Hyuuga blushed a bright scarlet as Naruto called out her name. Sasuke rolled his eyes as he nodded at them while Naruto waved enthusiastically.

To this day, the Uchiha was unsure of what frustrated him most, the fact that the usually calm Hyuuga turned into a bumbling stuttering mess in front of the dobe or that the dobe, even now, was still so oblivious to the former's feelings for him. He met Haru's eyes and saw that the Hyuuga heir had noticed his sister's blush. Haru though, only laughed before focusing on Naruto.

"Naruto, I saw that you skipped class this morning," the older boy replied loudly. "I thought I told you to tell me when you plan these things, I want to help too."

Sasuke deadpanned. The next Hyuuga clan head indeed. He fought to urge to cover his eyes and curse so instead he focused on Hinata.

"Hinata," he breathed out roughly, eyes scanning her face briefly before looking aside.

The younger Hyuuga bowed her head slightly to Sasuke. "S-Sasuke-kun."

Sasuke stiffened when he felt demonic aura behind him and he saw his fangirls glaring at Hinata. That only made the poor girl flush harder and hide behind her brother which only made Naruto, the oblivous dobe, turn to her and ask her what was wrong. This only made Hinata blush harder and she tried to answer, but no words came out.

Haru, noticing what had happened, cocked an eyebrow at Sasuke, before patting Hinata on the head. Sasuke sighed as he knew what would happen next. It always happened this way. He ignored Haru as the sixteen year old strolled right past him, leaving Hinata with Naruto who continued asking her what was wrong.

Sasuke couldn't help, but turn around slightly to watch what was happening. He deadpanned once more when he saw what was happening.

Haru had on the most charming smile, his eyes closed as he laughed with Sasuke's fangirls. Ino and Sakura were there, the two obviously blushing under the attention of the teen shinobi. The other girls had hearts in their eyes. Sasuke scowled when Haru pointed over at him.

But the girls ignored where he was pointing and continued watching him. Haru, Sasuke rolled his eyes once more, rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. Sasuke turned back to the other two, hoping for the situation to be better. He almost sighed in relief when it was.

Hinata, still blushing, was finally speaking in complete sentences to Naruto.

"Iie, I'm okay Naruto-kun," she whispered as Naruto scowled.

"Then why did you hide behind Haru? Did Sasuke-teme scare you again?"

A vein popped as Sasuke clenched his jaw.

"I've never scared her, dobe." Just his fangirls.

Before Naruto could reply, Haru returned. With a smile, Hinata turned to him as Naruto scratched his head in confusion.

"Ne, Haru, where did you go dattebayo?"

"Oh, just to handle some business," he replied with a cheerful expression.

Sasuke shook his head before walking away. He didn't have time for this. "I'm hungry."

"Teme!" Naruto was soon by his side, yelling at him about being rude.

Sasuke grunted and soon Naruto's voice was combined with Haru as the older boy commented about how unappreciative Sasuke was with a playful tone. Sasuke didn't need to look to know Hinata was next to Haru. Sasuke, ignoring them, simply thought how strange it was that these were the ones Ryuu considered his closest friends. Even Hinata was in the "in-group" of Ryuu.

Sasuke studied Haru at the corner of his eyes though.

Haru and Ryuu have only grown closer these last years. Sasuke couldn't even bring himself to be jealous because...well...it's Haru.

Hyuuga Haru was the most genuine person Sasuke has ever met. Just being around him gave one the feeling of warmth, as if one was in the presence of the sun. But it didn't hurt. It didn't burn. It just lit your world.

In a way, Sasuke could understand why Ryuu along with everyone else gravitated around Haru.

The Hyuuga heir was truly the rising sun of Konoha.

* * *

><p>…<p>

* * *

><p><span><strong>Suna<strong>

Gaara looked out from where he floated in the air, studying the sand dunes beyond Suna's wall. He closed his eyes and continued meditating. Within the folds of his clothes, he could feel Kinnara's letters.

He missed his twin. It's been four years since they've seen each other. He reopened his eyes, the nonchalant expression replaced with a small hint of sadness as his lips remained unmoving.

He truly wished that he could have followed her in the steps of becoming a medical ninja. But the Kazekage had said that Gaara's talent would be wasted in that area.

Finally frowning, Gaara reclosed his eyes.

From Kinnara's last letter, she was returning soon. He steadily entered into his trance, silently seeking Shukaku's mind. Since gaining the knowledge about Shukaku from Kinnara before she left, he'd been practicing just as she taught him.

Gaara reopened his eyes when he felt his feet land on something firm.

Shukaku grinned down at him, tail slamming to one side and sending sand waves. When they threatened to crush Gaara, the sand around the young jinchuuriki rose up to protect him, creating a barrier around him.

When the sand finally settle and Shukaku cackled loudly, Gaara slowly levitated himself with a sand island until he was eye to eye with the bijuu. Despite the rude welcoming, Gaara respectfully bowed to Shukaku.

The bijuu, at the respect, grinned. "If it isn't Gaara."

"Shukaku-dono," Gaara greeted as he lifted his head. "Thank you for allowing me into your home."

Shukaku arched an eyebrow at him as he scoffed. Well, what would have been an eyebrow if he had any.

"Boy, what home? This is my prison," he mumbled before sneering, "and always so polite. But I like that about you. Unlike that bratty she-demon twin of yours."

At the mention of his twin, Gaara perked up, eyes widening.

"Shukaku-dono, have you heard from Kinnara?"

Shukaku eyed the boy. Before Kinnara left, the three of them had not been sure if they could co-exist together in Shukaku's mind. When Gaara finally was able to enter into this stasis, the three learned—much to the twins' sadness—that they couldn't.

The two then decided that sending letters would have to do and on the occasion, using Shukaku as a messenger much to the annoyance of the bijuu (you can just guess who came up with that idea). Shukaku flapped his tail back to the other side.

"She said she was close to Suna."

Gaara finally smiled, his lips turning softly at the edge. He bowed once more. "Thank you, Shukaku-dono. I will leave you in peace."

Shukaku huffed at his politeness, smirking.

"Ehh, better you than me. Tell that twin of yours to leave me alone for a while. Her company, I'd rather not have."

Gaara, at his words, couldn't help but sigh. "I am truly sorry for anything Kinnara has done to you."

Shukaku rolled his eyes.

"Leave already, boy. You're politeness is almost as bad as the she-demon's rudeness."

Gaara quickly nodded and disappeared, closing the connection. But not without another quick thank you and apology that left the Ichibi grumbling about annoying children.

::::

Temari and Kankuro ran, the older sibling throwing commands at the others.

"Where is Gaara," she shouted at one of the shinobi who flashed in front of her.

He shook his head. "Gaara-sama is nowhere to be found, Temar—"

Temari shook her head furiously, words of frustration seething from her teeth before she walked pass the messenger, Kankuro quickly following. The second oldest of the Kazekage's children frowned as he tried to keep up with Temari.

"Geez, calm down, Temari," Kankuro grumbled as he looked apologetically at one of the shinobi Temari shushed as he tried to speak to her.

The two of them had just received words about the sighting of three figures traveling towards Suna. From the description of the sand island, everyone knew who they were. The Kazekage and his family were quickly notified…except for the youngest who was nowhere to be found.

"Someone find Gaara!"

Everyone in the Kazekage office quickly scampered at the fierce command. Kankuro sighing as he ran a hand carefully over his face as to not wipe off his paint. He's just started wearing them and was still getting used to having it on his face.

Temari turned to him, eyes narrowing. "Didn't you tell me that Gaara was training with the old man today?"

"He was supposed to," Kankuro answered back as he followed her out of the building.

Temari looked straight ahead, eyes focused on the entrance to Suna. Kankuro nodded at the citizens who greeted them without smiling.

:::

The Kazekage slowly turned his gaze from the two older figures walking towards him to the smaller figure. She's grown, certainly taller than when she left. He frowned beneath his Kage mask. He felt his heart clenched painfully. He felt as Yashamaru stiffened at his side. He knew then that his brother-in-law was thinking the same thing.

Kinnara will certainly take after her mother.

The now twelve-year old girl walking towards him with a wide grin brought back memories from long ago…from a time where he first met a small girl with identical features and a soft smile. When he himself had been a small boy meeting the woman he would love till he died. The Kazekage closed his eyes briefly, trying to get rid of those images.

"Otousan! Yasha-jii!"

Blinking from his memories, the Kazekage straightened, opening his mouth to gruffly greet the three of them. However, like always in Kinnara's presence, he stiffened as she suddenly threw herself at him.

Everyone stared in shock as the small girl embraced her stiff frozen father, the great Yondaime of Suna. The only ones not shocked were the two elderly siblings who were used to the small girl's attentive behavior.

Ebizo, taking pity on the Kazekage, quickly called out to his pupil. "Kinnara-sama, it is not proper to greet the Kazekage with such familiarity in public."

Kinnara, at his words, gave her signature pout and stepped back and Chiyo quickly grabbed her away, holding the now twelve year old by her side. Yashamaru, beneath his mask, grinned.

The two elders bowed their heads to the Kazekage and Kinnara begrudgingly followed suit.

The Kazekage, snapping from his discomfort, nodded at them before focusing on Chiyo.

"Welcome back, Suna has long awaited your returns, especially with the Chunin Exams making way in Konoha."

Kinnara lips pursing, kept quiet as Chiyo's grip tightening gently before softening.

"Well, a good bath and warm food would be a better welcoming, Yondaime! These old bones don't wash themselves," Chiyo said as she cackled.

Ebizo sighed as Kinnara rolled her eyes and muttered "hypocrite" beneath her breath at Chiyo's informal words towards the Kazekage.

The Kazekage nodded before signalling the three shinobi behind him to follow the request. The three quickly disappeared at his wave. He turned back to them, eyes finally meeting Kinnara's.

The sternness softened a little at the uncertainty in her eyes.

"Welcome back, Kinnara," he whispered as he nodded curtly at her. "Your sister and brothers have been eager for your return."

It was as if he summoned them because Temari and Kankuro suddenly appeared and as soon as the older girl saw the familiar figure, she was gone in a flash. Kinnara laughed as Temari grabbed her in a death hug. Kinnara laughed even more when Temari dragged a reluctant Kankuro into the hug.

Ebizo and Chiyo smiled at the scene as they turned to the Kazekage, the Yondaime's eyes watching his children without sternness. He turned to them and nodded at them.

"We will let the children have their reunion," the Kazekage said as he turned to Yashamaru who nodded.

Yashamaru, stayed behind as the Kazekage and the two elders left first. He turned to the siblings to only feel as something tackle into his side. He laughed as his arms circled Kinnara.

"You've gotten bigger," he said with slight teasing, "Kinnara-sama."

"Are you calling me fat," she broke away from him with a glare.

Temari came over and threw an arm over her shoulder, grinning. "You have gotten chunky."

"Hey!" Kinnara touched her cheeks to which Kankuro muttered, "she looks no different."

Kinnara threw a smile at him to which he smirked. But that smirk fell off from his face at Kinnara's next words.

"Wait, when did the whole makeup phase begin, niisan?"

Temari snickered as Yashamaru sighed, looking over at where the three other adults had disappeared. He quickly stepped in before Kankuro could began his rant.

"Kinnara-sama, face paint is a sign of—"

"Maturity, strength, blah and blah," Kinnara interrupted as she peered up at her brother. "I don't think I could do it myself, but I guess you look good."

Kankuro's eyes narrowed at her, unsure if he was being made fun of or being complimented. "Thank you...?"

Kinnara only smiled in return. "Where is Gaara, anyways?"

Temari sighed and Kankuro shrugged, speaking first. "Temari and I have been looking for him since our scouts noticed your return. We thought he would be here with the old man and Yashamaru."

Kinnara's smile fell, eyes softening. "Oh."

Temari quickly grabbed her. "It's okay. We'll go find him."

As the three of them headed into Suna, they noticed a lone figure walking towards them. Kinnara blinked, her eyes widening. Temari slowly let her go and as she did, Kinnara's face broke into a wide grin.

The figure, an identical giant gourd on his back, continued walking calmly towards them, but at Kinnara's sudden run towards him, he stopped. The sand around them seemed to dance in the sunlight, sensing the rise of emotion between the two.

"Gaara!"

Her twin smiled softly, eyes gentle. "Kinnara."

He opened his arms and caught her into a tight embrace, the girl laughing out loud with pure delight as she clung to him, burrowing her head into his chest. Gaara was now officially taller than her and would probably continue to be taller. But she could careless. She squeezed him with everything she had, but this only made him laugh softly at her.

"What are you doing, Kinnara?"

"I'm trying to squeeze you," she mumbled back with her mouth being covered by his chest.

Gaara just shook his head as he returned the squeeze. The sand continued dancing around them and it took a while until Gaara could tone it down to allow his older siblings to come forward. His sand only allowed Kinnara in and even now, he was still controlling it to allow others within his radius.

Temari and Kankuro followed after, the two smiling openly when the sand toned down. The two were not surprised when Kinnara was able to bypass the sand as she's always been able to do it and ever after years of being separated, Gaara's sand still recognized her.

"Where have you been Gaara?" Kankuro asked as thumped his brother on the back. "Temari came near killing everyone who couldn't find you."

Temari sighed as she ruffled Gaara's hair. "I didn't want you to miss Kinnara's return. I know how much you've been waiting for it."

Gaara apologized softly, eyes smiling even as his lips softened. Kinnara clung to his side, her gourd knocking into his. She leaned her head on his shoulder, eyes closing. She sighed.

"I feel complete now."

Kankuro scoffed as Temari shook her head. The older girl reached for her little sister, dragging her from Gaara's side and keeping her by her side instead.

"None of that now. Let's return home and get your stuff unpacked. Yashamaru spent the whole week cleaning up for your return."

Kinnara scowled and whined, "Let me have my Gaara time, the two of you have had him for years without me."

"Yea, yea," Kankuro muttered as he pushed Kinnara and Temari ahead, arm reaching to grab Gaara. "You and your Gaara complex. You two can have tonight to catch up after training. The old man wanted Gaara and I to show Chiyo-sama and Ebizo-sama their place."

Kinnara opened her mouth to object, but at Gaara's soft smile, she stopped. Sighing in defeat, Kinnara followed as Temari dragged her away, Kankuro and Gaara heading towards the Kazekage tower.

:::_later that night_:::

**Kinnara**

I laid the flowers next to her picture. I smoothed the dust from her face before stepping away.

"Hello mama."

I studied her picture. Despite my memories of another mother, I've never thought of Karura as anything else but my mother, even if it took a while to adjust and differentiate between the memories. I leaned back, sitting on top of my sand island as I stayed leveled with her photo. Crossing my legs, I adjusted my gourd before focusing back on the grave.

"I'm sorry it's been so long," I paused as I tried to find the right words. "I've missed Sunagakure." I smiled slightly. "I even missed the sand. We traveled around the Land of Wind. We even ventured into the land of Iron on some business Chiyo had with one of their medics."

I stopped there. I sighed. "I've also started to write to Xen again."

"You have?"

I blinked, stiffening. But once I recognized the chakra signature, I relaxed. No wonder I didn't feel him. I turned slightly towards the entrance. Gaara stood idly by the side, hands crossed. I nodded then patted the area next to me. Gaara's face was expressionless, even his eyes were unreadable, but he made his way to my side. I watched as the sand seem to just move with him, helping him up to my sand island.

I smiled slightly at this. I was used to having to move the sand myself, which took chakra from me because the sand would need to be manipulated in order to help others. It took no chakra when the sand itself was helping me since well, it was an instinct for the sand. It beckoned to me without me asking.

Just like it does with Gaara.

"What is it, Kinnara?"

I shook my head, waiting for him to settle next to me before I reached over and laid my head on his shoulder. Gaara leaned into me too, even as he kept his head up. I closed my eyes, feeling his chest rise and fall with each breath, his shoulder moving with his chest.

We sat silently next to each other.

I was surprised at how calm I felt right now. I was looking forward to reuniting with Gaara for years. I missed him everyday. I felt as he spoke, his voice vibrating to his shoulders.

"Do you ever blame our birth for her death?"

I reopened my eyes. I didn't need to look at Gaara to know that his eyes would be filled with doubt and grief. We spoke a little bit during the first year of our separation through letters about Karura's death. I leaned closer into him, my arms tightening around him as I grabbed him into an embrace. An awkward one though as we still sat side by side.

"Sometimes," I admitted softly. I let it sink in before I added, "but I know she wouldn't have blamed us. So, I don't. It would hurt her."

Gaara took my words in and I felt as his body suddenly relaxed next to me.

"How are you so confident that our existence meant so much to her, Kinnara. She died so we could live."

I let him go so I could study him. Gaara turned to me as I separated from him and I froze at the emotions in his eyes. He was frowning slightly, as if confused. I pulled him so he faced me and he complied. I studied him more.

He's loss his baby fat, not all of it, but much of it. His hair was longer too than when I left. It was longer than even in the manga/anime. I reached up to touch it. He blinked at me, his frown lessening as I smoother his hair away from his face. But it stubbornly went back.

"We should get a haircut."

He looked at my hair. "Will you cut it as short as mama's?"

I shook my head. "Just a little below my shoulders. Not that short."

I knew he was waiting for me to say what I really wanted. As always, Gaara was the patient one. I sighed, hand falling to my side as I turned towards Karura's picture.

"Gaara, the love one holds for someone else never disappears. Mama loved us long before we were born and she loves us now after her death." I turned back to him. "I know that our existence meant the world to her. Do you doubt her love for us, the sand's willingness to come to our aid, even now?"

He looked away, down at his hands. I froze when I finally saw his hands. Without thinking, I reached out and grabbed his right palm. Gaara let out a soft sound of surprise as I pulled it towards me, but I ignored it. I felt shaken. I smoothed my fingers across the kanji. It was rough, as if carved into his palm.

I turned to him and met his eyes. He looked at me with confusion.

"Kinnara?"

"When did you get this?"

Gaara's face frowned at me. "Not long ago."

"Why?"

Guilt crossed his face before he looked down at his palm also. "To remind me."

I stared back down at his hand. I continued tracing it. I've seen it once before. I've come a long way of learning how to read Japanese. But I could never forget this word.

_Kokoro_. Heart.

"To remind you of what?"

I turned back to him and felt as my heart stutter at his sudden sad smile. He was still studying his palm.

"That I am not a demon...that I have a heart like everyone else. Even if mama died because of us."

I swallowed the lump in my throat. I wanted to cover my eyes. I wanted to scream because as he said this, he didn't realize what I saw then on his face. Pain. I wanted to hug him.

Instead, I held still, his palm warm in my hands. Gaara never told me himself about the bullying, but Temari and Kankuro did. Yashamaru also told me with subliminal messages. I would bet everything I have that Gaara asked him not to say anything, but my twin didn't think Temari and Kankuro would know and thus, tell me.

I never breached the subject with him though. I wanted him to turn to me. I could only imagine. Gaara, despite everything, still had a long way to go in getting people's acceptance. I did too.

The truth of our reality was that even though Shukaku has been cooperative with us, the real problem had never been Shukaku. It had always been people. Ignorant, stupid, bigoted people with their uncanny ability to deduct reasoning and separate fear from truth.

But I could care less. Gaara though...he's always cared about others.

I felt as the waves of guilt push me under. I shouldn't have left. I should have stayed to protect him and support him. But I shook my head at my thoughts. I remembered that day long ago with the other children, the ball, and the swing set. As much as I hated it, Gaara didn't need me pretending things were alright.

My fingers traced the kanji once more.

"Did you carve it in with sand?"

Gaara nodded slowly. I let go of his palm and looked down at my right palm too. It couldn't be a coincidence. I clenched my fingers. I turned to Karura's picture once more before slowly turning back to Gaara.

"Why did you never tell me about the bullying?"

Gaara stiffened, his whole body tensing up. He looked at me warily. "How do you know?"

I looked at him pointedly. "I do write to Temari and Kankuro, Gaara...and they're not blind either."

He looked away, guilty, but I reached out and poked his cheek.

"Hey, don't look like that. You did nothing wrong. I just wished you would have told me."

"I wanted to protect you," he mumbled as he rubbed where I poked.

I blinked him. "Protect me?"

"You were training, Kinnara. I didn't want to worry you."

I sighed and reached out once more to poke his cheek again. "Gaara. I love you so I am always worry about you."

This time he didn't rub his cheek and instead he studied me.

"But I wanted to protect you this time, just like you always protected me. I didn't want to worry you and I wanted to get stronger."

"Well," I began, but honestly, I couldn't counter that because he was right.

I did protect him from everything. I tried to at least. He was just turning the tables on me, but it wasn't to be cruel or avenge himself in some way. I sighed inwardly, realizing I've been setting a bad example. I slowly nodded, before taking his palm back into my hand.

"Were you upset with me when I protected you all those time ago?"

Gaara blinked at the question. "Iie. You did it because you loved me."

"And you didn't tell me about the bullying because you loved me," I whispered. He nodded slowly. I continued, "did you wish I had told the truth about Shukaku and everyone else instead of protecting you?"

I felt as Gaara stiffen once more. Slowly, he nodded.

"I wanted to protect you too, Ki-chan."

I smiled softly at the nickname. "I know. I realize that now."

I sighed before letting go of his palm.

"We need to start anew," I exclaimed as I threw my hands behind me.

Gaara frowned at me and the sudden change. "What do you mean?"

I leaned back, looking up at the sand ceiling. "I mean we should stop trying to protect each other."

"What?" Gaara quickly scrambled up, his eyes widening.

I would have laughed if he didn't have such a pained expression on his face. I straightened and pulled him back down so we were sitting across from each other again. I poked both his cheeks with both of my index fingers.

"What I meant," I whispered as he rubbed both cheeks, "is that we should stop being stupid and think that protection means keeping secrets. Instead, let's protect each other from now on by being there for each other."

I smiled at him. Gaara looked at me in confusion.

"No secrets?"

"Hai," I relaxed, shoulders falling. "I realize that I will only hurt you by keeping what hurts me from you."

Gaara sighed, eyes looking down at his hands. "I'm sorry if not telling you hurt you, Kinnara. I just—"

"Wanted to protect me," I said softly, hands covering his. "I know, Gaa."

He turned his eyes back to me, a slight frown on his lips and concern in his eyes.

"I'm sorry too. Let's not do this anymore, okay?"

He nodded slowly, lips pursing. I let go of his hands. I looked down at my right palm, before making the decision. I didn't really need to think twice. It was meant to be and in a way, I should have done this long ago. I breathed out loudly before commanding the sand to my left palm.

Gaara grabbed my hands, but I simply stopped him with one look. Slowly, he sat back down as the sand surrounded my hands. It hurt for only a while, but it was over as fast as it came. The sand truly hated hurting me, even if it at my will.

I quickly began healing the bleeding skin, Gaara frowning openly at me as he almost glared at me.

"Why would you do that?"

I closed my eyes as my chakra rushed from my palm onto the tissue, feeling it attempted to heal everything. But I pulled it back a little, only healing the interior of the wound. Slowly, when it was finished, I removed my palm and Gaara quickly took my left hand into his hands.

"Because I need a reminder too."

Gaara, at my words, looked back at me, confused. The anger was gone. Instead, some understanding crossed his face even as he became more confused at the carving on my palm.

"Why _ukeru_?"

_Ukeru_...to accept. To receive.

Slowly, I traced the kanji on my palm, my wrist still being held by his fingers. I could answer him in a lot of ways. He already knew about Xen. He already knew about my 'seer' powers as I confessed that to him before I left. I could say many things.

That I needed to receive my new life without qualm. That I needed to accept that Xen was gone and my life with him, gone too. That...I was coming to realize that I needed to let Xen go. That some love cannot transcend lifetimes. That maybe, it just wasn't meant to be.

I looked back at Karura's picture.

Her love for us transcended death. But I wonder if my love for Xen did too. Even now, I wonder what he was doing. Who he had become. Where he is. I have always thought that with my death, it was only Xen's loss, that he'd lost me. However, I know now that's not true. I lost him also when I died.

I closed my eyes. I swallowed the emotions, the memories, and the promises made in another lifetime. In another world.

"Because Gaara," I opened my eyes to look at him, "I'm beginning to see that all we can do is live as we endure loss."

I have to accept that reality.

I looked away, unable to hide the tears. I covered my eyes with my arms, tugging my knees into my chest.

Xen once told me, when he lost his family, that all he could do was endure...even if he lost all he was. I hadn't wanted to believe in those words, but I saw before my eyes what loss did to Xen. My love hadn't been enough to save him from himself, so why would it be able to transcend time?

I felt as Gaara hugged me. I turned into his warmth.

No one else could understand this. I couldn't cry like this in front of anyone, but Gaara. Only he understood even if he didn't know everything. His arms, still so lanky and skinny, were comforting. I've missed Gaara so much.

I just wanted to forget. I didn't want my memories anymore.

I just wish...I could forget.

* * *

><p>:::<em>In Konoha<em>:::

* * *

><p>Ryuu woke up with a gasp, heart pounding. He blinked away the shadows, eyes adjusting to the moonlight. He looked around his room. Sweat coated his skin, his body shaking still from the dream. It was the same one. The same person. The same woman. Over and over.<p>

He remembered the memories after losing his family; he remembered joining the marines, and even losing his humanity as the years of darkness took over. He remembered reading and watching Naruto, Death Note, Code Geass, and many many other anime and manga. But he could never remember why.

He remembered dying at the hands of a child…but his mind felt blank, as if someone had taken a part of him away. The emptiness hollowed him to a point of insanity…except when he was dreaming.

He opened his eyes and looked at the window and out towards the moon.

Suddenly, an image of a fair hair woman crossed his mind, her dark sapphire eyes filled with determination as she turned to him. He squeezed his eyes shut as her image entered his mind. The images were killing him, the images of the unknown woman.

He clenched his fists and closed his eyes as he looked down. These images of her had started all those years ago after eating with Naruto.

Her voice, the first words he could remember in this lifetime was that _**Maybe he'll save you too**_.

Save him? From what?

Since the massacre, the images of the unknown woman had appeared...and had not stopped. Instead they haunted him. When he walked around Konoha or when he talked with others (especially Haru) she'll appear like a mist and hover around him until he left with an urgency that had everyone questioning him.

She haunted his dreams and it were the dreams that hurt the most.

There would be dreams where they were together, laughing, and kissing or just lying next to each other. Happy. But there would be nightmares where she was crying and nightmares where he couldn't find her no matter how hard he searched. Those dreams left him cold and empty.

He closed his eyes and felt as his whole body slumped down. He could no longer sleep without dreaming about her, he could no longer be with anyone without feeling the hollowness inside of him. She haunted his consciousness and sub consciousness.

He breathed out heavily as he ran a trembling hand through his hair. Nothing scared him, nothing but her. The unknown woman of his dreams…of his life.

Her smile, her frown, her laughter, her cries. They filled his night with emotions that died as soon as he woke or as soon as he realized that she wasn't real, that she couldn't be real. What made it worse was that he craved those moments when he'll see her.

Her face, her voice, and her faint phantom touch soothed him. She took away the hollowness inside of him.

The only time he could escape her was when he disappeared into his Takama-ga-hara.

Inner Xen would only ignore him or disappear whenever he brought up this mysterious woman. Ryuu had tried to look through all his memories, opening every single door...reliving every single memory, no matter how painful, just to try and find out who she was.

But he was getting nowhere. There was nothing there. As if the woman didn't and never existed.

Ryuu laid back down on his futon, staring at the ceiling.

If these were memories, then he just wanted to forget.

He didn't want these memories anymore.

He just wished...he could forget.

:::

**Takama-ga-hara**

**Xen stared at the screen. He saw what Ryuu saw, heard what Ryuu heard. Ryuu's thoughts opened to him like a book. As if Ryuu's life was a reality TV show, splayed for just his entertainment. He leaned onto his knees. His eyes were listless. He covered his lips. **

**It was never entertaining though. **

**He saw the dreams (or nightmares as Ryuu called them). He saw her. Xen leaned back into the couch, sighing as he ran a hand through his hair. He hated this. He hated lying to Ryuu. To everyone.**

**He stood up and as soon as he did, a door appeared. He entered and closed it behind him, a long hallway with doors on all sides appearing. As he walked pass them, he ignored them. He's been through this path many times. He's watched Ryuu walk this path over and over, desperately seeking answers to the unknown woman. **

**Unknown. **

**Xen grimaced. He hated lying. **

**He stopped at a particular door. He stared at it. It was a gruesome ugly door with a gnarled handle and blood oozing down the frame. The wood itself looked charred, smelling like charred flesh. The uglier the memory, the uglier the door. **

**The memory of Xen's first kill. Of that night where everyone he loved died. **

**No. **

**Not everyone.**

**Xen looked away and right across from the gruesome door stood the complete opposite. It was pure glass with golden frames, the handle crisp and clean, beautifully sculpted silver. **

**The first kiss. The first understanding of love for a woman. With a wave of his hand, Xen made the door disappear, just like he always did when Ryuu came. It was not time yet for Ryuu to rediscover her. **

**It was not time yet for Ryuu to know what Xen has done. **

**But Xen hated lying. **

**He looked away and continued walking, leaving both doors behind. As he made it to long hallway, Xen stopped. He stared at the empty wall before closing his eyes and summoning a door. This door was different from any other. **

**Why? **

**Because it had a name on it: **Shisui

**Xen paused at the door. He stared at the name. There were many other names, many other doors. All with secrets and all hidden through lies. **

**He hated lying. **

**But it couldn't be helped. **

**Slowly, he opened the door. **

_**And so we go on**_

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><p><strong>~TBC~<strong>

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><p><span><strong><em>MUST READ! (Please?)<em>**

_A/N: Hello all. I am still alive. Broken, worn out, but alive. It's been a mixture of things. _

_First, college life sucks the life out of you with papers, exams, finals, and much much studying. I am learning a lot though. _

_Second, my uncle passed away a month ago. He was my mom's younger brother and someone I grew up with and I love (loved) my silly goofy uncle like crazy. His loss...I have no words to describe what losing him has done to me or my family. RIP, uncle Peach. _

_Third, I am studying abroad next year for five months. I am unsure of what this will do with my writing, but I will be busy busy busy, working and getting $$$ so I can study abroad without financial worries. I'm sorry to say that I will be very busy, even during the summer this year. _

_Fourth, I am truly sorry for updating so late. I need to still work on and update my Inuyasha fanfic. _

_Fifth, I am starting to become scare that my writing will not meet the expectations of those of you who follow/favorite this story. I have much to do. Much to explain. Much to write. I hope that this is a worthy story for you, my avid and faithful readers. _

_Finally, I think that life is a beautiful mess that we all find ourselves trying to swim through. So best wishes for everyone and that you all are doing well and staying strong through everything life is handing you._

_Sincerely,_

_Your Always Working To Be Worthy Author - Timely_

_P.S. I've been getting reviews about it being confusing with all the different POVs and changes of scenarios, so I will post up chapter summaries as where I am going, what's happening, to lessen the confusion. There have been suggestion for me to just write a separate story of just Xenryuu's POV, but then it would be harder for everyone to switch back and forth and for me to tie the two stories together as things do happen (sometimes) simultaneously._

_Last Question to Readers: I might just start doing a quick scan/reflection of POVs for events up until Chunin exams as I am DYING for that moment to come, but at the same time, as much as I wish to skip, I must build the story! What do you think?_

_I sometimes forget I'm the writer of this fanfic and not a reader..._

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><p><span><strong><em>(No Longer Required to Read unless you reviewed or just want some general lil information I might have added onto comments)<em>**

_:::**Replies to Reviews for Previous Update**:::_

_I usually don't do this because I always find that it's very time consuming for me and that sometimes fans don't really care to read them, but just for this update, I will because it's been too long. _

_And if you are fine with me doing this at the end of every update, I might keep doing it because I do enjoy seeing the reviews (I just sometimes have no good reply and thus find myself being awkward, lol). _

_But here it goes from latest to oldest:_

Guest 

Thank you for your kind words. It makes me happy because I DO know that some people don't like it. But I have to say, what some people do like makes no sense. I've always been an avid reader and writer so when I see horribly written fanfics with no plot, lots of grammar, I cringe. Yet these fanfics have many good reviews and likes. Maybe I'm just being mean, but I do find it weird.

Tayuke 

I'm glad to hear that you liked the beginning of this chapter. It took me a long time because I had to wonder, if Itachi had a lover…what would he be feeling just as he killed her? What would his last thoughts be? And I simply created a world where we can see what his thoughts, actions, and emotions were with her before she died at his hands.

Logical Fallacy

I love the name btw, it's great! Your constructive criticism was also very welcomed. I didn't really incorporate it into my chapter this time, but I will def keep it in mind for the next. I will challenge myself and hopefully you will review this chapter and describe how it worked and what I could do differently. But sometimes, I just do what I must lol so I hope if I don't do what you want, you won't be so disappointed.

Ichigo0-0Rose

Thank you for the review! And for asking questions. But as to answer, if you read this update, then you know the child is Itachi's daughter with Minori. Ryuu's too young for Minori! Lol. But no, Minori does not know and it will be further explained upon throughout the story and the next chapter!

Tamani

Thanks for the review and I know what you mean. The future is taking too long. I actually just want to skip…but I can't lol (Maybe. I'll think about it!)

But for your first review, I APPRECIATE YOU FOR YOUR REVIEW AND COMMITMENT to my story. Sasuke's personality will be different from canon. It can't NOT be because in the original, he had no one to rely on. I built Ryuu and Minori along with Rei up to remind Sasuke that he still has a family and that because he does, he wishes to protect them, even if this means from Itachi.

Gaara and Kinnara's reunion happened here, what did you think? I hope it was to your liking and as for the sand defense, it would be said that Gaara's sand defense recognizes Kinnara and has always recognized Kinnara as harmless thus has never truly defended Gaara against Kinnara.

cassjo

Thanks for the review! I hope this update was worth waiting for!

Tobee

Thank you for your two reviews and I'm wondering what it is when you say, "I wonder if they'll find out"? There are A LOT of things they need to find out, lol.

llat-2

Thanks for the reviews and the hypothetical questions! Those ARE THE QUESTIONS of the story, lol. But they will be further explored as he continue. But as for Xen's mental assaults…yea, it's his thing. Inner Xen is Ryuu's subconscious though so it makes sense that he does that. He will definetly be getting some Naruto therapy and some Kinnara slapping. Kinnara…she does fill Xenryuu's dark soul with light. Sometimes, we need those people in our lives and for Xenryuu, it's Kinnara, Haru, Sasuke, and Rei. But mostly Kinnara.

As for Naruto and Danzou, they will be coming up soon. Hopefully next chapter. Itachi's reaction…well, it'll be interesting.

NinjaDemonAngel

Thanks! I love the review and your compliment. I hope this chapter was worth your waiting!

EdenMae

I'm glad to hear you are enjoying it, but sorry that it made you cried! Lol, but it's a compliment of a sorts so thanks. But I hope this update was worth waiting for!

Angel

Thanks! I love the picture too and appreciate Skyea's work! It is truly beautiful what she has captured from my imagination.

Angel Is A Centerfold

Lol, thanks for the review and for saying its meta. I think it's meta too and kept looking for a SI OC x SI OC, but couldn't find one at all so here is my try for it!

Queen of Narnia49

Thanks for the review! But yes the baby is Itachi's lol. I was tempted to do babies…but then it would have been clichéd in a way and difficult to incorporate two children. After seeing Kishimoto give Sasuke a daughter, I wanted to give Itachi one too. He deserves one. Even in fanfic. As for your constructive criticism, I have been thinking about it and there have been reviews about your concern with the fragmented feel of the story. I agree with you. I have yet to figure out what to do. Writing another story is an option, but I would think it'll be more difficult for everyone and when I do combine the two, it would be difficult as sometimes, I just want Kinnara's POV to be known or Xenryuu's…or maybe just a 3rd POV that describes Kinnara or Ryuu. Thank you for the suggestion and it is being contemplated!

Onewhocantspell

LOL, thanks for the review and the excitement. I really do just want to skip everything and go straight to the pairing…of Xenryuu and Kinnara, of Itachi and Minori…*sigh* But I must build it up! Sorry!

easilyaddictedgirl

Thanks for the review! I truly loved it and I am also very excited when they meet (I have yet to write it…well, I do have some written work on it, just not completed). I love Sarada too! Wish Kishimoto will do more with her and the newer generation. But lmao, I found it strange to write even a little smexy scene with Itachi just because, well, it's Itachi…lol.

As for your question: Xenryuu…is a complicated person with lots and lots of issues. Thus, the reason why he was reborn as an Uchiha! Lol. But he will get it solved later and the fusion of the two will be coming soon, just not next chapter.

katchile94 

Thanks for the review! I tried to be original, but I also wanted to see some SI OC x SI OC, but couldn't find any so I just decided to do one myself! Xen's history will be developed as we go further and it will be posted onto my profile so just check there. Also, Kinnara name…yes, it is being hidden. For the perfect moment. You'll see!

Maester Ta

Thanks for the review! Truly appreciated. I can't wait for the Chunin exams either! I just wish to skip everything and go straight to it…I might…maybe…but I know I can't. lol.

hmm

Lol, thanks for the review and the honesty. Minori getting pregnant at 16 isn't that bad, in my opinion, because if she's old enough to kill people, she should be old enough to have a kid…thus the irony of the shinobi world. lol But to Kinnara, I'm glad you like her. I hope that this update gave enough parts from her POV for your liking!

MerhppDerhpp

Thanks for the reviews and dedication to this fanfic! Because of your review about the TV show, I had to add that to Xen's moment in Takama-ga-hara about reality TV shows, lol so there you go! Some reality show. But I know…Itachi having a kid…surprised me too. Mostly because original, he wasn't supposed to, but then it came to mind and just wouldn't leave. It was a way of developing Minori's character and to further change her character. I also at first had the child be a son, but then after Kishimoto gave Sasuke a daughter, I decided I wanted to give Itachi a daughter of his own. It's cute…imo. But I hope the gender change wasn't disappoint to you! I'm sorry if it is!

As for the update, I had it already there and just coulnd't leave it. Plus I knew I had finals coming and didn't want to NOT update so I decided to just use my free time then to finish it so that the next time I had time to work on it (which wasn't until now) I could focus on the canon timeline! Thank you for the compliment and I also hope my audience will grow, but even if it doesn't, it makes me happy I have readers such as you.

:::

**P.S. For the Guest who reviewed as "I'm confused", please explain why so I can handle and know what to do. Also just like to point something out:**

***Itachi killed his whole clan when he was 13. Minori having a kid at 16 is not the worst thing to ever happen in the Narutoverse!***

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><p><em>Thanks for all the favoritesfollows and reviews! It's good to hear from readers and/or know that I have readers!_

**(P.S. I like llat-2's referecence of Xen and Ryuu as Xenryuu. That's hilarious. **

**Never thought of the two of them like that, but yes...Kinnara could fill Xenryuu's dark soul with light.)**


	17. Foxes and Snakes

**Previously in a World Only We Know**

_In Konoha, Minori reveals to us the last five years and her daughter's influence on the remaining Uchiha survivors. Sasuke also is seen reflecting upon his relationship with the other Uchiha survivors, Rei's birth, and his new found 'friendships'. _

_In Suna, the three wonders have returned and the Sand Twins finally reunite, with Kinnara making some much needed decisions. However, her decision is, unbeknownst to either of them, very similar to those of Ryuu as he is awakened by a nightmare of the mysterious woman he cannot remember._

_We also learn that __Xen, inner mind and subconscious of Ryuu, hates lying. _

_He really hates it. _

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><p><em><strong>"..." -<strong>_

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><p><span><strong>17 - Foxes and Snakes<strong>

**Konoha**

Hiruzen waved them off to find Naruto and the Scroll of Sealing, puffing smoke from his pike. He was about to turn away when he noticed a single lone figure that remained. His eyes narrowed slightly.

"Ryuu-kun," he whispered softly as he lifted his pipe away from his mouth.

The young Uchiha's face was expressionless as he asked curtly, "How did something so important get taken so easily by a boy who couldn't even pass the Final Exam?"

Hiruzen stiffened at the harsh tone behind his words. He opened his mouth to speak, but before he could, another figure appeared next to Ryuu. Hiruzen placed the pipe back between his lips. He puffed more smoke out before greeting the Hyuuga heir.

"Haru-kun."

Haru grimaced at Ryuu even as he nodded in greeting towards the hokage.

"Ryuu-nii, come on. Let's find Naruto-kun." He took hold of Ryuu's arm, but the other boy shrugged him off.

"Hiruzen-san can find him just fine. Can't you hokage-sama?"

Hiruzen stiffened once more. Haru quickly slapped a hand on Ryuu's head, making him bow. The Uchiha surprisingly complied.

"I apologize on his behalf, hokage-sama," the Hyuuga heir breathed out hurriedly. "We should get going though. Naruto and the Scroll of Sealing…stuff like that."

Hiruzen collected himself. He watched with calm eyes as Ryuu gave him one more accusing look before the young Uchiha was dragged away by Haru. The older boy whispered furiously at the younger one. Hiruzen let out a deep breath as the two boys disappeared. He shook his head, about to walk away.

"That boy," a voice whispered softly behind him, "should be taught respect."

"Danzo," Hiruzen greeted cautiously as he recognized the voice.

"You should have allowed me to discipline the boy," Danzo said louder.

Hiruzen heard the indignation behind his voice. More than he was comfortable with. He watched as his old nakama stepped out from the shadows.

The Sandaime fought the sigh wishing to escape. Instead, he shook his head at his old friend.

"Uchiha Ryuu does not require the discipline you wish for. The child needs—"

"At twelve the boy is no longer a child," Danzo interrupted gruffly. "He's a Konoha jounin yet he cannot even respect his hokage."

Hiruzen sighed this time, unable to hold it back anymore.

"Danzo, I will not change my decision. You will leave the Uchiha alone. They have suffered enough."

Danzo wisely made no comment. Instead, he turned away and walked off. Hiruzen sighed as he shook his head once more. He should go see where Naruto was. He clenched his jaw. Ryuu's words came back to him. Shaking his head of the boy's accusing face, Hiruzen quickly made his way back to his office.

**_…later that night_**

Danzo nodded curtly, dismissing the ROOT member. He turned away and looked out the window of his secret base. Naruto now knew about the Kyuubi and the Scroll of Sealing has been returned. Danzo's eyes hardened as he clenched his fists. To think the Scroll of Sealing was taken so easily.

He thought back to Uchiha Ryuu's words. Indeed, how did Hiruzen allow such an important scroll to be so easily taken. Danzo closed his eyes, breathing out softly.

Uchiha Ryuu has made quite a name for himself: the Crimson Dragon. Both for his name and his sharingan. Danzo reopened his eyes. It was to be expected though. The boy was the only son of Konoha's infamous Demon Eyes.

The elder had hoped that with Kaito's death and the massacre, he would have access to the sharingans of the Demon Eyes. He stared down at his empty arm in a makeshift sling around his shoulder. He clenched his fingers into a fist, anger and frustration coursing through him.

He missed both chances to get his hands on the eyes of that particular Uchiha line. Not just Shisui's Kotoamatsukami and Kaito's eyes, but several others he had been hoping to receive. Uchiha Ryuu had sealed the compound off, wishing to bury everything including whatever was left of the Uchiha bodies. The Uchiha sharingans.

Jaw clenched, Danzo's fingers slackened. He turned sharply from the window.

No matter.

Danzo will protect Konoha with or without the sharingans. He knew better than to try anything with the remaining Uchiha. Although, the unexpected birth of the Uchiha child was an interesting turn of events.

He was unable to guess who the father of the child was. There had been no name on the birth certificate. He threw away the thought of the child being a result of rape as Uchiha women never took on missions that would have allowed something like that to occur. Danzo also threw out the idea of the child being Shisui's. He knew the two were good friends, but the child had been conceived after the death of the boy.

However, before he could dig more into the matter, Hiruzen suddenly shut down everything and anything that had to do with the child. Danzo had an inkling this had something to do with Uchiha Ryuu. The boy, despite Danzo's frustration, was a worthy opponent. Always one step ahead of Danzo, rather or not he even knew it. Besides Hiruzen's firm stance on the matter and Itachi's looming threat, Danzo knew that Uchiha Ryuu was not a force he wished to reckon with. Yet.

It didn't help that the Silver Sun of Konoha stood behind the Crimson Dragon. Danzo grimaced. It was surreal for a Hyuuga, the heir of all things, to befriend an Uchiha. The Silver Sun and Crimson Dragon. A Hyuuga and an Uchiha, working together. As frustrating as it was, Danzo couldn't help but be intrigued by the duo.

They were like day and night. However, which one was day and which one was night has yet to be decided. The Silver Sun seem to shine brighter than the Crimson Dragon. The Hyuuga heir was becoming a fast favorite of many civilians.

Danzo found his talent wasted on low-paying D-missions that no one else wanted. The boy was also a familiar face in the Academy since he frequently visited his younger sisters.

Danzo frowned. That light from the Hyuuga heir though, was simply more visible than that of the Uchiha prodigy. Hyuuga Haru was not as impressive in skills or intelligence. Even Hyuuga Neji was praised more than the heir for his byakugan prowess.

How disappointing it must be for the Hyuuga clan that a branch member was stronger than their heir. Not that Hyuuga Haru was someone to underestimate. His training with Uchiha Ryuu kept the boy at his peak.

Still. Danzo wondered what Hyuuga Haru would be without Uchiha Ryuu.

What would the sun be without its fire?

_**...the next Morning**_

Naruto's grin was so wide that it was beginning to hurt his face. But he didn't care. He touched his head band, proof of his awesomeness. He's finally a shinobi! Soon, he will be hokage! Naruto laughed out loud at the thought, slamming his door open.

"I'm home!"

Not expecting a reply, Naruto gave a high pitch scream when a soft voice replied, "Welcome back."

Naruto threw himself against the wall, eyes wide as his voice stopped short mid scream when he recognized the familiar cloak and fox mask. Covering his mouth, Naruto glared at the other boy.

"What the—No Face! Why did you scare me like that, dattebayo!?"

No Face shook his head. "Can you repeat that without covering your mouth?"

Naruto grimaced and did as he asked, throwing an accusing finger at the other boy.

"What the hell are you doing here?!" Naruto narrowed his eyes at him. "It's still morning. I thought you only came out at night."

"I'm not a vampire," a flat voice replied.

Naruto smirked at him. "Are you sure about that? You never eat and you only come over at night."

"Naruto, you just made the obvious observation that I'm here right now in broad daylight. I can't be a vampire if that is true, which it isn't."

Naruto opened and closed his mouth. He huffed and crossed his arms.

"You never answered my question. What are you doing here so early? I thought you said that you couldn't come during the day."

"I was worried about you."

Naruto's face scrunched up in confusion. "Huh? How come?"

No Face beckoned towards Naruto's forehead. Naruto looked up, blinking in confusion. Noticing his headband, the wide grin came back on his face.

"Oh yea! Ne, ne! Guess what?! I passed the Final Exam! I'm finally a shinobi, just like you No Face!" Naruto proudly rubbed his headband. "Iruka-sensei is even treating me to ramen again! Two times in one week, dattebayo!"

No Face came over. "Congrats. I knew you would make it."

Naruto grinned at him, eyes closed as he rubbed his head. "Yea, you did say for me not to worry."

"Yet you listened to Mizuki?"

At his words, Naruto's smile fell, his eyes opening as his arm fell back to his side. Frowning, Naruto took a step back. He looked away in shame.

"You said not to worry and I thought Mizuki-sensei was telling me the alternative to pass," Naruto's voice waivered before he turned to look at No Face. "I didn't know he was using me to steal the scroll, dattebayo."

No Face stood still, making Naruto nervous. The silence seem to spread as Naruto waited for the other boy to say something. Naruto realized what he did had put Konoha at stake, but he honestly thought Mizuki was not lying to him. He just…wanted to pass so badly.

"Naruto."

Naruto focused back towards No Face. He grimaced at the mask that revealed nothing. It was so frustrating.

"You understand that your path towards becoming hokage will not be easy. Last night has only made it more difficult. Many were willing to punish you for taking the scroll," No Face paused before turning his head towards the kitchen window. "It'll become harder to gain their trust. A hokage without his people's trust is no hokage at all."

Naruto frowned. He thought back to last night. Mizuki's words. The Kyuubi. Suddenly, everything stopped and Naruto froze. He turned wide eyes to No Face. If No Face knew that he was the Kyuubi…

Naruto shook his head. No Face cannot find out. He can't know. Naruto glanced at No Face.

The past five years has been some of his worst and best. Worst because as he got older, the villagers treatment only escalated. Now he knew why. If No Face knew, he would start acting like the rest of the villagers.

The thought sent Naruto reeling, his stomach twisting and heart suddenly pounding. He panicked. If No Face knew...there would be no more late night visits and exploration of Konoha.

No more watching stars on top of the Hokage would never wake up to a stocked fridge or a cooked breakfast awaiting his table. He has even come to enjoy cleaning and washing dishes with No Face. Something must have shown on his face because No Face's next words made Naruto stare at him in open shock.

"The kyuubi still create fear even now. What a shame."

Naruto's heart pounded against his chest. "Y-you know about the kyuubi?"

"Always have," No Face said with a nod.

Naruto's mind spun as he took in those two simple words. No Face has always known. He's—

"B-but," Naruto slammed his hands on the kitchen table, "you don't hate me?!"

"Neither does Iruka-sensei or the Hokage." There was a slight pause. "Naruto, the kyuubi is sealed within you. It's not you."

Naruto's jaw clenched. He breathed heavily out from his nose as he bowed his head. His clenched his fists.

"You mean," his shoulders began shaking, "you've always known and…and—"

Naruto shook his head, unable to believe it. Sudden tears appeared in his eyes, shocking him. He quickly tried to wipe them away, but they stubbornly continued. He clenched his fingers.

No Face has never hated him even though he's known all along. He stiffened, flinching a little when No Face suddenly touched him, but he relaxed as he looked up. To his shock, No Face had removed his mask a little, revealing never before seen lips.

"Everything will be alright, Naruto."

Naruto shook his head, eyes squeezing shut and the tears fell freely. Naruto rubbed is eyes, taking in deep breaths before looking over at No Face. The odd mysterious boy was unreadable, with his posture and his mask.

Naruto didn't know what to make of No Face. The boy was a shinobi, but he was also very close to age as Naruto. He only knew one other kid around his age that was a shinobi.

Uchiha Ryuu, another mysterious yet strangely kind kid that has begun looking out for Naruto five years ago. Eyes scrunched, Naruto felt as if he was missing something. He scratched his head, rubbing his headband as he tried to figure out the strange sensation that there was something he wasn't seeing. Lips pursed, Naruto watched as No Face turned away.

"You've probably haven't eaten all night. I'll get something ready."

Naruto relaxed. He finished wiping the tears and grinned, all previous thoughts forgotten at the sound of food.

"Can we have ramen today?! I'm hungry, dattebayo." As if to agree, Naruto's stomach growled.

He rubbed his head sheepishly. No Face sighed which to Naruto is always a good sign.

"Fine, fine. But don't forget about your Ninja Registration Form and," No Face turned to him. "Remember not to restock your milk and to chap your lips the morning of orientation. Okay?"

"Huh?" Naruto scratched his head.

No Face shook his head. "Nevermind. Come on, your stomach is probably dying."

Naruto followed after the boy and began taking vegetables out at No Face's orders. He quickly forgot what it was that he was trying to figure out moments ago.

:::

Sasuke's eyes studied the ceiling tiles as he waited for Ryuu's door to slide shut. After a few whisper of rustling clothes, Sasuke closed his eyes. He could hear the birds awakening from outside, their chirps and calls drifting into his room through the slightly ajar door that faced their backyard.

Sasuke enjoyed sleeping with the back door open. It kept him at peace knowing he had more than one escape route. He turned his head slightly to catch the morning sunlight seeping through the crack of said door.

It was a while before he sat up, sleep alluding him as it usually does whenever he awakens. He ran a hand through his hair, eyes staring at the floor. He slowly rose from his tatami futon. Stretching, he yawned softly to himself. He walked towards the ajar door and fully opened it, the morning sun lighting his room in a brilliant ray of light. He covered his eyes briefly before they adjusted to the brightness. Hand falling away, Sasuke began walking silently towards the kitchen.

He hated walking through the hallway in the morning. There was a creak right next to Ryuu's room that he could never evade. In the beginning, the creak had annoyed him as it prevented him from ever sneaking away. Now, it annoyed him. Sasuke paused outside of Rei's room.

He knew she would be up soon, being the third earliest riser of the family. Minori was always the last to wake. Well, Ryuu always tried to make it look like he woke up after Minori, but Sasuke knew better. He was not sure if Minori knew about Ryuu's early escapes or late night excavations to who knows where.

If his guesses were right, it was probably to see Haru or heck, maybe even Naruto. With a shrug, Sasuke let it go. Instead, he walked away from Rei's room and focused back on his earlier route to the kitchen.

As he entered, he paused at the sight of their family photo. His heart lightened a little. He stopped to fix the photo, despite knowing it didn't need to be fixed. He just liked the feeling of it being in his hands. It was a reminder him that he was not alone.

Unlike Naruto.

Frowning, Sasuke set the photo down and began making rice for their breakfast. When Rei woke up, the two of them would travel to their chicken coup to collect eggs later. But as he made rice, Sasuke thought back to when he found out Naruto was an orphan…

_"Why is the dobe always here," Sasuke muttered as he sat next to Minori overlooking their backyard._

_Naruto was inside, playing with Rei. Ryuu was with them. The toddler had just begun walking at thirteen months. Their home had finally been refurbished and since then, Ryuu's guests and friends have been invited over every night._

_Annoyingly, Naruto had become one such guest._

_Sasuke felt hot and unbearable jealousy course through his body. It didn't help that he could heard Rei's soft giggle as she trailed after Naruto. The blonde's annoying laughter echoed hers._

_Rei was their baby. Naruto shouldn't get to play with her like that. Ryuu, when Sasuke refused to be kinder to Naruto, had ordered him out. Sasuke had left and soon afterwards, Minori had followed him out. The two had been sitting in silence for a while._

_"Why does he always treat me as if I'm younger than him," Sasuke finally snapped._

_Sasuke hated that Ryuu treated him like a child. Sasuke clenched his fists. He felt even more emotions surge through him, hot and ugly. He wasn't a child anymore. They were the same age!_

_"He wouldn't treat you like a child if you didn't act like one," Minori's soft voice replied._

_Sasuke snapped his head to her, but his angry retort died a quick death when he saw the emotions on her face. Minori was frowning, eyes laced with frustration and… hurt?_

_"I know it must hurt to be treated like a child... but you keep acting like one, Sasuke-kun."_

_Before Sasuke could open his mouth, Minori held a hand up to silence him._

_"No, let me explain. Ryuu-kun is not not Fugaku-san or Mikoto-san," she breathed out softly, "nor is he Itachi." Sasuke flinched at the name, looking away. "Ryuu-kun treats you like a child because you act like this," she waved at Sasuke's overall figure._

_Sasuke's fingers clenched, taking in Minori's words. Breathing out through his nose, Sasuke turned back to her. "Then how do I get him to act treat me as an equal?"_

_Minori's lips pursed. She looked away from him. It was a while before she spoke._

_"Tell me, what do you know about Naruto?"_

_This time it was Sasuke who blinked. He frowned in confusion. "Why does that matter?"_

_Minori shook her head, sighing a little. "Just answer the question, Sasuke."_

_Annoyed, Sasuke stood up, trembling in anger. "Fine! I don't know anything about the dobe except that he's always looking for attention! He's annoying and weak! All he does is talk and shout about being noticed! He doesn't care about his studies yet he wants to be hokage! He acts like a child—"_

_Sasuke froze as he realized what he'd just said. He focused back on Minori. The woman was looking at him with a look as if, 'do you understand now?'. Breathing out softly, Sasuke sat back down, forearms on his knees as he hung his head._

_"Oh." He pursed his lips, studying the ground. "Is that how you all see me? As annoying and weak?"_

_"No," Minori said kindly. "We see you as a child because you still only think about yourself. You said that all Naruto does is get attention, but you don't care to even ask why he does that."_

_"But why should I care," Sasuke mumbled before looking up. "He's just an attention—"_

_"He's an orphan too, you know," Ryuu suddenly cut him off gently._

_Sasuke stiffened as Minori turned around. Slowly, Sasuke followed Minori's gaze. The two of them watched as Ryuu sat down on Sasuke's other side. But Ryuu was looking up ahead, his eyes unreadable._

_"He's never had parents. He understands more than you think about how you're feeling now, Sasuke, with the loss of our family."_

_Sasuke clenched his fingers. "But you just said he's never had a family before! He's always been alone! He doesn't understand what it means to lose them! He'll never understand my suffering! You don't even understand! It wasn't your brother who betrayed everyone you loved!" Sasuke was breathing hard. He covered his eyes. "No one understands!"_

_Minori frowned. There was a moment before anyone spoke. It was Ryuu who broke the silence._

_"That may be true," Ryuu breathed out softly. "Naruto's never had a family. He's never suffered in the same way you did or are. It wasn't our brother who killed our clan. It wasn't our brother who betrayed us. That's right." Sasuke looked up. Onyx eyes clashed. "But that doesn't mean we don't understand."_

_Ryuu reached out and grabbed Sasuke's collar, fingers tightening. Minori clutched her knees, stopping herself from interfering. She was sensing this was more between the two boys than anything._

_"You want to know about solitude...? Naruto's never even known his parents love. He's never heard their voices, never known what it's like to return home to a family. To be hated by the village, outcastes everywhere you go? That kind of solitude Sasuke," Ryuu's eyes clenched shut, "is worse than the suffering you are going through now. You still have us and you can have many others. The village loves you. Naruto has no one." Ryuu's eyes open, Sasuke trembled. "He has no one, Sasuke."_

_Letting Sasuke go, Ryuu stood up, turning his back to them._

_"You don't want me treating you like a child? Well, start realizing this world doesn't revolve around you. You aren't the only one suffering. The only difference, you aren't hated. Naruto is." Ryuu turned back to him, eyes hard. "But then again, I wonder if you've ever cared enough to notice." Ryuu clenched his fists. "You've changed since the massacre. Sometimes…I wonder if you will turn your back on us too, Sasuke. On Minori and Rei. On me. You want to avenge the clan alone. You don't care about others. For someone who says he hates Itachi, you sure are taking after him."_

_Both Minori and Sasuke flinched at his words. Without another look back, Ryuu returned into their home._

… Sasuke's jaw clenched. He didn't want to become like Itachi. He didn't want to betray those who loved him.

Sure, he didn't like Naruto. But he understood now why Ryuu did. He couldn't imagine what it would do to him if he didn't have Minori or Rei, what it would be like without Ryuu.

He couldn't imagine what that life of solitude could be. In a way, Sasuke did have respect for Naruto, no matter how annoying the boy was. To be alone for so long and to have never had anyone...it would drive Sasuke crazy.

A light tug on his sleeve brought him out of his head. He blinked and looked to his side. A smile replaced the frown on his lips, his whole body suddenly relaxing.

"Good morning, Rei," he said, lifting a wet hand to tap her forehead.

The act made him pause though, flinching a little. He looked away, burying himself into the rice to prevent Rei from seeing his reaction to that little gesture.

His heart had sped up as he tried to control his breathing. Rei's open giggle helped calm him. He dared to take a peek at her and couldn't help but smile as she rubbed the droplet of water from her forehead.

"Sasuke-nii! Rei-chan took a bath last night with okaa-san already," she mumbled with a slight pout that had followed her earlier giggle.

Sasuke quickly finished the rice, wiping his hands dry before turning back to her. He knelt a little so they were eye leveled. He smiled at her, hand reaching out to tap her nose.

"Did you?" He stood up and grabbed one of the bucket at the side of the sink. "To apologize, how about we go pick some eggs? Rei can play with the chicks after we done."

At the promise, Rei's eyes lit up. She nodded enthusiastically as she ran out towards the chicken coup first. Sasuke couldn't help, but laugh after her.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Not far away in Suna...<strong>_

The Kazekage rubbed his brow in frustration at the sight of the picture on his desk. It's only been a few days since she's returned and he's already preparing to send her off again. He sighed as he snatched the picture and hid it beneath some paperwork. He set his kage hat aside, slipping into his seat and opened his drawer to gather his materials to begin his day of work.

Looking down into the drawer, he felt his eyes twitch. Another picture. With larger words isigned with a familiar signature. Even after five years, her handwriting was still very childlike.

He sighed and took the note out, rereading it.

_I knew you would ignore the first picture, so here's a second one. Remember: BEWARE OF SNAKES!_

And scrawled beneath the message was Kinnara's name (the kanji still wrong even after all these years). Frowning, he studied the picture. It was of a snake...swallowing what looked like sand, but he couldn't be sure because Kinnara's drawing skills, like her writing, still needed work. He pulled out the first picture and compared it to the second. The first was a picture of a snake with fangs embedded of a foot that was stepping on it. Beneath the picture were the words:

_Never trust a snake. -Ki_

He set the pictures down and rubbed his face. At least she got the first part of her name right. A knock at the door forced him to drop his hand and quickly mask his face.

"Come in," he began but the door opened even before he finished. The Kazekage's eyes narrowed at the...artist of the pictures on his desk. He waved his hands at them. "What is the meaning of this, Kinnara?"

His daughter smiled at him, her teeth flashing. "Was I right that you ignored the first one?"

"You've been leaving these...pictures since you've returned," he said roughly with a deepening frown. "Your latest obsession with snakes is," he paused, searching for a word, "disconcerting."

"Well," she mused as she came over and pushed the two pictures towards him, "I wouldn't be so obsessed if everyone just realized how dangerous and misleading snakes are."

His eyes furrowed together. "Snakes?"

Kinnara nodded, her eyes suddenly looking away from him as she stared around his office. "I, uh, heard some interesting stories about snakes while abroad."

The Kazekage, lips pursed, leaned back into his seat. He looked briefly at the pile of papers on his desk then at the clock. Taking a deep breath, he turned back to Kinnara. "And what do these stories tell you?"

He watched with interest as his words seem to brighten her face, her smile widening and eyes lighting up. As she began speaking, he felt as something, maybe guilt, coarse through him. He's been working on his social skills for the sake of her is children. Staring at Kinnara, he wondered if Karura would be happy...

"Well, there was a story about a snake who tricked a woman and her husband into eating a forbidden fruit," Kinnara gushed out quickly, as if afraid he would change his mind any moment, "and another about a goddess that would appear in dreams in the shape of a black snake with human ears that would signify a money problem an-and—"

"KINNARA! DO NOT THINK THE KAZEKAGE WILL GET YOU OUT OF YOUR MORNING EXERCISES!"

Kinnara groaned, immediately turning around to face the door just as it slammed open, a fuming Chiyo breathing hard with one hand on the door.

"How dare you," the elder began as she shook a fist at the younger girl, "switch my tea with sleeping powder just to try and get out of training! I will have you know, my chakra has long since become immune to medical drugs, especially ones I make myself!"

"Damn," the Kazekage heard Kinnara mutter under her breath, "I forgot about that."

He felt his lips twitched, but fought it down and instead turned stern eyes to his daughter. "You tried to drug Chiyo-baasama?"

"Emphasis on the try," Kinnara muttered as she crossed her arms, eyes turning back and forth between the two of them. "I wouldn't have tried to if she would stop insisting on these boring morning exercises."

Chiyo balked at her words. "BORING?!"

The Kazekage lifted a hand to stop Chiyo from continuing. The elder begrudging quieted just as Ebizo appeared at the door. He smiled at the scene, as if it was another regular morning.

"Good morning, Kazekage-sama," the other elder greeted him. "I see Kinnara-sama's attempt to avoid nee-chan's morning exercises involves you today."

"What exactly are these exercises," the Kazekage questioned, curiosity now peaked at the realization that this isn't the first confrontation between his youngest and the elder.

Ebizo and Chiyo both opened their mouth, but Kinnara beat them to it with a loud exclamation of "healing fishes!"

"Not just healing," Chiyo interuppted, eyes glowering at her pupil before turning back to the Kazekage with a serious expression. "You are fully aware, are you not, of Kinnara's chakra being fused with Shukaku's more volitile one?" At the mention of the bijuu, everyone grew tense. Chiyo breathed out softly as Ebizo closed the door. "She is not ready to test her skills on a human being, Kazekage-sama."

Kinnara moved forward, as if to object, but one look from Chiyo silenced her. The Kazekage studied his daughter, noticing the sudden droop of her shoulders and how her hair fell forward to cover her face as she looked away from them. He turned back to Chiyo. He watched as her eyes softened when the elder watched his daughter. He blinked.

He should be surprise that someone as stern as Chiyo could look so caring at someone that wasn't family...but he wasn't. As he turned back to look at his daughter, he could understand why Chiyo and Ebizo have grow fond of the girl.

"I understand you believe you are ready," Chiyo said softly with a lace of sternness, "but you cannot forget that you have yet to overcome that thirty percent failure rate. We have yet to discover what triggers Shukaku's chakra to enter into your own. The chakra may not harm you, but it will harm everyone else."

At her words, his eyes sharpened back onto the elder. "And what of Gaara?"

Everyone turned to him, Chiyo's eyes calculating as Ebizo's eyes furrowed together in concentration. But what shocked him was the objection and fear he saw in Kinnara's eyes as she swirled back to him.

"No," his daughter whispered just as Chiyo said, "It should work."

Kinnara snapped to Chiyo, her fists clenching. "And if it doesn't?"

Understanding came then to the Kazekage as he watched his daughter. He vaguely listened to Chiyo's answer. Their conversation fell onto deaf ears as he ran through his thoughts. It amazed him even now how much Gaara seem to come first for his daughter.

This...was concerning.

The Kazekage looked away, eyes following a familiar path towards the picture of Karura that sat on the shelf next to his window. A ninja should always put their village first. Always. He had a feeling that Kinnara would not hesitate to sacrifice Sunagakure for Gaara if asked. He clenched his jaw, eyes studying the smiling photo of his wife. A wife he had sacrificed for the village.

"I am not risking Gaara," Kinnara bit out, her sharp voice bringing him back to their conversation.

Blinking, the Kazekage turned back to Kinnara. Chiyo was frowning, disapproval on her face. Ebizo's expression was unreadable.

"If you wish to continue to grow stronger in your medic skills, this is a risk you must be willing to take, Kinnara-sama," Ebizo whispered gently.

This only seem to make her angrier, her whole body seeming to shake as she looked between the two elders as if they've lost their minds. Her fists shook, the gourd on her back trembling a little even as the three adults saw how the sand swirled at her feet.

"You are telling me to risk Gaara's life so I can advance in my own skills? I would never do that! Not Gaara. I will rather spend the rest of my life waking up to heal those damn fishes and slowly decreasing my failure rate then risk Gaara—"

"No. You're skills can save will benefit all of Sunagakure. It is rare to have a medic that requires no other to guard her," the Kazekage interrupted softly. This brought three pairs of eyes onto him, as if they've forgotten he was there all along. He turned to Ebizo and Chiyo. "In a few weeks, we will test Kinnara's skill on Gaara. Until then, I ask of you to continue training her."

He turned and met Kinnara's eyes. He blinked at her expression just before she turned away and ran out of the room. Chiyo and Ebizo spoke their farewells quickly, immediately following the girl. He looked after them long after the door closed.

The Kazekage turned back to his desk and seated himself. Just as he was about to grab some of the can-no-longer-be-ignored paperwork, he paused at the two pictures that still laid on his desk. His hands stilled. His eyes furrowed in concentration on the drawings. He was unsure of how to handle his youngest. Since birth, she's always stood out. She never cried or reacted in the same way an infant should. Even then, she was curious and too observant. And now?

He sighed, a hand rubbing his face as he remembered the expression of her face before she'd run out of the room. The betrayal he saw in her eyes left an uneasy feeling in his chest. He fought them, but in the end, he wasn't even sure who truly won.

Some time passed before the Kazekage finally began working on the paperwork around his desk.

But off to the side, next to the photo of his wife, were two drawings of snakes.

_**And so we go on**_

* * *

><p><strong>~TBC~<strong>

* * *

><p><em>AN: Hello all. I am still alive. Yes, yes. I know. It's been a while. But I am preparing for my trip, i.e. making $$$$, because this trip is not going to pay itself! Thank you for all of the reviews, favorites, follows, and/or for just taking the time to get this far in the story!_

_It is 6AM and I have to go to a wedding. So I will reply to reviews later and sadly, I was unable to find a quote for this particular chapter. Maybe You can suggest a quote for me? Until next time! _


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